The Price of a Collar
by Apple in the Ocean
Summary: Everyone wants to be wanted. Back from America, Alex has to battle with the unwanted attentions of World Intelligence agencies, memories that won't lay to rest, a maybe not-so-new enemy and an old unit who think they can give Alex the family he's always wanted. Battling against so many wants, Alex will have to choose his place fast- before others choose it for him.
1. Chapter 1

AN/: Hellooooo! Well! Welcome, I suppose, to my first ever fanfic! NO! NOT my first ever STORY but, well, fanfic. Yes, it's Alex Rider *laughs like a maniac*. I just ADORE Alex Rider books and (the good) fanfics! This will include K-Unit cos I love them, you love them, we ALL love them *champagne bottle uncorked*. The only reason this is T rated is because of the action scenes in later parts of the fic, no coarse language here! Erm...well, I suppose I should give you an idea of what's going to happen, right? *settles down and smiles charmingly* this _is _going to be a multi chapter fic because I LIKE writing and reading more than one chapter, as I'm sure you, my lovely readers do too! Now, I realise you all like updates (as do I, my friends, as do I) so I'd like to try and say that I'll get at least one chapter out a week? Bearing in mind, of course, that I lead a busy lifestyle, fanfiction _does not _feed me, do my school work, talk to my friends and send me to sleep. BUT! Wipe away those tears and REMOVE your hand from the back button! I am a great believer in promises and keeping up to date, so I will promise to _attempt _to get a new chapter out a week. Please. Your applause is too much. So yeah! I LOVE reviews. Seriously. Never had one before, but I'm sure they taste like chicken.

Yum.

But please tell me what you think! I'm giving you more whether you want it or not, but how am I meant to know what you want or don't want if you don't _tell _me! Anyway, here's the first chapter and a little description of what to expect (kinda) from the story!

Onwards and outwards my fellow soldiers!

**"Facts are just another form of a story, Alex. Harder, stricter, but very easy to twist."**

**When America doesn't work out and only causes more questions, Alex finds himself struggling in the greedy attention of MI6, CIA, a not-so-new enemy and secrets that should've been kept. When dreams collapse like bubbles and stark reality hits you hard in the face, it's up to Alex to try and turn the tables- even if they don't want to be turned.**

**DISCLAIMER: **Yes. I am Anthony Horowitz and I just LOVE writing fanfics of my own novel. I also enjoy listening to my green dog play the piano whilst I eat my grandma's socks. Seriously.

(Just for those weirdo's who think I _do _have a piano playing purple dog and eat my grandma's socks, I don't (usually). Nor do I own Alex Rider or any of Anthony Horowitz's mentioned characters.)

* * *

"Welcome back, Alex."

Mr Blunt peered at Alex, his face blank and eyes emotionless, giving no outward indication to what he was thinking. Mrs Jones, from where she stood to his side cast him a subtle look. Even after all these years of working for him, she still could not seem to be able to see behind that cleverly manufactured mask, something that both irked and fascinated her. It was something she herself was working to perfect.

"Let me go home."

The voice drew Mrs Jones out of her musings, and she turned her own flat gaze onto the holder of the toneless voice. Emotion stirred in her at the sight of him, but she kept it quenched. It wouldn't do to be showing her feelings everywhere- they were a hindrance, a means to be used against her.

But still…

Mrs Jones couldn't _help _but soften her eyes as the emotion kept rolling and whining inside of her chest. _Yes, _she saw Mr Blunt glance at her with a tight mouth, _yes, _she knew it was against protocol and rules and blahdeblahblah. But he just looked so…_empty._

She took in the way he sat, his shoulders to tense, those nutty eyes so hard and yet dull- like twin pebbles smoothed through time and hard experiences of the sea. His youthful face was drawn and dull, his expression mimicking Blunt's- secretive, hidden, giving nothing away.

But it wasn't right.

He was _fifteen _for goodness sake!

"You know that's not possible, Alex." Mr Blunt spoke as if Alex hadn't just asked such a poignant question. As if he wasn't telling a fifteen year old that _no, he couldn't go home_.

Mrs Blunt shook off the sharp thoughts with a mental shake, smoothing over her expression once again.

She couldn't act blameless. She had taken part in the destruction of this child. Instead, she turned away from the cowering thought, to greater; more important matters at hand. "You are needed here, Alex." She said slickly, rolling the peppermint in her mouth to the side with her tongue.

For a moment, Alex looked so tired.

Not the teenage I've-been-up-all-night-playing-video-games tired, but a bone weary tired- one she had only glimpsed on old war dogs, that tiredness that just begged to be let put to rest.

But they couldn't let him rest.

Mrs Jones steeled her resolve.

He was just too good.

Alex seemed to notice the change in her, his eyes flickering up resignedly to her, a hint of (betrayal?) something pained in his eyes before he too blanked it over. "I just want-" he broke off and closed his eyes.

There was pause in conversation, the only sound the sound of the peppermint clacking now and then against Mrs Jones' teeth as she rolled it in her mouth.

Mr Blunt carried on, voice neither comforting nor apologetic. Just, well, _blunt. _"You can't, Alex. You belong to us now." _Finally. _The word was missing, but Mrs Jones felt it all the same, and from the look on Alex's face, he did too.

She'd never been good at reading Mr Blunt's emotions, but suddenly she saw something in him.

Greed.

Hunger.

It flashed through his eyes so quickly; the sudden tightness in his hands as he clutched at the pencil in his fist, the rapid tense in his body- and then it was gone. So fast, but so much.

It was unsettling.

"I'll have you put with an agent," he carried on, voice suddenly uninterested. "They'll be looking after you when you're not on missions as you're too young to live by yourself."

Vague bitter amusement flickered onto Alex's usually impermeable expression. "If I'm old enough to take down criminal organisations, then I'm old enough to live by myself."

He carried on as if the teenager hadn't even spoken, eyes not really looking at Alex, more somewhere to the side of him. "The agent's name is Anthony Barkwell. He's a trusted agent, one I expect will look after you and your-" here, he paused critically. "-unusual personality."

"I can live by myself." Alex rephrased, as if Blunt didn't get it.

Again, he was ignored. "I expect you to behave well. Although he hasn't got as much field experience as you he will be-"

"I can live by myself." Louder this time, more urgent.

"-able to protect you from any outside threats that may come your way as various organisations learn of your retrieval. I haven't told him-"

"I don't want to live with some _stranger!_" Alex leant forward, gripping the armrests of his chair with alarming force.

"-of your mission status, and I expect you to understand that that is classified information. You will be contacted when we believe you have settled down well enough." He finished with a firm close of his mouth, eyes already falling to the files on his desk as he deemed the conversation over.

Alex looked to be straining on whether to keep an expressionless face, or to scowl. "I don't need-"

_Knock! Knock! Knock!_

"Come in." Mrs Jones called, noting briefly the way Alex's body had reacted to the sound of the fist on the door. It also did not escape her notice in the way his hand snaked towards the waistband of his jeans. She wondered if Mr Blunt had noticed, he was staring at the files on his desk, showing no apparent interest to the happenings around him.

The man stood awkwardly in the doorway, looking from Mr Blunt to Mrs Jones. He knew that Mr Blunt, the head, had called him, but it was obvious that the powerful man was not paying attention to him. Finally, he decided on speaking to the second in charge- Mrs Jones.

"Reporting for duty, ma'am." He said stiffly, looking at the point just above Mrs Jones' head like it had been drilled into him in army S.A.S service.

"Of course, Agent Barkwell." She smiled softly, the expression suddenly meaningless on her face. "You're well on time."

He forced himself not to squirm under the close scrutiny that he was going through- replying only with a gruff little jerk of his head.

"I take it you have read the files?"

"Guardianship mission, undercover as an adopted parent for one Alex Rider- personal data: classified." He rolled off mechanically.

"Wonderful," was the soft reply. Suddenly, she turned her head. "This will be your new guardian, Alex."

Startled, Agent Barkwell turned sharply to look at who she was talking to.

A teenage boy stared expressionlessly back at him, gaze far too assessing for someone of his age. His posture was loose, confident, his hands swinging casually at his sides. How hadn't he noticed the kid in the room?

There was something wrong with this kid.

Unease stirred anxiously in him, his instincts whining like a distressed dog.

Something told him that this mission wasn't going to go just as easy as he had first thought.

"Agent Barkwell." The teen nodded swiftly.

"Rider." He said in a calloused reply.

Mrs Jones, who had been watching, softly clapped her hands together. "And now that you've been introduced-"

_ Hardly an introduction, _Agent Barkwell thought bitterly, glancing at the boy who stood still, eyes still on him warily.

"-this will be our goodbye." Her eyes moved to Agent Barkwell, and hadn't he known the whispers and seen Mrs Jones, he would've mistaken the brief look in her eyes for harsh maternal instinct. But as it was, he did know the whispers and the woman- so it obviously wasn't. "I expect you to protect Alex." She ignored the snort from the teenager. "And I'd like to see you now. Alex, wait outside."

"Don't bother." He said coolly. "If all you're going to do is talk about me, you may as well do it in my company." So saying, he dropped down into the chair and folded his arms resolutely, gazing simply at Mrs Jones. "Well, go on." He flapped a rude hand at her.

"This doesn't require your opinion, Alex." She said; voice brittle.

"Neither does this, _Mrs Jones_." He said quietly.

Agent Barkwell swallowed, wondering if he needed to use his new 'guardianship' now. "We won't be long, Alex." He tried, keeping his voice as gentle as it could go- it wasn't much. It just made him sound slightly strangled and stiff.

Those cold eyes swept onto him, and he had to actually force himself not to shiver under the _deadness _of the stare. His throat bobbed nervously, and unconsciously, he took a tiny step back, frustration growing when he saw the small twitch of the teenager's lips as he spotted the action.

"Alex, this is an order- _stand outside_." Her voice had switched from lightly open to metallic. The tone offered no chance for disagreement.

Alex stood up sharply, stalking towards the door. "There's not much you need to know." He said as he went, eyes fixed on Agent Barkwell. "Don't expect me to play nice- because I don't want to be here. Don't expect me to play happy families- because I don't _need _one, and _don't _expect me to believe that you care about me- because you don't!" he was by the door now, voice still steady and controlled, but growing more and more concentrated as he went.

"We'll contact you later, Alex." Mrs Jones said, silencing Agent Barkwell's obvious want to retaliate with something snarky.

Turning, the teen made to pull the door open.

"And, Alex?" Mr Blunt was finally speaking, Agent Barkwell standing even more to attention.

He paused by the doorway.

"Leave your gun."

_Gun? What on earth-? _Agent Barwell watched in confusion as the kid tightened his jaw minutely before he roughly drew out a gun from the waistband of his jeans and threw it on the floor, shutting the door behind him.

Dazedly, Agent Barkwell stared at the gleaming weapon on the floor.

His eyes tore from it at the sound of a dry chuckle.

Mr Blunt…had he just …_laughed?_

Those stone grey eyes swivelled onto him, pinning him much like a cat would a mouse. "An amusing child, I'm sure." Suddenly, that wrong emotion drained from his eyes. "I expect you to be able to handle him." His assessment of his agent was slow and methodical, showing Anthony quite clearly that he could hide nothing from this man.

"Of course, sir."

But Mr Blunt wasn't listening anymore; he had gone back to checking over the files on his desk- acting as if the man wasn't even there.

"Very good, Agent." Mrs Jones applauded instead. It was disconcerting; the sudden changes in conversation, and Lewis Barkwell began to wonder whether it was designed to throw the poor victims off track. "We will, of course, be expecting regular updates on his status, and to call us as soon as you notice anything…off about the boy."

He swallowed, eyes moving down quickly to look at those dark eyes of hers. "Is there anything I should be aware of? The file didn't say much…" he trailed off- scared to go on lest it sounded like he was complaining about the scantiness of the folder holding the mission directives he'd been issued with. The pause before the word '"off"' had also worried him quite a bit. What was _that _supposed to mean?

She smiled secretively, as if she knew what was worrying him. She probably did, he reasoned uncomfortably. "We realise that. There isn't anything else you should know. Though be careful; he has been known to make escape attempts at times. We need him to stay with you to protect him from the people who could hurt him- but he doesn't seem to realise that." She mused. "He also has quite a dislike for being 'babysat', so be careful in how you treat him. We'll be expecting to see him soon, so make sure he stays out of as much trouble as possible before then. Do you have any more questions?"

_Yes! _He cried inside, struggling to absorb all of what he'd been told. _Why am I looking after him? Where are his parents? What do you _mean _'"be careful"'? What's _wrong _with him, anyway? What am I protecting him from? This isn't indefinite, right? _"No, ma'am." He said stiffly.

She nodded, satisfied. "Good. There are to be no promises of secrecy. If he tells you something- then we want to know- promised silence or not." She looked at him stonily. "There are no such as promises in this business."

Of course he knew that. He didn't need to be reminded. And yet, the words still made him feel agitated. This was a _child_. What could he possibly know that would make them so antsy? "Of course, ma'am."

"Then you are dismissed." Again, disconcertingly, Blunt spoke, looking up from his folder. "You know where you'll be living from now on."

"Of course, sir." He answered quickly, as if he was being tested.

He stood a while, realised that that was actually his dismissal, and quickly gave his thanks and left, ears burning in embarrassment.

Shutting the door as softly as he could behind him, he let out a relieved sigh once in the safety of the softly lit corridor.

"Find out much?"

Calming his suddenly fast heartbeat, he forced himself to turn causally to the teen, who stood leaning against the wall, eyes trained on his face.

"Not really." He shrugged. "But that's what it's like in this business." He said, keeping his voice light and unthreatening. But how did he _do _that? Just disappear from his senses? It was frustrating and unnerving. He was a highly trained spy! Kids shouldn't be able to startle him!

The kid hummed in vague agreement and straightened up. "So?"

The agent pulled out his new keys and rattled them. "Home."

Alex twitched.

Home.

_ " Ian? Where are you?" Empty halls, childish voices echoing. Another game of hide and seek?_

_ "Oh, Alex…what have they done to you this time?" soft and warm, tickling red hair and steady arms._

_"You will answer 'sir' when I speak to you, boy! Do you understand?" harsh, loud._

_"Your father would be proud to see you now." A velvet voice, pressing metal into his hand. "Do you understand?"_

_"Alex, why are you standing in the doorway? Come in before someone thinks you're doing something shifty!" laughing eyes, dark hair._

"Alex?"

Blinking, he gazed blankly at Agent Barkwell who was staring at him in slight unease. "I'm fine." He said mechanically.

Doubtfully, he rocked back onto his heels, fingers flicking at his sides in restless movement. "Well…Ok, then. Let's go."

When the agent had turned to lead the way through the corridors that Alex knew too well, but supposed he should act like he didn't, he took a deep breath, hardening his emotions, mentally burying them just like Scorpia had told him to all those months ago. Or was it years? Or decades? Shaking his head, he followed the man- his new _guardian._

Ha. Yeah right.

* * *

"Well, here we are." Awkwardly, Anthony swept one arm around him, gesturing the house with a hesitant theatrical. "Your new home."

Alex stood in the hallway, his eyes sweeping over the space easily, lingering on places like the windows or doors- scanning for escape routes or weaknesses in the defences of the house. That window looked decidedly easy to open…

Anthony shifted to get the boys attention, struggling to hide a flinch as the gaze suddenly snapped onto him. Feeling the odd need to raise his hands passively, he tried for a relaxing smile, though, seeing the narrow of those acorn brown eyes, he knew it hadn't worked. "Your room's upstairs on the far left." He hesitated, unsure how to go about this. _Consider it a mission, play-acting as a father and child. _His expression changed, eyes losing their tension. _This _he could deal with. A mission. Not looking after some mysterious, bratty teen. "Would you like something to eat?"

"I'm not hungry." Was the brusque reply. "I think I'll just go to bed." He stooped down to pick up the two bags, Anthony missing the way his fingers tugged at the material of his sleeves to hold down as he did so.

"OK, then. Get a good sleep." He smiled at him 'kindly'.

Coldly, Alex glared at him. "You don't need to pretend." He sounded quietly angry. "I don't want to be here, you don't want to be here, and that suits me fine."

The smile strained. "Good night, Alex."

It wasn't storming- from the miniscule amount of time Anthony had spent with the child, he knew that Alex did just not 'storm'. It was a more panther like movement- swift, brutal and obviously displeased. Anthony waited until he heard the upstairs door _not-slam_ shut. Alex didn't slam doors. He just shut them with enough power to show his anger, but too little to even relate to him having a tantrum.

It was just weird.

Tired, he flung himself down into the barstool by his- no, he corrected firmly, _their, _new kitchen diner. Absently, he pulled a finger across the glossy black table top. It was a nice house, he thought, glancing around the room. It looked cosy, warm and all in all inviting.

Except, of course, it was fake.

All designed to disarm and to confuse.

Opening up the cupboards to see it already filled up with food, he spotted a glass and some beer in the fridge after investigating, and poured himself a good one- never one to drink straight from the bottle. Raising the glass with no little amount of dry humour, he cheered alone to his new happy family.

He took a swig.

Funny.

Upstairs, Alex had kicked his bag under his bed, not needing much as he had been promised the rest of his things at a later date.

He wasn't going to stay around long enough for that.

His eyes hardened, staring at his loosely and scarred hands in his lap. If they thought that he was going to sit around like an obedient puppy, waiting for MI6 to call him, then they were wrong. "Keep fighting, right, Jack?" he whispered, voice too loud in the darkness. It didn't sound like it belonged to him.

Jack would've wanted him to keep resisting.

Jack would've wanted him to never give in.

Jack would've wanted-

Jack would've wanted-

He closed his eyes tight.

He shouldn't be doing this. Jack was _dead. Gone. A burst of flames, screaming, fire so much fire- where was she? Where- where's Jack? Was she- was she-_

Gasping, he tore himself from the thoughts, standing up sharply; eye's scanning the room with a wild intensity.

Silence stared back.

Forcing himself to relax, to _let go, _he loosened his taut muscles, and softened his tight expression into one an unsuspecting teen should wear. Sitting down on his bed with forced carelessness, he set to planning how he was going to get away from this place.

He could hear the agent moving about downstairs, heard the fridge door opening and closing, heard the clink of a glass. _He's drinking. _Alex thought, eyes half closed. _Beer. Doesn't seem the type of person to go for anything too heavy like Vodka or any other strong spirits. Won't be wine, wine's not kept in the fridge. _He stored that information away. All information is important information, his uncle Ian used to say.

Except he didn't want to think about Ian.

_But it always comes back to him, doesn't it? It's always about Ian, isn't it? Just like what happened in America. Even that was to do with Ian, wasn't it? _That little voice in his voice whispered, laughing at him- a constant reminder of things he didn't want to hear.

Ignoring the voice, he ran a hand through his blond hair, thinking furiously on how he was going to escape.

Shaking his head angrily, he moved to change into his pyjamas. He needed sleep; he was still jetlagged from his flight back from America, and that nasty run in with that group…

His eyes grew sharp at the thought of it.

How had they known where he was going anyway?

The shirt dropped back down over his torso.

It was meant to be a new start, a new him.

America- the land of dreams.

How had they stepped into his new world?

Why wouldn't they just _leave him alone?_

Gritting his teeth, he clawed at his chest- just above where the bullet scar was. It ached.

_Blood. So much blood. _

_ Was he breathing?_

_ Yes, was breathing._

_ And there she was, screaming, sobbing; dark hair stuck to her wet face, body heaving with each anguished cry. Why? Why? Why why whywhywhy?_

_ And it was _his _fault all his fault and she was telling him so, she was attacking him, snot on her face, eyes blurred with tears, ragged screeches tearing from her lungs and she looked so- wild._

_ And he had made her that way._

"Stop it." He snapped forcefully into the darkness.

The thoughts silenced.

Sighing, dragging a hand over his face, he closed his eyes wearily, resigning himself to sleep, not bothering to change or brush his teeth- that could wait.

He was just so _tired. _

Too much had happened in the last few days.

Too many things he needed to sort out.

MI6 _owned him._

The thought made him boil-livid.

But they couldn't own him. They wouldn't. People had tried. They had tried to own him. General Sarov, Scorpia, MI6, even the Pleasure's to a degree. But they didn't. None of them did. And now this _Agent Barkwell _thought he could own him. Fine. Let him believe that. Alex smiled in the comforting darkness of his room, aware that the two words clashed, but at the moment doing nothing to adjust that awkward view. He would leave soon. His fingers clenched around the mattress, pulling himself into bed. He _had _to leave soon. They couldn't have him, but _they _couldn't find him, too.

His eyes closed with none of the restfulness that sleep should bring.

The memories of the last few days kept him awake, that, and the usual but unwelcome fear that he'd be sent on a mission soon. Blunt's eyes had said it all. They _wanted _him. They were going to ship him off somewhere soon, somewhere where he'd have to fight against mad men or women, escape, be tortured, watch people die, _make _people die. Eyes staring into the darkness he held back a shudder. Well, that just meant he had to escape faster.

MI6 didn't know _all _of what had happened in America. He hadn't told them everything, just like Ian had told him not to, some childish voice whispered hopefully in him. So he was certain that the Intelligence agency didn't fully know what they were dealing with.

Hell, even _he _didn't know what he was dealing with.

And it terrified him.

Shifting in the sheets, he buried his face in the crook of his heavily scarred arm.

Tomorrow, everything would begin. No one could hold him down.

No, he wasn't _scared. _

He was just…ready.

Ready to fight.

* * *

AN- Reviews, anyone? Constructive criticism is welcome (-:


	2. Chapter 2

AN**-Woah...that was weird. Something happened that made everything disappear...oh well. Anyway! Thank you my lovelies! (second time typing this) Your reviews were truly encouraging! For those of you who didn't review, thank you for reading! But, maybe you could leave me a word later...*smiles hopefully*. Ah, yes, one of my beautiful reviewers asked me whether this would be a suicidal fic. For any of you who too are asking themselves the same question, the answer is N. O. I'm afraid I'm not too keen on that, and I'm a little hesitant to write something so delicate. I don't want to offend. But, yeah! Chapter 2 is UP! I should actually be doing homework...oops. Oh well! Enjoy! If you don't hear from me soon, it's because my English has holed me up with a Shakespeare play and is currently beating me with it. Hm. Enjoy!**

**Chapter 2-**

"No, he's not done anything…no…no, I understand…no, he hasn't tried to run or anything, I think he's actually settling down…yes, you're right…OK, bye." With a sigh, Anthony clicked the phone back into place, staring at it.

"What's up?"

He barely twitched at the voice, having known Alex was sat there even through his discussion on the phone. All those times of him practically disappearing on him must have just been coincidences, Agent Barkwell thought, nodding at the realisation. Alex had been painfully easy to spot throughout the week he'd been with him.

Turning with a forced smile on his face, he shook his head minutely, fingers tapping against the work surface as Alex peered back curiously. "Nothing, just work." He kept his voice as light as possible.

The kid tilted his head to the side inquisitively, and then shrugged, eyes going back to whatever he was doing in the first place, leaving his back _very_ unguarded, Agent Barkwell noticed critically before silencing the thought. _He's a kid, Anthony, not an agent like you. He shouldn't _have _to be glancing over his shoulder every five seconds._

But it was odd, he couldn't help but hesitantly think as he sat down on the sofa opposite Alex, swirling the glass of orange juice in his hand vacantly as he watched his new ward. The kid seemed…normal.

_No, not that. _He shook his head irately, taking a quick sip of the drink. It wasn't that.

The first time he'd laid eyes on Alex, he had seen a mystery, an enigma. The boy had had a _gun; _he'd been able to disappear out of his senses and had seemed cold and almost…deadly. But now, there he was sitting on the sofa and idly playing games on his DS without a care in the world, legs crossed comfortably beneath him and eyes flickering as they followed the characters on the screen- Mario and Luigi if he had heard the chiming tune right.

Pressing the glass thoughtfully against his lips, he kept on examining Alex subtly. He had to admit, the thought of doing this, looking after this kid had alarmed him at first, made him ask himself what he'd gotten himself into, looking after such a hard and brittle- he would go as far as to say _dangerous _kid. But now he saw that really, he didn't have anything to worry about.

Alex was ordinary.

He hadn't made any escape attempts yet, and Anthony could see in the boy's eyes that he was comfortable with where he was. Closing his eyes briefly, Anthony remembered the first full day he'd spent with Alex…

_Glancing sharply at the clock, Anthony stared at the breakfast he had made on the table. _

_It was 10 o'clock. Why wasn't Alex up yet? Had he ran?_

No, Anthony, _he soothed himself, forcing a forkful of beans and sausage into his tight mouth. _You checked on him, remember? He was still in bed when you got up. He's a teenager; most teenagers like to lie in as late as possible.

_Though that smooth reasoning calmed his agitated nerves for a moment, Anthony couldn't help the flickers of doubt. Alex didn't seem _normal. _And who knew what abnormal teenagers got up to? Maybe he should go and check again…_

_No need. The sound of clumsy and sleepy footsteps alerted him to his charge stumbling down the stairs, rubbing at his face and dressed scruffily in his clothes, the same as yesterday. Had he slept in them?_

_Screwing up his eyes in the bright light of the morning lit kitchen, he muttered grumpily to himself and slid into the chair next to Anthony, a movement that both surprised Anthony and made him suspicious. The kid had made it pretty clear the other night that he wanted nothing to do with him. So why had he chosen the seat directly next to Anthony's?_

_Swallowing the harsh comment that almost burst from his lips, he pushed the plate of food in front of Alex and gave him a warm smile. "Eat up."_

_Blearily, Alex blinked at the Full English breakfast in front of him, muttered a subdued thanks and ate tiredly, face almost dropping into his food on multiple occasions._

_Amused, Anthony watched him for a while before resuming his meal._

_They ate in silence, but one that wasn't hostile. Anthony felt all the preparation for a conflict leave him and he relaxed. Truthfully, he'd been expecting the cold shoulder, sharp comments and maybe an escape attempt before the morning was up. But all he had received was a half asleep teenager who was obviously in no state to run anywhere._

_"Up all night?" he tried for a joke, finishing his food._

_Alex stared at him confusedly for a while before smiling tentatively, poking at his bacon. "You could say that."_

_An awkward silence passed, Alex seemingly content at playing with the remainders of his food, and Anthony desperate to fill the rubber-band silence. He'd never been great with quiet._

_"So, erm, Mrs Jones said that you could go back to school after a few weeks, get you settled down again." He swallowed, looking everywhere but Alex. "And, um, if you want to tell me anything," limply, he held his arms open, finally looking at Alex who gazed back with something akin to gratitude in his eyes. "I'm here to listen."_

_The boy looked down quickly, his shoulders hunching, hair covering his eyes. And was that a _blush _he spotted on his face?_

_Anthony had to remember to mask his shock as Alex spoke, melting his expression into one of gentle concern. _

_"Thank you. I just-" the teen passed a hand over his face, turning away slightly, seeming to curl more into himself. "It's just," he tried again, fumbling with his words, nothing like he had last night. "It's a lot, you know? I'm sorry if I wasn't...nice, last night. It's just-I mean- it wasn't meant-" taking a deep and slightly shaky breath, Alex turned to him, hope shining dimly in those now much softer brown eyes of his. "You understand, right?"_

No, not really. _"Yeah, you've had a lot of changes in the past few days. You don't need to worry about it, I probably would've acted the same." He lied softly, pressing a hand against the boy's firm shoulder. He seemed so fragile at that moment, like he could shatter and splinter into a thousand pieces at the wrong breath or touch. "Do you mind me asking what you're here for?" it was a direct and blatant breaking of any MI6 rule that told them you _were not _to question the witness (or whatever he was) without consent from the headquarters. But his curiosity overpowered that fact at the moment. He could deal with his overwhelming guilt later._

_For a moment, that same frozenness slipped back into the boy's eyes before it disappeared, melting back into soft and harmless chocolate- leaving Anthony blinking an wondering whether or not he had just imagined it. "They didn't tell you?"_

_Mutely, he shook his head, imagining that words would make the child clam up. _

_"I- I got involved with the wrong people. I didn't _do _anything!" he snapped, seeing the look that washed across Anthony's face. Placating, he held up both hands, indicating that he should carry on. Glaring childishly at the plate in front of him, Alex folded his arms, speaking in an almost sulky voice. "They came after me and- and Mrs Jones told me I'd seen something that I shouldn't, so they want to-to-" visibly struggling to reign in his terror, he swallowed, speaking in a hoarse whisper, eyes haunted. "They want to _kill _me." Empty eyes stared at the table in front of him, he looked horrified._

_Grimly, Anthony patted the kid on the shoulder reassuringly. And horrified he should be. This was a fifteen year old. What fifteen year old should ever have to deal with people going after them with the intent to kill? Shaking his head with an amount of disgust, he tried to comfort the kid, hoping his words weren't as awkward and as wooden as they sounded in his ears._

_"Thanks, I'm fine now… thanks." Alex shrugged off the hand in embarrassment, head turned the other way._

_Anthony had to smother a laugh at the bashfulness of his ward and instead sobered again, remembering something else that had bothered him about the boy. "Where did you get that gun from, Alex?"_

_Blankly, Alex gazed at him, before realisation dawned in his eyes. He drew himself up imperiously. "They were going to kill me!" he said loudly, eyes burning in frightened rage. "I needed to protect myself! One of them dropped it when the police came so I took it!" then, glancing at him meekly, he lowered himself a bit. "Just…don't tell mum or dad. They'd freak."_

_He had to laugh at that. Relief flooded through him. He was just a frightened kid, driven to dangerous things through his terror. Eyes shining, he nodded with a grin. "I won't," he rebuked, waving a finger at him, Alex watching wide eyed. "But you have to make sure you don't go picking up guns from now on. Protecting you is my job."_

_The kid looked so pathetically grateful that sympathy washed through him._

_It wasn't fair, a kid separated from his family like that, chased by some unknown hoodlums. No fifteen year-old should have to have that crippling experience._

"Damn."

Anthony looked up at the hiss, woken out of his musings.

Alex glanced at him apologetically. "I lost." He offered, gesturing to the game in his hands with a little tilt of his chin.

Grinning, Anthony stretched himself out in the sofa, blinking in the lights.

The kid was ordinary.

MI6 obviously had their ideas about this kid all wrong.

"Hey, are you bored?" he found himself asking, scratching lazily at his leg.

"Not really," came the slow reply. "Why?"

He shrugged, twisting his head to the side to look at him. "Just wondering whether you'd like to go out to the park or something. You _have _been cooped up inside for a whole week. I thought teenagers had energy to burn."

"I thought we weren't allowed outside." He sounded embarrassed. "You know, just in case something happens…"

Snorting, he swung himself off of the sofa and wrinkled the bridge of his nose in a playful grin. "Nothing's going to happen, Al, you've got me to watch your back." He smiled back encouragingly at Alex's hesitant curve of the lips. "Right, get ready- I'm going to go and get my coat and shoes."

"OK."

He took off up the stairs, humming the Mario theme tune under his breath as he went.

"Al?" Alex frowned. When had the last time that someone called him Al, been?

Shaking his head, he stood up stiffly, slowly stretching out his limbs.

Not long enough, it seemed.

Hard eyes scanned the room again.

Acting like a careless teenager sure was tiring.

He didn't know how they did it.

_"It's a matter of patience, Alex. The bear has to wait for precisely the right moment before he catches the fish. The longer he stands still, the less of a threat it will seem until finally- it can attack. Do you understand, Alex?" stern eyes turned to the boy crouching silently in the shrubbery next to him._

"Yes, Ian." He murmured to himself absently as he tugged on his trainers.

He just needed to lower this agents guard, keep him unwary and therefore unready. Then- and only then- could he make his move.

_But you need to move soon. Who _knows _when _they'll_ find out that you're not where they left you anymore? _A voice whispered anxiously, tugging at his already tight nerves.

He didn't _like _pretending that he was an ordinary teen. It kept him on edge.

Normal teens didn't check their food before eating, normal teens didn't break a person's arm when said person got up behind them; normal teens didn't figure out what the closest weapon would be if a fight suddenly appeared. Having to announce his presence everywhere he went was becoming tedious and straining on his nerves, as was having to pretend that he hadn't noticed Agent Barkwell watching him or the 'secret' phone calls in the middle of the night.

It was draining, it was tiring, and it was going against everything he'd been brought up with.

Anthony appeared at the bottom of the stairs, and Alex forcibly loosened his spine, slouching slightly and digging his hands into his pockets when he liked to have them out, ready for anything. Forcing a smile, he kept his eyes as unthreatening as possible.

Anthony beamed at him. "Ready?OK! Let's go!"

* * *

This was harder than he had anticipated.

"Do you want an ice cream or anything, Al?"

He had to stop himself from snapping that _no, he did not want an icecream! _And _didn't he realise how many calories those things had? _Instead, he smiled disarmingly. "No, I'm fine, thanks."

Agent Barkwell shrugged. "More for me then!"

_That doesn't even make _sense! _If you said '_less money to spend then' _instead, _then _that would work! _Alex took a deep breath, looking around him in forced casualness and ignoring his tense thoughts. He had to calm down. He was too wound up.

There were too many people- all potential threats.

"Alex? Is…is that you?"

Turning sharply, hands out of his pockets, Alex faced the speaker.

Ryan.

A school "friend".

Staring at him, mouth slightly open, a football clutched underneath one arm, Alex wondered bitterly on how little someone could change. "What- what are _you _doing back? I thought- I mean, we all thought you'd gone to America !" his voice was high pitched in disbelief.

America.

_Blood and shouts and- they were catching up! They were catching up! They were going to grab him and hurt him and never let him go-never- never let him go! But they had something that belonged to him, something that-_

Alex shrugged, smiling softly. "It didn't quite go as expected."

"Oh." Ryan's mouth flapped for a while, at a loss of words.

Alex stared back. Ryan and he had never been particularly close. They had spoken on occasions, small and civil talk that was meaningless now, something that faded to a grey background in Alex's new, sharper life. Pointless. He didn't look threatening, his posture was all wrong for him to suddenly attack him, Alex recognised severely, eyes scanning over him.

_Not a threat._

His posture loosened significantly, eyes softer, though he did remain guarded; keeping a constant eye out for any other threats that could appear.

"We-" he cleared his throat self-consciously. "-we missed you, you know."

Alex quirked one eyebrow.

He seemed to hesitate, realising that Alex didn't believe him and so added in a hasty after thought. "Tom especially."

He nodded silently, ignoring Ryan's fidgeting and shuffling on the grass. Tom. A…friend.

_Define 'friend', Alex. _Some voice spoke bitterly, making him twitch. _A 'friend' is a temporary convenience, an all in all larger inconvenience in the grander scheme of things. Friends take parts of you; friends can be used against you. You _know _that, Alex. People who get close to you only get hurt._

Scowling to himself, Alex shrugged off the thoughts. "Is he OK?" he asked instead. He couldn't be dealing with his paranoia having a hissy fit in the middle of a park.

Ryan nodded awkwardly, kicking at the grass, _mentally wishing that he hadn't come to say hello, _Alex noticed with vague amusement, noting the way his feet pointed in the other direction, a subconscious sign that he wanted to leave. "Yeah, his parents are…you know. I think they've finally divorced, his older brother, Jerry- cool guy, him- has come over, they're sharing a flat till things cool down." His mouth struggled into a smile eyes darting everywhere but at the cool eyed boy stood in front of him. What did girls _see _in him? He was scary!

"Right. That's good." It was. Tom deserved some peace in his life.

"Are you, you know, coming back to school soon?"

Alex had to smile at the curiosity in Ryan's eyes. He'd tried to keep his voice casual, but Alex just knew that he was dying to know, to run off and tell everyone. "Maybe," he said, purposely vague. "My new guardian says that he wants me to settle down a bit first."

"'New guardian'?" Ryan repeated.

Alex stared at him coldly for a moment, wondering whether Ryan was trying to get under his skin.

"I was just asking, man." Ryan blurted out, unnerved by the silent rage in his eyes.

_He was just asking. _The look subsided; he relaxed his harsh and defensive posture. For a while he stood confused, before replying dazedly. "Yeah, new guardian." Why hadn't they been told?

Ryan, still frightened by the look he had been given decided to take that chance to go. "Sorry, I've got to go- my friends are waiting to play football with me. See you later, yeah?" the look in his eyes said the opposite.

Nodding, Alex watched him go wistfully, choosing not to mention that he obviously wasn't going to play football as he already had played- grass stains on his knees and mud on his shirt and shoes the biggest giveaway, not to mention the dampness of his skin and generally heavier than normal breathing.

How nice it must be too be so oblivious.

"Who was that?" Anthony reappeared, licking on a chocolate ice cream, glancing curiously at Alex who stood staring vacantly ahead.

"Friend." He said bluntly, still staring at that empty place in front of him.

"Oh," he glanced at Alex doubtfully. "Ok."

Alex shrugged again, moving off as Anthony walked; too busy licking his ice cream to begin or keep any form of conversation going.

That suited Alex fine.

Eyes flickering to a man cutting a hedge, Alex swung his arms by his sides methodically, comfortingly, watching the movement of the sharp hedge pruners until Anthony nudged him and told him to stop scaring the man, who by that time had stopped cutting the hedge and was hugging the pruning shears close to him, eyes bright with nerves.

Forcing his eyes away from the man and his potential weapon, Alex found his thoughts drifting back to that unexpected meeting with Ryan.

The brief encounter had unnerved him.

His eyes narrowed, jaw clenching.

Why hadn't they been told that Jack was gone?

He didn't like it.

So much had happened in America, and to just come back to England and see everything so…normal, so ordinary, it frightened him. Time hadn't jerked and sped up here as it had for Alex. Everything was in its place, untouched, the same- sterling silver in the sunlight. Breathe, and life goes on with no thought for him or his new and rusty life. Nothing had changed.

Nothing had…changed?

Trills of uneasy excitement ran down his body.

He worked on steadying his suddenly rapid breaths, calming his fluttering heart and flickering eyes. And if nothing had changed here…then…

Then-then maybe Jack was waiting for him in their house, frying scrambled eggs and humming some old tune that he never knew the name of. Maybe she was glaring at the clock and muttering curses to MI6 like she had used to, just waiting for him to step through the door and-and-

"Alex? You're going the wrong way."

_No, _he _wasn't _going the wrong way, he almost snapped. Couldn't he see? Jack was waiting for him, just waiting for him to go home so _why couldn't he let him go?_

"Al? You OK? You're looking a little flushed." Anthony stooped down to examine Alex's face. The teen looked dazed, was looking through him rather than at him. "Al?"

_Wake up, you idiot!_

Anthony frowned as Alex visibly shook himself before looking up coolly at the agent. "I'm fine," he recited, turning away from the direction that he had been heading. "Let's go."

The agent hesitated, rolling up the napkin he'd just been using to wipe his sticky mouth and fingers. "If you're getting tired, we can go back." He offered, holding Alex's arm to keep him from moving off. The kid was worrying him.

He choked back a hysterical laugh. If he was _tired!_ Like he hadn't walked distances before with nothing but the clothes on his backs and enemies shooting at him for company!"Fine, OK." He shook the arm off of his own, snapping at his instincts to _shut up_- he could hardly attack the man for touching him. He pulled an irate hand down his face, pinching the bridge of his nose. That loss of control was unprofessional. "I just-" he sighed, back into his bewildered teen persona. "Let's go home." He managed to get out.

Home.

The word tasted sour in his mouth.

Anthony got through the door first, Alex following wearily behind.

"Who left this here?" Anthony said in surprise, somewhere in front of him, holding what looked like a bouquet of-

Immediately, Alex straightened, all tiredness gone. He pushed himself through the entrance, forcing Anthony to _hurry up and show him what it was._

"Flowers. Look pretty expensive to me." Anthony explained as Alex looked over his shoulder at them. He held them closer for Alex to examine. "Pretty, right?"

Alex could only stare in growing horror at the bouquet of red Begonia flowers- fifteen of them.

Red.

He stood in the doorway, frozen.

_A chiming voice in the darkness, staring eyes and whispers. "What colour suits you best, child? Blue? Yellow? Purple?" the voice mused- almost singing._

_ Hands trailing down his recently bruised cheek, forcing himself not to buck away from the whispering and almost friendly voice._

_"No," thoughtful, fingers pressing half healed cuts. "None of those colours. Red, I think, my child. Shall I bathe you in red?"_

"Alex?"

He ignored the voice, staring at the flowers. Red meant danger. Begonias were Victorian flower speak for a warning.

They knew where he was.

He had to move.

_Now._

"A secret admirer, perhaps?" Anthony mused.

_If only. _"I'm going to go and get out of these clothes, maybe sleep for a while."

Anthony nodded at him. From all the time he'd spent with Alex, he realised the kid was fond of sleeping and doing nothing. "Alright, then. Dinner'll be ready at 5."

"Ok." He sounded distracted,_ probably tired from the walk_, Agent Barkwell reasoned as he watched the teen disappear noisily up the stairs. He frowned. He'd have to have a word to Alex about all the noise he made. If they ever needed to remain silent during some kind of attack then they couldn't afford to have him moving about the place like an elephant missing a leg.

Upstairs, Alex pressed his head up against the frame of his door, allowing himself a hidden and momentary show of weakness.

He was running, again.

_No, _he corrected, standing up and losing his tired expression. _I'm fighting._

Turning, he grabbed up what little he would need. He'd have to travel light.

In the end, he filled his spare small rucksack with a few pairs of shirts, underwear and his phone and keys to get into his house back in Chelsea. In there he could get water and food and his spare passport ("In case of emergencies" Ian had said ominously whilst locking it and some other documents away in some secret place). He paused at that thought, fingers hesitating to pull the zip on his bag closed. That reminded him of all of those files that he used to get in trouble for peeking at when he was younger. Would they still be there?

Were they needed?

"_Every secret is an important secret, Alex."_

He nodded.

Promising himself to look when he got back, Alex took a deep breath and swung the bag over his shoulders, face tight. Turning to the window, Alex hefted it open and slid through. The drop was sheer, but nothing he couldn't manage.

Steeling himself- Alex made his way as quietly as possible out of the window and onto the thin window ledge, spying the thing he would jump on to get down.

All the times Anthony had sent him to put the rubbish outside had finally come in useful. Curling his lip and not wasting time hesitating, Alex jumped into the pile of rubbish that he'd gradually built up just outside his bedroom window- well out of sight of any nosy neighbours or Anthony if he ever decided to watch him.

The rubbish cushioned his fall, and Alex scrambled out, nursing only minor bruises and scrapes as he slipped away and out into the street, keeping his hood up and shoulders hunched.

* * *

"He's been too quiet recently."

Mrs Jones looked up at Mr Blunt who stood by his window, staring out into the vast hubbub of London.

"Alex?" she questioned, fingers pausing from their tapping on the computer keyboard to glance up at her superior briefly.

He didn't bother to reply to her question- the answer was obvious. Who else would it be? "No escape attempts, no calls to anyone." He ticked off monotonously; the tone would've been mistaken for boredom if a stranger was listening in. But Mrs Jones heard thoughtfulness, a calm calculation in his dry voice and the dull tap of his fingers against the windowpane.

"He received a bunch of flowers today- at precisely 4:17 pm." Mrs Jones reeled off, fingers tapping onto the desk.

Mr Blunt paused, eyes lingering on a busy pigeon outside the window. "What species?"

"Red Borgia, 15 in total." Mrs Jones reeled off automatically.

Mr Blunt's fingers stopped tapping. A look flashed over his face. "A warning." He muttered, and then straightened up, voice becoming brisk. "Tell our urban-field agents to move out; cover the tubes and bus stations." His voice was little more than a business like clip.

Mrs Jones picked up the phone and glanced at Mr Blunt questioningly, fingers hovering over the buttons. "You expect him to run?" it was more of a statement than a question, but protocol denied her the right of placing words in her boss' mouth.

He trailed his fingers across the windowpane, resuming the pointless but purposeful movement, watching sharply as the same particularly bold pigeon crept closer to the window where he was stood. "Yes. He'll run." A fact. "And that's what whoever spooked him will know."

Mrs Jones tapped the phone gently against one wrist. "Do you not think Alex will know that too?" This time, a real question, one she already knew the answer to. But again, protocol and all that.

He spoke simply. "Yes. Alex knows. But what interests me is what he's going to do about it." He mused, fingers still tapping.

"You think it's going to be dangerous." She intoned, wishing her voice sounded more concerned than its disinterested tone portrayed.

He swivelled those flat grey eyes onto her, face blank. "This is Alex we're talking about."

She nodded. That was all she needed to know. "Agent Barkwell?"

"Bring him in," he turned back to the window. "And contact our back up guardians. This is going to be an interesting chase."

She nodded, phone already to her ear.

* * *

Alex stared at the house in front of him.

It hadn't changed.

_Thud, thud, thud._

Alex whipped around.

Who was it? Was it-? Were they-?

It was his heartbeat.

Sucking in a calming breath, he pushed his gate open (it still creaked halfway through opening, he couldn't help but notice numbly). He made his way up the steps to his house (still grey, worn, carpeted in fairy thin moss) and slipped the key into his lock (same sound, same feel), breath held, almost expecting someone to come out and scream at him (not Jack, never Jack).

But no one came (where was Jack? Where was Ian?), and the door clicked open, eerily familiar.

He stepped in.

The hall was the same. Untouched.

He couldn't help it.

The word bubbled up out of his chest before he could stop it.

"Jack?"

Expectantly, he paused, poised in the doorway, one hand on the doorframe as he waited for the cheery reply tinged by a hint of worry and anger.

_Small body running towards her, eyes anxious and caring at the same time. She would grab him up, and Alex wouldn't care that she was crushing his bruises and cuts, he would hold her back just as tight- his one life line. His one link to normal life. "Where have you been? I've been worried sick! I thought MI6 had gotten a hold of you!"_

_And he would smile and listen and apologise and soothe her as she dragged him to dinner.  
_

His hands clenched, jaw tightening.

"You idiot." He hissed, shutting the door sharply behind him as well as the door to his memories.

Pointless, painful, _unnecessary _memories.

Shaking off the glass sharp memories, he slid up the stairs, hardening his insides, pretending that the sight of that old matted teddy bear still on the landing didn't make his throat clog up, that the sight of Jack 's door still swung loosely open did not make him choke back a soft sob.

It _didn't_.

Filling his back pack with the essentials was easy. Water, food, the old pocket knife his uncle had given him when he was 11, matches and a small first aid kit full of bandages and antiseptic spray were easy finds- he didn't even need to venture into the haunted place of his old room or Jack's to do so.

Now was the hardest part.

Alex stared at the foreboding door in front of him. It seemed to tower in his vision, leering at him and threatening him.

His hands gripped at the handle of his bag tighter.

He wasn't _meant _to go in there.

It was Ian's.

He'd get in trouble.

_Shut _up_, Alex. _He commanded, and loosened his shoulders, pushing the door open.

The room was bare. He knew it would be, but for some reason, the sight of it still shocked him. Sure, he'd seen the people come and take all of his uncle's things out of this room, but the…nakedness of it still startled him still managed to knock him off guard.

_Now, where would a paranoid MI6 spy hide something important? _Alex wandered about the room, trailing his fingers over the walls and checking the stiches in the curtains, pulling to see if there were any loose bits of carpet on the floor, any cracks or tell-tale patches that didn't belong there.

Sitting back on his heels, he frowned, glancing at his watch. He'd spent a good half hour scouring the empty room, and still, nothing. _Where did you put it, Ian? _He asked the empty room, gazing about him quietly.

Standing up and bouncing on the balls of his feet, Alex peered up.

And stared.

Squinting, he stared harder.

The ceiling was painted white and smooth, but something was off about it- and Alex had learnt to not doubt his senses.

But what was it?

Gliding outside of the room, Alex grabbed a chair from the kitchen and hauled it back upstairs, placing it on the floor in Ian's room and standing on it to reach the ceiling. His fingers brushed against the hard surface, and he stood more on his tiptoes. _Nearly there_…

A sound made him freeze, body stretched out and fingers sweeping the ceiling. He held his breath.

Someone was in his house.

He narrowed his eyes, straining his ears to listen harder.

No, _people _were in his house.

Voices were downstairs, talking rapidly and quietly, their footsteps soft and trained on the marble floor downstairs.

Had they followed him here? Or had they just known where he was going to go?

Neither thought comforted Alex and softly, Alex hopped off of the chair, heart thudding, a familiar and unwelcome tension budding inside of him, that same addictive energy roaring and leaping inside of his stomach. _Calm down, _he needed to _calm down _he ordered himself_. _

Silently picking up his bag, Alex crept carefully to the door, only to have it slam inwards.

Wide eyed, he stared at the loosely dressed man in front of him.

The man gaped back.

Alex's eyes flickered to the gun. "Who are you?" he demanded to the staring man, ignoring the presence of the weapon completely. He looked just like an ordinary thug to Alex- not a challenge. Thugs relied on their intimidation factor rather than their fighting ability.

Recovering from his shock, the man began to shout. "Oi! Mi-"

The man never finished his sentence.

Covering the floor with alarming speed, Alex twisted with one liquid movement, and slammed the heel of his foot into the side of the man's face.

Almost instantly, the man's eyes blurred, and he slumped to the floor- out cold. Too late, Alex realised, cursing softly to himself, he should've taken him out before he could call for help.

"Peter? What's going on?" his friend bounded up the stairs, gun drawn. "What's-" he froze. "-Damn." He hissed, cocking his weapon and readying to fire at the teen stood over his unconscious buddy. "I'm gonna give you-"

Alex slammed the door shut in his face. "No cold callers." He muttered as he turned from the door.

Sprinting to the window, Alex pulled it open.

Except it didn't.

Snarling in panicked anger, he turned sharply as the door was kicked open; the man stood glaring at him.

"Hands up." He snapped, eyes tense. He'd heard about this kid- rumours, something that he had at first expected to be nothing just the whispers of people with too little time on their hands. But now…man, he'd taken out Peter! "Hands. Up." He enunciated, highlighting each word with a sharp movement of his gun. The safety was off.

Very slowly, Alex put his hands up, watching the man closely, face devoid of anything.

Growling, the man paced forward, narrowing his eyes at Alex as he got closer.

It was when he was reaching out, the gun facing Alex's stomach that it happened.

The lights went out.

"The hell-?" the man spluttered as darkness fell over them, looking around wildly. "Keep your hands up!" he screamed. "Keep your-"

He jerked as his hand that was holding the gun was suddenly wrenched. He let out a shriek as the bone in his wrist cracked, the gun gone. Where was he? He backed up, panicked. Where was the little-

"Hands up."

The voice was cold, and before his mind could catch up with him, his hands were up, the hardness of the gun pressing against the back of his head.

"Who are you and what do you want?"

_It's a teen, Michael! A teen! _His mind screamed at him. But that didn't change the fact that the teens voice was so dead, that he could apparently see well in the dark, and that he could break someone's wrist without a second thought. "Michael! Michael Carey! I don't- we were just hired to scare you a bit, you know? We weren't going to- going to _kill _you!" his voice was high pitched.

"Really?"

"Yes! Yes! I promise- I-"

"Who hired you?"

His eyes were wide as they rolled from side to side, trying to catch a glimpse of the kid. "I don't _know! _It was a man- he was- he was tall and had dark hair and-" another thought struck him. "H-how did you turn off the lights?" the man stuttered, clinging onto the small hope that this boy made of metal wouldn't kill him, wouldn't be as cold as to pull the trigger- to pull the trigger and just _end _it.

Even though it was dark, even though he couldn't even see his own hand in front of his face, Michael just _knew _that those frozen eyes were staring at him.

"I didn't."

"Wha-? Then- then- how-?"

"Shh." The boy hissed, pressing the gun harder onto the man's head and ignoring his whimper. "Quiet."

Alex's eyes flashed about the darkness. His fist tightened around the weapon.

Someone else was in the house.

Someone who knew what they were doing.

"This just isn't my day."

* * *

AN-Waaah...I forgot to add so much before posting! Reviews if you can, please!


	3. Chapter 3

AN- **31 pages. 31 PAGES. THIRTY ONE PAGES! OK! I did it cos I love you all! And I enjoyed every torturous minute of it, and I hope you do too! Well, please keep sending me my little nuggets of gold (ie. Reviews). They really do make me so happy to read them. I'm so glad you all have been enjoying my story! It just makes me want to write more and write faster! So…continue to tell me if you like it or not! Seriously! I love hearing your voices! Everyone! Let's sing together!**

**DISCLAIMER- NO! Stop ASKING ME! I don't own it! I don't own any of Anthony Horowitz' characters either!**

* * *

"He _what?!"_

"Calm down, Agent Barkwell. I'm sure you heard well enough."

Anthony stared at Mrs Jones who sat perched on the corner of her desk, the ever-present peppermint rolling and clacking in her mouth as she watched him blandly.

He tried to reign himself in, to tell himself that he was being unprofessional, but he _couldn't._

Alex had _duped _him.

Played him like a fool.

Ha ha ha.

"But-but _how?" _he hated that his voice sounded petulant, like _he _was the child. Like-like it wasn't _fair! _Schooling his face but unable to control the bewildered and angry fire in his eyes, he stared back at Mrs Jones who gazed back patiently, and tried again. "How did he do it?" too late, he realised that _why, did he do it _would be a better question.

Mrs Jones looked like she wanted to smile sympathetically, but she didn't. "He escaped from out of his window. The easiest trick in the book." And now _Mr Blunt _was looking at him, his eyes decidedly cold and- and he was looking at him like he'd- like he'd-

Just been tricked by a _kid._

He cringed.

"Please take a seat, Agent Barwell." Mrs Jones offered, still sucking on that _damn mint._

Tired, he collapsed down into it, pressing a hand into his eyes and muffling a groan- humiliated.

There had been a knock on his door which he had answered. On his doorstep had stood two MI6 operatives gazing at him in boredom. One had even been chewing _gum- _was that even protocol? Then one of them, the one chewing gum (it was _strawberry _flavoured. Seriously?) had gestured at him with that same disinterest in his voice that filled his eyes, and had told him to go with them. Of course, he had said very clearly that no, he had his charge upstairs of whom he was currently in the process of guarding.

The gum one had spoken (mouth open, showing the pink wad) and had said, facial expression never changing: "No, he's not. He escaped through the window into a pile of rubbish."

And now here he was, career _down the drain _because some idiot kid couldn't _sit still _for _ten minutes _can let him do his flipping job!

"Agent Barkwell?"

"I'm sorry," he moaned, forcing himself to look up at Mrs Jones. "I just-" he struggled to hide the shame from his face, sitting upright with a grimace. "It was my _job _to look after him, and I let him get away." This time he lowered his head, staring at his knees. "I really am very sorry."

Mrs Jones smiled softly at the bent head, fingers pressing impatiently into the pile of folders that were on her desk. "Yes," she soothed, knowing that she didn't have time to be calming one operative when another more valuable one was currently on the run. "If it makes you feel any better, you lasted longer than all the other agents we've had him with."

He crawled further into his hole. The kid had been _playing _him. He could've escaped anytime he wanted to, so really, that was no comfort. But, remembering to be courteous, he mumbled an apprehensive thanks, sure that at any moment now Mrs Jones would call him out on the fact that he had nothing to do with the length of time the kid stayed.

"Good. Now, back to business." She pulled out her laptop and placed it on her desk, Mr Blunt watching Anthony with such blank intensity that he began to wish that he would go back to pretending that his agent didn't exist like he had the first time.

Attempting to ignore the close scrutiny without looking rude, he leant politely in to face the laptop screen, and stared at what it held.

Mrs Jones now was watching him seriously, face a blank slate. "Do you have any idea what this is?"

His throat bobbled nervously, eyes flickering uneasily up to her before latching themselves back onto the screen. "No?" his voice squeaked at the end, and he cleared his throat hastily.

"Yes or no, Agent?" she said impatiently.

"No."

She nodded shortly. "And Alex has never spoken of or hinted at knowing what this is?"

He licked his dry lips, shame filling him again. "No." he said quietly.

"Very well." The laptop screen closed.

Agent Barkwell stared at the space where it once was, mind spinning, confused. "But what…what _was _it?" he managed to ask he'd never seen anything so odd, so _complicated _in his life.

Mr Blunt stood up, the gazes of the two people in the room automatically moving to him. The powerful man stared dully back. "What _is _it, you mean, Agent."

"Yes, sir." He said quickly, sitting up to attention, hands stiff in his lap.

Mr Blunt turned slowly to face the window, his hands clasped behind his back. "Your clearance isn't high enough for that, Agent." Was the curt reply.

"Yes sir, sorry for asking sir."

Mrs Jones drummed her fingers against the closed laptop lid to draw his attention back to her.

Smiling thinly at him, she began again. "We have known Alex for a while now, and we know that he doesn't trust people very easily. It was a thin hope that he would open up and tell you something."

_Still a hope thin as it was; still a hope that I failed. _He wearily attempted to shrug the glum thoughts off- he needed a clear head. Frowning and leaning forward, he tried to listen.

Her lips pursed, eyes scanning his face. "We have agents out now searching for him and blocking the exits he may try to use."

"What do you want-" he shut up as she raised a silencing hand.

"We need you to go back to the house with the slight chance that if Alex is pushed, he'll go there."

Anthony hesitated.

As dumb as his actions had been, he wasn't an idiot- he knew they wanted him out of the picture. They thought he was a hindrance. He'd failed, and so now they were calling him off of duty.

"Anthony?"

_Anthony now, is it? Not Agent? _He thought bitterly, struggling not to shout at how it _wasn't his fault _and that they _didn't give him enough information._

They were both watching him.

He looked up and nodded quietly. "OK."

The hard look on Mrs Jones' face evaporated and was replaced by a small smile. "Very good."

* * *

Footsteps moved on the carpet.

Silent.

He'd always been fond of the darkness. Even now, he looked around him in affection, loving the way the blackness just…_purified _everything. No, white didn't purify everything as some literary critics claimed haughtily as they waved about their poems and dry stories of old and dead writers. It was indeed _black _that purified everything. Black, that was dark and smooth, concealing and unforgiving. It was black that could hide and change, turn everything invisible and meaningless.

It was black that he gave to people.

Pure, beautiful, merciful black.

They would thank him, he thought as he swept softly up the stairs, all in black. They would thank him wherever they went. When they realised how beautiful black was, they would turn those once accusing and fearful eyes onto him, now alight with bliss and reverence, and they would say: "_Thank you, thank you for making me clean again! Thank you!" _And some would fall against his feet, some would cry into his presence. Some would weep and call him 'Gentleman', or, as he preferred nowadays, some would call him 'Priest'. _"Thank you, Priest! Thank you!" _

He mimed the words as he pulled out his gun.

Pushing the door open- silent as a shadow- he slid in (quietly, hush, hush, quietly) and softly shut the door behind him (hush, quiet now).

And there he was.

The darkness loved him, soothed him, and gave him the ability to be able to see the shape in the darkness. The darkness loved him, called him, and helped him hide, wrapping its strong arms around him and hiding him from others.

They were one.

The person he had been sent to kill was not loved by the darkness.

His target stood still in the middle of the room, body relaxed into a loose fighter's pose, shoulders back, leg's apart and distributing his weight. The Priest caught sight of a gun clutched in his targets hand and caught sight of the way his targets head snapped from side to side now and then, breaths stifled in the darkness, trying to blend his form into the material of black.

The Priest laughed softly, under his breath, eyes gentle.

He liked to let his targets know when they were going to die.

It was a mercy, to be able to see your death coming.

_A tragedy, _he supposed as he moved forward,(hush, quiet, closer, closer) _that they cannot prevent it._

Purposefully, he ordered the darkness to let him go.

Two brown eyes turned onto him fearfully, mouth opened wide, gun swinging round.

But the Priest was faster, he always was.

The targets body hit the floor, eyes still open, mouth still wide in that one last unspoken cry of defiance and terror.

He stepped back from the pooling blood and lowered his head. _Be at peace. _Gently, he pulled out a single black iris, leaning down to place its fragile form upon the body of his recent victim.

Just as the stem touched the still chest, he paused.

Tilting his head to the side in confusion, he considered the face.

Wasn't the target a meant to be a child?

Movement flashed in the corner of his eye. He danced backward, the flower momentarily forgotten as he had to concentrate on keeping up with the cold and brutal attacks that came from within the folds and creases in the darkness.

Hands moving to block the attacks, the Priest tried to get an attack in- only to have it immediately quenched, and the moves come on harder and faster, giving him no other opportunity to attempt to get a killing blow in.

He frowned, eyes scanning around him as the barrage of silver smooth punches and kicks ended and the figure melted back into the silence.

This child was loved by the darkness too.

Sharp eyes swept across the room.

He smiled slowly, delicately wild.

How…_interesting._

Alex breathed out softly, mimicking the swell and rise of the shadows around him and attempting to ignore the pounding of his own heart. Eyes straining, he trained them upon the man who stood too easily, too casually in the darkness, his own eyes moving across the room with unconcern woven into every fragment of his being.

But the darkness wasn't just his world.

Eyes dropping to the dead body of Michael, a soft stirring of guilt murmured in his ear, telling him that once again it was _his fault, his fault that there were blood and tears and fear and-_

His eyes snapped up as the (assassin? murderer? contract killer?) person turned towards him. He couldn't see him, Alex realised in relief, he just knew the area where Alex was standing- still dangerous.

"The Priest, I take it?" he called, softly moving, his steps shadowy and phantom silent as he attempted to get behind the killer. He had heard about the man, and now, seeing him- or not seeing him- either way, he knew it must be him.

The almost invisible shape didn't make a sound.

Alex's eyes narrowed at the lack of reply, keeping his eyes fixed on his target as he crept through the darkness, eyes burning from the struggle of not losing the figure. It was as if it was melting into the blackness around them. "Who hired you?" he tried again, breathing as low as possible; almost there, heart thudding. He slipped closer to the back of the Priest, arms by his sides, ready.

Not pausing to think, Alex swung one hand down, hoping to catch the figure unawares.

He should've known better.

He muffled a cry, just managing to twist out of the way from a killing blow aimed at his neck- the force enough to snap his neck if it connected. Instead, it struck jarringly against his forearms as they shot up in a hasty block.

Diving down, he lashed out at the assassin's knees only to have him jump out of the way and retaliate with a kick of his own.

Growling in his head, Alex cursed as a blow smacked him in the face, blood filling his mouth as he tried to avoid the almost careless moves, unable to pull out of defence for long enough to retaliate with his own moves.

The tables had turned.

A kick hit him brutally in the side- the first of many- but he was grimly pleased to be able to land a few of his own hits- and, from the hiss that erupted after he leant a particularly nasty one on the man's left ear- they seemed to be quite painful.

It was his silence that got to him the most though.

The efficiency of his movements along with the refusal to give way to speech- any indication that this man was indeed human, that he wasn't- he ducked out of the way of a two fingered killing strike aimed for his eyes- wasn't a _machine._

He was woken out of his thoughts by the sound of a _click._

He cried out as a bullet whizzed past him, burning a trail of red hot lava across his shoulder as it just missed him but scraped across his skin.

He retreated back into the darkness, one hand gripping the bleeding, roaring wound.

Struggling to concentrate with a new haze of pain upon him, he wasn't ready as the man attacked him again, refusing to let him rest.

Panting, seeing an opening and taking it with reckless desperation, he lunged towards the hand holding the gun, crying out as a punch landed on his chin, making his eyes blur and causing the grip he had on the gun loosen. The hand pulled free and cracked him over the head with it for his troubles.

Dazed and blurry eyed, he grabbed for the gun again, not thinking clearly, warm blood trickling down the back of his neck as he charged forward.

It was only by pure luck that as he reached for the gun, he managed to push the man over the chair that was left standing and forgotten in the room.

He jerked as the heat of a bullet span past his cheek; just missing skidding across his head by a hairs breadth. He was ready for the other bullet, and acted impulsively as an idea struck him- he wrenched the gun hand up to the ceiling, his own finger struggling to find the trigger, wheezing as five successive rabbit punches hit him in the gut. He refused to let go.

Four consecutive shots burst into the ceiling, and something hard and heavy came hurtling down.

Right towards where they struggled on the ground.

Alex wasted no time in diving away; not bothering to check if the attacker did too.

_BANG!_

The object hit the ground in a mess of dust and debris.

Chest heaving from his recent exertion, Alex wildly looked around him, still in battle mode. Blood was raging through his ears and he struggled to pinpoint where the attacker was.

Warily, he approached the fallen form- but it was too dark to tell what had happened.

Had he been crushed?

Not wanting to wait and find out whether or not this was true or false, Alex blindly grabbed up the object and ran for the window, before changing his mind and heading for the stairs, taking two at a time, trying to shake the squealing from inside his head. He must've been hit harder than he first thought.

Object clutched to his chest, he remembered what he had seen on the ceiling- four screws fixing a panel into place.

He staggered through the pitch black hallway, just missing slamming into a wall.

Four bullets did as good a job as any screwdriver.

"Come on, come on…" he hissed, fumbling as he shoved the object (it felt like a box) into his rucksack, struggling as the zip refused to budge. Giving it up for a lost cause, he swung it over his shoulder anyway, and dived for the door.

Locked.

Cursing his stupidity for locking it and ignoring Reason that tried to explain why it _wasn't _stupid, he scrabbled through his pockets desperately for the key.

He ducked.

Glass shattered, and the burglar alarm screamed its warning, sharp and shrilly.

_"I don't care whether you're some sort of super-teenage spy! Even _you _could have too much to eat and sleep through a robbery. We're _having _a burglar alarm!"_

"Not now, Jack." He moaned, scrambling onto his knees and diving to the side as his instincts bellowed at him again.

A knife thudded into the wood where he had just been.

Gasping, crawling on his hands and knees through the darkness, Alex twisted out of the way again as his instincts mercilessly told him to _move! Or you'll die!_

And he couldn't die yet- he couldn't! Not until he found out- not until he got back-!

He couldn't help the ragged yell that came from him as another knife got closer to its intended target, tearing wickedly at his flesh and he was _bleeding, there was blood, there was- _

And he stopped thinking.

The Priest stood still in the blackness.

His eyes narrowed, chest rising and falling faster than it should have been.

Something had changed about his target.

Something-

He bucked jerkily out of the way as a knife –one of _his _knives- slashed at him. Staggering back, clutching at his ripped sleeve, he turned, where had that-?

Again! A hoarse scream burst from his lips as an elbow slammed suddenly into his nose- breaking it. Stumbling back, his hand raised instinctively to hold it- but a kick disallowed that movement.

It caught him full in the stomach.

Eyes flashing now, wide, he gasped and heaved air into his lungs, head whipping from side to side. He couldn't _see! _He couldn't-

He groaned as another elbow strike caught him on the side of his head.

And then he saw him, just as blackness tinged the edges of his vision; just as his body hit the floor.

Death himself.

Death was cold eyed, blond and _merciless._

Death was fifteen years old.

Death was Alex Rider.

And he was too weak to stop it. Just like his victims.

As the knife arched towards his chest, his eyes followed the movement with some od fascination. The boy's face was void of _everything. _This, _this _was a weapon. A living, breathing, instinctive weapon.

Lights flooded the house.

The knife dropped from Alex's hand as he stumbled backwards, away from the hardly stirring assassin, a hand over his eyes to shield them. He felt dazed, lost, confused. What had he- what had he been doing? Why was-?

_You have to leave. You were running._

_Fighting, _he stubbornly amended, grabbing up his rucksack which he could now see and running towards the back door with that same half there-ness that he had. Hardly thinking, he opened the door with one powerful kick, watching with vague confusion as it smashed against the outside wall. (_"Don't slam the _door, _Alex!")_

The lights were even brighter outside, and he had to duck and roll into the grass, squirming into the hedges and ignoring the way the grass and leaves dug into his cuts and bruises, watching warily at the source of all the lights.

MI6.

They were yelling orders, pointing at the house- there were even soldiers there, holding guns and ducking into _his house._

For a brief moment, sadness filled him as he watched the soldiers move into his house, followed by what he could only assume were MI6 operatives.

His hands clenched, gathering fistfuls of grass.

It wasn't right.

But he didn't have time to deal with the injustice of the world, so he carefully slid out and away from his house, running as soon as he was out of the lights, keeping his head down as neighbours came out to find out what was happening.

He moved silently past his neighbours, unnoticed, catching some of the conversation as he passed with his head down.

"…even with him gone, there's still trouble!" came the waspish voice of the husband of the old couple that lived next to his old house. He was waving angrily at all of the lights and agents that now flooded his front lawn and were inside the house.

"Never a moment's peace!" his wife agreed in her usual and grating nasal voice.

Alex pulled a face as he moved past, ignoring the throbbing in his head. He smothered a sarcastic snort. _Never a moment's peace._ "You got that right." He muttered, stalking off into the night.

* * *

"He was here, fighting who we believe to be the Gentleman. The assassin was goneby the time was got in there, though."

"Very well. Resume your search, and tell your agents to double their efforts in their search. Tell them that the target is wounded and has hostiles after him- the effort must be redoubled."

"Yes, ma'am."

Mrs Jones put the phone down and was just about to rub the bridge of her nose tiredly when she caught herself.

"He'll be brought in soon."

Mrs Jones turned to Mr Blunt who sat on his chair watching her over his cup of tea, the steam floating over his head.

A small frown creased her forehead. "They've been searching for 6 hours, Alan. It'll be past midnight soon. Our agents are tired, they need to rest."

He continued watching her, and Mrs Jones swallowed her desire to snap at him to _stop! _"Indeed. And Alex is tired and wounded. It was only luck that he managed to get away from our agents." His eyes roved to the side, finally moving off of her. He spoke disinterestedly to the wall, instead. "He's running out of tricks. He wanted something from that house, Tulip- otherwise he wouldn't have gone there." His eyes rolled dully back onto her. "Let sleeping dogs lie, I believe the saying goes."

She couldn't help but flinch back from his burning stare.

He was _reminding _her.

Reminding her that they'd gone this far and that they weren't about to turn back.

Reminding her about things that should never have happened.

Reminding her about _that _time, that time all those years ago, all those years before Alex had even been _born._

And now, if their assumption was right, someone was trying to wake those dogs up and let them loose on them.

Unconsciously, her eyes settled on the closed laptop.

"I'll get on the phone to Alex's new guardians."

* * *

Gritting his teeth, Alex wrapped the bandage around his arm, quenching the hiss of pain that he wanted to let out.

Fighting the Priest, or Gentleman, or whatever he was had really done him in.

He was exhausted.

Cursing his own curiosity, he sank to the bottom of the wall, nursing his injuries and pounding head.

Why was nothing ever easy?

_"It's easy, Alex. All you do is raise the knife- like this-" large hands enfolding smaller ones, trembling, resisting._

_"Stop moving; you'll make it harder." A sharp tug. "Hold the knife like this and then- that's it."_

_ Large, pleading eyes, brown eyes pleading. "Ian, I-"_

_"No arguments, Alex."_

_Small, lonely hands._

_And the rabbit, so small and helpless, so-_

_"Alex."_

_A splatter of blood._

He shook his head, scattering droplets of blood and regretting the movement as black dots danced in his vision. He needed to concentrate, not get sucked up into old memories.

The box.

Where was-?

Forcing himself up, he moved towards the box, squinting as misplaced vertigo hit him, and he swayed even on his knees. Gritting his teeth, he swiped up his rucksack and picked up the box that was inside it, tugging it out with a carefulness that was usually only reserved for the handling of a Bible or some other very precious object.

Glancing around him quickly and determining the coast clear, Alex prised the lid off gently, running his hands over the corners of the box in quiet reverence- imagining his uncle's hands doing the same.

Hands trembling ever so slightly (from tiredness, not from fear) Alex dipped his hands into the box, pulling out a pile of papers all tied together with a rough piece of string.

"Alex Rider?"

He pushed the papers back into the box, stuffing it into his rucksack hastily.

The agents moved in closer, holding their bodies loose and as unthreatening as possible-except Alex _knew _what threatening was. And they were.

Hefting the back pack over his shoulders, he backed away, only to stop as he spotted other agents circling behind him.

Defensively, he dropped into a fighters pose, eyes burning with the look of a cornered animal. He might be tired, but he as sure as hell would go down fighting.

The agents paused- most likely seeing the heated defiance in his eyes. "It's OK, Alex. You're safe." Their voices were soft, what they thought was soothing. But that was not soft or soothing. He had heard soft and soothing, and it was American and high-pitched and bubbly and musical.

"We only want to bring you back to HQ, Alex, nothing else."

_Yeah, and then send me to live with some other idiot and then go on a mission. Who _wouldn't _want that? _But he kept silent, keeping his face neutral and devoid of everything.

Hesitating, Joe Barley looked at the teenager stood in front of him.

Bathed by the milky streetlights, he looked utterly worn. His blond hair was ruffled, blood congealing parts of it together, and a nasty looking cut on his arm seeping blood out of the roughly tied bandage around it. But it was the way he stood that was unnerving. The way he looked so ready to battle to the death, as if he had only gotten this far by fighting every step he went- by gnawing bloody at the ropes that tied him down and dragging himself with his hands through trials that would have killed a lesser man.

It was that hesitation, that pity that cost him.

It was well known through Alex's enemies that he didn't waste chances.

One minute Alex was there, the next he had slipped past the conflicted agents and was running.

For a while, he could only stare blankly after the retreating figure before he woke up from his shock- not hesitating any longer. "Follow him," he barked, snarling at his own leadership as he pounded alongside his men. "He won't be able to get far with those injuries."

He didn't know Alex very well.

Nodding, the agents gave chase, running after him and following the kid as he ducked and weaved, finally running into a dead end street full of low roofed houses. Joe jogged after them, speaking into his headset to the other surrounding groups.

"He's gone, sir!" one of the newer agents yelled, running back from out of the alley they had supposedly chased him into.

Joe glared, pulling back his lips into a snarl and cutting off his conversation with the person on the other end of the line. "What do you mean he's gone? You ran him into an alley, didn't you?"

The man took a step back from his fuming leader, glancing over his shoulder to check _his own _escape route. "Yes, but when we rounded the corner into the alley, no one was there!" he had his Taser, right? If his boss got violent then he would be able to use it, right?

He took another threatening step forward, the new agent's hand dipping subtly to where he kept his Taser. "Then where the hell-" he cut himself off and stared.

The agent swallowed, noticing the other agents hovering around and watching."Sir?"

"How in the hells did he get up there?" he asked faintly, seemingly staring out into the distance.

"Sir?" he asked again, slowly.

Shaking his head, he nodded to the rooftops, pressing a phone to his ear. "Yes…Beta team 4 here…he's-he's on the roof."

The hovering agents gaped at the form of a teenager hurtling over the roofs in powerful leaps and dives.

Just _who _had they been sent to catch?

Alex landed on the roof in a clumsy roll.

For a moment, he just lay there, chest heaving, breaths wheezing and one arm flung over his backpack protectively.

Getting onto the roof was easy.

Just a quick parkour stylised jump from the old bin and onto the pipe, powering his legs to kick himself off of the wall as quickly as possible and onto the corner of the roof. His uncle had taken him to a friend for a year to teach him the basics.

He clenched his throbbing fingers.

He obviously hadn't been taught long enough.

Pushing the air out from in between his teeth in a pained noise, he forced himself to stand up.

If he'd found it easy, then they would find it soon, too.

"There he is!" Right on cue.

Screwing his eyes up, he readied himself for yet another run.

His rucksack bounced against his shoulders as he ran across the roof, knowing that he'd have to get down soon.

Sighing, eyes flashing about for a place to get off of the roof, he consoled himself by the thought that they at least weren't shooting at him.

He veered to the side, staring in shock as a bullet pinged roughly off of one of the tiles on the roof. Why were they-?

Twisting his head to look back and still running, Alex stared at those who were chasing him.

Not MI6.

Definitely _not _MI6.

It was _them._

If anything, he ran even faster, weaving and ducking.

But the pursuers were catching up, and if the bursts of fragments of tiles at his heels were of any show- they weren't there for a friendly chat.

But the end of the roof was coming fast! Straight over a road! The drop wasn't so bad, but he really didn't fancy landing in amongst a sea of cars with the risk of getting ran over. Closing his eyes, the drop coming closer, he prayed, bullets angrily smacking too close to comfort- and dived.

* * *

Ben Daniels had at first been having a great day.

He and the old unit had had a get together- beers, loud laughter- that sort of manly thing.

And then he had received a call from HQ.

At first he'd sighed, flipping his phone shut and preparing to apologise to his friends to have to cut their meeting short.

But then he had received another phone call straight after, demanding that he round up _his whole old unit _and bring them in to HQ for a "soft" mission.

From the looks on their faces, they couldn't believe it too.

And now there he was, driving three SAS men down to the Royal & General Bank.

And they _wouldn't _stop asking questions.

But worse- the _same _questions.

On repeat.

"What has MI6 ever wanted with _us _before?" Wolf- or Roman (but Wolf suited him better, Ben privately thought) grumbled, flicking at the dashboard and glaring at it mutinously. "Everyone knows that the SAS and MI6 are separate on many different levels."

"We'll find out when we get there." Fox replied and then paused, frowning. Had he said that before? He _had _said that before, hadn't he?

"It started out as such a good day, too." Eagle sighed mournfully for the _fifth time running_, peering out of the window and drawing faces in the condensation.

Snake hadn't said anything- no need when the rest of the members (he still counted Fox as a member because he _was. _Time and place couldn't change that) were saying everything he'd say, anyway.

"Like I said," Wolf tried again, staring at the side of Fox's head this time.

Ben rolled his eyes. He knew that Wolf thought he knew what was going on, that he was "keeping one of his fancy MI6 secrets" again as he had so _kindly _suggested when they had gotten the phone call that evening.

"Like I said," he repeated louder, as if no one had been listening- which they hadn't. "I wonder what they want _us _for. I mean, I can understand why they'd call Fox, but why us?"

His jaw clenched. He wasn't saying it.

The silence in the car stretched.

His hands tightened on the steering wheel, eyes purposefully ahead, ignoring everyone's 'subtle' looks at him. He _wasn't _saying it.

The silence swelled.

He closed his eyes briefly and inhaled deeply through his nose, resigned. "We'll find out when we get there." His voice straining on a frustrated snarl.

"It started out as such a good day, too."

Ben's mouth opened to yell, but he was saved from exploding as a heavy bang hit the car roof.

Immediately, Ben slammed on the brakes, the car squealing angrily as the tyres struggled to stop against the road. Cars honked at them mouths of drivers opened in yells as they tried to get out of the way of the skidding car.

Eyes wide, they stared at each other as the car came to a silent stop.

"What was _that?" _Wolf hissed, hands white from where they clenched against the dashboard to stop himself from smacking his head against it in their crazy halt. People were climbing out of their cars, pointing and gesturing.

"I don't know." Ben all but whispered, heart pounding. If he hadn't been fast enough, they could've all been…

_Knockknockknock!_

Four pairs of eyes snapped to the front window where a panicked upside down face peered in, knuckles rapping against the surface urgently.

"What the-" Snake whispered distantly.

Ben opened up the car door clumsily, still in shock, and could only watch as a teen scrambled over his legs and slammed the door shut, throwing his rucksack into the back as if he owned it. "Move!" he demanded, all but shoving Fox out of the driver's seat. Fox wondered why he was allowing himself to be moved back into the back seat.

"Wait a minute- who are you?" Wolf was the first to recover after watching Fox go and clamber into the back seat in between Snake and Eagle, who also watched the proceedings with almost detached interest. "Who are you?" he demanded again, ready to throw the teen out.

He ignored him, clicking the seatbelt into place. "Seatbelts on." He barked, turning the engine on with the key that was left in ignition.

"Get out of the car!" Wolf roared, drawing himself up.

"Can you even drive?" Eagle pointed out.

The boy (oddly familiar, cool brown eyes, scowl in place except there _was _no scowl. There was just cold, emotionless-) glared at him. "I said; get your-"

"I said-"

A bullet punched through the glass.

They all ducked.

Screams erupted from outside as people dived to the floor and into their cars. Mass panic.

The boys foot slammed onto the peddle. "Seatbelts!" he yelled, the car streaking forward.

No one argued after that.

Alex shook his head as those frustrating black dots danced in front of his eyes again; swerving the wheel round quickly as he almost drove straight into a wall.

"Careful!" Fox yelled.

Alex gritted his teeth, pressing harder on the peddle, screaming dangerously round a corner, urging the car faster and faster.

Men appeared round the corners of the street he was heading past.

His eyes widened as they all pulled out guns.

He couldn't turn back.

He had to drive past them.

"Everyone down, now!"

Seeing the problem, they all threw themselves down onto the floor of the car, Alex half holding onto the wheel to keep the car going straight as he kept his head down, yelling as the glass shattered and broke, sending star sharp fragments flying everywhere, into hair and onto clothes, nicking skin.

Forcing his fear down, Alex sat up and grabbed the wheel properly, speeding down a deserted street, and round the first corner he could see.

He kept driving, on and on, not caring that he had long left the attackers behind. His eyes burnt, hands gripping the wheel. He just needed to drive to drive far away, far, far away.

Ben Daniels, after looking cautiously out of the now non-existent back window determined the threat to be gone. Glancing at his two friends in the back seat to make sure they were OK- they were, just a little shocked and holding only small cuts and bruises- he turned to the kid in the front.

Ben stared at him, at the way he viciously turned corners and how his eyes never stayed still- even whilst driving.

He looked a mess, Ben realised. He was covered in injuries that hadn't come from the recent run in with the shooters, his head was bleeding sluggishly, and it looked like he had bruises forming on what was visible of his arms. Ben winced, dreading to see the damage underneath.

Opening his mouth, he was just about to speak out when the kid stopped the car suddenly; reversing brutally into the street he'd just driven out of.

The engine turned off.

Alex rubbed a hand against his forehead wearily. He had just been about to go down that road when he had seen operatives blocking the exits and checking cars. Quickly, he flicked the lights off, and, with no streetlights shining on them, that left them all in darkness, only the sounds of heavy breathing and the distant flashes of torches from the MI6 operatives sporadically lighting up their faces in bursts of silver.

"I need to go." He muttered, unclipping his seatbelt. "Thanks for the ride." He reached for the door handle of the car.

A heavy hand clamped around his wrist.

Alex stared down at it.

"You're not going anywhere, _kid." _Wolf growled, the three other men staring at him hard from the back.

Alex's heart sank.

He wasn't going anywhere. Not with 3 and 1 ex SAS members in the car.

He sat up straighter. But he wasn't giving in, he would _never _give in.

"What do you want?" he heard himself asking. He needed to rest. He was tired, body not reacting as fast as it could be, body sluggish and mind unresponsive- a dangerous place to be.

_"It is important that you're always wary of your surroundings, Alex. When you're not, that's when mistakes strike."_

"Yes, Ian." He mumbled.

"What? Whose Ian?"

He glared blearily at the speaker of the voice, well aware that his voice was coming out more slurred than usual. And _did _his head hurt! It felt like someone was slamming it against the wall time and time again. "I don't have time to play twenty questions! I've got to _go!" _stubbornly, he reached out for the door again, growling in frustration as Ben pulled him back this time.

His voice was dry. "Seriously, kid. We saw the way you were driving; we _know _you've got to get away. But now you've dragged _us _into your problems, so you'd better tell us what's going on- and quick."

_"You always drag people into your problems! Why can't you just _leave us out of it_! Go away! Go away!" screaming, frenzied-no! Keep her back! Keep her back! It wasn't- it was an accident! It was an accident!_

"What was an accident?"

Alex stared blurrily Fox, Ben, MI6, danger, enemy. He groaned softly. Had he said that out loud? "It doesn't matter." He muttered. "I need to _go."_

A knock at the window.

Alex turned round.

His eyes widened.

Joe Barley gaped back.

K-Unit watched in surprise as the kid threw open the door, knocking the man back and onto the tarmac. MI6 agents came charging round the corner. The kid dived out of the door.

"Grab him! MI6!"

Hardly thinking- an order was an order, SAS or MI6- Wolf grabbed the boy and hauled him bodily back into the car.

"Let go!" he snapped, heaving in Wolf's strong grip. "I said let-"

The four men stared as Alex suddenly tensed and jerked in Wolf's grasp, eyes wide and mouth open in a silent cry. Finally, his body relaxed, twitching every now and then.

The four men turned to stare at Joe Barley who stood with one hand clutching his bleeding forehead, and another with a Taser pointing at the teen's chest, wires still linked to the kid's body. He shrugged unapologetically, face hard and set. "I had orders to bring him in any way possible." Coming closer to the car, he knelt down to check the unconscious teenager before, satisfied that he wouldn't be leaping onto roofs anytime soon, he straightened up. "Alex Rider, threat neutralised. Let's take him to HQ." he yelled to his men.

"Alex Rider?" Snake muttered, and then turned to Ben who was sat decidedly still, the boy's rucksack sat on his leg. "What do you make of that, Fox?"

He didn't reply.

Snake frowned, leaning over to peer at Fox's face. "Fox?"

Ben stared at the collapsed teen in shock.

…Alex?

What was going on?

**Well. That took ages. I'm tired. But I did it all for YOOOOUUUU! ALLL because I love you *sings and dances around the kitchen table* AND I'M HAPPY WITH IT! Tell me if you like it, please! After all that, I deserve it, right? Right? Well, do I? Until next time my lovelies!**


	4. Chapter 4

AN- ***Crawls out of dark room with bags under eyes and clutching an old cup of coffee, smiles- cue horrific screams* Hello! And thank you for your reviews everyone! You've all been so helpful and lovely! I've really been wanting to write this chapter for AGES! (Well, like, two days) and now here it is! Chapter four of ****_The Price of a Collar _****and more to come! **

**Disclaimer- I can't believe I actually have to do this still…I don't own Alex Rider and NOR do I own any of Anthony Horowitz' characters. Happy now?**

* * *

"Mr Blunt, Mrs Jones; a certain 'K- unit' are waiting outside for you." A polite voice rose from the intercom positioned on Mr Blunt's desk.

"Allow them entry." He said curtly, clicking off before the woman could reply, eyes trained to the corner of his office.

The door clicked open, and four bedraggled looking men strode in. Mrs Jones' eyes snapped to the rucksack clutched in one of the groups fist- Snake, his codename was.

"Please, take a seat." She said smoothly, knowing that if she didn't, they never would. Her superior was not the sort to offer "trivial pleasantries".

They nodded seriously and sat down in the four chairs placed directly in front of Mr Blunt's desk, looking uncomfortable when they realised that the person who had indeed ordered them to come wasn't even paying the slightest bit of attention to their presence. Only Ben looked the least perturbed, having been in this situation before.

"Thank you for coming." Mrs Jones smiled at them from her usual position of the corner of her superior's desk. The thank you wasn't needed- it wasn't as if they had much choice in the matter. Realising that they knew this too, she carried on briskly. "I understand that you've had quite a rough journey getting here."

K-Unit exchanged scathing glances.

That was one way of putting it.

Ben cleared his throat, attracting all of their attention- minus Alan Blunt's. Smiling as politely as he could without letting show how anxious he was (Mrs Jones probably already knew, he realised uncomfortably), he chose his words clearly. "We…" pausing, he chose the words he wanted. "…bumped into Alex on the way here."

"Ah, quite." Mrs Jones smiled back- warmth as fake as that of a radiator or electric fire.

There was a pause where they waited for Mrs Jones to expand on the point, but she didn't, and Ben realised in exasperation that she wasn't going to unless he asked.

"Is he…OK?" Ben attempted to ask without sounding too irritated by their lack of information they supplied him with.

"He's doing well." Mrs Jones affirmed, looking amused- at what, Ben didn't quite know.

"Has he received any hospital treatment?" Snake cut in before Ben could tactfully ask the same question. The blond Scot ignored Ben's subtle nudge. Yes, his voice was probably harsher than it should've been, but it just wasn't right. After watching Alex being hit by a Taser, the operatives had hauled him up, flung him into the back of their van and offered K-Unit a ride.

_"Fox, do you know this kid?" Eagle asked; prodding Fox's distracted form in frustration, eyes sharp as he waited impatiently for Fox to reply._

_Dazedly, he nodded. "Alex," his voice was nothing more than an unfocused murmur, eyes locked on the kid's unconscious form that still laid half on Wolf and off. "It's…Cub."_

_They stared at Fox, and then turned to stare at…Cub._

_"Cub?" Snake muttered faintly._

_"Yeah." Fox said softly, his eyebrows creased in a mass of web like confused thoughts. "I don't know what he's doing here…"_

_"Why are MI6 even chasing him?" Eagle snapped- more to himself than to anyone else. He was glaring at Cub's unresponsive form as if he would suddenly sit up and explain what was going on._

_They looked up as Joe Barley began to speak to them, hooking his Taser back into its pouch with an air of satisfaction around him, still clutching at his bloody forehead. Nodding to them, he gestured to one of their vehicles. "Do you need a lift to the bank?" he smiled wanly at Fox, having recognised him from a few random meetings on corridors within the headquarters of MI6._

_Suddenly noticing their apparent lack of windows- all had been shot out- they nodded numbly._

_"Thanks, that'd be helpful." Wolf said gruffly, eyes boring into Cub's (definitely his- not quite soft- stern looking in sleep) face. In a sharp tone that could be misinterpreted as rudeness had someone not had the experience with people with rough edges, he barked at Joe Barley. "And what's this kid doing?"_

_The operative paused, eyes filling with something close to both apprehension and barbed indignation- he'd never had to deal with Wolf-type's before. "Classified." He clipped, and then, noticing their bedraggled appearance, his eyes softened somewhat and he sighed, pulling a hand over his eyes. "A runaway. We needed to chase him down."_

_Nodding reluctantly, realising that they weren't going to get anything more out of this man, they climbed out of the car, shaking loose bits of glass from their clothing, and watched intently as a few of the operatives (not-so) gently lifted Cub out of the car and (not very) carefully placed him in the back of a van, where four operatives climbed in after him._

_"Get in." Joe called, leaning out of his window._

_Awkwardly, Snake noticing Fox giving his Mercedes Benz a mournful look whilst Eagle pulled him away from it, they clambered into the back of the van, sitting alongside some other operatives who nodded silently to them._

_The journey was tense and uneventful. None of the operatives travelling in the back with them said anything, all sitting tight lipped and tense, staring ahead. In the quiet atmosphere, none of K-Unit spoke either, too busy in their thoughts of ("double-0-nothing!" "what a waste of time!" "bratty kid") Cub dancing round in their heads- a teasing, disappearing waltz that refused to stay and tell them what was going on._

_And finally they were there._

_Getting out of the van and breathing in relief at no longer having to stay in the icy atmosphere, Snake stopped mid-stretch to stare at the sight that hailed him._

_"Snake?" Wolf demanded._

_"Hey!" he ignored Wolf who hovered by his side, striding angrily over to the operatives who stopped hesitantly, carrying Cub in between two of them and giving Snake an odd, almost irritated look. "What are you doing?" he snapped as he reached their side, noticing the rest of his unit come to stand behind him supportively. He glared at the operatives, feet placed wide apart in his demand._

_"The heads want to see him." They said slowly, still giving Snake that weird look- as if he was an idiot._

_He gritted his teeth and narrowed his eyes, looking at _them _like they were idiots- because they obviously were if they thought that Cub didn't need medical attention. "Why isn't he being taken to a hospital?" he growled, taking another threatening step forward._

_Annoyance flashed through their eyes. "We don't _know. _We're only here to follow orders- not give them."_

_Snake, ready to retaliate with something else, stopped as Wolf grabbed his forearm. Spinning round to tell him that _this kid needed to go to a hospital, _his anger was quickly put out as Wolf shook his head minutely at him, face dark and tense. "Leave it, Snake."_

_ The operatives, glancing at Snake one last time suspiciously, they left, carrying (hauling) Cub in between them._

_ What the _hell _was going on?_

Seemingly oblivious to Snake's mental rant, Mrs Jones smiled sympathetically. "We had him looked over by a medic. They cleaned up his injuries and sorted out his minor wounds."

_Is that all? _"Thank you." Ben jumped in quickly, with hasty grace. Snake had looked ready to snarl something that would be hard to pick back up. He fixed the deputy with his most beaming smile. "That he's been checked over, I mean."

She nodded sagely, eyes flickering to Snake as if knowing what he had just been about to say. Then, her eyes turned to Mr Blunt of who _still _hadn't turned to them. Hadn't he heard of basic courtesies?

"Continue." He ordered, eyes finally moving from his position of looking at-

Wolf tugged at Eagle and Snake to stop them from peering over at whatever had captured Blunt's attention, growling a soft warning in the back of his throat. He couldn't have his team looking like nosey schoolchildren; they needed to keep their order when they were in such a high ranking place. Who _knew _what these people would do if they saw something they didn't like?

Mrs Jones cleared her throat; effectively ridding him of his thoughts of all the ways the Intelligence agencies could find to silence them. Wolf swivelled his dark and undoubtedly _curious _eyes onto her. _Finally, _they were going to find out what they had actually been called here for.

But Mrs Jones seemed to have no intention of doing that just yet.

She tilted her (not very elegant, more smooth, not giving anything away) chin at a certain object pushed roughly by Snake's legs. "May we have that?" she asked civilly- though her eyes said very clearly to _give it here, or else._

Snake glanced to Wolf for direction.

He knew that _he _didn't want to hand the bag over to these people, but Wolf would have the final say in that matter.

Snake hid a sigh as Wolf nodded, curious himself to see what was in the bag- not that he'd probably ever get a look at it- Snake thought rebelliously.

"It was on Cu- Alex." Snake explained, handing over the bag with reluctance in his eyes. His hand almost seemed to be fighting against giving over the bag (possession, treasure, home) to Mrs Jones. It wasn't _hers. _But, he had to grudgingly reason, that it Military Intelligence wanted it then he had no right to keep it from them. Keeping it from them would be like keeping a piece of meat from a lion. It'd get both in the end.

"Did he have anything else with him?" Mrs Jones' voice bled through Snake's ears and he turned his head to the side, unwilling to think about Cub any longer. Was he a fugitive now or something? His eyebrows furrowed in thought, ignoring Eagle who was tapping him in mild concern. He hadn't _looked _like a fugitive. He had just looked pale, and tired, and dangerously-

"No. That was all he had on him." Wolf answered gruffly, obviously lost in his own thoughts too, if his constantly wandering eyes were of any indication. He also had that distinctive crumple in between his eyebrows- the one that was there whenever he was involved in deep thought.

Nodding slightly, unconcernedly, Mrs Jones turned her attention to the bag; eyes cutting as she carefully slipped the box out of the rucksack, seemingly ignoring everything else inside of it as she placed the now box-less item on the floor.

K-Unit didn't ignore it though.

They noticed the water and the first aid kit, the map and the collection of papers stuffed with hasty order into the bag. Again, their eyes met. What had Cub been planning to _do? _Or better yet, why had Cub felt the need to…_run?_

The sound of paper drew everyone's attention, and gazes snapped to Mrs Jones who had taken the contents of the box out with a certain sharpness to her eyes and tightness to her lips.

Movement caused their eyes to see Mr Blunt as he silently held out a hand, and, after pulling the old string off of the bundle which tied them together, Mrs Jones respectfully placed the papers into his awaiting hands.

Giving no thanks, Mr Blunt peeled off the first page carefully, his eyes scanning whatever was on it with piercing eyes behind flashing glasses.

After he had very quickly reached the bottom of the first page, a noticeable…tension came about him.

The air was suddenly heavy.

Mr Blunt was actually allowing himself to _seem _tense.

Even Wolf, Eagle and Snake- none of whom knew Blunt and his emotionlessness quite as scantily as Fox and _definitely _not as well as Mrs Jones- even they knew something was wrong.

Licking his dry lips, Eagle glanced at Fox who met his gaze with worry showing in his eyes. What was _in _that box?

Wordlessly, Mr Blunt handed the papers over to Mrs Jones, who had been giving him a questioning look all throughout reading it.

She took the papers. After an almost unnoticeable pause, her eyes flickering questioningly over to Alan Blunt, she began reading just the first page carefully and methodically.

Her reaction- although subtle- proved to heighten their nervous curiosity.

Her eyes widened- briefly, only slightly- you'd miss it if you blinked. But what fluttered in them…

Ben gripped his armrest tightly.

Fear.

Forcing a tense breath out between his lips, he closed his eyes quickly. What had Alex gotten that made even the heads flinch away from it?

Wordlessly, Mrs Jones exchanged a glance with Mr Blunt.

It seemed like a blank gaze- one that you would expect two fish placed in the same tank to give each other- but K-Unit just _knew _that there had been a thousand crystallised messages in there- not one that they had managed to successfully interpret.

And before they knew it, the papers were back in the box. And if possible, when Mrs Jones looked at them, her eyes were even _more _stone like- even more cold and hard and _lifeless. _"Nothing to worry about." She crinkled her eyes in a graveyard smile.

They stared at her.

Seriously?

* * *

From hard learned experiences; Alex had learnt to wake up silently.

No soft or sleepy groan to give away your position- no twist of the body or drowsy sitting up.

Just silence.

It used to scare Jack, when she had crept into his room to collect his washing in the morning. She would bend down, pick up his unclean (_"but so organized! You know, Alex," she had sighed, exasperated, and he had looked at her like he'd failed some sort of secret test, shoulders slumped, head bent, twisting to look at the corner of the room. "you don't have to fold up dirty washing and place it in colour and non-colour piles! That's _my _job!" and he would look at her blankly. Because there was _no such _as "her" job.) _washing, turn around ready to creep back out of his room only to have Alex staring straight at her.

She'd screamed at that, he remembered, and wondered why he couldn't laugh or cry at the memory. Why he only felt a bottomless empty.

He wondered whether she had screamed when the bomb had gone off.

Whether it was as loud, as grating and-

He opened his eyes with a snap.

He didn't want to think about that.

Eyes moving methodically and with practised ease around the room, he forced down his first desire to get up and move his aching and sore limbs, breathing in the tingling smell of antiseptic. Someone had come and cleaned up his wounds. Ignoring the whining in his head- an after effect from the conversation he'd recently had with the wrong end of a Taser (such a lovely conversation) he concentrated instead on figuring out where he was.

Blunt's office, he realised with a sense of dread.

He twitched his hand, feeling the fabric underneath him and the warmth of the material.

On a _sofa._

Now that was just creepy.

Careful not to give away the fact that he was actually awake, keeping his breathing at the same pace and depth that it had been when he had been awake and realising that he was facing the wrong way to whoever was in the room with him (_he could feel them. _Watching _him, they were there- he just knew it, ready to pounce, ready to-), _he struggled to remember just what had happened to land him in this situation- thoughts floating around like cotton on a teasing wind.

He had been running (_fighting my way through) _on a roof…then there had been gunshots. And he was still running (_fighting) _on the roof, and then he had run _off _the roof. And he was falling, falling, closer to the ground and then-

His breath caught, and he forcefully eased it out, loosening his tight muscles with an internal warning. He had landed on top of a car.

The bruises on his ribs and side laughed painfully at him, jeering him for his _desperation _to have to leap off of a roof.

Hiding a wince, he closed his eyes again, getting his breathing under control after the sudden strike of pain. Gritting his teeth, he scowled internally at the next cotton wool memory- of _all _the cars to land on; it _had _to be K-Unit's! What were the chances?

_1 to 10, enough of a chance for you, Alex. _His thoughts whispered maliciously. _Who was it that said-_

_ I didn't say that! _He snapped back to the biting voice. He _didn't _say that!

The sound of paper being moved woke him from his internal argument.

Paper.

A cold feeling spread through his body with frightening speeds.

_Paper._

His rucksack!

He was such an _idiot; (" what a foolish child you are, Alex. To think you thought-") _an

_imbecile! How _could he have forgotten what had got him in this mess in the first place?

"Nothing to worry about."

More cold spread through him.

They had _looked._

Before him.

Again.

_Before you were born; before you could speak, before you knew, before-_

"Give it back." And his voice had come out before he had ordered it to- strong and cold and so (_un? Was it un)_like Alex's own that it _frightened _him because it felt like he hardly even _knew _himself anymore, like he hardly even-

"Cub?"

Wolf, Fox, Snake and Eagle stared at the corner of the room where a blond haired boy sat up- no traces of fatigue or the recent trauma of being shot at on his face. In fact, was it not for the bruises already forming on his face- a particularly nasty one on his chin- it would be easy enough to believe that Alex hadn't been in a dangerous situation before.

But what was he _doing _there?

At least they now knew what Blunt had been looking at and what Mrs Jones had found so amusing.

Fox watched; body tense for some reason, as Alex's eyes flickered briefly to them. Alex gave them a look as if to say _what are _you _doing here?_

Which they answered with a silent yell of: _why were you sleeping in _Mr Blunt's _office? _in their own eyes, Eagle practically squirming out of his seat in his need to ask Cub the question right then and there.

"Ah, Alex." Mrs Jones said, placing the box precisely down and onto the desk where Mr Blunt had a very casual hand positioned next to it. Close enough to grab, the unit realized. Though they really couldn't imagine Mr Blunt grabbing at _anything _in a physical sense. "You're awake." A pointless statement.

Alex's facial expression didn't even shift. Mrs Jones _never _asked pointless questions- she was much like Mr Blunt in that regard. "I believe so." He said monotonously, and then very purposefully lowered his eyes to the box that was sitting (too close, too-) to Mr Blunt's hand and Mrs Jones' side. "That's mine." He said quietly, pushing his legs off of the comfortable ("_comfort is dangerous, Alex. Never allow yourself to become too comfortable.") _sofa and sitting up straight and alert.

Mr Blunt's eyes dragged over him slowly and methodically- and how he _hated _that look. _Hated _the way that his eyes were so mechanical and cold, holding no affection- he examined Alex like one would a machine they were considering using. "I think you'll find-" he paused, eyes locking with Alex's. "-that it's your uncle's property. Not yours." His eyes penetrated into Alex's own.

Alex's eyes burnt in well contained rage.

He knew what Blunt was insinuating.

_"And since everything of your uncle's belongs to us. As do you…" _

His jaw clenched, and he purposefully held out a hand. "That's mine." He repeated immovable from his stand. He'd taken up his armour and sword, so he was damn well going to use it and use it well.

Snake shifted uncomfortably on his padded chair, glancing guiltily at the box still placed warningly in between two of the most powerful people in Britain. Maybe he shouldn't have handed it over…

Very slowly and very finally, Alan Blunt picked up the box, keeping his eyes trained on Alex through the whole thing- of whom had stood up now and was softly approaching Blunt's desk, his movements liquid and cat-like- and placed it in one draw, clacking it shut with a _clack _that seemed to stand by the same noise of that of a funeral bell- final.

Blunt peered at Alex disparagingly. "Not quite yet, Alex." Mr Blunt said quietly but forcefully. "Not quite yet."

Alex stood directly in front of Alan Blunt who sat swivelled to face him, his hand still (teasingly. It was, wasn't it? He was taunting Alex, showing him what he couldn't have) on the draw where _his _box, _his uncle's belongings _were currently stashed.

Alex gave Mr Blunt the most furious look he could without changing his expression; completely ignoring K-Unit who watched awkwardly from the side lines.

Wolf watched Alex try and stare down Mr Blunt, who obviously wasn't moving an inch.

"It's _mine._" He pressed, voice becoming more urgent from its last deadpan tone. The kid's brown eyes were blank but almost…_dangerous. _"Give it back."

Mr Blunt didn't even dignify Cub's demand with a response, Wolf realised with slight awe, watching the way that the MI6 head just blinked slowly at Alex- much as someone would whilst watching a very boring film or talk.

Cub's posture grew more tense, and Mrs Jones tutted a clear warning which Cub (what was he even _doing _here? How could he talk to the MI6 superiors like that?) blatantly ignored. "Give it back." A hint of a plea had entered into the teenager's voice, having come to the same conclusion as Wolf- Blunt was not going to give up on this.

"Sit down, Alex." He commanded, turning away from him and back to the K-Unit, who sat up straighter at the sudden attention.

Alex could only stare at Mr Blunt.

He was very obviously ignored.

Mrs Jones repeated Mr Blunt's order to sit down.

He didn't comply or give any hint to having heard her. He _had _heard her; he just preferred not to _listen. _And K-Unit were sat there gaping at him, their thoughts too clear on their faces, like: _What's he doing? _Or _What's so important about that box? _Or-or- he didn't _care _what they thought. That was _his! His _and Mr Blunt had no reason to touch it- no reason to touch it as if he _owned- ("you're mine, Alex. All-") _like he _owned _Alex's things. That was his _uncle's (a pause, hopeful eyes. Blank eyes staring back. "Attachments are a show of weakness, Alex." A crush of a butterfly's wings) _and so it belonged to him! It belonged to-

"It's mine!" so what if he was snapping to the side of Blunt's head? So what if K-Unit were now staring at him like he was having some teenage tantrum? If they even _knew _him- which they didn't- then they'd _know _that he didn't throw tantrums!

And there was no reply _again._

Just that stone cold silence- sharp in its intensity.

He felt his chest squeeze tightly, the threat of his breaths coming out sharp and rapid hovering along the horizon. His eyes blurred at the thought that he couldn't (_"nothing, Alex. That is what-") _have _anything. _Jack was gone, the Pleasures- the- and now this _stupid box! _Which he had risked his life for, been beaten up for, been almost _killed _for had been snatched away from him! It wasn't (_"nothing's fair, Alex. That's just how life-") _fair!

"Give it _back!"_

"Sit down, Alex!" Mrs Jones snapped, turning to him with cold irritation flashing through her eyes (_sharper than anger. Anger was better, irritation was hard to get away from, hard to make better. And he _wanted _to make it better- he really did. But Ian was so-)_.

What type of expression was his face twisted into? Was it real or was it fake? "But I had to-"

"Sit. Down."

Alex felt cold (_not fear. Never fear. I don't want- I don't want-) _terror wash through him at the sound of Mr Blunt glaring at him. No- no, glaring wasn't the right term for it. It was ice cold, sharper than a knife but so flat. So…frightening but so…_nothing._

He sat.

"Good," Mr Blunt didn't seem to notice the wide eyes of his visitors, nor the way they sat pressed into their chairs, watching him warily. Even Mrs Jones looked suitably ruffled. Interlocking his fingers and placing his elbows on the desk, he placed his chin on top of them and surveyed them all. "Now," he almost drawled. "K-Unit and Ben Daniels."

"Yes, sir." They replied quickly, stunned into reacting hastily from his latest display.

Alex didn't react.

Eagle looked over at him subtly, noting the way he sat poised, seemingly staring ahead, but his eyes foggy and almost bewildered. Turning back to listen to Blunt he couldn't help but sigh- he didn't blame the kid for looking like that. A teenager wasn't meant to be told off like that- it was almost…brutal.

"We have a mission for you. I believe you know what it entails." The head looked at them for affirmation.

"Yes, sir." Wolf rumbled respectfully, wary of this smaller-than-him but obviously powerful man. "Guarding for a duration of time that is not yet known. The subject we'll be guarding is classified." His eyes slid to Cub who still had not moved from staring vacantly at the space in front of him. He thought he knew just whom he would be guarding.

"That's right, Roman."

Wolf's eyes snapped to Mr Blunt who was also now watching Alex- who didn't seem to notice the attention. "Meet your new temporary charge, Alex Rider."

The four men stared at Alex, who finally shook himself from his daze and turned to look at them all blankly.

Eagle cleared his throat, eyes still on Cub warily. "Surely, sir- meaning no disrespect for your authority- of course-" he hastily added. "But, is a full unit of four SAS trained men necessary to guard one teenager?"

Alex's eyes seemed to fade out again briefly before they retained their focus, sliding them back to the wall that he had been examining for a while.

"I assure you," Mrs Jones said dryly, finally unwrapping a peppermint- Ben had been wondering when it would happen- and slipping it into her mouth with practised ease. "Four SAS trained men are _most _necessary for Alex Rider- or 'Cub' as you seem to know him as." She smiled at them all.

The name 'Cub' certainly sounded safer than 'Alex Rider'. Eagle thought, glancing again at Cub. Alex was an unknown entity whilst Cub- Cub was a quietly sarcastic teen who seemed to like to remain in control, but was good at following (the ones he thought were worth following, at least) orders to the best of his ability. Cub was smaller than them and looked weak and followed them around like a puppy, watching them and trying to keep up as best as he could.

Alex was smaller than them, and yes, at that moment _did _look weak, but they had _seen _him in the car. He didn't look so weak then. He looked dangerous. Alex was an unknown- a mystery. This wasn't _Cub._

"I can live on my own." Alex's voice startled Eagle as it seemed to do his teammates.

The teen turned to them slowly. "After all, I know-"

"Quiet, Alex." Mrs Jones ordered.

He snapped his mouth shut but shot her a rebellious glare.

Ignoring his look, she smiled at them. "Alex has had four guardians before you- all of which he managed to escape."

After digesting that news, Fox asked carefully, wary not to push his level of authority. "Why is he in need of guarding, Mrs Jones?"

She looked at him with her dark and starless eyes. "He's in danger." She said simply.

Alex snorted sharply, drawing the attention of the soldiers again. "I'm always in-"

"If you continue like this, Alex, then you will stand outside." Mrs Jones threatened, Mr Blunt gazing at Alex.

Eyes wide in disbelief, Alex stared at them. They would make him- He had to swallow back a near hysterical laugh. They had taken everything from him- _everything _and now they were saying that if he didn't sit still and be quiet like a good little boy then they would make him sit outside? He turned away, facing the wall to control his unusual emotions. He needed to calm down. Being in this stifling company made him feel trapped again ("_like a bird in a cage, Rider. Like a bird in a cage."). _Once again, he found his breaths hitching uncomfortably. _In control, Alex, stay in control. _He ordered himself.

Oh, he knew what Mrs Jones and Mr Blunt were doing. They didn't want the soldiers to know that Alex was a teenage spy, and so were putting him in as bad a light as possible- making him seem like a whiny and spoilt teenager who didn't know when to shut up. And- judging from the feel of the gazes prickling on his turned head- they were doing a good job of it.

The four soldiers blinked at Alex's turned head.

Really? They had to look after some rebellious teenager now? Snake sucked in a sigh, glancing at the ceiling for guidance. This wasn't his idea of an interesting job. It seemed more…annoying.

"We have a house already in order for you. To reduce any questions, Alex has been adopted into-"

"No."

Tiredly, irately, the soldiers turned to face Alex who glared with quiet ferocity at Mrs Jones. Ben frowned. He didn't remember Alex being so fussy the last time he had seen him.

"No." Alex repeated softly, face back into that unnerving mask. "I refuse to be moved about like a piece of luggage. I've _told _you that I can live by myself. I don't need a _babysitter."_

"And we've told you, Alex." Mrs Jones replied equally as soft, face equally as blank. "That that won't be happening. You're in danger, Alex. Your parents-"

"Don't you dare." Alex hissed; taking the soldiers by surprised at the amount of loathing in his voice.

"Don't I dare what?" she retorted, eyes flashing with some sort of warning. "Your mother and father have told you personally that this sort of behaviour will not be tolerated. You know that they wouldn't be happy with you. Would they Alex?"

And suddenly Alex couldn't _breathe. _He couldn't _breathe _and he was staring at Mrs Jones and something was- something was shutting down and he could hardly hear- hardly- hardly _hear _and now she was asking him again about his parents who _weren't alive _and- why was she _doing _this? Was this punishment for something? Had he-

"Would they Alex?" she pressed again. Her eyes told him to agree, that this was part of something, part of-

But he didn't care, and he was out of his seat.

"You should go and die, right now."

Silence seemed to pour into the room.

Ben Daniels shivered. That wasn't the right tone for any teenager to have. It was too calm, said in such a blissful voice- like he knew it could happen- like he really wanted it to happen. And his eyes! Ben glanced at the rest of his team to find the rest of them looking as shell-shocked as he was. Cub's eyes were so…almost, _peaceful. _Like the thought of her dying was really something-

"Go outside. Now."

Mr Blunt's voice was quietly furious, and almost unconsciously, the four men's hands dropped to their gun holsters, pressing back against the chair backs.

Something flickered into Alex's eyes, and his body stiffened. No looking at anyone, he left, shutting the door behind him.

Mrs Jones was still staring at the place Alex had stood and Mr Blunt was more stone-faced than usual- looking unwilling to talk.

"Is he- is he always like that?" Fox found himself asking, voice hushed in the electric silence.

Mr Blunt turned slowly to face him - all traces of rage gone, and the air cleared. "No. As you've seen, he's had a rather bad day." He replied in a grey tone. He raked them over again with his eyes, the look seeming to ask why they were still there. "Alex has some tendencies to be rebellious."

_Rebellious? _Ben frowned, but did not see his expression mirrored. No one had had the chance to really see Alex like he had. That seemed the wrong word for Cub- _But this isn't Cub, really, is it Ben? _Some anxious voice fretted inside him.

"So…are we just acting as Cub's guardians, then?" Wolf asked gruffly; the explanation had never been finished.

Mrs Jones tore her eyes away from the vacated space. "In a sense, yes." Her eyes revolved to Fox. "Treat this as a cover mission. You will be a family who adopted Cub- made up of adopted people yourself." She added, seeing the looks they passed each other. None of them exactly _looked _like they could be related. "Alex will be with you until the threat has been cleared."

Snake cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Do you mind me asking what the threat is?"

Mrs Jones gazed at him emptily and then smiled a hollow smile. "The threat could be anyone who wishes to harm or take Alex. I'm afraid any more information than that is classified."

Reluctantly, they nodded, unwilling to try probing these dangerous people for more information.

Mrs Jones turned and pulled out a folder from her bag. Noticing them watching her, she handed the plastic folder to Wolf, who opened it hesitantly. "These are credit cards and additional passes that will be able to get you past the police- all MI6 based." She shook her head as Eagle made to ask a question. "We don't expect you to need to contradict the police, but there have been occasions where Alex has…caused some trouble and has had to be let free from there. If Alex does anything that requires a law based consequences, we will expect that to be your job as guardians- or, if it seems too serious for you to cope with- then you can pass him over to us. We'll have a word with him."

Ben swallowed, seeing the movement reciprocated by his other friends. He hoped that it never came to that.

"The way to your house is in that folder along with all of the security details and details of your neighbours- as well as the cover information you will be expected to know. You four will be travelling with Alex in the new car provided to your house. There are enough rooms and space four all of you. That will be all." She completed.

Slowly, one by one, all holding a variety of expressions stood; mumbled thanks and prepared to leave the office until Mr Blunt stopped them.

They turned to face Mr Blunt, backs straight.

"And if Alex tells you _anything. _I want to know." He rasped.

"Yes, sir."

"Tell Alex to come in on your way out."

Nodding, they piled out of the door, desperate to be out, but anxious not to let it show.

"Ah, Cub." Eagle found himself forcing a cheery voice, though his eyes were trained on Cub guardedly. "Mr Blunt wants to speak to you." The rest of the unit watched Alex expressionlessly, all trying to work the kid out.

"I bet he does." The teen muttered, standing up and opening the door without a single knock and stepping in, leaving the K-Unit to stand and wait for him in the hall.

"He's changed." Snake remarked quietly in the hush that had fallen.

Eagle shifted uneasily, eyes flicking to the camera on the wall. "We never really knew him though, did we? Maybe he hasn't changed; maybe this is just what he's like."

"Maybe he's having a bad day." Fox pressed, folding his arms and unwilling to think the worst of Alex when they had met under such unusual circumstances.

"We have to _look after _this kid, guys. We'd better work out how we're going to do this." Wolf warned, leaning against the wall with his eyes half-shut, a forcefully lazy posture, but tension kept his back rigid.

"Yeah." They murmured softly.

This was _not _their idea of a "soft" mission.

* * *

"Your actions today were childish and inexcusable."

"Your actions today were ridiculous and pointless."

"You're treading on thin ice here, Alex."

"And you're right in the centre of it."

Alex and Mr Blunt glared at each other, one stood with his arms hung by his side, the other sat, fingers rapping into his desk top.

"I suggest," Mr Blunt began quietly, eyes smouldering. "That you remember your place."

"And where's that?" Alex asked; voice deadly soft- almost pleasant.

Mr Blunt stared at Alex. "MI6's top draw, under lock and key."

(_"Like a bird in a cage, Rider. Like a bird in a cage") _the voice seemed to whisper- a dream- that was all. Not a reality, not a- "You can't do that." His voice was calm.

Mr Blunt tilted his head ever so slightly. "I think you'll find we can."

"I'll fight back again." He said harshly. "I'll fight you till you let me go." His eyes dropped to the draw where the box was. "And I want my uncle's box."

"Agent Ian Rider is dead. The box- as are you- is our property." His voice was slow, bored.

Alex found himself growing frustrated. This wasn't going to work. Save from steal it he had no way to get the box. And stealing it would be impossible- he'd be caught immediately. Begging would get him nowhere, and the thought of pleading to these two people made him feel physically sick. "You have nothing over me." He said almost gently, as gently as a creeping panther. "You don't own me, and you can't make me do anything." He folded his arms, eyes triumphant. "So let me have the box."

(_"Attachments are a weakness, Alex.") _Mr Blunt gazed at him blankly, Mrs Jones sucked on her peppermint, looking engrossed in a folder she was currently reading. Mr Blunt pressed his finger on the intercom. "Miss Lacey, report to the head office immediately." He clicked off, eyes never leaving Alex's face.

After about a minute, a woman rushed in- someone Alex didn't know, but who looked like she did desk work.

"Yes, sir?" she asked hurriedly, smoothing down her pastel yellow dress- very conscious of the dullness of the room and the sudden vibrancy of her dress. Anxiously, she hoped Mr Blunt wouldn't point the fact out.

Her boss bent down, and she took the opportunity to glance curiously at the boy stood staring at Mr Blunt. What was he doing here?

Her attention was attracted to a heavy thump, and her eyes rested on a worn looking wooden box. Tilting her head to the side inquisitively, she waited for her commands.

A dismissive hand waved at the box. "Burn it."

The victorious look faded from Alex's eyes.

"Yes, sir." She said obediently, moving forward to pick up the box.

"No!"

Startled, she turned to face the child who had spoken- the word sharp in its desperation. Nervously, Miss Lacey glanced at Mr Blunt for directions, but he was ignoring her, intent on watching the child instead. Even Mrs Jones only gave her a small signal to wait and then went back to watching the boy, the folder she had been reading pressed onto her thigh. She wondered whether she should leave.

"Don't." Alex reigned in his emotion, straightening his face. "Don't." he repeated.

Mr Blunt quirked an eyebrow at him, and Alex struggled to hold back his trembling hatred for this man who tugged his life like he was some sort of dancing puppet. "It's our property, Alex. We can do what we like to it." He turned back to Miss Lacey severely. "Burn it." He ordered.

"No. Don't." Alex said fiercely.

The poor woman looked at a loss of what to do.

"Are you going to cooperate with us, and stop acting like a little child?" Mr Blunt drawled.

Coldly, Alex stared back. "You can't control me." _Yes he does, yes he does, _a little voice sang merrily inside his head. _You know he does, you just _love _rejecting reality!_

"Then, we have no need for your uncle's box. Burn it."

"No! Don't you dare-"

"This is a direct order Miss Lacey, take this box and burn it." He demanded to the close-to-tears woman.

Nodding shakily, the woman picked up the box, flinching as the teen told her to stop.

Alex watched wildly as the woman walked quickly to the door. Frantically, he pushed his hands through his hair, telling her to _stop _that that box was _special _that he _didn't have anything else! _But she was reaching for the door handle, pulling it open to _burn it, incinerate it, all of those secrets that could tell him what no one else would! He needed those secrets! He _needed _them-_

"Fine! OK! Please, I'll do it! Just- just- don't burn them!" he cried out, and he heard the singing voice inside him crow in triumph _I told you so! I told you so! You're like a dog! A mindless servant! You'll _always _be under someone's thumb!_

"Stop."

Miss Lacey actually was crying now, her shoulders shaking with her silent tears, swiping at her eyes with a pudgy hand. She was just a _desk _worker! Not some sort of _agent!_

Mr Blunt waved her over. "Put the box down."

Visibly shaking, she did so.

"Now, go."

Relief evident on her tear stained face, she complied, all but running out of the office and closing the door quickly behind her.

Alex stared at the floor.

Mr Blunt stared at Alex.

He hadn't had time, Alex realised, his fingers biting into the skin of his palms. Mr Blunt had purposefully put him into a lose-lose situation where he'd have no time to think of a clever way to get out of it; piling on the pressure until there was no chance for him to do anything else but agree- or have all of that fact burnt.

Raising his eyes from off of the carpet, he glared at the box.

Even from beyond the grave, Ian still was the cause of how trapped he was.

(_"Like a bird, Rid-)_

He screwed his eyes shut. He _knew_. He didn't need reminding _every five seconds!_ "What do you want?" he asked softly, dully, drained. He had no more energy to spend. He _needed _that box. In there might be the key to ending (_"there is no end, Alex. Only a beginning- just as there is no escape.") _all that had started in America.

Mr Blunt's lips twitched; and Alex wanted to scream in rage. "We'll call you soon."

Fear coiled into Alex's insides.

Another mission.

Another mission on top of all of this.

If Alex wasn't so composed, he might have swayed on his feet. As it stood, he hardly batted an eyelid, nodded once, and then gestured to the box- his stiff movements belying his tension and recently damaged limbs. "Can I have the box now?"

Mr Blunt gave him a frozen look. "No. When I deem you as obedient to us- then I will give you the box."

Alex swallowed, but kept his chin up. "Fine." He bit out.

Alan Blunt leant over his desk, fixing Alex with a too calm stare. "I know you know something that you're not telling us Alex," he whispered, and the hairs on the back of Alex's neck stood on end. He stared at him with that dead look in his eyes again. "But we know everything about you, Alex. There's nothing that you can hide from us for long."

He hid a shiver, keeping his eyes impassive. "Is that all?"

Mr Blunt kept his wide eyed stare trained on Alex for a moment longer before he nodded slowly. "Remember what you're risking, Alex. Good night."

The door shut, Alex not even bothering with a reply to that.

Mr Blunt stared at the door for a few moments longer before pressing the intercom on his desk. "Miss Lacey? In an hour, come up to the head office and have these documents burned."

Finishing, he looked up to see Mrs Jones watching him.

"Yes?" his eyes moved to his watch- it was getting late.

"Are you sure that's a good idea? If Alex finds out…"

"If Alex finds out, then there is nothing he can do about it." He interrupted. "Like it or not, Alex is now our property. We don't need to blackmail him with anything now. He being ours allows us to do anything we want to him and his life."

Mrs Jones paused before speaking again, slowly. "What if he turns on us?"

"He can't, Mrs Jones." He spoke like he was speaking to a child- minus the affection. "He is ours. Everything of his belongs to the most powerful Agency in Britain. And-" he turned stony eyes on her. "-do you really want Alex to read what's in that box?"

Mrs Jones prided herself on keeping a cool countenance.

But at that thought, she paled, one hand pressed against the wall as if to support her. "No." her voice was near hoarse.

Mr Blunt nodded slowly and stood up, flicking his fingers against on the lid of the box. "Then we're settled."

"Alex will hate us if he finds out." The words sounded stupid to even her ears. He already did hate them. Mr Blunt replied to this comment with only the briefest of his eyebrows twitching.

She cleared her throat. "We could lose him." It was her job to point out the certain holes in where things could go wrong- but not her job to argue to mend them.

One hand brushed lightly against the top of the box- Pandora's box, Mrs Jones thought, almost hypnotized by the movement of Mr Blunt's hand against the old wood. If that box was ever allowed to be opened, all of its demon's would come pouring out and would savage everything they had built- everything they had spent all those hard years, all that hard efforts- gone. Just like that. A blow on a dandelion puff and everything was lost.

"We knew what it would cost, Tulip." Alan Blunt spoke calmly, eyes examining the box sharply. "We knew what it would cost. And so is the price of a collar."

Mrs Jones closed her eyes and nodded softly. Alex's collar had cost too much.

They couldn't lose him now.

* * *

K-Unit, quite fairly, were tense when Cub finally came out of the room.

They _had _not so long ago just seen a woman run out from that very same room crying into her hands.

But Alex seemed fine. He glanced at them briefly, and then turned to lead the way through the hall.

Passing each other glances, they quickly followed after him, unwilling to give the kid a chance to escape.

The walk to their new car was silent, apart from the quiet arguing between the four adults on who would get to drive the car- a shiny new silver Mercedes Benz- and an upgrade from the one Fox had had before it had been destroyed.

Alex watched them as they argued, noting the way their shoves were so cheerful, their voices raised in mock- anger, never real anger.

His chest clenched.

This was a family.

Breaths became hard to get, he struggled to push air in and out of his lungs naturally. Another family- he didn't- _no, please, not again,_ he didn't ("_welcome home, Alex!" cold, painful hands. "Get him in. It's time he met the family") want _to! He wanted to be alone!

"I'm driving!" Fox crowed triumphantly, diving into the front seat.

"Are you OK, Cub?" Snake asked cautiously, noticing the way the teen stood stiffly, his face slightly pale.

Cub nodded. "I just feel a little sick." He whispered, eyes shutting.

Snake felt sympathy wash through him. Rebellious delinquent or not, this teenager had been through a hell of a lot- and hadn't even received the proper medical attention afterwards. "Hey, maybe you'd better sit by the window, then." He suggested kindly.

Cub agreed faintly, still with that disturbing paleness on his face.

Shooing him in to sit at the window seat, Snake sat alongside him, Eagle in the back too whilst Wolf sat in the front alongside Fox.

"And, off we go." Fox muttered, pushing the car into ignition.

Awkward quiet settled as the car began to move off along the road.

Cub seemed to just want to be left alone, and he sat with his forehead pressed against the slightly open window, eyes half shut and head turned away from them all.

The awkward silence settled more firmly down among them.

Eagle shot Snake a glance that very clearly cried _say something!_

"So…Cub…" Snake cleared his throat, scrabbling for something to say. "You, erm, feeling better?" he finally asked lamely, glaring at Eagle who mouthed _well done _to him.

"No." he murmured, eyes still half shut and voice transparent. "I need some air."

"Then wind the window down." Wolf suggested roughly, turning round to watch Cub.

Obediently (and for some reason, the thought of Cub doing something obediently caused alarm bells to set off in their heads) Cub, under the watchful eye of his new guardians, wound down the window and turned his face to it, seemingly revelling in the feeling of air rushing against his face as Fox drove down the empty street towards their new house.

"Better?" Eagle chirped, smiling at the back of Cub's head.

He hummed softly. "Not enough air." And before anyone could stop him, he pushed open the door- of the _moving _car- and seemed to step out.

Snake lunged for him, but only managed to grab the door.

Gazing wide eyed at each other, they gaped.

Had Alex just made his first escape attempt?

"Stop the car!" Wolf barked.

Fox slammed his foot onto the brakes.

"Eagle!" Wolf yelled; unlocking his seatbelt and pulling open the door of the now static car. "With me!"

Throwing open the car door, the two SAS men pounded after Alex, Ben turning the car on again, spinning round in an illegal U turn and driving after their departing bodies, teeth clenched and eyes furious. Before they had even _got to the house! _His hands clenched angrily on the steering wheel. He couldn't _believe _this kid!

Alex ran as hard as he could- wishing there were more turns to this road rather than it just being straight and flat tarmac- he was easy to spot.

Cursing as he realised the SAS men were catching up, he tried to move faster- his abused body screeching protests.

He was in no state to run off two angry SAS men.

As Alex forced his legs to move faster, he pondered over whether he should've waited a little longer before running. But he had wanted the element of surprise! They never would've expected it!

Gasping into his breaths now (he couldn't do it, it was pointless) he tried to run harder.

Eagle was the fastest member of his team- a fact he liked to rub in most people's faces. Sure, he noted as he outran Wolf, Cub was a good runner. In a few years time- maybe he'd be just as good as Eagle (though obviously, not better). So it was with a frightening languid speed that he caught up to Alex.

Cub spun around as Eagle reached him, turning his stumble into a fighting pose.

Eagle just threw the boy over his shoulder in a careless fireman's hold.

"Let go!" Cub yelled; squirming from over his shoulder, his hands clawing into Eagle's back as he was casually repositioned. "Put me down!"

Eagle would've sniggered at any other time at the sight of Cub wriggling and snapping at him- but not this time.

"Shut up, Cub." He said coolly.

Alex quietened.

Wolf reached them at the same time the car screeched to a stop by them.

Surveying Cub slung over Eagle's shoulders with no little amount of acid, Wolf pointed coldly to the car. "Get him in. And no window seat this time."

Screwing his eyes shut at the shame of it all, Alex didn't argue as Eagle walked him to the car and then put him into the car, clipping his seatbelt on with frozen efficiency before climbing in after him, Snake sparing him one poisonous and disgusted look before ignoring him completely.

Wolf then climbed in and shut the door, clipping his own seatbelt on as Fox started the car up again.

If the atmosphere had been slightly tense _before _this, then that was nothing.

It was positively _stifling _now.

Staring at his knees, Alex shrank slightly under the oppressive atmosphere of his new guardians who did not look at him, all staring stonily ahead, fury etched into the tenseness of their shoulders and spines.

Cursing softly in his head, ignoring the sing-songy voice that squealed _you're always trapped! Always trapped! _he sank further into his seat, dreading the confrontation when they got to their destination.

He wished the torturous car ride would go on forever.

* * *

**AN- Oh yeah! Take THAT! Done and dusted! Bwhahaha! Poor Alex. Have you ever been in that situation? (not jumping out of a moving car, hopefully) But that situation where you've done something and then the rest of the car ride his hell? Terrible situation to be in. Trust me- always be good. Works every time. Hmmm… anyway, my dear and sweet readers! Do leave a word! It's always very much appreciated! And hang on for the next chapter! Shan't be long, hopefully! Till next time!**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN- *Crash of lightening* IT'S ALIIIVVVVEEEE!**

** Yes, my dearies! Finally I have done this chapter! You don't UNDERSTAND how difficult I found it, so if it shows…sorry. YES! Oh, and if I haven't yet replied to your reviews, please wait! I really haven't had much time so far, and the time I have had is spent doing homework or trying to perfect this chapter. So hold on, and I'll definitely reply this time round! They were all so LOVELY and LONG and I was like- woah. Thank you! Please keep reviewing, and read on! Ps. This is a pretty long chapter- I got a little carried away when the ideas decided to come back from their holiday.**

**LAST THING! Make sure you read the AN at the bottom! It's important!**

**Disclaimer- I do not own any of Anthony Horowitz' characters and stuff. Gottit?**

* * *

Agent Barkwell tugged the heavy suede curtain aside at the sound of a car pulling up outside the house. Eyes following the vehicle as it came to a stop, he watched expressionlessly as the front car doors opened and two men climbed out, each tilting their head up to the sky and seeming to breathe in heavily.

Then, the other two doors opened and Agent Barkwell sucked in a harsh breath, his fingers tugging at the weighty material of the curtain, body tensing.

It was _him._

"They're here?"

For a moment, he ignored the obvious question and stood staring out of the window at _him- _the destroyer of _everything _good he had going in his life. The destroyer of everything he had worked for, everything he had spent all those _years for_.

For one horrible moment, Agent Barkwell had to swallow down angry tears.

"Yeah," He finally replied; hoping that the ragged edge of his voice was not recognisable to the other men. Pulling away from the window, he nodded grimly at them. "They're here."

* * *

"We're here."

Turning, Alex looked out of the window at the new house he'd be living in from now on.

It was large and white, panelled with pieces of dark timber, the windows arched and gleaming in the wispy evening light. The front garden seemed spacious enough, lined with pompous rows of flowers- some furled due to night that was soon to fox-trot into the sky and waltz the sun away.

Alex twitched at the sound of a car door opening and made no move to move as Eagle unclipped his seatbelt and gestured brusquely for him to get out.

Complying- seeing no other way or reason to do anything else- Alex slipped out of the car and into the relatively cool evening, ignoring his abused body as it wailed for retribution.

Something warm and _(human)_ firm and (_human) _soft and (_human)_ heavy and (_human) _strong and-

"Move,"

Snake's hand urged the still boy along towards the house, Wolf leading the way with Fox following; Eagle waiting for Cub to move.

Steadying his hissing mind at the contact, Alex moved forward.

The oiled swish of a gate opening drew his attention, and he almost frowned at the noise. It was too _quiet. _The one at home (_where is home? What is home? Have I got a-) _was squeaky, a comforting sound. His feet led him up the stairs, and again, unease stirred in his stomach _(so clean, no moss or mud or-) _but he pushed it down. He was being _unprofessional (what is there to be professional about?)._

And then suddenly he was inside the house, peering around him quietly, out of the corner of his eye watching as Wolf threw the keys to Snake and he locked the door behind him.

The tension was still shifting and sparking in the air.

Their eyes were cold.

So- so _cold._

Alex caught movement in the corner of his eye and noticed Wolf opening his mouth, ready to say something- to set the ball rolling, to-

(_"The first word is always power, Alex") _"I'm _sorry!" _he blurted out, eyes wide as they stared at Wolf, fearful guilt flooding into them. "I really am! I didn't- I mean, I did- I just, I can't- I want to go _home!" _he babbled, hands fisting and struggling not to rub at his eyes, his face flushing an upset pinky hue. In frustration, embarrassment colouring his cheeks further, he ducked his head, glowering at the floor in an attempt to avoid their eyes. "I don't know why people keep moving me around. I haven't done _anything! _I swear!" the last word cracked, and he desperately tried to hide it through clearing his throat.

Whatever words Wolf had been about to say curled up on his tongue.

Glancing around at the other baffled members- Wolf realised the same could be said for his other unit members.

His glare lowering to a confused stare, Wolf gazed at their youngest member. "What do you mean: you don't-"

"Don't believe him."

Wolf turned round sharply at the sound of the voice in the house and was about to move forward when one of them held up a hand and spoke to him- though his eyes, disturbingly, were fixed on Alex in some frantic clarity.

"Agent Barkwell, MI6." Was the crisp explanation, eyes finally flipping onto Wolf. "I was sent here to…_help, _with the explanations of Alex."

K-Unit exchanged looks.

What was _that_ meant to mean?

"I was Alex's fourth guardian."

Oh.

Well, that made more sense.

"I'm here with some others." Agent Barkwell nodded to the room he'd just come from. "We're all in here."

After a pause, where Wolf narrowed his eyes and examined the (intruder) Agent, he grunted grudgingly. "Well, I suppose we'll follow." gesturing to his men to follow Agent Barkwell into the room, Snake- more gently this time- urging a hunched up Alex along, who still looked embarrassed by his recent crumble.

Alex stepped after the retreating men.

This was _not _good.

His hands clenched at his side, mind whirring.

If he was right, when Agent Barkwell had said '"some others"', he meant his other guardians.

The ones he had successfully gotten away from.

He stepped into the room and saw them sitting there.

He also saw the looks they gave him.

This was definitely _not _good.

Snake watched the way the three Agent's eyes snapped towards Cub, all sitting alert with their bodies poised. He frowned, glancing at Cub who didn't seem to notice the attention, but was instead glancing around the room with childish curiosity at the simple chandelier, the tall glass lamp, fireplace and arched windows.

Smiling very slightly, Snake ushered Alex to go and sit in a chair near the tall glass lamp, careful not to let the teen sit by the window- unaware that rather than admiring the settings, Alex had been very meticulously assessing the best weapons in the room and escape routes.

Watching as the rest of the men settled down onto chairs- or, in Wolf's case- stood, Alex waited for someone to speak, cursing the fact that he'd already used his turn up- speaking now with all these figures of authority in the room would look odd and go against his cover of a scared and out-of-depth teen. Instead, he settled himself for looking small and wounded, staring at the fluffy cream carpet beneath his shoes.

He saw no need in taking them off.

He'd be leaving soon.

"Well?" Wolf asked impatiently, arms crossed. What was with these spies and their constant need for silence? Questions didn't answer themselves the last time he looked. "What have you got to tell us?"

One of the non-introduced agents looked up, his brows furrowing as if asking why Wolf had felt the need to break their carefully stored up silence. "It's about Alex."

"MI6 sent you, you said." Fox interrupted, urging them to hurry along.

"Yes," another said- a squat looking man with greying hair and blue eyes that moved at an irritating slowness. "About Alex,"

Another silence descended.

"Well? What have you got to say?" Wolf burst out angrily. What were they _waiting _for?

The three unnamed men gazed disapprovingly at him, but luckily, Agent Barkwell broke in, getting rid of the chance for Wolf to name them Dead, Dead and Deader. "He's lying to you."

Lying.

Alex stared at Agent Barkwell blankly.

What an awful word. So sharp, so bitter, so repugnant. (_"You're a liar, Alex!" sobbing, hands clawing. "A liar! I was stupid to ever trust you!") _He wasn't a _liar (liar, liar, pants on fire, hang them up on a telephone wire)_, liars were disgusting, cruel, horrible and- he wasn't a liar.

"What do you mean, he's lying?" Eagle asked slowly, Wolf dropping his crossed arms to stare harshly at Agent Barkwell.

"What I said," He retorted, eyes flashing. "We were sent here to point out a few things about Alex that may help you where we ourselves failed." He sucked in a harsh breath at that point, eyes swivelling back to land hardly on Alex, jaw tensing and voice quieting. "Number one: He's a good liar. He'll make you think he's sorry- that he's a weak little kid who only _'wants to go home'. _You'll start believing him," he turned sharply to face the listening K-Unit. "Because you're _human," _He spat the word out derisively- scornfully. "What human wouldn't feel sorry for a kid who was wrapped up in a world he didn't understand?

"Then you'll start to lower your guard around him- because he's only a kid, right? Before you know it, you'll be having fun. You'll think _hey, this job isn't so bad after all. _You'll think that _maybe, _maybe you've finally made friends with him- finally become companions. As soon as you think that- as soon as you get to be comfortable- he'll completely wreck your trust."

Agent Barkwell ignored the unit who tried to interrupt, his eyes focussed solely on Alex who was watching him now, something swimming in those acorn eyes of his. He leant forward, closer to Alex. This was no longer about informing K-Unit of Alex- this was about him and Alex. This was about showing this _cold _and _hard _kid just what he thought of him and his little stunts.

"The fact is," he hissed, hands gripping onto his knees as he glared at Alex. "The fact _is, _is that we're human. We act on human emotions; but this kid- this kid reacts differently. Why?" he jerked his chin back in sharp rage. "You've ruined my _job, _Alex. My _career. _I liked you- you know. I actually thought we got along well. But you- you don't act like a human- do you? You couldn't just simply _think about someone else for a change. _You had to wreck my life to better yours. What type of _monster _are you?" So what if his voice caught at the end? So what? His message had been put across. It was out in the open.

Who could catch a thousand feathers from the wind?

A _monster._

_ ("But…if I sleep here, then the monsters under the trees will get me…" fumbling hands, clumsy words. A cotton wool pause. "I'm not- I'm not scared…" don't _leave _me…don't don't- "…sorry") _Alex felt his vision blurring again at Agent Barkwell's words. He wasn't a _("d-don't! Please! I didn't-" rose petals fluttering to the ground) monster! _He wasn't a _monster! _He was just _("Alex Rider!" "Run! The kid's got a-""D-don't! Don't do it-!" "How can you sleep at night?")-_

"That's enough." Fox snapped, glaring at Agent Barkwell who finally pulled away from tearing into Alex and instead glared at the floor_. _Clenching his fists by his sides, he turned to Wolf who was frowning over the said words, distaste evident on his face- not having liked what was said, either.

"That was unprofessional." Wolf growled, eyes dangerous. "Now say what you mean properly."

The Agent didn't argue; looking entirely spent as he gazed at the patterns on the floor, his shoulders hunched and fingers wrapped comfortingly around each other. "One way Alex tries to escape is through you underestimating him, or gaining your trust."

Snake glanced at Cub who was now looking ahead rather than at the carpet, his eyes holding that same fuzzy quality to it that he had noticed after he had spoken to Mr Blunt in his office. "So," he didn't like what he had been told, and the thought of repeating it repulsed him. But if it was true… "You're telling us not to trust him?" he caught the way Alex's eyes moved up to him.

"Yes."

Waiting for a further explanation on that point, and receiving none, Eagle shook his head, rubbing one hand against his forehead in frustration. "We can't just talk about the id like he's not here. It's not right." He argued, turning to face Cub with doubt showing plainly through his eyes. "What do you have to say about this, Cub?"

What _did _he have to say about it?

His mouth went dry, eyes unconsciously moving to the lamp.

Did he have to- _admit to it_? Say: '_yes, I did lie to you'? _Or was he to shake his head vehemently and deny what had been said? Or maybe crumple up and shake his head slightly, stammering-stand up angrily and- _leave me alone! - _run, get- get _captured _and then fight and say _I'm sorry! I'm sorry, sorry, sorry, sorrysorrysorry because it wasn't my fault, wasn't my- _

_ Calm down and concentrate!_

Yes.

He needed to concentrate.

Absently, Alex pulled his gaze away from the lamp. "There's not much I can say." (_Don't make me say it, don't make me say it-)_

Eagle's eyes showed hurt briefly before he turned away, his expression hardening. "Go on." He kept his voice steady and controlled. "It seems that Cub isn't making any effort to defend himself here."

It was obvious that K-Unit were waiting for some sort of retort here, something to say that no, Cub was _not guilty (guilty, guilty, guilty) _and that Agent Barkwell was wrong about him.

Alex's eyes wandered back to the window.

Glaring at the side of Alex' head, he forced himself to ignore the teen. "Carry on." Wolf ordered sharply, refolding his arms and glaring stonily back at Agent Barkwell.

"I'll carry on from here."

K-Unit turned to face the new speaker- a dark skinned man who sat with his lips pursed in a frown. Nodding at the waiting unit, he gave his name. "Agent Lawson." His voice was surprisingly soft and warm sounding- despite the sour look on his face. "I was Alex's third guardian."

They nodded stiffly.

Agent Lawson sighed, his forehead creasing. "Look, I know you don't like that we're here and doing this, but it's the best way to do it." He turned to Alex, and it was difficult to read the expression that lay there. "I don't know what's going on with you, kid, but one thing I _do _know is that setting a house on fire isn't the way to do it."

K-Unit froze.

"He…set a _house _on fire?" Eagle asked dazedly, unknowingly acting as if Alex wasn't there.

"Yes." He nodded ruefully. "Knocked a candle over and ran."

"Were you…" awkwardly, Fox gestured to him, trying to get the question across without lowering the man's (most likely) already crushed pride.

Catching on, he smiled in ruefully. "Yes. But luckily I managed to get out."

Alex only stared at the man.

"Agent Twill- second guardian," The stout greying man said briskly, talking with a quick voice that said very clearly that he was not happy about having to do this. Turning sharply to the four men listening, he scowled at them. "He's a brat. He's shown that now. No, listen-" he barked as Fox attempted to rush him to his point. His eyes burnt. "This is important. You've got to watch him at _all _times. Don't ever trust him with anything. I let him alone for a while to watch TV, whatever. Next thing I know he's vanished. To this day, I still don't know how he did it- the sitting room doors were locked, windows locked-"

"You kept him in a locked room?" Snake asked slowly.

The man nodded shortly, unrepentantly. "Locked his arm to the sofa,"

"You did _what?"_

"Now you listen here." He broke in sharply, angrily, leaning forwards on his chair. "He attacked me on the second day. Rubbish at fighting- mind you- swung his arms all over the place- but he got me a nasty one in the eye. I'm telling you-"

"You locked a child to a sofa." Fox spoke- his voice deadly quiet- eyes glaring with ice. "A child."

"It was for his own safety." He snarled back, almost standing up.

"Shut up, both of you." Wolf snapped, stepping forward and drawing the eyes of everyone in the room. Pointing a finger at the next man, he ordered him to speak struggling himself not to turn and give the man a good one to his face. He just wanted this to be over now. Listening to all of these men's tales was making his head spin. "And what did he tell you?" he didn't care that his voice was louder than was deemed polite or necessary. Too many things had happened. He needed to grab a coffee, sit down, and talk about it all with his unit- minus one Cub.

Shooting a glance at a muttering Agent Twill, the last man acknowledged his head seriously to him. "I'm Agent Maxwell-" here, he paused in dry amusement. "Alex's first guardian,"

"We get that already." Eagle said bitingly, confusion making him sharp.

Luckily, Agent Maxwell did nothing but raise one eyebrow. "Cutting to the chase, I'd suggest you didn't eat 'shy' Alex's carefully prepared meals." He smiled grimly, leaning back into the chair he shared with the other four agents. "They seem to give you the amazing ability to drop to sleep _real _fast."

Noting the looks on their faces, the man laughed once, humourlessly. "He slipped sleeping pills into my food."

"Oh." Snake murmured, eyes wandering to Alex who sat silently, his hands positioned loosely in his lap.

And finally, he spoke. "Is that all?"

"What do you mean: 'is that all'?" Agent Barkwell too leapt out of his depressed silence, his eyebrows lowering dangerously.

Alex looked up at him.

Snake moved closer.

Gone was the desperate and homesick teenager (youth, boy, kid, child) that they had seen before. His eyes weren't shining with reluctant pain here, his jaw was not lightly shaking here and nor were his cheeks flushed in that unassuming shade of pink.

Cold eyes fixed themselves on the speaking Agent. "I mean," his voice was smooth. "Have you finished?"

Agent Barkwell's lips tightened. "I trusted you _("Don't trust anyone, Alex." He whispered, fingers trailing cobweb soft through his hair. "No one but me. Understand?" no, no- he _didn't _understand. He didn't-) _and believed in you, and you just tore that down." Agent Barkwell glared at Alex. "You've ruined my career. I was _moving up! _I was aiming to become a great Agent to serve my country; but now the heads don't even believe my aptitude in the job anymore! They think I'm weak- because of you!"

_("All because of you, Alex! It was _all _because of you!") _

"Enough!" Wolf snapped.

Everyone turned to face the angry leader.

"We're tired and hungry, and you're wasting our time! A teenager got one over you- get over it!" Fox smothered a smile. This was the Wolf he knew. Jabbing one forceful finger at Alex, he scowled at him. "Why did you run?"

Before Alex could answer, Agent Lawson broke in softly.

"The flowers."

Alex froze.

"What do you mean?" Eagle asked curiously, glancing at Alex who hadn't reacted to the revelation as far as he knew. "Flowers?"

All four Agents nodded in understanding, swapping looks. "Begonia flowers. If you ever get sent a package, you know he'll soon run."

"Who're they from?" Snake asked quietly, one hand gripping the back of the chair where Alex sat.

Four pairs of eyes stared widely back. "No one knows."

Snake frowned, glancing at Alex who hadn't moved- going strangely still at the mention of the flowers. The _agents _certainly didn't know, but Alex must have. He, after all, was the one who had run soon after seeing the objects- so that gave way to the fact that he must know who was sending them. Odd.

"Is that all?" Wolf asked roughly.

Swapping glances, all of them peering at Alex at least once, they nodded reluctantly.

"Good. Fox- show the men to the door."

Nodding, sparing a glance to Alex, he got up and led the men out of the room.

Wolf sucked in a huge breath when they were gone and they all heard the door click shut after a few murmured words. Pinching the bridge of his nose, Wolf peered at Alex cautiously.

He'd hoped, when the Agent's had begun to speak, he'd hoped that they'd clear up some of the fog from around Alex- make it easier to understand just who the kid was.

They hadn't.

If anything; they'd only raised more questions.

Fox stepped back into the room to see everyone with varying expressions on their faces watching Alex.

"You heard what they said," Wolf rumbled finally, breaking the silence and getting straight to the point. His hand fell away from pinching the bridge of his nose. "They told for us not to trust you." His eyes scoured Alex's face. "That was an interesting conversation- right, Cub?"

"I suppose it was." He answered easily, eyes flickering briefly to Fox who was gazing at him in _worry_. As if he _couldn't look after himself! _He _could! _He _could _look after himself! He didn't need their _concern, _their _understanding! _He was fine being _(darkness, trembling, chalky breaths. "I don't want to be-") _alone!

Wolf's eyes narrowed. "Cub…" he said slowly, as if testing the waters with one cautious word. "You do realise that by not defending yourself, we are going to have to take all of what the Agent's said into consideration- right?"

Curiously, he looked at them. "Of course." And Alex wondered why they all suddenly looked so disappointed.

"Well then," Wolf spoke slowly- heavily, his eyes fixed firmly on Alex's face- giving him a clear chance to cut in and tell him angrily how he'd never done any of those things- of how they were all lies. But Alex never did cut in. Instead he sat and listened, face never slipping from that (irritating! Why did it never-)unchanging mask of blankness.

Tensing his jaw, Wolf carried on, not turning as Fox came to stand alongside him. "Then there are a few things we need you to know."

_Things he needed to know?_

Satisfied that he had gotten Cub's attention he pressed on with his conversation. "Rule-wise. No leaping out of windows, no leaping out of cars, no running away, no setting fire to houses-" was it just his imagination, or had Cub's eyes blurred momentarily there? "-and more importantly-" here his eyes darkened, posture becoming more imposing and voice deepening. "-_no _lying."

No lying?

That meant- that meant no-no _stories _right? No- no places where he could pretend he was _normal. _Where he could- where he could pretend to be- to be- no _lying._

Fingers flicking against the side of the chair he was sat on, Alex tried vainly to comprehend what he had been told.

No _lying._

_ But it's not lying that you do, _something whispered soothingly, all golden chimes and silken tones, _its _storytelling. _You weave a story. Whether or not people want to live your story is of no consequence or matter to you. You only weave the thread and wear it- they're the ones who remark on its beauty- not you._

His fingers stopped twitching, body relaxing.

That was right.

He never _lied._

"OK," he nodded serenely. "I won't lie."

K-Unit watched him scrupulously, eyes examining and _desperate _to believe in his words. With a flutter of something Alex had not felt in what felt like (days, months, years) ages, his breath caught tight in his throat. What _was _that feeling? Wriggly, uncomfortable, nagging- (_"Did you break my new vase, Alex?" a tinny call up the stairs; a shuffle of feet, flap of hair, blush of the cheeks. "S-sorry, Jack.") _Ah- yes. That was it.

Guilt.

But what did he have to be guilty about? He wasn't _lying _to them. He was just- just not being completely _truthful, (isn't that the same as-) _just not telling them everything, _(still, isn't that the same as-) _he'd never _(liar, liar, pants on-) lie _to them.

"Good," Wolf's voice was quiet- quieter than Alex was used to hearing it. He looked _relieved; _Eagle was smiling at Alex with the air of an unburdened person. "We're trusting in you Alex."

His breathing stopped.

_(Harsh voice, soft like the sea, fingers digging, biting, pressing into skin, desperate; rough. "We're trusting you, child."Wintery soft breaths, folding like a leaf, linen face. "I trust you, Alex." "I'm trusting in you, Rider." "Don't fail me.") _"I won't." and his voice _did not _crack; his hands _were not _gripping into the chair as if it wanted to push him off, to abandon him, to him _hurt _him, to _leave-_

"What are you talking about?"

Snap of the chains.

Back to reality.

Coolly, he turned his brown eyes onto Eagle who had spoken. "I meant that you can trust me."

Cub's voice was smooth, so easy and confident that Eagle found himself nodding even before he was consciously aware of himself doing so. Stopping quickly, he fixed Cub with a sharp gaze- uncertain of whether or not to believe him.

Calmly, Cub gazed back.

A little unsettled, Wolf cleared his throat, noticing the way Fox shifted by his side in disquiet, his arms folded and fingers creating anxious staccato on them, gaze never staying still. Promising himself to question (drill, interrogate) Fox on his obvious jumpiness later, Wolf focussed for now on the task at hand- jumping straight into the next issue. "We're going for a nice walk and picnic in the park tomorrow."

Alex raised his eyebrows, wondering how anyone could manage to make such pretty words turn into something so dangerous sounding.

Gritting his teeth as he caught Alex's sceptical look, he spat out the rest of his message from him (not much) and (mainly) Fox, Snake and Eagle- ignoring Snake who silently and forcefully told him to _make it sound nice! _He wasn't a _'nice' _guy, dammit! He didn't _talk _or _giggle _about what to place in the picnic hamper or which _blanket _there were going to park their backsides on! So it was only _fair, _he reasoned grumpily, that his voice in talking about picnics sounded more like he was talking about how they were going to singlehandedly storm an enemy base using only a pair of rusty tweezers and that _dratted _picnic blanket (what was wrong with good old grass anyway?!) "We'll be leaving here at twelve to get to the park. We'll eat lunch there and then walk around. If you're allergic to anything, you'd better tell us now- we're packing the hamper tonight."

"I'm not." He said quietly, half watching Eagle roll his eyes at him and watch Wolf who looked just about ready to kill someone.

"Good," he paused. "Because I like chicken."

Alex, Fox, Eagle and Snake stared at wold, all wondering what that had to do with _anything._

Pushing his shoulders back like nothing out of the ordinary had happened- although Eagle was laughing manically into a pillow Snake had crushed into his face- Wolf glared down at Alex.

"Why?"

"Why what?" Wolf asked impatiently.

Sighing in well hidden exasperation, Alex tried again, the rest of K-Unit listening in- they'd better- it was obvious that Alex wasn't an idle talker. "Why are we going on a picnic?" the words tasted foreign in his mouth; clumsy and unused. "Is something going to happen? Did Mr Blunt and Mrs Jones tell you to go?" now that was better. Suspicious, hard and fixed with reinforced chains to reality.

Blankly, K-Unit stared at him.

Voice only displaying mild irritation, Alex shifted in his seat. "What?"

Snake shook his head slowly, eyebrows frowning in confusion, hands dropping away from the pillow he'd recently had smashed into Eagle's face. "It's not that, Alex."

"It's for fun." Eagle said.

And the words sounded so _right _in _his _mouth.

So light. Like balloons _("you don't need them") _and bubbles _("Put that _down, _Alex! You're not a child!") _and flying kites in the sky _("Not today.")_! Why did it sound so-?

"Fun?" he repeated, voice flat. "Fun." He tried again, mouth awkwardly trying to mimic the way Eagle had said it. No. No! That wasn't _right! _It had to sound light! It had to sound like balloons and bubbles and _flying kites! _Those big red one with the tassels- the- the ones you needed two hands _("Slide around the throat and apply pressure- both hands, Alex. And…squeeze…") _to hold steady and the string _("Tight around the wrists- it makes it harder to break free") _silver and bright and-

"Yeah, Cub. For fun," Eagle tried to gin at him, to catch Cub's eyes that were locked elsewhere.

The look washed out of Alex's eyes and he looked at them all again. "OK."

Snake swallowed nervously in the crippled silence. Realising that no one else was stepping up to break it, he leant forward, trying to shake the feeling that when he spoke to Alex he had to do it gently, _softly. _"Maybe I should show you your room- you've had a rough day." Very purposefully, he let his eyes land on the purpling bruise on Alex's chin.

Absently, he pressed a hand against it. "Yeah," he stood up, ignoring the way his body protested- as if it had heard Snake's words and wanted to noisily remind him of his once temporarily muffle discomfort. "Thank you."

"No problem. Wolf?"

Nodding shortly, their leader stepped back. "You go- Fox too." His eyes slid to Alex who rolled his eyes- understanding that this was a way of trying to (not very subtly) guard him. Frowning at Alex's obvious show of annoyance, he turned to Eagle. "Come on. Help me unload the car of our stuff."

Wolf watched as Cub followed Snake up the stairs, wondering vaguely why Alex hadn't wanted to know where his things were.

"Come on, oh mighty leader," Eagle called, already putting on his shoes.

And that was another thing.

"Cub! Don't forget to take off your shoes!" he yelled up the stairs.

* * *

"And this is your room."

Alex's eyes flickered around it. Big enough if he was ever attacked- enough space to manoeuvre around in. The curtains looked like they'd come off easily enough, the bed looked easy to move. The only window was small _(he couldn't _breathe! _He couldn't _breathe! _He was going to die in here, in this airless room! He was trapped. Trapped, trapped, trap-) _and locked- though the lock looked easy enough to pick should he ever need to.

"Thanks." He nodded, stepping in and placing his shoes _("Come on, Alex! I can't believe I'm asking you to be at least a little disorganised.") _carefully under the bed.

Mumbling an acknowledgement, Snake tried to rid himself of the whining and tugging thought that told him teenagers should pull apart the size, colour and look of the room- and through doing so, would make the room their own. Cub's eyes had swept mechanically over the expanse of it, nodded and stepped into the room like he was _visiting _it. As if it wasn't _his. _

"Well…I'd better go and unpack myself." His voice held doubt. He gestured to the cupboards with a jerk of his chin. "All of your stuff should already be in there, so…" his voice trailed off and wandered aimlessly about the room, struggling to find a way to end the conversation. "Will you be OK?" he ended up finishing weakly.

Alex's lips twitched into something that could chalk up to the semblance of a mockery to a smile. "I'll be fine, thanks."

Grunting in understanding, Snake left before he could question the bubble empty words behind Cub's '"thanks"'.

Moving to the centre of the room and absently playing with the curtains _(blue) _he called out softly: "Can I help you?" his fingers glided over the material (_soft. Blue.)_

Ben Daniels shook his head even though he knew Alex wouldn't be able to see it as his back was turned. "It's a nice house, isn't it?" he asked instead, looking around at the cream walls, green curtains and green quilted bed.

He hummed in vague agreement, still tugging on the _(soft. Blue. Sturdy) _material of the curtains, knowing that Ben hadn't decided to wait here to discuss pointless things like the beauty and décor of the new house.

"Do you like the colour of the curtains?" Ben asked, smiling fondly at the back of Alex's head- relieved he _did _have a childish side to him after all.

_Does it matter? _"Yes," he answered. _(Blue, soft and sturdy)_

Ben Daniels stepped next to Alex, nodding. "Yeah, green's one of my favourite colours."

_Green._

Vacantly, Alex finally turned to him. "Green?" his fingers still rubbed against the _(b-blue. _Soft, _sturdy. It was definitely-) _curtains.

Bemused, Ben smiled back. "Yes, green."

Ah.

_This isn't your room, Alex, _an angry voice hissed, grabbing a violent hold of his drifting mentality. _Get a grip!_

His hands fell away from the curtain as he nodded solemnly back. "What's up?" he changed tact. _Forget about the curtains! _His mind snapped angrily. _The curtains don't matter! _

But they did.

They really, _really did. _Because they were the curtains Jack had moved whilst hollering unnecessarily (because Alex was already up) to get out of bed. Those were the curtains that Ian had let him pick. Those were _his _curtains. _His. _He- he didn't own enough to let anything go now.

Ben Daniels shifted, unaware of Alex's thoughts. He began carefully, eyes trailing to the clock on the wall. "I was just thinking that it had been a long while since I last saw you," his eyes wandered unwittingly back to Alex. "How are you holding up?"

Alex narrowed his eyes, assessing the look in the MI6 Agent's eyes, his posture, his muscle twitches. It told him all the things he was hiding it told him just what the Agent's real motive was. It told him-

Nothing.

Ben Daniels was hiding _nothing. _

"Alex?"

Unconsciously, he took a step back, hands drifting up to latch onto the _(blue! It had to be-) _curtains as he did.

How could he be hiding _nothing?_

Ben frowned, becoming worried when Alex didn't answer his call. He became even more concerned when Alex took an obviously defensive step backwards; his eyes holding confusion in their churning and yet empty depths.

"Alex!"

And the look was gone.

"I'm fine." Was the mechanical response.

Ben stared at the teen who stared back. He wanted to grip the child's shoulders and say _no you're not! Tell me what's wrong! _And ruffle his hair and tell him that _it was going to be OK._

But he didn't know _why _he felt the need to say or do something like that.

And the look in Alex's eyes clearly challenged him against doing anything like that.

So he didn't.

And, like most spies did when they hit a warning ground; he changed tact. "It's meant to be sunny tomorrow, you know."

_More of a chance of general laziness, more people out and about, tiring quicker whilst running and sluggish movements and reaction times. _"About time," he huffed.

Smiling, relieved at Alex acting (was it, though) normally, he laughed. "That's England for you," glancing at the clock again, he turned to face Alex. "Are you-"

"Fox! Stop messing around and come and help with dinner!" Wolf bellowed up the stairs.

Pulling a face at Alex, Ben made his way to the door. "I was about to ask whether you were hungry, but-"

"Fox!"

"I'm coming!" he yelled back, rolling his eyes as Alex chuckled before catching himself. "Sorry, Al. There are some files on your bed; they've got the whole cover story sorted out in them- have a look." Grinning one more, he left the room hurriedly to rush down the stairs where Alex could hear him complaining to Wolf to _stop stressing._

Turning his attention to the folder on his bed (thin, thank goodness), Alex settled down _(never too comfortably, never too-) _on his bed and began flicking through them.

* * *

"Do you think this'll work?" Snake murmured as he sat downstairs, a coffee clutched in his hands, eyes flicking up to the ceiling every now and again- as if he had the power to see through it and check on Alex.

Tiredly Wolf shrugged, gulping at his drink. "I don't know what to think anymore." He admitted, glancing at all of them minus Cub who at that time was sleeping in his room. Eyes dropping to the cup, he stared into the liquid. "He's…changed. I think time will only tell us how to treat him."

"So speaks Wolf. Listen and obey." Eagle chanted, kneeling to the floor.

A pillow in his face shut him up.

"I believed him before." Snake murmured- looking lost in his thoughts, his blue eyes staring and faraway. "He looked so _weak _then. You know? But when they told us all of that- he just…" irately, he rubbed at his chin, frustrated that the words he wanted to say just_ weren't _coming out right. "I don't want to believe it." He finished haltingly.

Wolf drummed his fingers in an offbeat against the side of his mug. "I don't know what to believe. We're told that we're protecting him- but we don't know what from. We're told not to trust him- MI6 says he's just rebellious. What are we even _doing?_"

"We've got to act like a family. This isn't going to work if everyone isn't cooperating." Eagle pointed out, finally done with pulling feathers out of his mouth. Juggling the once-thrown pillow around in his hands, he glanced up at them all. "Something weird's going on. And they're not telling."

No one bothered to ask who 'they' were. It was obvious.

"Fox, you've worked with Special Ops before," Snake turned to his old teammate seriously. "Have you got any ideas?"

Shaking his head angrily, Ben dragged one hand over his face. "Trust me. If they don't want you to find something out- then you're not going to find it out."

A pause passed.

"So, we're working blind, then?" Eagle asked after the lull.

Wolf glanced sharply at him and then turned back to his drink, tipping the mug back to his mouth harshly.

"Yeah, we're working blind."

* * *

Flicking on the light switch to his room, Alex peeled off his damp clothes with a grimace, shrugging on a new one in expert speed- disliking having his vision blocked for long.

_Did I _seriously _fall asleep? _He wondered as he closed the folders carefully and stored them away in discretion in the top of his new cupboards until K-Unit asked for them back. Rolling out his shoulders, a disturbing revelation hit him.

He must be feeling _really _comfortable.

Comfortable enough to fall asleep defencelessly and not even wake up once. With growing unease, he realised he probably hadn't even woke up when K-Unit had come in (they had come in. It was 3:19AM, way past dinner and the door wasn't closed properly- the work of someone who was afraid of inadvertently causing a loud noise- probably Eagle) to check on him.

Swinging open the door a little harder than necessary, Alex stepped out into the dark hallway, ignoring the wintery shake to his hands.

He needed to _stop thinking._

Body tense and _oh so _wary of that sulky hunger complaining in his stomach, intent on satisfying his hunger- the thing which had probably woken him up from his sleep in the first place.

Trudging softly down the stairs, eyes alert, Alex trailed his hands lightly against the banisters, ears tuned to any sound that could alert him of not being_ (scared, frightened, all by myself, so-) _alone.

Just as he reached the last three steps, Alex stopped, body tensing.

Soft voices filtered through the half open door of the living room.

Closing his eyes, he let his tense breath go.

It was just K-Unit.

For a moment, Alex pondered on whether or not to go upstairs again and just wait until morning glided back into the sky. Eyes wandering to the door where the noise was softly falling out from, he wondered whether he could deal with all that…contact.

The decision was made for him.

The door swung open suddenly, and Eagle stepped out laughing. "I'll go and get some more-" he stopped mid-flow, eyes widening as he spotted Alex stood watching him (was that _wariness _in his eyes? What did Cub have to be-) from the bottom three stairs, one hand resting against the banister as if he had just been about to drift down the remaining obstacles. "Cub?"

"I think so." Alex replied dryly, finally floating down the stairs to meet Eagle, his acorn eyes never leaving Eagle's own. "What are you doing up so late?" his voice was quiet, but audible. It always was. Never too loud and never too quiet- as if he was straining on perfection.

Eagle didn't like it.

He watched as Cub came to a quiet stop in front of him- not too close, but not too far away. Teenagers should be clumsier- they were, after all, learning about the world, reaching eagerly out to learn and climbing steadily up into the world of adults. They _weren't _adults. No, they were still children who had their immature moments and moments where they liked to pretend to be mature and understand the machinations of the world. But Cub…Cub fit into none of those categories. He was neither child…nor adult. He was just…Cub. _Alex Rider._

"You're asking _me _what _I'm _doing up?" he retorted finally, folding his arms over his broad chest and peering critically down at Cub. "I should ask _you _what _you're _doing up! It's really late you know, and you've had a pretty hectic day." His eyes wandered to the purple bruise on the kids chin.

Alex raised his eyebrows minimally. "Same could go for you." He replied smoothly.

Rolling his eyes, Eagle stepped aside, leaning back to yell into the living room. "Cub's up, Snake!"

"What?" came the furious reply, and Alex took a wary step back as Snake burst through the door and glared at him, taking in his barefooted appearance and ruffled hair. "You should be in bed, Cub! You need to rest!"

"Cub's up?" came Fox's surprised voice, and yet again, another head popped round the doorframe. Catching sight of the teen, a slow smile spread across Fox's face. "Well, come in then!"

"Don't encourage him, Fox!" Snake snapped, smacking his too-slow-at-retreating head. "He's only a kid, and he needs to rest after all of what's happened to him!"

"I'm fine." Alex interjected, glancing at Snake. "Seriously."

Eyes narrowing, Snake took a step forward. "What are you doing up now, anyway?" he asked suspiciously, though worry showed clearly through his lilac blue eyes.

_("Oh, Alex…try and go back to sleep, OK? I'll sit right here…yes, I know you're fourteen, but it's better than you wandering around at night…I'm right here…no, I won't leave you…promise.") Liar._

"Couldn't sleep." He shrugged, ignoring the _heavy heavy heavy _feeling in his chest that had _nothing _to do with his old bullet scar. Waiflike thoughts that refused to stay _down _and _(trapped! They all wanted to trap him! They all-) _locked away! Why couldn't they just- "New place, you know."

Nodding solemnly, Eagle patted Cub on the shoulder, not noticing the way Alex's eyes followed the movement sharply. "We can get that. Hey, look, come and join us guys. We're just talking and stuff, you know- fun."

Blankly, Alex stared back before wiping the expression away as he saw Eagle's smile dropping. Filling his eyes with what he hoped looked like hesitant gratitude, he nodded, lips twitching up into a _(the lips curl, then the eyes narrow slightly, you have to make it look _real, _like you actually are smiling when really all you want to do is cry or scream or laugh or- you never _know- _you never-) _smile. "Thanks, I will."

Relieved, Eagle nodded, walking away to go and grab some more drinks from the kitchen.

Snake sighed in resignation, wondering slightly at the slip of _something _into Alex's eyes before he had smiled- that disquieting _emptiness. _As if he didn't quite know what to do- how to react. "Fine," Pushing the thoughts aside, he waved Alex in, Fox grinning beside him. "But you really do need your sleep, Cub."

Nodding distractedly, Alex passed them, Snake ushering him along.

Wolf looked up and nodded shortly as Cub walked in. "Morning," he said gruffly.

"Morning," Alex replied, sitting down on the floor in a loose and unthreatening position- but ready to move as soon as he needed to.

"Couldn't sleep?" he asked, looking sharply down at the kid.

"No." Alex returned.

"Hm," He nodded coarsely. "Tough day,"

"Tough day." He repeated quietly.

Fox watched the interaction amusedly, noticing the way they settled into a comfortable silence soon after, Cub tugging at the loose carpet fluff on the floor near Wolf's feet, and Wolf sipping on his mug of coffee.

"Are you hungry?" Snake asked, standing up. Alex opened his mouth to reply, but he waved him off, moving towards the door. "Forget it. I know you are. I'll go and get you something light to eat."

Murmuring thanks, a little wary of the kindness shown to him, he nodded.

"So, Cub, what've you been up to recently?" Eagle asked brightly, comforted by the warm atmosphere.

Alex tried for another _(pull of the lips, carefully now, careful, make it real-) _smile. "Nothing much,"

"School, yeah?" Snake chipped in, trying his best to shrug off the thought that _something just wasn't right._

"Yeah," the lie slipped easily (too easily) out from his mouth. "School," That was a nice thought. Acting like a normal teenager. Hesitantly, he enlarged his story. "I'm doing my GCSE's now, so that takes quite a bit of time for revision, but I haven't really had much time to revise with, you know. Stuff." Limply, he shrugged.

Nodding sympathetically, Fox leant in to look at Alex and asked _very casually: _"So, do you know why we're protecting you?" noticing Alex's sharp look, he backtracked quickly. "No, I'm not being nosey. It's just that it'll be easier to protect you if we know what to protect you from." The rest of K-Unit nodded in agreement.

Struggling to swallow a frantic yell that it _wasn't their business!- _Alex shrugged uncaringly. "I don't know. No one's telling me anything."

"So…those people who were shooting at you?"

Indifferently, Alex gazed at him. "Which ones?"

_Which ones._

Fox leant back nervously.

Was that really such a loaded statement, or was he just being overly paranoid?

"The ones from when we were in the car." Snake answered after realising Fox was no longer really listening to the conversation. Flicking his eyes over to him, Snake crumpled his brow in a soft frown. Fox was had become a lot more thoughtful after joining MI6.

Absently, Alex tugged at the carpet fluff and shrugged. "I don't know," he replied honestly _(how long has it been?). _Because really, he didn't know, did he? It could be _anyone. _Just like _he _said. It could be _anyone. _His eyes slipped over the watching four men. It could even be _them. _"Whoever gave me the need for protection." He couldn't quite swallow the sarcastic ring to his voice, and he looked down quickly.

Choosing to ignore the obvious barbed comment, Wolf shook his head seriously at the rest of his unit as they opened their mouths to ask questions. Cub was like a hedgehog- ready to pull back and spike you at the first sign of danger. What danger, he didn't know.

"Well…it's over now." He said instead, though there were many other things that he wanted to ask, now just was not the time. "Which school do you go to?"

Alex paused, staring at his hands. School. He'd almost forgotten about that. It seemed such a long time ago... it was part of a distant life that he wasn't too sure he was part of anymore. "Brooklands," He said softly, testing the word in his mouth.

"Brooklands?" Eagle repeated, swapping a confused glance with the rest of his unit. Wasn't that an ordinary public school? He'd have thought Cub would have been sent somewhere…more posh.

Choosing not to voice his opinion, Eagle smiled and said instead: "Do you know when you'll be going back to school?"

"When they say it's safe, I suppose," He muttered, disliking this conversation. It wasn't _normal _to be talking about school and _what he'd been doing. _It wasn't _right. _It didn't fit into anything of which he'd been living in the past year. It was just too mundane. Simple. Ordinary. AS if _he _was simple and ordinary when really, he _wasn't._ "What about you? What have you been up to?"

They didn't seem to notice the tactful change of topic, and they launched eagerly into their tale, laughing and shoving and telling jokes that Alex didn't quite get but still _(pull the lips…that's right) _smiled at anyway, settling back and just listening.

Ben Daniels watched as Alex watched Eagle animatedly tell a tale of Wolf getting stuck in a tree whilst parachuting, the object of the laughs scowling and snapping at Snake to stop laughing. Thoughtfully, he tugged his fingers through his red curls, watching Alex through half hooded eyes; trying to figure out just what he found so…wrong about him. Odd- as if- no- what _was _it? It was like he was looking at an illusion- the ones with all the dots, and the longer you stare at it, you manage to find out what the real hidden shape was. But, Alex was like one of the really _difficult _illusions. You squinted and frowned at it for ages- thought you'd found the real shape- only to realise that it was a misleading one after all.

He just couldn't work the kid out.

Watching as Alex laughed gently as Snake slapped Eagle over the back of his head, he blinked steadily. Alex had been OK as he had hugged the child (teen, whatever) after that mission he had had not so long ago (what had he even been _doing _there?). He'd seemed…_normal _then. As normal as a teenager who could kayak down a waterfall and win a Tai boxing match was. But now…Cub looked up and caught his eye, something flashed in their briefly- a sort of condescending _understanding _of what he was trying to do.

Frowning, Ben didn't stop staring even as Alex raised his eyebrows minutely and turned back to watching his unit, the _look _gone from his eyes. It was almost as if (dare he say it) the boy was no longer Alex.

As if he had died.

But that wasn't right, he told himself, moving out of the way of a flying missile of an empty Cola bottle. There he was, breathing, smiling, _running, _listening and watching. But there was nothing _there. _He was (un)sure of it. What else could it be?

"Why are you up, though?" Alex's voice burst Ben out of his thoughts.

Wolf turned his eyes down to him. "We _are _adults, you know," he said dryly, speaking into his cup haughtily.

Alex turned and looked round at them. Eagle nodded his head in solemnity, feathers (Alex suspected a pillow fight) waving in his hair as he did so; Fox sat in the corner of the sofa, unable to keep that cheesy smile off of his face as he caught what Alex was gazing at, and Wolf…Alex eyebrows raised minimally, eyes drifting to the mug held in the leaders hand.

Pieces clicked into mind.

No heat, no smell, hands wrapped around it in the wrong way.

Wolf wasn't even drinking coffee.

It was…his eyes caught sight of the liquid as he tipped it up to his mouth again.

_Ribena._

And although his mind whispered harshly at him to remain quiet, indifferent and watchful- he just couldn't help it. A small part of _Alex (who was that? Who _am _I?) _who still urged him nervously to do _ordinary _things finally pushed him. His lips quirked. "Feathers, grinning, and Ribena," He placed a contemplative finger on his chin, a warm and squirming feeling threatening to escape from the cavities of his chest and out of his mouth. "Are you _sure _about that?"

They blinked at him.

Fox burst out into fits out uncontrollable laughter, slapping a hand over his mouth in a half-hearted attempt to stifle the laughter.

Eagle swung his head around in confusion. "Feathers?" he asked in confusion.

Still laughing hard, doubled over, he gasped. "Forget that!" Fox waved Eagle off. "Ribena? I _knew _you weren't drinking coffee!"

Finally, it dawned on Eagle, and he spluttered through his laughter. "Wolf's drinking _Ribena?" _he landed his back on the floor, laughing hard.

Wolf's face was turning an alarming shade of red, his mouth flapping in mortification and glaring at Alex who looked away quickly. "What's wrong with Ribena?" he yelled defensively.

That set them off even more, and they laughed louder and harder, Snake coming in to hand Cub his food. Hearing what they were laughing at, he too soon was spluttering in breathless laughter, Wolf snapping and growing ever redder in the corner.

Alex watched all of this in tentative interest.

The noise was…comforting. _Safe ("Don't allow yourself to-")_

And for once- he told the voice to shut up and for once, he allowed himself to let go, to join in. Catching Fox's eye, his mouth curled up almost hesitantly, eyes crinkling as he laughed.

* * *

Molten gold washed soothingly over the grass and ground, birds singing tinny hymns up to the adorned in blue silk heavens. Alex ran his eyes across the park, at the group of men playing cricket, a group of women politely applauding them from underneath a tree. A woman and her husband played and cooed at their baby carried on her chest, and a couple sat on a bench- lost to the world.

All in all, it was beautiful and seemed perfect.

Then _why _could Alex not shake the feeling that something was going to happen, that he was _missing _something? Frowning, he tried to scan the area for possible threats, but lost his concentration at the sound of K-Unit squabbling yet _again._

"Did you remember the picnic blanket, Wolf?"

"Why do we need it, anyway?"

"Because we need to get into the spirit of picnicking!"

"Is that even a word, Fox?"

"It is now."

"You could've at least chosen a better colour!"

"What's wrong with tartan?"

"Nothing, Snake."

"Good."

"Hey! Why's Cub carrying the hamper basket?"

"Why not? He's the youngest."

"_And _he'd the one who leapt on top of a car and _out _of a car."

"You reap what you sow."

"Take the hamper, Eagle."

"_What?_"

"Cub, you can- Cub?"

Alex shook his head, blinking. "I'm fine."

Ben frowned at him. "You sure?"

Shortly, he nodded, allowing Snake to peel the _(pretend it's heavy) _hamper out of his hands and shove it unceremoniously into a whining Eagle's arms. "Yeah,"

Still looking doubtful, Fox turned to Wolf who seemed to have decided on a spot in the park near a copse of trees. "Here?"

Wolf nodded with the grim satisfaction of a mountaineer who had found where to place his flag. "Here."

"_Finally," _Eagle muttered. "Right, Cub?"

Softly, distracted, Alex agreed.

Furrowing his brows, Eagle watched as Cub trailed after Snake to help pull the picnic basket out.

Still thinking, Eagle dumped the hamper on the ground and absently kicked at some twigs on the ground. Las night had been…fun. After the Agent's had told them 'all about' Alex, he'd been wary- even suspicious of the kid. They had, after all, been told some of the things Alex had done. This coupled with the startling and worrying lack of background info on Cub caused for a dangerous case- one Eagle had not been too keen on hacking.

When Cub was in Mr Blunt's office, they had spoken softly about how they were going to work this new situation- how they were going to help _Cub, _their _teammate. _Sure, they may have acted like idiots to the kid the first time round- but who could really blame them? That was a kid in an adult's world. A kid who would rebuff any attempt to find out _why _he was there. A kid who didn't _belong _there.

But that was in the past. They'd devise the idea of picnic to bond a bit- learn how to get along. Food usually patched up issues that talking sometimes couldn't. So when Alex had come down the stairs and into the living room at 3 in the morning, Eagle had been ready for a tense silence, halting conversations and awkward looks. What he _hadn't _been ready for was laughter and chatting late into the night until one by one, they all dropped off.

Eagle found he was smiling at the memory.

But now…Cub seemed _distant. _And if the fun they'd all had- becoming _friends _had never even happened.

"OK, everyone! Sit!" Wolf ordered, ignoring the irritated looks his teammates shot him.

Sitting down, Alex tugged at the grass with his fingers, pretending not to notice that Eagle was watching him carefully.

He'd made a stupid mistake by attempting to relax with them.

He'd let his guard down completely for the first time in weeks. _Months. _(Years?) He'd actually believed for a second that maybe- maybe he could be their friends. And maybe _(shut up! Just-) _maybe- _(don't say it! Don't ever _think _it!) _their _family._

Something clicked inside him.

A thousand hissing thoughts tore through his head; screaming at him, shoving him, shaking him, bellowing at him. And then Ian was there telling him something that _(no-no-! I don't-) _telling him something- _9I don't want to remember! Don't make me-)_

_ NO!_

The thoughts froze.

Mentally panting, immaterially on his hands and knees, he shook his head. No family. He wouldn't- he wouldn't- he'd _promised (I've been a good boy, Ian! I promise. Cross my heart and hope to die)_

No family- no- he wouldn't-

He'd keep his distance. He _would._

"Chicken, Alex?"

Snapping around, his eyes landed on the offered food, and then Wolf.

"Thanks."

And the picnic meal began.

Chewing on his food, Alex knew that the others had noticed that he was acting more detached than last night. He _knew _the others had noticed, but he ignored their concerned and disappointed _(he'd done it again. Why did he- why did he always have to make people so-) _looks they gave him and responded politely but vaguely to the ways they attempted to involve in the conversation.

It was _better _that way.

Suddenly, the small nagging feeling that he'd ignored so far flared up furiously.

**_Danger! Danger!_**

The sudden scream in his head jerked Alex out of wherever he was.

Being careful not to alert K-Unit to his suspicions, he feigned looking curiously around the park to try and determine where the danger was coming from.

A couple on a park bench, a group of men playing cricket, a couple with a baby, an elderly couple, a group of women…his eyes snapped back to the elderly couple. His eyes tore them apart in a matter of milliseconds.

_The man's back isn't really crooked, he straightens up every now and then- they're both wiping at their faces, warm outside- makeup? Their steps are too confident although they're hobbling- the man isn't pressing down on the top of his cane- a weapon? - The woman keeps looking around; they're not walking too close together- another room to move quickly._

His eyes flashed food in his hand forgotten.

_Age: Young (late 20's or early 30's)_

_ Experience: Fighters- no further information_

_ Aim: Kill Alex? Capture? (Evasive manoeuvres required)_

_ Names: N/A_

_ Employer: Information irrelevant for time being_

_ Fight or flight?_

Alex body tensed.

"Alex? You thirsty?"

The words jarred Alex when he needed to focus, and he turned ready to snap at them to leave him alone when his eyes landed on the full bottle of water he was offered.

Something sparked inside his eyes.

"Yes, thank you," reaching out, he took the water bottle and then before anyone could react; swiftly stood up, took aim and fired.

Alex watched coolly, K-Unit staring as the bottle whined sharply through the air and struck his target in pinpoint accuracy on the side of his head. The strength of the throw and speed coupled with the wait of the bottle knocked the man out cold; his 'wife' turning round with a speed that did not befit that of an elderly lady.

People in the park froze.

Then activity suddenly erupted; yells and points and scrabbling through bags for mobile phones.

Ignoring all of this, Alex moved swiftly forward, eyes cold and intent on ridding the last threat when a hand clamped roughly down onto his shoulder, the grip painfully tight.

"What was _that?" _Snake's voice was beyond furious- it was _blazing._

Alex tried to shrug the arm off. There wasn't enough-

**_DANGER!_**

****Instinct overran thought.

Twisting, mind blanking momentarily, using the full force of his body, he wrenched himself to the side, gripping Snake's wrists to force him down.

"What are you-" Eagle yelled and then whipped around as a bullet slammed into the tree trunk where Alex and Snake had been stood not so long ago.

They stared as the trunk exploded into chips of bark and wood splinters.

Rolling, spitting out grass, he uttered a curse.

The 'old' woman had hold of the cane.

And it was a gun.

* * *

"You thirsty?" Eagle asked, trying to break Alex out of whatever trance he'd been in.

The teen turned harshly, and Eagle thought he saw a sort of panicked irritation in the teen's eyes before they had fallen upon the water bottle he offered to him. Eagle stiffened, ready for something, but the teen merely nodded, gave a well-mannered "thank you" and took the water bottles.

And then launched them at an elderly man.

They could only gape as the bottle hit target with deadly accuracy (it hadn't even _wobbled) _and the man toppled soundlessly to the ground- maybe even _killing _him.

Suddenly, the words of the Agents echoed in whispers in his head.

Ashen face, they'd all stood up and Cub- Cub looked so _calm, _about to glide forward when Snake grabbed him before any of the other members of K-Unit could- which was good because Eagle wanted to _shake him _and _yell, _and Wolf wanted to _bellow _and _pin him down like a criminal _and Fox's face was so _frightening _at that moment that none of them wanted to know what he'd do.

"What was _that?" _Snake had bitten out with so much venom in his voice that they three men actually flinched.

Alex looked like he had been about to say something when suddenly his body froze, and in a movement that no one fully caught- threw himself and Snake, a _fully grown man _to the ground.

Eagle had felt his rage burn ferociously. "What are you-" then he had stopped as a _bullet_ slammed into the bark where Alex and Snake had stood only a few moments ago.

Wasting no time, they snapped their heads to where the shot had come from, shocked to see the wife of the recently taken down old man standing snarling at them, aiming a _cane _at them- suddenly not looking so old before.

Eagle's eyes dropped to the old man.

Enemies.

Damn.

And then, all hell broke loose.

"Grab Alex!" Wolf yelled.

They snapped into action.

* * *

"Grab Alex!"

Alex heard the shout too.

And he didn't like it.

Diving out of the way of Snake's grab at his ankles who was still on the floor, Alex ducked under Eagle's lunge and skipped then spun to avoid Fox's rush before breaking into a full blown sprint towards the woman with the weapon- only to be tackled to the ground by Wold.

"Get the civilians to safety!" he roared to his unit- uncomfortably loud in Alex's ear. "And call for back-up!"

Mouth full of grass, Alex struggled and heaved, mind screaming **_danger! Danger! Danger! Vacate the premises! _**so loud and urgently that it was deafening.

He'd missed something!

What was it? What _was it?_

Wolf grunted as a stray elbow slammed him in the stomach.

"Calm down, kid! You're safe!"

_No! _He continued to buck and struggle harder.

The- the couple…the baby…the-

No.

Oh _no._

"We need to run!" he yelled, twisting his face out of the grass and renewing his effort to escape as the voice screeched in his head with increased ferocity and volume.

Unfortunately, Wolf was trained at the SAS and worked for SOD- he had experience at dealing with panicking teenagers. Pressing Alex into the ground harder and frowning at the teens frustrated howl, he growled at him. "Everything's under control!"

"No!" It was clear now. So obvious. How had he _missed _it? "It's a trap!" he yelled, breathing hard. "They're all enemies!"

"What do you-"

"Wolf." Eagle was suddenly stood over them.

Angrily, he looked up. "What do you think you're-"

He stared.

Eagle looked sombrely down at him- a gun pressed to the back of his head.

"What on-" Wolf looked around, eyes wide as he saw Fox and Snake in similar positions, all with guns to their heads and hands up. In growing horror, Wolf looked around the rest of the suddenly silent park to see _all _of the supposed civilians staring coldly at them, guns pointed at Alex and K-Unit.

The woman pressing the gun to Eagle's head shifted the fake baby on her hip to the side and twitched her gun in their direction, the light glinting off of it menacingly; the rest of the 'civilians' steadying their weapons. "Give us Alex Rider."

* * *

**AN- Phew! That was long! Anyway, what I wanted to say was I'm going to give this fic an attachment piece. Guess who it's for? *Looks at you all eagerly* For YOUUU! *Throws a hankie at you* Calm DOWN and LISTEN! This is going to be a collection of moments you'd like to see between the characters- Alex, Jack, Ian or K-Unit. I ****_won't _****be giving away what's going to happen at the end of this fic, but there will be I don't know…ways to tease you (I've got the biscuit and YOU haven't sorta feel) maybe. So, um, if you've got anything you want me to write about like Alex making a cake or something (don't ask. It was an EXAMPLE an EXAMPLE!) then PM me! Or, if you don't have a login (to my wonderful little Guest reviewers (: ) then just tap it in alongside your review! Last thing; please don't ask for Alex celebrating his birthday or Christmas or whatever, cos I'd prefer not to write things like that- sides, they're a little obvious. Anyway, do leave a message, and thank you for reading!**


	6. Chapter 6

**AN- Well. Here you have it. THANK ME! *cough cough* sorry. I've had a **_**really **_**busy past few weeks, so I'm sorry for the fact that it took longer than I ever anticipated to get out.(That, and the fact that I have re-drafted this chapter thousands of times- seriously…OK. Well, maybe like 5 or 6 times). I'm not the type to give you a rubbish chapter (some might disagree) and I refuse to give you anything that would melt your eyes, so….uh HERE YA HAVE IT, LOVES! I'm a little wary of this chapter, but not at the same time…gettit? So, er, you know…just- just tell me what you think, yeah? And I put out my attachment piece! OOHH YEAH! So check it out! Now, onwards and outwards, my fellow soldiers!**

* * *

Most enemies of Alex would say that he _loved _loud noises- particularly loud explosions.

They would be very mistaken.

Contrary to popular (or rather, very _un_popular, as these people _were _trying to kill hundreds of people) belief, Alex _despised _loudness and chaos.

He loved silence.

Because…silence meant _peace._

Peace and tranquillity and calm and love and every- everything he wasn't meant to have.

But he _wanted it._

Oh he _wanted _it.

He didn't _know _these people- but he did know what they wanted.

They wanted him. Alex Rider.

But no one was allowed to _have _him ("_You're mine, Alex, all-") _no one was allowed to have him.

"No."

The statement, for some reason, seemed to shock the gun wielding group. Curiously, Alex gazed at them all, wondering _why _they found it so odd. Did they _really _expect him to lower his head meekly, kick at the ground and mutter _yes, he would go with them?_

The woman who held a gun to the back of Eagle's head narrowed her eyes, trailing the weapon lightly down the base of Eagle's skull. "I don't think you understand, _Alex," _she spat the name out- as if it was disgusting, as if it was horrible tasting, sour and-

_Alex._

Alex's eyes trailed to the sky, thinking.

Alex meant 'saviour of mankind'.

Had his father thought that as he gave him his name? As he looked into his baby eyes, all innocent _("you've never been an innocent, Alex. Never,") _and fresh and so- so full of _("Hope is misleading. It doesn't exist." But he couldn't _help _it! He _wanted _to hope! If- if he didn't hope then what-what would be the point of-of-) _hope. Pure. Had his father smiled at him _(smile at me, please?)_? Had he held his tiny child in two, large and powerful hands, kissed the downy top of his head and said in a deep and so comforting _(daddy. My daddy) _voice: "_Your name will be Alex?"_

Frowning, Alex's eyes followed a stray cloud.

But that didn't sound right.

That didn't sound…_(what is-what is-)_fatherly.

So, no, maybe he would've said something more like- _Hello, Alex Rider- _no, that didn't sound- _Welcome to the world Al- no!- _that wasn't-

A sound of a gunshot tore his wandering mind back to the present.

A sharp flare of pain sent his eyes snapping to his left shoulder.

A red line drew sharply across his flesh, dripping red liquid.

Blood.

And then there was _noise. _Loud, loud noise. Wolf was shouting and Ben was shouting and Snake was yelling and Eagle was _snarling _and the woman was waving her gun threateningly and screaming and there was noisenoisenoise-

And he was _bleeding._

_Bleeding._

Wolf was beyond furious. First, they'd been cornered by thirty-odd gun wielding lunatics, then they'd been threatened to hand over _little Cub _and now this. Alex had very calmly (a little too calm. Like he didn't care, like the thought of all these people surrounding him with guns wasn't frightening in the least) declined them as if they were offering him ice cream. Then the woman with the gun to Eagle's head (how _dare _she!?) had glared at _their _Cub, and began spouting off a long winded and especially violent explanation of just _why _Cub wasn't allowed to say know.

And Cub…Cub just wasn't listening.

Wolf had stared at the side of Cub's head as the teen's brown eyes stared into the distance, eyes absently following a drifting cloud, doing an _extremely _good job at ignoring everything and anything around him.

It wasn't quite…right.

It was…_weird._

The woman finally noticed that Cub wasn't paying the _slightest _bit of attention to her, and she had scowled, lifted her gun, and fired- the bullet screaming past Cub's arm and cutting it- a flesh wound, but a wound all the same.

She had shot at a _kid._

"What do you think you're doing?" he snapped, rearing forward only to have guns rattle up towards him. In frustration, he stopped, growling at the woman with burning eyes and clenching fists.

"He wasn't paying attention," she barked back, pressing the now warm gun back into position in the glaring Eagle's head. "Now come here, boy. We have four civilians that we weren't instructed to bring in alive,"

"Don't listen to her, Alex," Fox called, spitting at the man who smacked a gun into the base of his spine.

"Come _here, _Rider, or we start with this one's legs," her voice was dangerous, gun twitching to gesture to Eagle's knee.

_Civillians. _Wolf frowned. They thought that they were _civilians? _Subtly, he slid his eyes over to Fox who nodded very softly, Snake watching silently from where he stood, hands still up. So, he shifted minutely on the grass. They thought they were dealing with ordinary civilians, did they? Calming his thudding heart and his desire to smile wolfishly, he kept his lips tugged down in a frown of displeasure.

_Perfect._

"What do you want with him?" he shouted, hand sliding to grasp the licensed gun he had securely strapped to his side.

"Enough questions! Boy, here!"

Vaguely humming, Alex slid his finger over the bleeding wound on his arm, wondering why it was so _red. _So…_human. _Like rubies and riches and summer skies and apples. So…_red. _Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Wolf reaching for his gun and blinked. So, they were going to start the action? Fine by him.

Now, he had to make his decisions now.

Blow the cover he didn't know why he had to keep, or help out fight?

Slowly, he slid his eyes over Eagle, Fox and Snake.

He saw the hardened look in their eyes.

Very well. He'd help out in a very…different way.

Sighing, readying himself to do something yet again reckless _("You're going to get yourself killed one day, Alex.") _and dangerous.

Anything for some peace (_impossible) _and quiet _(doesn't exist)._

"You can't hurt them!" he cried out, eyes wide and fingers tugging anxiously at his t-shirt, the tiniest of cotton trembles dusting down his spine. "I'll come, OK?"

Wolf's hand shot out to grab Alex. "It's OK, Alex! Trust us!" very subtly, he tried to get across the message that _everything was under control _but the kid just gazed uncomprehendingly back.

"I'm not going to let you get hurt for me," Cub's voice was soft and…brave. Like he knew what he was doing. Like he was (with a subtleness that Wolf couldn't fully translate) trying to tell _Wolf _something, too in those deep (too deep) eyes of his. "I'll be fine,"

"Clever boy," the woman purred, grey eyes flashing with some fearful emotion. One hand outstretched, she waved her elegant fingers gently. "Come here, child,"

"Don't go, Alex!" Fox ordered, straining away from the enemy who stood behind him.

Alex ignored the cry _("Don't go, Ian! Please don't leave me! I'll be good, I swear! I'll be good!") _and instead walked forward, steadying his breaths to ready himself for what he was about to do, keeping his eyes fixed downwards, ready- ready.

He walked closer, closer until the woman's hand shot out and _("let go! Please let go!") _grabbed hold of his top in a serpentine grip. Now he was closer to her, he could smell her perfume, sweet and smelling of roses and wood. With one hand, she shoved Eagle away whose hand was also very subtly reaching towards the weapon Alex supposed he should pretend he didn't know that they had.

"Don't try anything stupid," her voice was cold _(like ice and snow and wind and that place he _really _didn't want to go back to-really-really didn't want-) _as she kept her hand tight around him, the other hand holding the gun to the side of his head. "Now, we're going to walk away and you're going to stay right here," she snapped to Wolf whose hand was getting _closerclosercloser _to the gun.

It was a reckless plan- not well thought out, chaotic and could-be messy.

But that was how Alex worked out.

She took a step back, dragging him with her, gun still pressed to the side of his head.

He followed.

She took another step back and pulled.

He took another step back, took a deep breath, prepared himself- and pretended to trip.

Of course, if it was a normal trip, she could easily hoist him back up, or the gun could slip and her finger could inadvertently press against the trigger and shoot him in the head. So Alex did not _ordinarily _trip. He made it look as ordinary as possible whilst cleverly twisting his body in a way that would bring the woman holding him down with a certainty, and get the gun to fall out of her hand.

His foot slipped behind her, head pretending to jerk out of the way of the gun as the arm that wasn't held flailed upwards, fingers slipping around her wrist, pulling, and he pushed backwards, leg very purposefully tangling up with hers.

Complicated- but it worked.

Wolf gaped as Alex _tripped _over, bringing the unsuspecting woman down with him, gun somehow ending up out of her grip.

In the miniscule surprise filled pause that followed- Wolf, Fox, Snake and Eagle took full advantage of it- just as they had been trained to do.

All four of them pulled their guns out of their holsters and slammed into action.

Fox whipped out his gun, ducked, spun, and drove a powerful fist into the unwary man behind him, the force knocking him onto his back and winded. As the people reactively turned to see what had happened, Snake lashed out with a too fast uppercut to his captors jaw, rolling away and dragging out his gun, firing without remorse.

Noise exploded into the clearing.

Alex's hand snapped towards the gun on the ground just as the woman's hand reached out for it.

"_Rider,_" she hissed, lashing out with a heeled foot that would've caught Alex full in the chest if he didn't roll out of the way fast enough. Hand shooting out again, Alex lunged for the weapon, hissing as the woman's sharp nails dug into his wrist and pulled, attempting to snap it. Alex followed the pull through and head-butted the woman's forehead as he was dragged forward. It only dazed her though, and soon she had both hands wrapped around his neck, squeezing in a hold that was _too tight, too tight, _eyes wild with rage, as his arms scrabbled for the weapon that was just _too far away._

The sound of gun fire and yelling was hugely loud and driving into Alex's brain. Hands latching onto the woman's he bucked and heaved, eyes snapping desperately from side to side as his mouth tried desperately to try and suck in more _air. _

He needed to- needed to- _breathe!_

For what felt like a second, silence descended over him.

Pure, silence.

Peace.

And suddenly he could breathe again.

Light flooded screaming back into sight, noises rushing hurriedly back to his ears with apologies of having ever left him.

Sucking in a harsh and raspy breath, Alex tried to block out the noises of battle from around him. Chest rising and falling in panicked quickness, he rolled onto his side, hand landing in a puddle which he grimaced and pulled away from.

Odd, he thought as breaths soothed him, air calming his blank brain, he couldn't remember it raining.

His breaths stopped.

He stared.

Since when had rain been red?

Red like rubies, like roses, like strawberries, like-

Eyes dropping to his right hand, Alex gazed in wonder at the way his fingers wrapped around a gun in his hands, the metal warm _("Go and warm up by the fire, Alex,") _and solid in his hands.

How had _that _gotten there?

Dread filled the pit of his stomach and slowly, reluctantly _("Don't make me _go! _Please!") _his eyes moved towards what he hoped against he wouldn't _see. _That it would end up being a dream, a silken, haunted dream built on collapsible pillars of tinfoil and dust and thoughts and-

Oh no.

Oh please _no._

Not _again._

Breaths caught like trapped butterflies in his throat, tangled within a web of panic. _No. Nonononoonno! _This couldn't- what had-

_It wasn't you, _a voice whispered comfortingly back, smoothing down his hair like _(daddy? Ian?) _and murmuring softly into his ears. _It wasn't you, a stray bullet hit her, _he tried to tug away from the voice and its silky smooth hands and heat, shaking his head frenziedly. It _was _him. It _was! _The woman's (recently _alive, _recently breathing and living and thinking and-) lifeless eyes stared out into the sky, forever locked to seeing darkness and shadows. _It wasn't _you, _Alex. OK? Calm down. It wasn't _you.

He paused, breaths returning hesitantly, eyes stopping from their panicked lock on the dead woman. _It wasn't him?_

_No, _the voice reassured him gently, softly, like evanescent falling stars. _It's _never _your fault, Alex. _

_Not his fault._

Two strong arms grabbed him up.

His eyes flashed, hand instinctively curling tighter around the weapon in his fist.

"Cub! We need to get out of here, fast!" Eagle pulled the teen up, yelling over the sound of the fight that was still loud. The authorities would no doubt soon be alerted if this noise went on as it was. "Come on!"

Alex nodded, feigning bewilderment, the gun already out of sight.

Eagle looked OK, Alex realised, eyes scanning the tall man critically as he dragged Alex out of danger _(he was always in danger). _

_A cut on the forehead, minor-inconsequential. Out of bullets, destination: forest- manoeuvrability percentage high, coverage and defence:high. _

Shaking the analysis out of his head, Alex concentrated on keeping up with Eagle's quick ducks and sprints as he pulled the teen towards the forest, yelling over his shoulder to try and keep up. Alex gritted his teeth, he was _trying! _It was just that Eagle's legs were too damn _long!_

They burst through the shelter of trees which muffled the sounds of war with their concerned arms, hugging them and urging them deeper into its safety.

"Where are we going?" Alex asked, trying to urge his voice off of its deadpan tone.

If Eagle noticed the voice, he didn't say anything, diving round a tree and further into the forest. "Safety," was the short reply, his eyes darting all over the place- a trained and dangerous man, Alex remembered, suddenly feeling a little tense. "We've called back-up, they'll be here in a few minutes, but we can't hold off thirty trained men." He pulled Cub down with him, pushing the teen under some shrubs and bushes and placing a rough finger to his own tight mouth.

Alex held his breath as he was manhandled into the roots and _("Ian! I can't _find _you! I've been looking for _so long _and it's dark and I don't- I don't _want _to play hide and seek anymore! Can I go home- _please?" _desperate breaths and small fingers, pulling, tugging, searching but never- never finding- never-) _shrubs and Eagle was so _close! _He could feel his hot breaths, his serious hands and- he was too _close!_

"Stop moving!" Eagle whispered in a voice filled with years of authority.

Alex stopped moving.

"Good,"  
the man loosened his grip on the teen's shoulders. "Now listen. I need you to stay here- OK? Stay still and quiet and don't make a sound until one of us gets back,"

"Where are you going?"

Eagle paused, and then gave a lopsided smile, ruffling Cub's oddly soft hair. "I'm going to help out the others, yeah?"  
_The others? Which others? _Alex kept his face neutral though his eyes scanned Eagle warily.

"So don't _move. _I'll be back soon- OK?"

_("I'll be back soon, Alex." "I'm not going for long." "It'll only be a while!" "They just…went on a trip. They'll be back soon.") _And why did his chest suddenly feel so _tight? _Why were his hands clenching against the ground. "OK," But he didn't _believe _him because _no one _came back. No one _ever _came back. They always said they would, but they never did.

Eagle narrowed his eyes and hesitated, catching _something _shadowy shifting through those _damnably _unreadable eyes of Alex's. "Alright," he said slowly, moving back (blessedly for Alex) and stirring to a crouch. "Remember what I said," he pointed severely at the watching teen. "Keep quiet. Stay where you are,"

Alex almost rolled his eyes, but he caught the look Eagle gave him and so nodded meeklyinstead (the word didn't fit Alex), feet shuffling to push his knees up to his chest.

"Good," and it was good. Alex would be _safe. Safe._

Except that word never quite applied to Alex.

"Hey!"

The shout tore Eagle's attention to the side and his eyes widened as he saw two 'cricket playing civilians' rushing towards him, guns pointed out towards him.

Eagle's eyes snapped to Alex's hiding place.

Two brown eyes peered back through the foliage.

Eagle tore his eyes away and cursed sharply, shaking his useless weapon.

He was out of bullets.

_Protecting Cub came first._

"Damn! I'm out of bullets!"

Alex stared at Eagle, brows furrowed, heart thudding. What was the idiot _doing? _If he said that then-

"Hear that? Easy target!" one of the civilian's shouted- and shot.

Alex jerked back from the loud and offending noise, hands sliding over his ears (_like a child)._

With a calmness that _(not here, not here. If I put my hands over my eyes like this then no one can see me) _a small forgotten side of his wept at, his eyes scanned the surrounding.

Where was Eagle?

The 'civilians' hesitated right where Alex was hiding; their guns cocked suspiciously, eyes sharp and sweeping through the forest.

Alex held his breath as the eyes swept closer, closer, clos-

Alex couldn't help but jump as Eagle suddenly burst out of nowhere and tackled the man to the ground, growling and snarling things as the two battled on the leaf strewn ground, the second man pulling out of the way, his hand raised, holding a walkie-talkie to his mouth and muttering into it- calling for back-up- to tell their pursuers where they were.

Back pressed against the back of the tree, Alex watched breathlessly as they fought and scrambled, sucking in a sharp breath as a nasty punch caught Eagle in the eye- but he wouldn't stop fighting and wrestling for possession over the gun that the 'civilian' held and struggled to use at such close range. Through the melee, Alex's breath caught as Eagle's eye trapped his own, the burning message in there clear.

_Run!_

_("Riders _do not _run away.")_

His fingers twitched- flickering towards the gun that burnt against his side.

His breaths caught.

Eyes flickered to cold.

_Kill him._

His eyes flashed to the two men- one talking- the risk of bringing back up or the risk of having (his comrade? Guardian? Friend?) Eagle killed.

Breathing faltered.

Which one?

_Whichever one you choose._

The safety clicked off of the weapon, frozen eyes watching as the man Eagle fought was slammed into the ground before the man wriggled up and attempted to deliver a kick to Eagle's side that was hastily blocked with one vicious movement of a forearm.

_Breathe steady now. Careful. _

Fixed hands drew the weapon up, breaths as certain as a sea breeze.

_And aim…_

Eagle choked out as the man pushed him down, a forearm tight around Eagle's neck, squeezing tighter and tighter, face twisted in fanatic fervour.

_Fire._

Eagle jerked at the bang, and sucked in a heavy breath as the weight that was once on top of him suddenly toppled off of him. Scrambling to sit up, he clawed at his throat, eyes wide and watering as his lungs greedily gasped for air. His eyes fell upon the howling man who clutched at his arm, blood pumping through his fingers that grabbed at the wound, feet scuffling against the ground in his agony.

Backing away from the man and standing up, he turned quickly to face the next man, only to see hi, already on the ground- very much dead.

Who was-

"MI6 back-up! Get down!"

Eagle quickly raised his hands. "Glen Elmer! I'm one of the S.O.D men!" he barked out as men dressed in combats poured through the clearing, guns pointed threateiningly out.

Eagle let out a breath of relief as the weapons were lowered, and the men spread through the clearing, some snapping into walkie-talkies whilst others knelt around the still wailing man- the dead body momentarily forgotten.

"Soldier," an officious looking man said sharply, striding up towards Eagle and nodding fiercely at him.

Eagle nodded back. "Sir," remembering Cub, he spun round and almost jumped out of his skin when he saw the teen standing coolly behind him.

"Don't _do _that!" Eagle snapped, pulling the kid  
to stand by his side- anxiety making his voice rough. Thank goodness the kid was safe. "And I thought I told you to run!" he reprimanded, his arms folded and jaw tight.

Indifferent eyes peered back up at him. "I didn't hear you say anything," he said, voice as smooth as pine wood and moonrise.

Growling a low warning not to be cheeky, he turned and faced the bear-like soldier who was watching them with something close to fond amusement in his eyes. "I take it this is Alex Rider?" he jerked his chin to the (back straight, eyes constantly moving) teen stood next to Glen.

"Yes, sir," he replied respectfully.

"Hm," he let his eyes drift thoughtfully down Alex's face, fingers drumming into the side of his gun. Eyebrows raising minutely at the guardedness he saw in the teens eyes, he snorted softly. "Loosen up, kid. You're safe,"

Eagle gave Alex a shove as the teen rolled his eyes, the officer's lips quirking into a smile.

Alex turned away from them, ignoring them.

_You're safe._

How utterly ridiculous.

He was _never _safe.

"The rest of the threat has been neutralised, sir,"

Alex barely twitched at the sound of the voice, intent instead at staring at the wounded man lying on the floor surrounded by talking S.O.D men.

Hardly aware that his feet were even moving, he curiously shifted closer, eyes riveted in fascination on the red (jewels and rubies and lollipops- "_I want that one!"- _and balls and kites! The one with the tassels! The great big-)

"What are you doing?"

Blinking, Alex stared back at the soldier who gazed back, brows furrowed and lips turned downwards.

Twisting his face- attempting to mirror the expression, Alex glowered back. "I'm watching," he said slowly, eyes wide and voice wholly patronizing.

The soldiers lip twisted and he shrugged off the hand of his comrade who told him to ignore it. "Listen up, kid. This isn't a game you know. This is-"

"Alex Rider,"

Alex's head snapped to the sound of the voice.

Feverish eyes squinted up at him, the 'civilian' wincing as one of the soldiers put pressure onto his wound- attempting to stem the blood flow. "So," the man's voice was raspy and dry with pain. "You managed to get away again?" he chuckled, and it sounded like parchment leaves crunching underneath heavy feet. The bloodshot eyes trained on Alex's face-a frenzied kind of look in them, as if he was trying to remember every last detail of the teens face.

"Remain quiet," one of the soldiers snapped, but the man ignored him.

"I've been told to give you a message," he coughed once, bringing a hand up to his lips which were curled into a gruesome phantom of a smile.

_**Danger! Danger! Danger!**_

Senses on high alert, Alex straightened up, eyes wide assessing, calculating. What was-?

Leaves rustled, his eyes snapped down to the grinning man on the floor, sharp eyes watching the chapped lips move.

"Tick, tock." He whispered and gave a ragged giggle.

_**DANGER!**_

He hardly thought.

"Run!" Alex yelled, and tore away, hand unconsciously reaching out to grip Eagle's.

"Alex! What are you-!" Eagle shouted as he was pulled away, the soldiers standing up, eyes wide and fixed on something on the man's chest.

Alex didn't reply but moved faster faster faster, tearing through the trees, Eagle now running by his side, still asking questions.

And Alex could _hear it. _The ominous tick-tick-tick of a bomb.

His eyes latched onto a possible escape, fingers clawing into Eagle's arm _(a hindrance! Leave him behind!) _and he pulled.

_**BOOM!**_

* * *

Alex breathed in.

Once.

Twice.

His eyes fluttered open.

He was OK.

Eyes swivelled to land on Eagle who lay beside him, chest rising and falling- alive.

Acrid air stung his eyes, and Alex froze at the sound of angry crackling.

Fire.

He shot up, heart hammering, breaths catching and eyes wide because the flames were all over him all over him and it hurt- it really-

"Cub?"

The breath burst out of Alex's chest as two strong arms wrapped around him and hugged (stranglehold, bearhold, half nelson-) him tight, heavy breaths loud in his ears, wide eyes fixing back to reality.

"You're OK!" Snake pulled away as Fox tore Alex out of his arms and hugged the bewildered (not an expression Snake had yet seen on his face) teen into his own arms.

"We thought you'd been caught up in the explosion," Fox's voice was rough with nerves and tension though the tightness of his hug belied his relief.

Wolf stood to one side, and before his brain caught up with him, he'd tugged Alex away from Fox and was roughly embracing him too, one hand ruffling the kid's now dirty blond hair, jaw tensed with withheld emotion. "It's good to see you, kid," his voice was deep, a (reassuring? It was, wasn't it?) rumble against Alex's skull.

"It's over now, Cub. You're safe,"

And though something inside him sneered at the comment, curling it's lip in derision and turning away, that same small part of him- the one that had urged him shyly to let go- gently nudged at him, and whispered at him.

And tentatively, shyly, Alex's fingers curled around the back of Eagle's shirt, pulling, that small voice begging him to give in to just…be _held._

Like a _child._

"Yeah," he lied.

And he almost believed it.

* * *

"Mr Blunt will see you now,"

K-Unit stood up, not bothering to rub off the dirt from their clothes, still peeved at the fact that getting caught up in _all of that _they still had to go and talk to Alan Blunt, head of MI6.

Grumbling under their breath, they trooped into Blunt's office, Alex following behind them, oddly quiet.

For once, Mr Blunt looked up as they entered into his office, though his eyes seemed to latch onto Alex first.

Raising one finger that seemed to hold all of the danger in the world, Alan Blunt deliberately tilted the appendage towards the teen and raised his twin neat eyebrows pointedly. "I didn't ask to see you," his voice was low.

Alex froze in the doorway, and the woman who had led them to Mr Blunt's office blushed and pressed a manicured hand against her mouth, apologising in mouthy babbles, trying to explain how she hadn't seen him following them (no one ever did).

"Goodbye, Alex," the man said coolly.

And for some reason that Alex could not fully comprehend, he felt like he had been _abandoned. ("Don't leave me, please?")_

The protests that wanted to spill out of his mouth were stopped by the hard and unforgiving face of a closed door.

The woman peeled him away from staring at the shut door _("Don't _leave _me!"), _still chattering fussily on about how he could _sit and help her until his friends came back. _And she was an idiot because he _didn't have friends _and he didn't need them.

But still, he ended up following her.

Oddly lost.

"Quite a mess you were caught up in, wasn't it?" Blunt spoke the rhetorical question in a way that clearly stated it as just that- no need to answer. Bored eyes scanned the four men sat in front of him, Ms Jones' presence not there and duly noticed by the four men. "What did you find out?"

Exchanging glances, Wolf cleared his throat, his men and family and friends settling back into their seats to listen and watch. "We were out on a picnic when suddenly Cub- _Alex," _he reiterated, "suddenly threw a bottle at some old guy." In frustration, he shook his head, wanting to think that fact over but not being able to at the time. Fixing his eyes purposefully somewhere above Blunt's head to keep him grounded on what was happening here and now, he continued. "After that, we were surrounded by armed men and women. After C- Alex went over to them, he tripped, and we managed to successfully use that as a distraction to free ourselves," his voice trailed off, brow furrowing. Cub had _tripped. _His fingers flicked against the armrest to his chair. Something wasn't quite right…

"Continuing?" Blunt probed with a veil of impatience over his flat tone.

Wolf snapped back to attention. "Sorry, sir. " he replied mechanically, eyes falling back to that same spot. "We split up after that- Eagle with Alex headed into the forest, and the rest of us heading west- towards the lake and trees. After that, we fought and hid around the trees until back-up came and got rid of the enemy. Then, whilst we were being briefed, there was an explosion." His jaw tightened, but he carried on. "When it had finished, we ran over to the forest which was by that time alight, and began searching for Eagle and Alex for about fifteen minutes until we found them just outside the forest." He snapped his mouth shut- finished.

Mr Blunt nodded slowly, eyes swivelling onto Eagle; eyebrows raised minimally- a silent gesture to give his tale.

Eagle squirmed to sit up and rub the tiredness from his face, Snake and Fox watching with not-very-well-hidden concern on their faces. Scratching at his chin, Eagle tipped his head thoughtfully to the side. "We got tangled in a fight in the forest, but back-up came and quenched the threat- wounding one ad killing the other-"

"There were no orders to kill the target," Mr Blunt cut in smoothly, eyes hard and burning.

Eagle shifted uncomfortably. "Well, he went down because of a shot to the head, anyway." Shrugging lightly, he carried on. "After that, I was briefed by the officer in charge of the back-up squad when I spotted Alex standing over the wounded man. Words were exchanged, but I didn't hear them. After that, he turned, grabbed my arm and began pulling me away through the forest."  
"And then the bomb went off," Mr Blunt finished, folding his hands on the desk in front of him.

Ruefully, Eagle nodded, remembering the feeling of intense heat on his back before a (smaller than his, but rough when it should be soft and youthful) hand that he knew to be Alex's tugged him down into a ditch.

"Hm, well, I must give my commendation for managing to keep Alex safe from the threat," the 'commendation' sounded disinterested and was said with the air of someone who wanted to get it out of the way. "Did you manage to acquire any further information on the threat?"

"No, sir,"

"Very well." Mr Blunt turned his head to examine his shiny window at the end of his office, his heel clicking purposefully against the side of his chair.

When no other words seemed to be forthcoming, Fox swapped a look with his friends and cautiously placed his fraying question out in the open. "Who were they?"

Two dead eyes swivelled onto him, grey lips tugging to form a shadow of what _could _have been a smile. "All in due time, Agent Daniels. All in due time."

* * *

Alex stared into his cup of not-very-Cola with something that any grandma that happened to be wandering through the MI6 headquarters would coo at as a childishly grumpy expression.

Except Alex was thinking about death and general destruction.

So really, it wasn't a childishly grumpy expression.

Watching the fizzing liquid (slightly warm, now) bubble and chuckle in his glass, Alex looked up, very purposefully placing the glass down on the table next to him. Didn't they _get it _that he didn't like non-branded Cola?

His brows furrowed into a soft frown.

He sounded like a…like a…

Teenager.

"Alex?"

Brown eyes snapped up at the familiar (_cold, shivering. "Don't make me go, don't make me-") _voice, a pastel stirring of _something _rising in his chest. "Ms Jones?" cautiously, he slid off of the sofa, slipping forward towards the beckoning woman with liquid silver steps.

The woman smiled at him, but it was tight and held something to it.

A soft wail of _**danger! **_called in his gut, and his hairs stood on end, moving closer slowly, eyes watching for what his senses were warning him of.

"I need you to follow me, Alex," she said when he reached her, and her eyes looked…nervous.

"What for?" Ms Jones almost winced at the north sea calmness to his voice, her head tipping to glance over her shoulder.

"Please don't ask questions, not here, Alex," her fingers brushed against his arm, and she watched as he rocked away from the touch, eyes wide. "Follow me," without waiting for a reply, she turned and strode down the halls, knowing Alex was slipping like a shadow behind her.

Reaching out, she pushed a door open, flicking on the lights in the old room and gliding towards a draw.

Alex watched from the doorway, half in, half out, body tense and wary as the woman rummaged through the draws, not saying anything.

"Shut that door behind you, would you, Alex?" she called.

"Why?" he asked coolly, fingers twitching towards the weapon concealed in his jeans.

Ms Jones looked up at him, still stooped over the desk, eyes exasperated. "Just shut it. And remove your hand from the weapon in your pocket,"

Lightly scowling, Alex pushed the door shut, his hand dropping away from the weapon.

"Here."

Alex turned as Ms Jones dropped something on the desk.

His eyes widened, breaths hitching.

His uncle's box.

Mrs Jones almost flinched as Alex suddenly appeared in front of her, hands on the box, eyes glaring at her with a frantic look that wailed _mine!_

"Calm down, Alex," she snapped, forcing the box out of his gripping, clawing, desperate hands.

"Give it to me," he demanded.

Mrs Jones blinked.

He sounded…_petulant._

Like a child who had had their toy pulled away from him.

He stood glaring at her, hands outstretched, the slightest of pouts on his face. And he looked…young.

Childish.

Pushing the thoughts away, and the uneasiness that came along with them, she pressed a finger against her lips. "I'm not meant to be giving you these, but-" she stopped as she saw suspicion flashing through Alex's eyes, his arms dropping slowly, defensively.

"Then why are you giving them to me?"

Ms Jones pursed her lips and debated over whether to tell him or not. "They're dangerous. Very dangerous. But," she hesitated, eyes moving around the room as if she expected people to come out of the room and drag her away for treason. Moving closer to Alex, she spoke in a charcoal soft voice. "So many things are going on right now that it's hard to tell lies from the truth." She held up a hand to stop Alex's upcoming scathing comment. "Yes, I know that's the job, but this time things are happening that even _we _don't know,"

For some reason, that sent shivers of fear tumbling down his spine. He'd always thought that they knew _everything (not what happened in America, though. Never what happened in America), _and to hear one of the top-dogs whisper that they didn't know what was going on was…terrifying.

_You worship them._

He jumped at the voice and snarled it away, driving it into a corner and brutally tearing it to shreds.

He _didn't._

"What do you mean?" and his voice was suddenly violin –string fragile in the shadowy room, eyes flickering around him.

"I mean that this isn't safe here. Blunt won't listen. He wanted to have it-" she shook her head, the words drying up resolutely in her mouth. "-Never mind." She pulled the lid open on the box and tugged the papers out, still tied by that old piece of string; pushing them firmly into his hands. "This stays as a secret between us. If Blunt found that I-" again, she swallowed her words and pushed him away. "Read them, hide them- and tell no one that you have them," her eyes bored into Alex's. "If they get into the wrong hands, _anything _could happen. Understand?"

He hugged the papers against him, still confused, not quite understanding and it _scared him _that he couldn't keep up with the events that were happening- it was like _("Don't leave me behind!") _like he was being _left behind. _"Yes,"

She nodded sharply, urging him out of the room. "Hide them," she ordered, watching severely as Alex took off his jacket and slung it over the papers (fingers trembling, she noticed).

"Why are you-"

Her teeth clenched, cutting him off. "I don't know what happened in America, Alex. And unlike Blunt, I don't know if I want to know,"

He looked to the floor, shoulders hunched in a rare display of weakness.

"But the CIA are pestering us over you, Alex, and quite generally, this is a mess that I'm sure you know how to sort out yourself." She didn't quite smile- but it was definitely a close call. "I can't stop Alan from issuing you missions, Alex, but I hope this somewhat makes up for that,"

Did it?

Bruised-acorn eyes peered carefully up at her.

"Yeah, thanks," and maybe, maybe that expression on his face was actually a smile.

Maybe it was.

As he slipped off down the corridor to go and sit back at the chairs he had been left at, he creased his brow into a minimal frown.

Ms Jones hadn't been sucking on a peppermint.

* * *

"You will have time to recuperate at home before I want Alex back at school,"

K-Unit leant forward. "School?" Snake asked, frowning.

Alan Blunt nodded from where he had moved to his window. "School. In three weeks. During that time, I want you and him to…bond," the word sounded eerie in his mouth, hard and metallic. "Become closer and tell me if he tells you anything that you view as dangerous information,"

Wolf scowled to the ground, seeing the movement reciprocated by his team. He didn't like that order. It was as if Blunt wanted them to be weasels. Faux family members who sifted all of Alex's information back to him.

"Understood?" Mr Blunt turned round to face them, gaze stony.

And they didn't have any other choice.

"Understood,"

"Then, that will be all. Alex should be waiting for you in the hall," he turned away from them- a powerful man's dismissal- leaving his back exposed.

Standing up and wincing as their recently acquired wounds moaned, they stalked out of the office.

Mr Blunt turned back from the window after they had left, and sat down at his desk, a pen finding its way into his hand and tapping against the desk. He looked up at the sound of a tap on his door.

"Come in," he called, voice monotonous.

Ms Jones stepped into the office, clicking the door shut behind her.

Mr Blunt's eyes fell back onto the pen in his hands. "Have you done it?" he asked in a flagstone tone.

Ms Jones slid further into the office, placing her laptop on Mr Blunt's desk and nodding. "I gave him the documents,"

"Did he believe you that they were real?"

"Yes. He took them after asking why I did so," she sat down in her soft padded chair, turning the laptop on.

"And you gave him a believable excuse?"

"I told him that there were secrets and lies flying around HQ, and hinted at you wanting the documents gone,"

Mr Blunt tapped the pen against the desk, his eyes following the movement intently. "Good. Things are finally falling into place."

Placing her chin carefully in one palm, Ms Jones looked at her boss with pebble like eyes. "Was it safe to give him the fake documents so soon? I thought that we would've waited a while longer?"

"I dislike being behind," Mr Blunt cut in, straightening up and fixing his subordinate with a firm look. "The threat is pushing forward; and so should we." With the pen, he pushed a paperclip across his ebony desk. "It's time we made our move, or rather," he put the pen down. "We made _Alex_ made his move."

* * *

**AN- Here! Take it! *Runs and ducks, trembling* Wh-what? I _gave _it to you, yeah? You've been pining about it, right? So?! Do you like it? Do you? And- Bwahahaha! Which one did Alex shoot? Will it ever come out into the story? But more importantly…DID YOU LIKE IT?**


	7. Chapter 7

**AN- Does anyone actually read this?**

… **To those who do, this is chapter 7! Yaaayyy! It's almost one, and I'm uh, pretty energised as I usually am at night, so, you know. Here it is! A little shout out to Aardwolf who pointed out something I forgot to mention in the last chapter…I fixed it! So, here ya have it, luvs! Do enjoy!**

**Disclaimer- …I refuse to talk to idiots. Work it out.**

* * *

Tom always made a habit of passing his old (or was it still? He hadn't heard from him in so long, though…) best-friend's house. Even now as he walked, hefting his bag further up his shoulders, he still didn't quite know why he did it. Eyes roving absently to the blue cloud strewn sky, he mused a little bitterly over why he made himself do it. Was it in the hopes that one day he'd see Alex coming out of the front door? That he'd knock and his cool eyed friend would pull the door open and agree to play footie with him? Or was it some form of renewing his faith that Alex _was _actually out there. That he hadn't been sucked into another elaborate scheme of which he (Alex had given him an envious look when he had told his blond friend that he didn't understand what Alex was trying to describe. It had only been quick- a flash of jealousy, and then it was gone. But Tom could always remember) never could understand. That Alex was still _there._

Whatever the reason, he thought as he passed the house, peering at the well sized building and tidy garden, the curtains closed still, he wished that Alex would come and pull that door open one day. Pull it open, step into the sunshine and be…_Alex. _His friend.

Swallowing melancholy thoughts and forcing his feet to move from where he'd drifted to a distant eyed stop, he pushed a painful laugh, swinging his arms to clasp the back of his head as he walked to meet his friends for a game of football to practise for their next match.

Staying stuck in the folds and twists of time never did anyone any good.

"Hey, guys!" he yelled as he reached the football pitch, stirring his limbs into a jog, face cracking on a grin.

The huddle of teens waved back, but were swapping glances- Tom noticed that Dylan's face looked a little odd, and Elliot kept glaring at Ryan.

Grin wilting slightly, he slowed his jog as he approached them, glancing round at his friends with wary curiosity. "What's going on?" he asked as he stopped in amongst them, moving his eyes over them all- not all would meet his gaze. Frowning, a feeling of foreboding settled in his stomach as he folded his arms, still watching them for any clue of what was going on.

After Alex had left, he'd been accepted into a group of friends. Tom had never been a loner like Alex (Tom winced at the term, but knew that Alex viewed himself as such although it annoyed Tom when people would call him it) but had always had a steady stream of friends after the bullies that Alex took out got off of his back. But…the thought of just _leaving _Alex and joining up with another group of friends was _unthinkable. _Tom just knew that the friends he'd joined up with would not accept Alex as one of them- and though Tom at times _wanted _to, he knew he couldn't blame them for thinking like that.

Alex was nothing like them.

Alex was _strange._

_No, _Tom thought sternly, _Alex is different. And sadly, different is 'strange' and 'dangerous'._

But Alex always came to school looking more and more run down, more and more lost. At times, Tom thought he had caught Alex just staring dazedly at the other school children, amusement shining blue in his brown eyes- as if he was just _watching _but wasn't actually part of it.

"It's just Ryan," the voice jerked Tom out of his thoughts and he frowned at the slightly scowling, more nervous looking boy.

"Why, what's he said?" Narrowing his eyes, Tom let his football drop to the ground, restraining a soft sigh. It didn't look like they were going to be playing anytime soon.

"He said-"

"I'm not lying, Elliot!" Ryan finally blurted out, eyebrows lowered in what looked to Tom like frustrated rage.

Elliot pulled a face and made to continue when Dylan placed a hand on the teen's shoulder and tugged him back. Dylan's expression was difficult to pry apart _(Alex would've been able to do it) _and Tom squinted at him, face suspicious.

Dylan raised his hands. "It's nothing, Tom. We don't know yet. It's just Ryan's been telling us-"

"Alex is back!" Ryan snapped out.

What?

Scowling, hissing, the group of teens shoved at Ryan who glared back at them unrepentantly. "You weren't meant to tell him so soon, you idiot!"

Tom stared at the grass.

Alex was _back._

Alex was _back._

And he waited.

Waited for the excitement to stir inside him.

Waited for the grin to stretch across his face; to whoop and parade around the place, sprint straight back to Alex's (so empty, so lonely and cold) house and bang the door down, yelling for-

Why wasn't he feeling anything?

Dylan approached his unmoving friend slowly, his eyes careful. He knew that he and Alex had always had a deep friendship- one that was complicated to look at- it looked like both were propping the other one up- desperate not to let go lest they both fell into the hounds that snapped at their feet. "Hey, listen, mate. Ryan might be wrong, you know," he shrugged. "I didn't see him,"

Tom flinched.

And was that…hope stirring in his gut?

Hope that Alex was still in America?

Suddenly, guilt savaged him.

"It's not that!" he found himself snapping, rearing away from their misunderstood sympathies. He looked up, eyes wide and fingers digging into his palms just wishing that they could just _go back to playing football. _"I- I _do want _him to be here, it's just that it's so unexpected!" his vice was loud, loud to drown out the hisses of _liar _that huddled in his ears.

Shaking his head, seeing the sceptical expressions of his friends(did Alex still fit into that category?), he took another step backwards, eyes falling down to the football that sat obediently at his feet. "What did he say to you, Ryan?"

Ryan opened his mouth to answer the softly spoken question, glaring at those of his friends who still stubbornly refused to believe him until they had hard evidence up in front of them. "We just talked about stuff, you know. Nothing really pointed. He asked after you," here, Tom's heart jumped with something akin to glee and apprehension. "And he mentioned something his guardian,"

"His guardian?" Dylan frowned. "What happened to that lady- what was her name again?"

"Jack," Tom murmured, confusion keeping his voice soft.

"Yeah, that's-"

"Sorry I'm late, guys!"

The yell of Ewan as he ran over interrupted Ian's flow of conversation, and the teens turned to glare exasperatedly at the latecomer who slowed when he reached them, grin dropping slightly- an unconscious mimicry of what Tom had done earlier before.

"Guys?" Ewan called lamely stopping by them and glancing at them nervously, rubbing at his arms self-consciously.

"You're always late, Ewan!" Ian punched his friend good naturedly in the side, who mock winced and pulled back.

"Yeah, yeah- but guys!" he threw up his arms excitedly, eyes shining behind his glasses. "Guess what?" grinning, he leant forward conspiringly, though his voice was hoarse, straining on a thrilled shout. "St Donald's parks woods were set on fire- they're saying it was a terrorist bombing gone wrong!"

The boys immediately burst into speculative comments, loud and giddy at the sound of new news.

Tom felt sick as he pulled away, eyes dropping to his forgotten football on the ground.

All the doubt he'd had over Ryan's comment vanished.

Alex Rider was back for sure.

* * *

Alex's heart was thumping as he handled the box, the _thump thump thump _of his heartloud and erratic in his ears.

Glancing once again up to the closed door of his room, he deemed it safe to open _(my uncles. Ian's) _box.

With trembling fingers and tight breaths, he pulled the lid carefully off of the box _(don't break it…carefully…slowly) _and placed it gently onto his bed, hands reaching in to pull out the papers inside, bound together by that old piece of string.

And- oh.

They _smelt _like him.

Somehow, Alex found himself with the papers pressed against his nose, eyes shut, breathing in the smell of _Ian._

And Alex couldn't tell whether he missed _him_ or just missed _having him._

It was hard to tell nowadays.

The papers tickled his face, and slowly, breathing in softly, he pulled the papers away from his face and unwound the rough string off of them, eyes bright and wholly intense on the papers as he peeled the first one off.

Heart thumping erratically in his chest, he traced the figures and words on the page.

Frowning, he lifted up the page and placed it on the bed, looking at the one underneath.

And the one underneath that one.

And underneath that.

And underneath that.

Frustrated, he slammed the papers on his bed, pushing a hand through his hair.

He didn't _understand!_

What did it mean? Growling softly under his breath, he screwed his eyes shut, leaning back onto his bed, breaths sharp because he _couldn't understand _and, oh _Ian, _he couldn't under-_(Snapping voices, tugging. "It's not difficult, Alex! You just need to listen!" but he _was _listening and nhe tried to _tell _him that but he was just "Don't make excuses. Sit there and don't mve until you get it," but he was tired and lonely and he just-) _he couldn't under- and what- what was he going to _do _if he couldn't-

_Take a deep breath and look at them again. Don't waste time._

Slowly, he removed his hands from gripping at his hair, letting them slide down to his lao, breathe in pendulum steady. That was right. Look at them again.

Almost robotically, Alex lifted up the pages again and was about to flick through them when something fell out and landed onto his lap.

For a moment, Alex only stared at the sheet of brown paper sat butterfly patient in his lap. Then, hesitantly, he reached out and picked it up, gently, as if it would burst into dust at a brush of his finger tips.

Placing the wad of papers down onto his bed and picking up his new puzzle, Alex flipped it round, a waxen frown smoothed in between his brows. Carefully, he peeled the folded piece of paper over, and read carefully what was written on it in spidery black- now blueing due to age- font and read it in his head.

_Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water  
Jack fell down and broke his crown  
And Jill came tumbling after.  
Up got Jack, and home did trot  
As fast as he could caper  
He went to bed and bound his head  
With vinegar and brown paper._

Leaning back, frown still in place, Alex contemplated over the sudden turn in events.

_Well, that's typical, isn't it? _Suspicion hissed, scowling and narrowing it's eyes at the paper. _So typically movie –style. You just _happen _to be rooting round a bunch of papers and then- oops!- out pops the sudden piece of paper that could just be the answer to everything you've ever needed. Yeah right._

_It could be vital evidence! _Luck spoke up defensively.

_Or it could be a trap, _Paranoia whispered lowly, eyes darting around as she huddled closer to Alex's ear. _A trap. You know they all want you. You know they could-_

_Or it _could _be Ian. You _know _what Ian was like. _Reason interrupted loudly.

_No one knew what Ian was like, _Doubt retorted.

_We need to decipher it. _Reason kept going. _It could give us some knowledge that we'd never know if we didn't read it!_

_Maybe it's safer to not know…_Doubt whispered softly.

_I think you should destroy it. _Suspicion shrugged. _Just saying._

_They all want you, you know that, Alex. They want to hurt you. Get rid of it and run. You don't know what-_

_Keep it._

_Destroy it._

_Decipher it._

Alex snapped back from his thoughts.

Blinking up the ceiling, he steadied his breathing, eyes flickering back to the paper clenched in his hand. Loosening his vice-like grip, he shifted.

_Decipher it._

He read the first line aloud (his mouth _didn't _struggle over the word 'Jack'. I _didn't) _and soft- like smoke.

_Jack._

That had significance.

That had _vital _significance, didn't it? But why would Ian write about (red hair, fun and bubbles and those scrambled eggs that just made up everything she was. Silly and small and so-so-)Jack? Why would he-

_Why are you just assuming that this 'Jack' is _that _Jack? It could be a code for something else, you know._

That was right.

The voice was right.

He needed to look beyond the obvious- look beyond that little childlike entity that huddled in the far corner of his mind, the one covered in cobwebs and long a go deserted hopes of crumbling sandstone. He needed to look beyond its crying voice, the voice that called out in china cracked and willowy sobs of _Jack, Jack, why did you leave me? Why did you- _he needed to look ahead. Past that. Forward.

Alex dropped his eyes, briefly closing them.

But the future was so _scary._

Mentally shaking those thoughts off, Alex determinedly looked back down at the sheet of paper in his hands, re-reading the poem.

If he was to- if he was to just _assume ("Assumptions are dangerous, Alex. Never believe you know what needs to be known. Keep an open eye, wary, careful and steady,") _for a few moments that perhaps, perhaps this 'Jack' (the fool. Falling down a hill) was _his (never yours, Alex. Never yours) _Jack…that maybe, just maybe-

_("Stop faltering." He snapped. "Quench your emotions and focus on the task at hand. They're a distraction, Alex. How many times have I told you to stop holding onto pointless-"0_

Ok, _OK! _He _got it! _He'd just- he'd lock it away. He would. He _needed _to.

_Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water  
Jack fell down and broke his crown  
And Jill came tumbling after._

What did it mean? If this Jack was _(oh, Jack, why did you have to go? Why did you leave me?) his _Jack, then who was the Jill?

He didn't know a Jill- did he? For a moment he went through his memories before gratefully tugging away from the graveyard place and shaking his head softly. No, he didn't know a Jill. Then who would Jill be?

_Forget on the significance of the rhyme. Like this part 'went up the hill to fetch a pail of water'. Is the 'pail of water' significant of anything?_

Water.

It was everywhere.

Up his nose, in his eyes and- _no, please no- _it was in his _lungs _and he couldn't breathe! Couldn't breathe because it was absolutely _everywhere _and he couldn't-

_Next line._

"'Jack fell down and broke his crown,'" Alex traced the words with a shy finger, imagining Ian's wrist moving up and down to write on the paper. Fixing his mind back to the matter in front of him, he mulled over the words. When nothing came, he tried another line, and then another.

_Perhaps the significance lies not in the names, but in the words._

The voice was not hopeful _(never hopeful. Hope's too dangerous. Too tangling and sharp) _but held a careful amount of certainty, so Alex listened to it, leaning further over the paper to try and work out _just why _he felt it was so important.

* * *

"Is Cub still in his room?" Wolf asked as Eagle stepped softly down the stairs.

The lanky man nodded, sliding onto the vacant seat in the living room and accepting the biscuit Fox offered him. "Yeah, quiet as a mouse,"

"That's Cub," Snake replied softly.

Murmuring vague agreement, K-Unit stared off into space, lost as usual with thoughts of their odd charge.

When they had got in, Cub seemed in an odd rush to run straight up to his room, and Snake had to physically hold him back to treat the bullet graze on his forearm which had gone forgotten through all the excitement that had been going on.

Nearly being blown up tended to have that effect on people.

Even then, the kid had refused to let go of the box he suddenly had in his possession, a sort of fanatic light in them that almost growled at them whenever they got too close to it.

As soon as Snake had finished and given the all clear, Cub had turned and sprinted up to his room.

"Who of you believe that Alex really tripped up with that lady?" the demand was sudden and unexpected- but not a question that any of them hadn't asked before. Nervously scanning his teammate's faces, Snake folded his arms close to his chest and tapped his foot on the carpeted floor- an agitated tic that he'd always had.

"What are you trying to say?" Wolf said sharply, tensing his jaw and sitting up straighter.

Snake turned his eyes onto his leader. "What I meant." he clarified a little cryptically. Sighing at Wolf's upgraded glare, he rephrased himself. "Do you _really _believe that Cub, quiet, mysterious, careful Cub would _just so happen _to trip up a lady with a gun to his head and not get shot?" his lilac eyes retained their cutting edge to them again. "Well, do you?"

Wolf stared down into his glass of Ribena (no point hiding it now, was there?). Truth be told, he'd been rolling the same struggling query about his head too but he didn't want to say it. Saying it shone light on it. And sometimes, sometimes he thought Cub looked better in the shadows where the darkness masked his features.

"I don't know," Eagle began cautiously, fingers rubbing crumbs from his trousers. "It's…hard to tell with Cub," he thought back to when they were in the forest running from their pursuers. Cub hadn't seemed…bothered. If you weren't there, and only looked at his face, you'd think the kid was only grudgingly playing a game of hide-and-seek. "I don't- I can't quite…" screwing up his face, he tore the words out. "I don't understand him. He doesn't seem to make much sense,"

"So you think he didn't trip," Snake prompted with crayon violet impatience colouring his words.

"I didn't say that," Eagle said defensively, pressing his back into the couch and holding up his hands. "All I'm saying is that I don't think we should cancel out any options before we get to know him,"

"_If _we get to know him," Snake muttered darkly.

"Of course we'll get to know him," Wolf snapped, raking his dark grey eyes across them all. "But we're _not _going to get to know him better by sitting here and throwing thought against a brick wall. We need to _do _something," Wolf had always been a man of action. If there was a problem; he'd get up and solve it. He wasn't the sort to simper and throw candyfloss suggestions gently around the place- and he knew his men were the same as him too. Cub had just driven them into a momentary rut; his own mystery was driving _his loyal men _to tiptoe about the place like _nursery maids. _

"Do what?" Fox asked- of whom had been (yet again) strangely quiet ever since they'd gotten back from the Royal & General.

Wolf fixed him with a sharp stare to which he was pleased to see made the man fidget. "We ask," he held up a hand to silence their loud complaints. "No," he snapped. "We give him an opportunity. We'll ask him if we have something we want to know. If that doesn't work, then we start trying to piece together the things he or any other people let drop."

"How are we going to do that?" Eagle asked, his voice tinged with grudging enthusiasm, Snake also watching with something very close to satisfaction and Fox…Fox's expression was harder to unravel. But Wolf had trained with him for a long time, so he could see the tension in his face along with the curiosity.

Wolf smiled and held up a dramatic finger. "We listen,"

Eagle, Snake and Fox waited for more.

Wolf's finger drooped slightly and he pulled back into his chair. "What?"

"What more do we have to- wait- was that _it?" _Snake crumpled his brow at him.

Wolf gritted his teeth. "What more do you want? Me to get up on the table and start waving a banner with Cub's _face _on it? Huh?"

The burst of laughter that flooded from each of their mouths lessened the heavy atmosphere, and for a while at least, helped to make their thoughts and concerns over Cub seem a little less daunting then they were before.

* * *

"Where are you going?"

Tom turned to face Ewan, the speaker and shrugged slightly, standing up from where he'd sat on the damp grass, tugging listlessly at the green blades as the rest of his friends chattered about the Fire Conspiracy as they had now dubbed it.

"About, you know. I need to get back and do Mr Linfords homework," he muttered more to the ground than to Ewan.

Ewan squinted up at him, holding a hand to his forehead to shade his eyes from the sun. "Really?" he sounded doubtful.

Tom hid a wince. He didn't blame him. The mere thought of him, _Tom, _doing his homework 3 weeks before the actual deadline was laughable.

Luckily, Ewan seemed as if he was itching to get back to the conversation that had now turned into a heated debate over whether or not aliens were involved in the bombings (courtesy of Gerald Miller- alien and supernatural happenings extraordinaire) and so nodded quickly, smiled once, and then turned back to yell his own side to the conversation.

Waving with false heart to the friends that weren't so absorbed as to not see him leaving, Tom walked away; quickening his pace as he got past the tree line that would hide him from their view.

_What are you _doing? Some voice yelled at him- his own, he knew.

Snapping at the accusing voice to shut up, he looked both ways before jogging across the road that led to his destination.

_I have to do this! It's important! _After that, he ignored the voice, leaving it to fume inside his head.

Finally, he reached his destination.

Alex's house stood imperiously in front of him, glassy eyes gazing down at the small insect beneath it with a perilous gaze.

Swallowing, steadying his galloping heartbeat, he swung the (it still creaked) gate open and stepped up the path and up the (still layered in thin moss) stairs. Licking his dry lips, wincing as they stung angrily at him, he slowly reached out a fist, scrunched up his courage- and knocked on the door.

And waited.

And waited.

Tom _did not _breathe a sigh of relief when no one came to the door.

He didn't know what was _wrong _with him today. Shaking his head and taking a step back to peer up into those furious eyes of the house; Tom scratched the back of his head, doing his best to ignore the phantom ache in his arm as he did.

If Alex was back, then where was he?

_He's probably just gone out. Alex is like that- can't sit still for ten seconds, _Tom tried to muster some amount of warmth to the thought, but felt nothing but a slight numbness. Hesitating by the door, he frowned at it, wondering just _where _his friend was. And why he hadn't called him.

_Called him._

Tom's eyes widened. That was it!

Dropping his bag on the floor, he leant over it, muttering under his breath as he dug through it to try and get to his- there!

Like an Olympian, he held up his phone triumphantly before dropping to sit on Alex's front porch steps, his fingers scrolling through the menu and into contacts until he hit that one name- the first on his list.

Alex Rider.

His fingers twitched towards the ring button before he hesitated, doubt shading his eyes.

Would Alex still have his phone?

Tom's fingers jerked impatiently towards the ring button but he held off a little longer. Alex was, after all, a genius for losing things. He was also the most paranoid person that Tom had ever met. Perhaps he'd lost his phone or gotten rid of it to avoid being tracked.

Or to avoid speaking to him.

_He never even said goodbye, _something (his voice) whispered bitterly.

And suddenly, Tom knew just why he was so reluctant to see Alex.

Alex had just _left. _Just left him- Tom, his best friend- just _left _him. No words. No call. Nothing. And it _hurt. _They were meant to be friends. Sure, he _knew _that some things in Alex's life were insurmountable even to him, but the fact that Alex had just (abandoned) left him _hurt. _It really _hurt._

So maybe he was justified in not calling him. Tom lowered his phone, eyes glaring at his knees. Maybe it served Alex right if he came back from America and Tom didn't go and talk to _him. _See how much _he _liked being ignored. Maybe he deserved it.

But Tom wasn't like that.

He lifted the phone up again, a sigh escaping from his lips, eye still doubtful but heart determined. He'd been hurt plenty of times. Friends who lied about being friends, bullies, parents who just wouldn't give him the time of day- and now Alex, his best friend supposedly _abandoning _him (man, he sounded like a dog from a Dogs Trust advert)- but he got up because that was _who he was. _Loyal to the bone, just like a bouncy ball. _Throw me down and watch me bounce up higher than before._

Even if Alex acted like an idiot to him, they were still _friends. _

No matter what.

He pressed ring.

* * *

_He went to bed and bound his-_

_Rring! Rring! Rring! Rring!_

Alex's head shot up, on high alert.

What was that-?

_Rring! Rring!_

His…phone.

Alex physically shrank back from the noise, eyes wide as he pressed himself away from the sound, eyes swinging wildly round the room. He needed to turn it off! Make it _stop!_

"_This phone looks pretty good, Al,"_

_Alex looked up and almost choked on his milkshake. "That's not a phone!" he spluttered, backing away from the…thing held loosely in between Jack's slender fingers. "That's a…monster!"_

_Jack pursed her lips at him, though he saw fun dancing in her eyes like twin fireflies. "This is a state-of-the-ark phone! Many people have sold their souls to the devil to attain it!" she said melodramatically, gesturing at it with wild waves of her arms._

"_Jack," Alex kept his voice patient. "If you get me that phone, I'll throw it down the stairs and put the pieces in your scrambled eggs,"_

"_It's only £30," she wheedled, choosing to ignore Alex's joking threat._

_Alex took a step forward, ever curious. He laughed._

_Thumping him in the arm, she glared at him. "What?"_

"_That's monthly, Jack. It's a contract phone," he said, grinning and ducking from her swinging fist._

_Jack gaped at the thing in her hands, shoving it back from where she got it from as if it was on fire. "For _that _hideous thing?" she near shrieked. "What's the world coming to?"_

_Alex spluttered in laughter as Jack became wound up in one of her infamous rants, and tried to stifle them as a disgruntled store assistant told them to either stop making so much noise or leave._

_Nose in the air, Jack had firmly grabbed up Alex's arm and dragged him out of the shop, muttering about uppity store assistants and monstrously overpriced phones._

_The next day, Alex had found the monster wrapped up in gold wrapping paper under his bed._

"_I got it from Ebay," Jack grinned when he asked. She held up a hand £15.67! Not bad, huh?"_

_Alex never did get round to throwing it down the stairs._

And now he wished he had thrown it down the stairs.

Because- oh _help him- _he didn't want to remember!

Where had he put it?

Head swimming with barely restrained memories, he pushed under his bed, barely away of his gasping breaths as his hand swiped for his bag and yanked it out.

"Stop it, stop it," he whispered feverishly as he dug through the contents of the black bag, hand finally closing around the heavy mechanism. Pulling it out viciously, he made a move to throw it against the wall (he should've gotten rid of it. Should've let go of it. Too many memories. A dangerous link to his past. He should've-) when his eyes caught the name of who was ringing him.

Tom.

His _friend _Tom.

His _friend._

And somehow, he found the phone pressed against his ear and his voice coming out softly.

"Hello?"

* * *

"Hello?"

To be extremely honest (which Tom was to an almost painful degree) Tom hadn't expected Alex to pick up. So when that soft (Alex), detached (Alex) and undoubtedly curious (oh Alex) bled through the phone and into his ear- he- for once in his life- lost all idea of what to say- mind going completely blank.

For a moment, he didn't know how long, he sat there just staring ahead of him, still sat on the stairs to Alex's old house.

"Hello?" the voice (_Alex_) tried again.

Snapping out of his daze, he sat up straighter and cleared his throat, and clutching the phone with an almost scared intensity to his ear. "Hey, Alex," his voice cracked and he hurriedly attempted to clear it.

There was a pause at the other end of the line before Alex's voice (so _quiet._So _calm. _Didn't he feel _anything _that he'd just _left him again?_) came through again. "Hey, Tom." Another pause. "Are you…OK?"

"Am I OK?" Tom felt the words burst out before he could stop them. "What about _you? _There was an explosion yesterday, was it you?"

Another uncertain pause. "I'm still talking to you, right?"

And he still had that sense of humour. Except it was slower than before; a little more hesitant. "Don't be stupid- you know what I mean," but that didn't _matter. _And he didn't understand just _why _he was talking to Alex like he'd never gone. Talking to him like his _best friend _hadn't just abandoned him. But he couldn't seem to get the words out to express what he felt. Not here. Not over the phone. "Where are you?" he demanded.

"I'm…somewhere else. You'd better move from the steps of my house, Tom. The neighbours already think I'm pretty weird,"

Tom tried to quench his thudding heartbeat. It wasn't normal how Alex could do that- just know where he was. "Nah," he forced his voice to come out lightly, carelessly. "They like me, I helped mow their lawns last summer,"

"Hm. So did I," and the voice of his friend seemed a little warmer than when he'd first called him.

"Yeah, but I've just got a personality that people like- friendly, you know." And even though he wanted to scowl, to shout at his friend, he found himself smiling. Alex just had that effect on people.

"If you say so," the voice mused (not quite Alex, something else. A little more…).

"So? Where are you then?" Tom reverted back on track, voice harsh. It was tricky getting an answer out of Alex. He could avoid giving answers like nobody's business, and had the amazing propensity to change topics without you even realising he had.

"I'm just…listen, this isn't-"

"I'm coming over. Give me your address," his fingers absently chased an insect away from the wall it was trying to climb up.

"Tom, I can't-"

"Come help with dinner Cu- whoa! Who're you talking to? And what're all those papers?"

Tom frowned at the unfamiliar voice.

Who was that?

* * *

Alex smiled gently as Tom spoke, still as rowdy and loud as ever.

The smile slipped as he asked to come over just when he thought he'd averted that line of topic. Eyes dropping to the papers on his bed, he tried to dissuade his friend _(you sure about that, Alex? Do you _really _want a friend? After all, you're not the best friend someone could have, now, are you?) _from that line. But Tom was stubborn (he _knew _that. Had he really forgotten?) and wouldn't give up.

"Tom," he tried again. "I can't-"

His head snapped round as the door to his room swung inwards and Fox strode in with a cracker in his mouth. "Come help with dinner, Cu-whoa!" the man did a double take when he saw Alex with a phone pressed to his ear. Gesturing wildly at the device and scattering crumbs everywhere, he pointed. "Who're you talking to?" his eyes caught sight of the papers scattered about Alex's bed. "And what're all those papers?"

"Nothing," he found himself snapping- way out of his comfort zone. Surreptitiously, he shifted his hand to try and grab up the papers, but Fox wasn't having any of it.

Striding forward, he bent down to lift one up.

"They're mine!" Alex said sharply (his voice did not go higher at the end. His words did not tremble) as Fox's fingers brushed against the paper. "_Mine!"_

Fox stared at the teen, eyebrows furrowed, fingers tickling the paper. "Who are you talking to?"

"Tom," was the short and brusque reply, Alex's eyes fixed on the hand that was _so close _to Ian's papers.

"Who's Tom?" Snake and Eagle popped their heads round the corner and then stared at Alex who was on the phone.

Alex clenched his teeth. He was on the _phone. _They were gaping at him as if he'd grown some sort of fungal growth on his ear that was now asking them whether the moon was made out of cheese.

"Your room's a tip, Cub!" and great. Now _Wolf _was here too. The whole crew. "If we were back at the barracks, Serg would have your guts for breakfast!"

"So, who're you talking to?" Eagle urged again, eager to hear. "A girl?"

"Said her name's Tom,"

"That probably _means, Fox, _that it's a boy," Snake said slowly.

"No, I'm pretty sure you can get girls called Tom,"

"Where on earth did you-"

"Tidy up your room, Cub!"

"What _are _these papers?"

And Alex could hardly think because they were all _talking _and it was _noisy _and he couldn't _think _and now _Tom _was asking him who they were and they were trying to look at his papers and his room _was _tidy _("Come on, Al! Just, you know, let go a bit! Relax. Mess your room up a _little. _Please? Like a normal teenager?") _it was _never _messy and he just-

"Stop it!"

K-Unit turned to Alex who sat on the floor, eyes oddly glazed.

"Just, _please, _I'm on the _phone," _the look was gone, replaced by irritation.

K-Unit stifled a grin.

That was the most teenager-ish thing they'd ever heard Cub say.

"Who _are _you talking to, though?" Eagle just wouldn't let it go.

"I've told you. His name's Tom. Tom Harris," the reply was cold.

Eagle raised an eyebrow. "That doesn't mean much to me,"

Alex frowned at him. What more did he want? A description?

"Is he a family member, friend…?" Snake prompted slowly, much like a shepherd would urge a sheep with a stick.

Was he a…

_Friend._

"Yeah," he muttered, ignoring Tom on the other end of the phone.

"Yeah to what?" Wolf asked impatiently.

_Does it matter? _"Friend," he said quickly, rushing the word so he didn't have to taste it. "And no, Tom," he turned away from the watching K-Unit, desperately trying to swallow the fear that wriggled in him from saying that one word. "You can't come round,"

"Sure he can," Wolf spoke up quickly. Way too quickly.

Alex's eyes moved on to him. "Why?"

"Because he's your friend," Fox tried to explain gently, patiently.

"You don't know that!" he snapped.

K-Unit frowned at the kid, confused by Cub's seeming desperation to not have this "Tom" person round. "You just told us that he was," Eagle tried to figure it out, talking slowly.

"Give him the address. And tell him to keep it to himself. In fact, where is he? It'd be safer if we went to go and pick him up," Wolf wasn't giving in. If they had this "Tom" round, then who _knew _what they could find out from him?

"No," Cub reared back from them, something glassy flitting through the depths of his eyes. "I don't want you to-" he flinched away from the phone as Tom yelled into it.

"I'M OUTSIDE ALEX'S OLD HOUSE!"

K-Unit winced.

Tom definitely had a mouth on him.

"Good, then we'll go and pick him up," Wolf turned and pointed to Snake. "You, with me,"

Alex sat up, eyes wide. "You _can't _go!"

But Wolf wasn't listening, and Snake only shot him a puzzled look before following after Wolf's retreating back.

Alex scrambled up, desperation fuelling his movements. And he didn't _care _if he looked desperate. He didn't _care _if he looked weak. Tom _couldn't _come here! Tom _couldn't _see him! No, _he _couldn't see _Tom._

Running to his door, he followed after them, hopping down the stairs. "Don't!" he latched onto Snake's arm, pulling at him like he was a _little kid, _and pleading _("beg for it, Alex. If you want it, then _beg _for it.") _because he just couldn't _see _him and-

Snake attempted to detach the childish grip from his arm. "Hey, hey, Cub!" he attempted to soothe the begging and pleading boy. "It's OK,"

But it _wasn't _OK and he didn't get why people kept _lying _to him. And now Eagle was trying to yank him off of Snake and Fox was trying to placate him and Wolf looked oddly concerned- but he didn't _need _it! But suddenly he was pulled off _("you're not strong enough, Alex. You're weak. You're-") _and they were going to get Tom and they were going to-

"I'm not _allowed _to see him!"

He didn't know where the words came from. Didn't know what made them come out- but they did.

Eagle's grip slackened on his arm.

And Eagle just couldn't help it. "What; like some sort of Romeo and Juliet?"

The door slammed shut- Snake and Wolf gone.

* * *

Tom stared at the phone dazedly, the tone dial humming in his hand.

Alex didn't want to…see him?

The idiot hadn't even thought of turning to phone off.

_Unless he wanted you to hear, _something whispered at him.

Doubtfully, he twisted his head to the side. But that's not how Alex _worked. _His methods were unorthodox- yes- dangerous- _yes _– but never…_cold._

That was a vicious way of doing things.

That wasn't how Alex _worked._

In the end, he sat thinking about the ocean-like matter until he heart a car pull up right outside Alex's old gate.

Looking up, oddly nervous, he watched as the window wound down and a blond-

His heart leapt.

"You coming?" voice lilted with a Scottish accent.

His heart dropped.

"Who're you?" Slowly, he stood up and moved towards the gate, swinging his bag over his shoulder and lightly tapping his football along the ground towards the car.

"Tom, right?" the Scotsman had a friendly face, and he gestured towards the car door. "We're Alex's new guardians."

The breath left Tom's chest and he nearly staggered. "New guardians?" his head was spinning, barely aware that his mouth was forming the words.

The blond man was watching him carefully, and Tom attempted to steady his now pale face, aware that everything with Alex began with the word "secret" and ended in "secret". "Yeah, why?"

"I was just-" but his mouth was suddenly dry, the sun suddenly much hotter. He swallowed fruitlessly. "It's just- I just…"

The man smiled, noticing his inner dilemma. "Later. Come on, get in, Alex is waiting for you,"

Tom couldn't hold back the snort at that as he leant down to sweep up his football and clamber into the back of the car.

"So, you never told me your names," Tom clicked the door shut behind him and pulled on his seatbelt.

"Roman," the driver grunted, his grey eyes flickering up to the car mirror to meet his briefly.

"And I'm Corey- nice to meet you,"

Tom muttered an acknowledgment, turning to stare outside the window. "So," he began after a few moments of slightly uncomfortable silence on what Tom knew to be only on his part. "What's Alex done this time?" he kept his voice casual though fierce curiosity burned right through him.

Snake looked back at the boy who sat still staring outside the window, not buying his casual tone for a minute. But, he decided to play along anyway. "We're not too sure, actually," he replied amiably, hiding a smile as Tom turned in obviously forced nonchalance to look at him. "We're only his temporary guardians,"

For some reason, this seemed to put the small teenager at ease, and his shoulders relaxed minimally. "Oh," he murmured.

"Yeah. Apart from that, I'm afraid we can't give you anymore infor-"

"He didn't want to see me." He didn't quite know why he'd blurted it out to these strangers, but he felt for some odd reason that they had a mutual connection. Alex just…did that. He linked people together, people who would never cross paths in an ordinary life. Linked them together with some invisible cord. "I heard him. Is he OK? I mean, I haven't seen him for ages. He went to go to America, you see," he ignored Snake who had twisted round in his seat to watch him. Fingers pressing hard into the cold glass, he watched as his breath fogged up against it, eyes fixed purposefully on the world behind the glass. Was this what Alex felt like when he was forced to attempt to live a normal semblance of life?

"He just suddenly upped and left for America- no warnings, no goodbye- no nothing. Just, gone. We were best mates," he was babbling, he knew. But he couldn't seem to- didn't _want _to stop himself. "Best mates. But he never _said- _he's quiet, isn't he?" he finally looked at Corey.

The sudden question seemed to catch the man off guard and he faltered slightly before Roman cut in with an oak like "yeah".

Tom nodded tersely, turning to look out of the window. "I thought so," he said softly, tracing patterns in the condensation. "He's like that- quiet. But there are different levels of his quietness- different types- you have to watch out for that. He's so…" he flapped his hands around, trying to scramble for the word he wanted, wishing he'd taken his English teachers advice and read more books to widen his vocabulary. "I don't know the word for it. Hard to figure out sometimes," he felt guilty saying it. "But he's good- really, he is. I don't know anyone better, so just- just give him a chance, yeah?"

Bemused and trying to control the feeling that they might be getting somewhere with Cub, Snake smiled at him. "Of course we're giving him a-" he swallowed his impatience as the teen interrupted again.

"No, I don't _mean _that!" he snapped.

_How can you know what I mean when you won't even let me finish my sentence? _He caught the barbed growl before it left his lips, smiling wanly instead back at Tom.

Gesturing and frowning, he leant further back into his seat as the car turned down a relatively quiet street. "It's hard to explain…all I mean is that-I oh I don't know!" he threw up his hands in frustration. "The last time I saw him was about 2 or 3 months ago. Time can do a lot to a person," and for some reason, his voice dropped lower on those words, some odd wisdom lighting up his blue eyes.

Snake nodded sympathy. "We haven't really talked much," he admitted. "Is there anything we should know about him?"

The bark of laughter was unexpected and an odd mix of bitterness, sadness, anger and wistfulness that Snake had ever heard. "Let's just put it this way- if you think you know him, you'd better change that opinion fast- because you really don't,"

A pause passed before Wolf spoke up, his voice low as he drove with his eyes fixed firmly on the road. "Do _you _know Alex?"

Tom paused.

Did he know Alex?

Did he really?

_They weren't beating me up! It was just…play fighting._

…_You didn't have to do that for me._

_Pass the ball, Alex!_

_Damn! My maths homework! Did you do it? Seriously? I can? Thanks, mate!_

_Sometimes…I just think that they don't even know I'm there._

_What? You're a spy? How cool is that!_

…_Alex has gone to America?_

_Alex?_

"I don't know," he said softly. "I thought I did, but…I don't know. I don't think _anyone _really knows Alex. Not even himself." And he turned back to staring outside of the window.

* * *

Pensively, Tom watched as Roman unlocked the door and pushed it inwards, Corey giving him a small encouraging smile before allowing Tom to step in before him.

He knew it was just Corey being kind; but it gave him the feeling of being prison led to his death sentence.

Trying to swallow any apprehension (misguided. Unfair. What had Alex ever done wrong to him? _He left you when you needed him most- _he stopped that train of thought. It was too dangerous to get wrapped into) that he had, he stepped into the house and then stopped- the breath knocked out of him.

"What the _hell _happened to you?" the words left his mouth before he could stop them, eyes wide and mouth hanging open.

Alex stared back, arms hanging loosely at his side.

"What do you mean?" it was Roman who asked that, breaking the suddenly awkward atmosphere.

Swallowing, cursing his big and clumsy mouth, he shook his head, squinting at his friend hard. "You look…" how _did _he look? He wasn't sporting any obvious injuries- in fact, the only thing he could see wrong with him was the bandage peeking out from under his t-shirt sleeves. Then what made him feel like there was-?

"Hey, Tom,"

Unconsciously, he took a wary step back.

That voice.

Something was wrong with it- something had changed within it. That voice was-

"Alex?"

K-Unit exchanged glances. Had they picked up the wrong boy? This kid didn't seem to know Cub at all.

Alex stared blankly back at Tom.

Small Tom with his unruly mop of dark hair, his blue eyes and small stature. Tom with that voice that was so loud- just as untameable as his hair- bursting out at a moment's notice. Tom.

Bitterness washed through him before he could stop it.

Never changing Tom.

Except _Alex _changed, didn't he? _Alex _changed and morphed and twisted into different people and different shapes and- and now _Tom was looking at him like he didn't know him._

_Because he doesn't._

_Then give him the "Alex" he _does _know._

But he was so tired of pulling on that mask. That mask was studded with shards of glass coated in poison.

_Pull it on._

Tom relaxed as Alex loosened his posture, lips curving up slightly, his brown eyes soulful but _warm. _Not cold like they had been before. "Hey, Tom."

And that was how K-Unit first saw Alex's 360 degree turn in personality.

Eagle coughed, drawing the attention of all stood in the hallway. "Anyone want tea?"

* * *

Tom stared awkwardly into his cup of tea, too hot to sip although Tom really wanted to sip at it- do something that would just _use up time._

"I hear you're living with Jerry, now,"

Tom looked up to see Alex looking at him, brown eyes doing that annoying assessing thing.

He nodded shortly. "Yeah, just until things cool down, you know. We don't know what's happening legally, but it's cool so far," he shrugged with forced carelessness.

Alex nodded slowly. "But everything else is OK at home?" it was voiced as a question.

_You'd know if you didn't just leave! _The brutal comment was meant to be just a thought, but from the way Alex briefly looked hurt, Tom started as he realised the words had actually left his lips.

"Sorry," he mumbled after a tense pause.

Alex managed to dredge up a smile. "Don't worry about it. I understand if you-"

"No, that's the problem. You _don't _understand," Tom put the cup down onto the coffee table with perhaps more force than was necessary. "You just _left, _Alex. Not _one _word, not _one _phone call,"

Tom noticed how Alex's eyes strayed to the four men who sat in the living room with them- an obvious plea to be quiet, but Tom ignored him.

"What _happened, _Alex? I thought we were friends. But you just disappear one day- I was in _hospital- _you just disappear, and when I'm out, I hear you've gone. Just like that,"

"Things happened," his friend's voice was soft.

Tom scowled at him. "Things _always _happen with you," and he pretended not to notice the barely covered hurt that washed across Alex's face. "But now you're back. It would've been nice to receive a phone call, you know, some sort of notice that you were OK." A sudden thought struck him and his eyes narrowed. "How long have you been back in England then, anyway?" he asked suspiciously.

Alex gazed right back at him, meeting his eyes. "Things got busy," was the candlewax reply.

For a moment, Tom stared at him, and then he pulled back, wounded. "You've been back a while, haven't you. A month? Two? And you didn't even bother to call me."

"Things have been busy!" and there it was again, that odd sound in Alex's voice that he had heard over the phone not too long ago. What was it? It sounded familiar.

Pushing the thought aside, he kept going, determined to get some answers for once. "I only needed a text Alex- anything. I wasn't asking you to come to my house towing a parade along!" his voice was getting steadily louder. Suddenly remembering that it wasn't just him and Alex in the room, he snapped his mouth shut.

"I missed you."

Alex looked up at Tom who had muttered the words, the cup of tea now clasped securely in his hands.

"Ryan said," Alex offered.

Tom wilted.

That wasn't the right reply.

Where was the: "_Of course you did, idiot"? _Or the sarcastic but true "_I missed you too"?_

"What've you been up to?" Tom had to clear his throat; it had gone gravelly from his collision into his thoughts. Trying to swallow down the hurt that welled up in him, he glanced around at the four men lounged on different sofa's, all talking softly but no doubt able to hear what was being said. Tom leant forward. "And what's with these guys?" he kept his voice low.

"Protection," was the blunt reply. It was obvious that Alex didn't want to go into it.

Lips pursed, he pulled back. "When you went to America-"

Alex closed his eyes.

"I heard that you went to go and live with Sabina and her family,"

K-Unit perked up, listening in.

"What was that like?"

"Horrible," Alex whispered.

"What?" Tom looked sharply at Alex and did a double take.

He looked…_fragile _at that moment. And that odd tone was back in his voice again (what _was _it?).

"Cub?" Roman had stood up (evidence that they were listening) and was watching Alex (why'd he call him 'Cub'?) concernedly. "You OK, kid?"

Alex visibly shook himself. "I'm fine," the reply was mechanical, something Tom was used to- and if he deciphered the frustration that flitted across the four (powerful, strong. He could sense it) men's faces right- he knew that they were used to it too.

"The Pleasure's…didn't work out?" the question was lame, and Tom cursed himself for it. Of _course _it didn't work out! That much was obvious.

"America…" Alex's voice wasn't all _there._ His eyes were distant and foggy- and in that moment Tom knew that they weren't fixed entirely on reality- that he'd forgotten they were there.

Coldness swept through him.

Had MI6 finally done it? Had they finally driven his friend mad?

"_It'll kill you one day, Alex!" Tom yelled, clenching his fists to his side._

_Alex just looked at him, gave him that gaze that said so much- so much- and he never _understood _what it meant! He could never work out just what that gaze was filled with!_

"_Don't look at me like that." He snapped, taking a step forward. "I _hate _it when you look at me like that!"_

_Alex lowered his gaze like that of autumn leaves falling sleepily from a willow tree. "Of course it'll kill me," and his voice was so snowfall soft that Tom hardly caught it._

"_What?" the answer was so unexpected that he found his anger momentarily snuffed out._

_A smile (gentle, not quite mocking, but not quite real, either) curled upon his lips. "It won't kill me like that though. Not how you think. You think it'll be a bullet to the head- maybe if I'm not so lucky a dank torture chamber somewhere, right?" he looked up, that annoyingly velvet _understanding _in his eyes._

_Tom flinched, tossing his gaze to the ground to try and hide the guilt that rolled in there._

_No matter, Alex had already seen. The smile drooped slightly, but was infuriatingly there all the same (why didn't he _cry _like Tom had when his parents had announced a divorce? Why didn't he wail and beg for help like he had when he'd stupidly smashed his hand through a glass window? Why did he always have to be the _strong _one?) on his face. "It'll drive me mad first,"_

_Tom looked up, horrified._

_But Alex wasn't looking at him anymore. His eyes were fixed elsewhere, an odd expression on his face. "It'll drive me mad- but it won't kill me. It won't kill me," and when he finally did look at Tom, he wished (before he could stop it) that Alex hadn't. That he'd stayed locked up in whatever world he'd been wandering. Because his eyes were so cold, so cold and…_frightening.

"_I'm not an easy person to kill."_

_And the words weren't said with cockiness or confidence. Just soft weariness. The weariness of that of a cockroach. Forever running, being hit, slammed, kicked- but never dying._

_And Tom couldn't take it. He'd turned it into a joke of some sort, dragging Alex off too "loosen up a little" and forced himself to forget that brief glimpse into his friend that Alex had shown him._

_Alex never did talk about things like that again._

Tom's conscious was snapped back to the present as Alex began speaking again. "People lie, Tom." And his eyes were so haunted- so hourglass heavy that Tom wished he'd never asked, wished Alex would _stop looking like that _and go back to how he was before (how was he before? It was such a long time ago now…). And now Alex was _looking at him _and he wished he wouldn't- wished he wouldn't pull up memories of regret and _(you should've asked him why he thought that. You should've told him to talk to you. Instead, you made it into a big joke- didn't you? You couldn't handle it, could you?) _past wrongs. "People lie and pretend and act and try to _use you, _Tom." His eyes were burning, ferocious. It was frightening. "Don't ever let them use you, Tom,"

"I won't," he squeaked, leaning away from this- this- _terror _in front of him. This wasn't Alex! He didn't know who this person-

And the look died from Alex's face. He pulled back, eyes heavy. "I don't want to talk about America,"

Choking out an almost hysterical laugh, Tom shook his head wildly. "Forget it, then! Let's talk about- let's- where's Jack? Did she come back with you?"

"Jack?" Corey piped up, cringing back as Wolf glared at him and Eagle and Fox jointly elbowed him in the side.

Tom turned to them curiously. They didn't know something as simple as that? "His housekeeper turned guardian,"

_Guardian? _Eagle exchanged a baffled look with Snake. But what about Cub's parents?

Tom turned back to Alex. "Is she OK?" he looked around him. "Is she here with you?"

Alex smiled gently at him, and for some reason, Tom felt pinned.

"No, she's fine though,"

Feeling a little relieved at the sane comment, he smiled hesitantly. "Where is she now?"

Alex watched Tom until the boy squirmed under his _not-all-there _gaze.

Where _was _Jack?

Such an odd question.

He _had _ventured back into the land of timelessness though, so she was probably at home, cooking scrambled eggs and humming songs under her breath.

"At home," he smiled (a real smile? Or just an echo of one?).

"I…knocked but no one came to the door," Tom's voice was oddly meek.

Really?

"Hmm." Alex dragged a _coldcoldcold _finger across the sofa (what was he _doing? _He didn't want to think about _redhairscrambledeggsmusicalv oice-_Jack. He didn't want to-) "She probably went out to get some more eggs."

And there was something, something in Alex's eyes that told Tom that asking anymore questions would not be a good idea.

So, in true Tom fashion, he told a funny story.

"You haven't _heard _about Sasha Tolle and Warren, have you? Here, let me tell you…"

* * *

Thanking Corey for the lift back home, he stepped waved the man off and turned, stepping into his parent's garden and wishing that Jerry hadn't picked today to go over and check on their parents. After today's events…he didn't think he could deal with walking into another argument.

Taking a deep breath, he slid his key into the lock and briefly closed his eyes.

Unlocking the door with a foreboding _click _he stepped into the house. "Mum? Dad? Jerry?" he called cautiously into the building, locking the door behind him.

"In here, Tom!" Jerry's voice called.

Heartened by the lack of raised voices, he stepped into the kitchen to see Jerry tucking into a pile of fish and chips with his parents who smiled at him when he stepped in- though it was tight, it was still a smile.

"Good day, kiddo?" Jerry called.

He paused. Was it? "I suppose," he decided upon instead. A safer option.

"Would you like some fish and chips, Tommy?" his mum asked, _still _insisting on calling him that babyish version of his name that she had cooed at him when he was a baby.

"Yeah, please," he sat down, scraping it in underneath him.

"Who'd you go and see?" Jerry asked through a mouthful of food as their mum got up to bustle around and get a new plate.

"Alex," he said.

Jerry's eyebrow's raised, but apart from that, he looked unfazed. Briefly, Tom wished he could be a little more chilled out like his brother. "What, like, the Rider kid? Teenage spy and all that?"

"Jerry!" he hissed, glancing at his dad who luckily was engrossed in his own fish and chips.

He shrugged and rubbed a fish and chip greased hand fondly through his hair, Tom yelping and ducking away. "Right. Classified, right?"

"Yeah," he grumbled, smoothing down his hair.

"Cool." Jerry grinned.

Their mum entered back into the room, balancing some glasses along with the plate.

"Careful, mum, you don't want to-"

Too late.

She squeaked as a glass fell and shattered against the floor, the pieces cascading like fragments of crystal across the floor.

And then suddenly there was yelling.

Again.

Jerry cast him an apologetic look, grabbing up his arm and muttering that it was time they left.

But Tom hardly heard, eyes fixed on the sparkling glass on the floor.

He'd finally worked out what that tone was to Alex's voice.

Splintering glass.

Shattering glass.

Breaking.

* * *

K-Unit had decided to talk to Alex about today's visit when Snake got back in, but luck just didn't seem to be on their side today.

As soon as Snake stepped quickly through the door; the phone rang.

Giving each other frustrated looks, Wolf moved towards the phone. "Hello?"

The rest of the unit watched as Wolf conversed with the person over the phone, their leaders brow furrowing and eyes become darker and confused.

Finally, Wolf put the phone down, and he turned to give the m all exasperated looks. "That was Blunt's secretary on the phone,"

Alex looked up from his now cold cup of tea.

Wolf's eyes turned disapprovingly onto him. "He wants you back at school tomorrow," from the thin line that made his mouth, it was very obvious that Wolf wasn't pleased.

School?

As in…Brooklands?

But…_why?_

"Cub?"

Something was going on. Something was happening.

Alex turned his head to the side.

Oh he knew.

Blunt had decided to get things moving.

That mission that he had spoken about would be soon, he knew it _(I'm not scared. I'm not scared. Promise. Promise)_.

Forcing a grim smile (but it _wasn't _a smile. What right had he to call it that?) he nodded softly. "School. Right."

Game start.

* * *

"Sorry about that, Tom,"

"Hmm?"

Jerry glanced over at his kid brother, noticing his distraction. "I mean," he turned the wheel up towards their flat-a small block in a quiet area- mostly occupied by old people who wanted a retreat from the noisy youth filled areas. Not quite his taste, but hey- beggars can't be choosers, right? "I thought they'd calmed down. It was fine for a few hours, but they were already quite tense, I guess. I suppose the glass breaking was just a chance to let it all out,"

Glass, breaking, shattering. "Hm," his eyes landed on the object on the dashboard. Slowly, a smile slid onto his face, momentarily forgetting Alex and the enigma he carried with the name. Pointing at the object, he grinned. "What, these from Brooke?"

Jerry snorted. "Yeah right," he shook his head. As if he'd accept flowers from _that _stalker. Oh well. At least his little brother didn't have that lost look on his face anymore. Pulling into a parking lot, he smiled widely. "Actually, they were from some lady down the street. Asked whether I wanted them," he turned the key in the ignition, listening to the croak of his engine die down. "Got the wrong ones, apparently,"

Tom lifted it up, staring at it apprehensively. "What are they?"

Jerry wrinkled his nose, one hand on the car door to let himself out. "Begonia's, 21 of them. But the lady sure was _pretty,"_

"You get her number?" Tom shoved the flowers back at Jerry as they climbed out of the car.

"Nah," he dropped them into the bin on the way out. "She looked a little whacko. I prefer the sane type, you know,"

"Yeah," Tom watched the bin lid clatter shut. "I know,"

* * *

**AN-DONE! OOOHHHH! AND THE PLOT BEGINS TO UNRAVEL! Boom! Oh yeah! I'm running on Cola, Jelly Babies and chocolate at the moment! Can you tell? I'm so excited to write _mooorree! _I can't wait! Ooh! So, do tell me what you think! **

**I hope I don't ruin the mood with this, but, uh, well, I was thinking- hoping, um… I'm not GOOD AT ASKING FOR THINGS! But…REVIEW!**

**DON'T GET ME WRONG! The reviews I _do _receive are wonderful beyond words and I give you all my extreme gratitude and plenty of cheesecake (take it. Take it). But, for those who don't review (I don't know why, maybe you don't quite know what to say? That's OK, I get that too, sometimes) But look at it this way:**

**It's kind of like someone giving you a present, right? Took quite a lot of time to find and make this present. You take the present and then walk away without saying anything.**

**BUT THE PERSON WHO GAVE YOU THE PRESENT WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU THINK OF IT! O:**

**I'm only saying this because I love you all (I mean, I've never met you before, but I'm sure you're all wonderful) and really _care _about what you have to say about my story- I'm not guilt tricking you into anything. But, please if you don't have anything constructive to say, don't bother saying it. Reviews are what keep me writing! (that and my love of writing for YOOOUUU!) **

**So thank you for reading! _The plot is finally unfurling!_ Keep reading! It's only getting started!**

**Oh. And I have a new idea for a new Alex Rider story. Wanna know? Ask nicely, children. *grins***


	8. Chapter 8

**AN- First off...THANK YOU FOR YOUR REVIEWS! Keep it up guys- seriously, you're fantastic motivators- I just wanted you to all know that.**

**Second off...I HAVE A PRESENT OF THANKS FOR YOU AT THE BOTTOM! Anyone know what it is? (You see, my dears? It works both ways ;) **

**Anyway, enjoy!**

* * *

"You can't sulk forever, Wolf,"

Wolf snapped his head up and scowled at Fox. "I'm _not _sulking," he barked, narrowing his eyes at the very insinuation that he was _sulking,_

Fox rolled his eyes, leaning his spoon against the side of his cereal bowl. "You've been grumpy ever since we got the call last night for Cub to go back to school," Fox watched as Wolf's expression darkened once again at the mention of school.

"It's stupid," Wolf snapped, his fingers clenching at the worktop. "How are we meant to protect him if he's in school? We're his guardi- _guards!_" he quickly changed.

Fox raised one eyebrow.

"_And _Blunt said that it would be _three weeks _before he had to go back to school!" angrily, he grit his teeth. "Why the sudden change of mind?"

"Are you sure it's not because you'll miss him?" Snake pointed out, spooning some cereal into his mouth.

After a tense pause in which Wolf attempted to stare down Snake who was ignoring him, Wolf cleared his throat, deciding to be the man of the situation and let go. "No," he growled, turning to speak to Fox (Snake wasn't even _part _of the conversation! How could he say that he would- didn't he _know _Wolf?) again, pointedly turning his back on Snake. "It's unprecedented, ridiculous, they didn't give us any forewarning, and it's downright _dangerous _for him to be out alone in school. We don't even know what the threat is yet!"

"We can go and pick him up and drop him off at school. It'll be OK," Fox said calmly.

If the lowering of Wolf's eyebrows was anything to go by, their mighty leader _did not _look appeased. "What about when he's _in _school? Who's going to look after him then, huh?" he said through clenched teeth. "We were attacked in a _park _just a day ago. A _park. _You know, the places people wheel their babies about, go on dates at, feed ducks at, take their family out at, play-"

"I know!" Fox finally shouted; eyes angry.

Wolf snapped his mouth shut, a little surprised at Fox's outburst.

Running a frustrated hand down his face, Fox put his bowl on the countertop. "I know," he said, quiet this time, eyes locked near the floor, Snake watching them. "I'm sorry. It's just…something's not right about all of this. MI6 are hiding something. And Alex…" he frowned, chewing absently at the side of his mouth. "MI6 are planning something." He looked up finally, and his gaze was hard, flinty. "I'm sure of it. Those papers that they gave Alex. What are they?"

Snake and Wolf swapped a look.

Snake turned back to Fox, no longer eating his cereal. "I don't know,"

Fox nodded, expecting the answer. "We need to find out what are in them." He looked around, train of thought broken as a new one struck him. "Where's Eagle?"

Snake snorted, twisting back around in his chair to resume eating his cereal. "Upstairs with Alex- from what happened in the forest with the bomb, he seems scared that Alex will disappear into thin air on us,"

* * *

"Have you got all your school books?"

"Yes,"

"What about your lunch?"

"Downstairs,"

"School uniform?"

"Cupboard,"

"You sure you're not taking a little too long getting ready?"

"Eagle. You're using my time."

"Oh."

Alex sighed as he wandered to the cupboard to pull out his school uniform. For a moment, he just stared at the material and tie. He never thought he'd ever have to wear this again. Gently, he ran his hand down the material- not soft, a little rough and coarse. Dragging his fingers through the folds and creases of the cloth, his eyes latched onto the insignia sewn onto its chest, silently mouthing the name of his school. It was a different world- school. A different world entirely.

"Cub?"

He spun around, clutching the garment up to his chest.

Eagle blinked at him from his position on the bed, legs crossed beneath him. "You OK?"

Glaring, a little unnerved at being so off-guard _("always remain aware of your surroundings,") _he muttered something that even _he _didn't know what it was and turned to get changed, attempting to ignore Eagle's presence in the room.

_Do you _really _want him to see your scars?_

It didn't _matter, _he thought angrily, though his hands hesitated at undoing the buttons to his pyjama top. Scars were inconsequential! Insignificant!

_Are you sure? _The malignant voice hissed, digging its hands into his shoulders and forcing Alex to look at it's ugly- ugly _(whose _face _was that? He knew this voice…he _knew _it. But who- who was it?) _face, breath hot and ferocious- animalistic, Alex bowed beneath its words- a battered tree under a spiteful storm

_Scars tell stories, Alex. But they don't speak for you. You'll have to speak them. Open your mouth and let loose all of those ugly little tales; those hideous things that follow you wherever you-_

"I want to get changed," Alex turned to Eagle who sat on the bed, head down, looking at-

Alex's eyes widened.

Sudden movement out of the corner of Eagle's eye made him jerk back.

And just in time, too.

Alex swiped at the piece of paper that was held away from him by Eagle, a teasing smile already curving on the man's lips. "Put it down," he kept his voice soft, eyes latched onto the paper.

Ignoring him and frowning at the paper, Eagle tapped it with one finger. "Is this from the box that you brought home yesterday?"

_'Brought home'._

Blankly, Alex gazed at the man.

_Brought home._

It wasn't- this wasn't _home! ("Can we go home now, Ian?...Please? I promise I'll be good- I promise. I just- I just really don't…really don't like it here," puffs of chalk-dust air, heavy noises and creaking floorboards. "Please?") _Home was- home was _(Ian?) _not here! Home was _(Jack?)- _home was…

"Hello? Anyone home?" Eagle snatched his hand back from waving it in front of his eyes as Alex's hand snapped out to hit it. Holding the near-damaged appendage far away from Cub, he watched the teenager warily. "Alright, Cub! Calm down!"

"Give it back," he was an idiot _("stupid!" "Moron!" "Imbecile!") _for just leaving the paper lying under his bed- what an amateurish mistake to make!

Eagle frowned at him, still (frustratingly) holding the paper away from Alex. "How would you even understand any of this stuff? It's all physics and equations,"

Scowling, still reaching for the paper, Alex tried to swipe at it. "I don't-" wait a second.

_Physics and equations?_

"Do you understand it?"

Eagle blinked at the sudden change in Alex. One moment he was almost _playfully _(except that look in his eye, metallic and hard was _not _playful) batting at the paper, and the next he was soft, quiet, _intense._

Rubbing the bridge of his nose, Eagle smiled bemusedly, keeping an eye on Cub "Sure. I had quite an interest in science before I joined the SOD," he tapped the paper again. "These aren't easy, Cub. I don't know where you got them, or what level you're working at, but I'm pretty sure school wouldn't have taught you _anything _at this level yet," his brow furrowed. "Even I'm finding this quite difficult even though I got a master's degree in physics,"

When no reply seemed forthcoming, Eagle looked up, and was amused and slightly put-out to see Alex's incredulous expression. "What, you think I couldn't get a master's degree?"

Blinking, trying to process what he'd just been told, Alex shook his head slowly. "Rather, I wonder what the world is coming to if you can manage to get a master's degree in _physics _of all things,"

Fondly, Eagle snorted. "Cheeky, Cub," and he reached out once again and ruffled Cub's hair, staring when Alex pushed his head into the movement, an odd expression flitting briefly across the teens face.

Carefully, Eagle ruffled the blond locks again, gently.

Alex closed his eyes, feeling _contact. _Warm, _wanted _contact.

When was the last time someone had ruffled his hair? An adult had teased him playfully? Someone had spoken in a voice that said that they actually _cared _about him? Him, Alex Rider. Just Alex Rider.

"You OK, Cub?"

Alex's eyes immediately snapped open, and he jerked back, his head twisted to the side to hide the expression on his face _(sad? Or was it happy? Angry? Confused?). _"Yeah,"

Eagle was not convinced. He opened his mouth to say as much when there was suddenly the sound of shouting downstairs and what could only be described as the sound of Snake's laughter.

Swapping looks, they turned to see the door swung open, a flushed looking Fox stood there with a tense expression.

Alex stiffened, back going straight whilst Eagle shrank back slightly, wondering what he had done this time, gazing at the angry looking man in the doorway. He shrank back even further as a finger pointed to him sharply. Eagle raised his hands halfway, dropping the paper in his fist, mouth already open and ready to form his defensive words but Fox cut him to it.

"You- out. We're _late,_" Fox swung his eyes over to Alex, and the look softened somewhat. "Get changed quickly Cub,"

Alex stood up slowly and opened his mouth to ask something when the sound of running up the stairs caught their attention.

Snake shoved his way into the room, breathless with laughing, the sound of Wolf's roar hot on his tail. Eyes sparkling, spluttering through laughter, he gripped onto the doorframe and quickly managed to gasp out: "Wolf turned all the clocks back in the house!" before Wolf flew into the room with a noisy clatter, his face red.

"No I didn't!" he bellowed over the sounds of Snake's and Eagle's laughter.

Fox gripped Wolf and Snake's shoulder (one of whom was trying to evade being attacked by the other during throes of laughter, the other trying to attack the other during yells of innocence) glared once at Eagle and dragged the two wrestling men out of the room,

Eagle slid off of the bed, grinning, a mischievous light dancing rebelliously in his eye. Oh, he was going to have _fun _with this one. "See you later, Cub," he called in a sing-songy voice, moving up to the door. "Get changed quickly."

Alex blinked as the door slammed shut, and could only sit there, staring confusedly at the door and wondering what that squirmywarmtingly feeling was in his chest- and whether or not he should let it out and see what it wanted from him.

As he felt the uncomfortablewrongpainful feeling of something _(cold and wet and- "Shh…it's OK now, Al. It's OK- I've got you," red hair soft breaths. "Hey, Alex! It's OK- yeah? It's just a welcome party!") _stinging at his eyes, he decided not to let it out, although for some odd reason, along with that feeling came the tugging at the corners of his mouth.

Standing up, he blanked it out.

How odd.

* * *

"We're going to be late," Eagle remarked in a too-cheerful voice from his seat in the car, causing Snake to muffle an explosive laugh in the palm of his hand, Wolf glaring at him though Snake pretended not to notice.

"Well we can just thank _Wolf _for that, now, can't we?" Fox drawled, turning the necessary corner with one sharply irritated movement.

"You should thank me," Wolf said stiffly to the window, very pointedly ignoring a sniggering Snake and Eagle,

"Yes," Fox's voice was smooth, his eyes deadly and lips stretched in a grim charcoal smile. "Thank you for very purposefully changing out alarms and clocks." He laughed once, humourlessly.

"What a lifesaver," another angry jerk at the steering wheel.

Wolf looked ready to retort something back but Fox carried on in that liquid voice of his.

"Is it going to be a problem you being late, Cub?"

For a moment, Alex could only stare at the side of his head.

Of course it would be a problem.

He hadn't been in school for months; when he was there last time, a sniped had taken a shot into his classroom- definitely not the best time to suddenly get 'ill'. Of _course _turning up late would cause problems. It meant walking into an already started class; enduring stares (how he _hated _it when they _looked _at him like that), whispers (what did they even know about him?) and the teacher giving him that you-again? look.

Those thoughts passed through his head, and he opene his mouth to say just that when something stopped him.

Something being that- that he didn't want them to- he didn't-

He didn't want to trouble them (he sounded like he cared but he couldn't care and he didn't care- not really he'd nevercarehe'dnevercarebecause-).

"No problem at all," Alex smiled at him, a gentle pull of the lips.

Fox sighed softly, shoulders dropping in relief _(I did that. _Me. _I got someone to do something positive. I made someone _happy), ignoring the small voice at the back of his head that doubted the validity of that statement. "That's good,"

The rest of the journey was easy, the sounds of Eagle poking fun at Wolf, Snake trying his best to hold back his laughter, Fox jumping in now and then to add his own half-cent to the conversation and Alex remaining quiet thinking of _school _and _a time before now _and thoughts that tugged and tangled and pulled and clawed and writhe and-

"We're here."

Alex snapped back to the present.

Fox drummed his fingers against the dashboard and stooped slightly to gain a better (and critical) view of the drab and grey building.

A brief pulse of silence passed.

And of course Eagle had to break it, squinting hard at the building with displeasure written plainly across his face, he swung his head round to look at the people in the car, his voice obviously displeased. "Looks more like a prison than a- _ow!_" Eagle whipped his head round to glare at Snake, rubbing at his side in hurt. "What was _that _for?"

"Think a bit before you speak, will you?" Snake snapped, rolling his eyes in exasperation and glancing at Cub to make sure the kid hadn't been embarrassed by what Eagle had so thoughtlessly said.

Wolf turned to glare at them all, voice accusative. "You see? If it looks like a prison, it's definitely not safe to send Cub here," Wolf spoke loudly.

"Oh _great. _You see what you've started?" Snake hissed to a scowling Eagle.

"_Don't _start up again, Wolf," Ben interrupted, voice cold.

"I'm just saying-"

"I _knew _we should have left him at home,"

"See? Even _Snake _knows what I mean!"

"He meant you, Wolf,"

"What? No he-"

"Mutiny! Treason! Can you-"

"Shut _up _Eagle!"

"This is so-"

A sharp ringing tore everyone's heads to stare wide eyed at the school.

The bell stopped sharply.

Awkward silence filled the car.

Alex breathed out once. "There goes my first lesson," he said softly, making K-Unit wince.

"Sorry, Cub," Snake murmured, attempting to break the uncomfortable silence.

Alex turned to look at them all, taking in their unhappy expressions- Wolf's sulky glare at his knees, Eagle's childishly embarrassed frown up to the ceiling of the car, Snake's crossed arms and grumpy expression and Fox's slightly apologetic but cross glower at the steering wheel.

Something glassy and crystal twitched inside Alex.

It wasn't expecred, and it was alarming, really, at how fast it came. But it did.

K-Unit gaped at Cub as he dissolved into pastel shades of laughter, one hand pressed firmly (almost desperately) against his rose-petal curling mouth in a futile attempt to hold the sounds in.

Fixing their gapes when Cub turned mirth filled eyes onto them, they stared as _for once_ Cub's expression didn't harshly retreat as it usually did; but lingered like summer spray on his face. Recovered from his laughter, but the emotion still rolling and swimming orange around him, he passed his hand away from his (still _smiling_) mouth. "I'll see you after school," was the warm (Cub…being _warm?_) statement.

Eagle was the first to snap out of their stupefied trance. "Yeah, have a good day, kiddo,"

Hastily, the remaining men called out their best wishes.

Alex looked at them with something close to…attachment in his (for once. Just like a door) complicatedly open eyes. "Yeah, I will." And he got out and closed the door, leaving the now silent K-Unit sure that there had been a hundred collapsible statements in those three words.

* * *

Standing outside in the school grounds alone, staring up at the school in front of him, Alex swayed as a sudden bout of dizziness overcame him.

He suddenly didn't feel too much like going to school.

Something cool passé through his eyes, and he took a decisive step backwatds.

Why waste time in school when he could be put finding out about those papers?

Another purposeful step backwards-

Then flinched as something stirred inside him, that voice that he had kept _locked up, (in that room! Why was it speaking now? It should be choking on cobwebs, muted by dust! Then why-) _it's feathery voice fluttering apprehensively and vanilla in his ears. _But…you don't want to disappoint Wolf, Snake, Eagle and Fox now, do you? _the faltering vouce murmured anxiously.

And somehow, he found himself _listening _to that accursed voice, and blocked out the screams and threats of the voice that shouted him back.

* * *

"Miss Bedfordshire?"

The young secretary looked up at the quiet voice, a kind smile already in place. "How may I-" she cut herself off and could only stare at the teenager in front of her, her fingers dropping the red biro clutched her right hand; making no move to stop it as it rolled off of the desk. "Alex?" she near choked.

The teenager quirked one quizzical eyebrow at her, lips curved into a smile of impatient bemusement.

But of _course _it was Alex. Lightly, she blushed as the idiocy of her comment sunk in. "Ah, yes." She cleared her throat self-consciously. "Mr Bray did mention something about a student coming back- I just didn't expect it to be you." seeing the increased height of Alex's eyebrow arching, she hurriedly tried to change the subject. "It's nice to have you back, Alex,"

Miss Bedfordshire flinched as Alex's eyes went cold –_mechanical. _The look vanished, leaving the secretary flustered and more than a little anxious. Alex nodded, a small smile fixed in place- though it seemed to her that Alex's eyes weren't really registering _her. _More like he was just seeing another human being. "Thank you," and the voice was suddenly silk laden with rolling drops of honey- intoxicating in its _power. _Not at all right for a fifteen year old to have. "Could I please have my school timetable?"

Picking up her jaw and hastily snapping her mouth shut, she flashed him a quick smile. "Of course. One moment please," after a few (tense) moments, she finished sorting out the document printed it, collected it hurriedly and handed it over to Alex, concern playing about in her eyes. Just as Alex was about to turn away, she called out in one slightly loud and almost cracking voice.

Turning around inquisitively, he peered at her, a hint of guarded steel in his brown eyes. "Yes?"

For one moment, punned under those incomprehensibly _brown _(darkdarkdark like an abyss or a starless night) eyes, she quailed. Forcing a shaky smile, she shook her head, eyes flickering down to her work, hands playing with the edge of the table. "Never mind. Just…have a good day."

Nodding once, he turned around again and made his way up to his lesson.

In an almost dreamlike state, Alex descended up the stairs.

_1 step, 2 step, 3 step, 4 step…9 step- wait- what happened to the rest of the steps?_

Alex paused confusedly on the stairs, and it took him a moment to work out that his focus had drifted whilst counting his steps- resulting in not counting the others.

_Numbers, _Alex thought, resuming his walk up the stairs. _I love numbers. _They were so straight, so rigid, held so much _order- _the complete opposite to Alex's life.

The pondering led him to a thoughtful step outside his English class' door, wishing vaguely that he didn't have the subject.

_So this is it, then,_ he mused without any real humour.

Shifting his bag (light. How many terms had he missed?) to a more reassuring position on his back, Alex knocked once- firmly, with authority- pushed the door open- and stepped in.

* * *

Regina Baldwin was bored.

The teacher- Mr McKing- had spotted her chewing on her gum- her _only _form of entertainment!- and had immediately ordered her to spit it into the bin. Grimacing, pursing her lips to clearly say that she was _Not Happy, _she strode up to the bin and physically spat (saliva and all) the gum into the bin, noting her teacher's repulsed expression and the class' muffled giggles.

Smiling in self-satisfaction, she flounced back to her seat and sat down in it, pointedly placing her elbows on the table and staring at the floor.

Mr McKing cleared his throat and just carried on about Shakespeare in that _blahblahblah dull _voice of his.

Sighing, wishing that at least _one _of her friends was sat next to her in the empty seat on her right (she'd been moved to the back after supposedly _"talking too much". _Ha. Yeah right. The teacher was talking just as much as she had been. They just _happened _to be overlapping each other. At least _she _was talking about more important stuff- not about some dead person who liked to kill lovers) to make time go faster, she swung her gaze around the class again; evaluating boy hotness (the level was pretty low in this year) to loserishness, who was intereste in who, whether that girl really had a problem with her- glaring like that- or whether she just had constipation- and oter serious issues like that. Sighing melodramatically and receiving a glance from the boy next to her (level 2 in hotness, she decided critically) she flopped her hand over her forehead. Why was she even _here, _wasting her life away lie this? She didn't want _'Regina Baldwin- received 2 C's in her English GCSE's' _inscribed onto her gravestone! How rubbish would_ that _be?

Sighing once again, a little louder this time, just to irritate Mr McKing, she flopped one ankle onto the empty chair next to her, decided the pain wasn't worth It to look cool, pulled it off and stared at the back of Harris' head.

Hm. Harris.

Leaning forward onto one hand propped up with an elbow, she pursed her lips thoughtfully. Harris- the runt of year 7 and 8, finally levelling off into someone who _wasn't _in the loser zone. Sure, she mused, still staring at the back of his head, he was a little small, but he was funny and had a great personality. And, not to mention that those blue eyes of his were _gorgeous._

Smiling, happier now, moving off from the category of Not Happy to Not Going To Bite Your Head Off In The Next Five Seconds, she considered whether or not to flick rolled up pieces of paper at his head to capture his attention.

Two confident knocks halted her tearing of the textbook and whispering babbles of the boy next to her to stop (Level 1 now. Dangerously close to Loserville territory). Curiously, along with the rest of the class, she looked up as their teacher called the person in.

The door opened.

Regina's mouth hung open, her manicured fingers pressing into the desk, hardly noticinghow Harris jerked up in his seat or how the rest of the class sucked in gasps of surprise.

Blond hair flashed in the lights, and fell lazily into two deep brown eyes surrounded by golden lashes that flapped like twin butterflies every now and then to displace the hair that tangled within the sinfully long lashes. (Write that down Regina! Write that down!) The boy stood posed within the doorway, the whisper of a bemused smile dancing softly on his (wow. Oh _wow_) pink lips, head tilted in that slight way that just _screamed _authority.

Regina leant forwards further, hazel eyes wide, chewing on her lips and smiling in anticipation. _Oooh…_she _knew _who this was. This was-

"Alex Rider," Mr McKing nodded.

"Sorry I'm late, sir," and wasn't his voice _delicious. _Low and smooth like honet spread on silk, silk spread on honey- but beware the bees. His voice was _dangerous._

Regina grinned. From now on, she _loved _dangerous.

Mr McKing frowned, obviously displeased at Alex but a little wary of the teen stood in front of him too. "A word after class, Rider," he said stiffly, and then his eyes swept across the room. "Find an empty seat, we're just going through Romeo and Juliet at the moment. If you don't have a book, you'll have to share for now or just listen."

_An empty seat. _

The one next to Regina lit up like a beacon.

Very casually (boys _liked _casual) she gestured coolly to the seat next to her.

Alex's eyes moved towards her, taking in her beautifullt tanned face and newly done red hair- and, of course, her gorgeous hazel eyes.

Mr McKing did not look to certain as she gestured to the seat, but Alex was already slipping forward to the seat next to her.

Pulling out the chair, nodding once to Harris, he sat.

And completely ignored her.

Regina blinked and momentarily forgot her put –out-ness as she observed his full godliness under one appreciative eye.

And she _liked _what she saw.

Finally, after minutes of staring, two chocolate eyes swerved onto her.

"Can I help you?"

* * *

The reactions of the class to his arrival were what Alex had expected.

Seeing Tom sat gaping at him was not.

But before he could smile (real? Or fake?) or do anything else to make contact with his friend, Mr McKing had snapped out of his dumb expression and fixed Alex with a guarded gaze, distrust and unease showing plainly through his eyes. "Alex Rider," he had said.

What was _with _people and feeling the need to reaffirm his name when they saw him? Instead of voicing his irritated opinion, he apologized for being late- thought, fairly, it wasn'this fault. Then of _course _nosey Mr McKing had demanded to talk to him afterwards and _of course _her was directed to an empty seat.

Turning his eyes (deceitfully calm) onto the still gaping (so innocent. They _never _had to mask their emotions. How he _hated_-) teenagers, he caught sight of a hand waving. Coolly, he assesse the person offering him a seat.

_Orange face- toomuch fake tan, heavily dyed hair- breaking, too much mascara- can hardly see her eyes._

_ Threat level- 12% (may pose risk due to flirtation *note dilation of pupils)_

Deeming her threat level low enough, he made his way over to the empty seat, nodding to Tom's burning gaze before he sat down- a silent _later_- and then sat down in his seat, noticing that the girl who had gestured at him didn't even have a book, but had a torn science textbook open instead. Turning, he watched the teacher- nothing else to do but listen and try to fight that dazed feeling of being _sat in a school._

It was only after minutes of having mascara laden eyes boring into the side of his head that he finally turned round. "Can I help you?" he kept his voice soft- wary of the fact that he was at the moment treading on very thin ice. He'd hardly been at school at all, and when he was finally destined to come back he'd missed first period and arrived late for second. That- and he didn't quite know where he stood with his classmates at the moment.

The girl- he wasn't too sure he knew her name- smiled and seemed to do _something _with her lips that looked suspiciously like a pout. Luckily, she seemed to understand that talking would not be of his best interests and so quickly scrawled a note on some paper on her desk.

**My name's Regina- you probably forgot due to your 'illness'. XD But you don't look very ill to me xxx**

****Alex peered apprehensively at the note written in a splodge splattering black pen.

For a moment, catching her expectant look, his mind went blank- breaths snagged in the cavities of his frosted chest.

Conversations on ripped up pieces of paper? When was the last time he'd done that? What did he say? Was he meant to-? Why did she-? Quenching his near panic _(not panicking. Not panicking. I will _not _panic) _he slowly _(hesitantly he picked up the pen, and then back up at Ian. "What's this for?" the returning gaze was impatient but somehow the words were- were-) _picked up the pen and rested it against the paper. He had to _calm down._

**I wasn't ill this time- I went to America.**

****For a moment, he debated whether or not to insert a smiley face and x's like she had in her note. Was that common practice in the art of note passing? In the end, he decided not to _(smiley faces and America do _not _go well together) _and slid the paper discreetly across the desk to her, managing to look enraptured as Mr McKing turned after a brief discussion on the character Paris.

From the corner of his eye he watched as Regina read the note, taking in the tidy and loose writing and for some (scary) reason seeming to like what she saw. Uncapping her pen, much to Alex's chagrin, she wrote again.

**America! How cool! Ive always wanted to go there. But it's nice to have you back :D**

Smiling wanly at her, he took the offered pen.

**Thanks.**

Not to be put off by his blunt reply, she scrawled another question back.

**Sooo…you want to come to my party tomorrow?**

Coldness swept through him as he took in the words.

Party?

As in, with people?

Talking? _Dancing?_

_ Dangerous Alex. Dangerous._

**I don't know. What time is it on at?**

Smiling in victory; she 'accidentally' brushed hands with his as she went to retrieve the pen.

**Mm…whenever you want. I mean, it starts at 8pm, but it's gonna be on until late, so whenever you can come. Plz come!**

Alex stared at the words in confusion.

She wanted him to come?

Why?

Tense now, eyes sharp, he tried to settle his nerves. Was it a trap? Did she want something? Was

she one of _them?_

_Settle down, Alex, _something snapped at him- Reason. _She's just a kid. A teenager like you should've been. All she wants is for you to turn up at her party. That's all._

It was? He chanced a glance at her which she caught, gesturing to the paper.

Should he say yes?

_What would Wolf and Fox and Snake and Eagle say?_

_ Shut _up! He snarled savagely at the timid voice. They had no control _("you seem to forget that we control your every movement Alex. Your bank statement, your house, your housekeeper-") _over him! No one did!

_Oh yes they do! _Something giggled wicked at him until he forced it away with a panicked snarl and bare of his teeth.

Should he go?

_Go._

Alex twitched at the command in the voice.

_If you go, it means that you'll be able to leave the house. You don't have to _stay _at the party. Don't you see? This is the perfect opportunity to go back to your house (I don't want to go don't make me go don't make me-) and pick up where you left off. Go._

**Sure. Why not?**

Regina mentally pumped a fist, not realising that his assent was based on completely different reasons to what she thought.

* * *

As soon as the bell went for break, Tom twisted around in his seat and just stared at Alex.

Alex, in his school uniform.

It looked slightly out of place on him, hanging there awkwardly and uncomfortably as if it didn't know how quite to settle on the blond teenager's figure.

"Hey," Alex nodded, doing a good job of ignoring the girl next to him (Regina Baldwin. What a character) and smiling lightly at him.

Tom didn't bother with returning the greeting, cutting straight to the point with his usual bluntness. "You didn't tell me you were coming to school yesterday,"

Alex kept one eye on the leaving class and one eye on Tom. "No. I was only told after you'd gone. I didn't expect to be back so soon,"

Not too sure whether or not to be relaxed by the answer, Tom nodded once, sharply but managed to dredge up a smile, punching Alex lightly in the shoulder. "It's nice to see you back." And he _meant _it. He _did._

Tom flinched back from Alex's piercing (and so, so _knowing. _Alex _knew _just what he was feeling, didn't he?) gaze and dropped his eyes.

Alex gave a small laugh- except it _wasn't _a laugh. It sounded more like- more like…_not a laugh. _"You're the third person to say that," and for some reason, the statement sounded sad.

"Alex Rider, a word please. The rest, leave now," Mr McKing called, his voice a little tense and brittle.

Some teenagers who had attempted to hang around the classroom to hear what was going to be said muttered discontentedly and left, shooting glances at Alex every now and then.

Regina stood up grabbing her flashy bag and smiling flirtatiously at Alex. "See you tomorrow around 8ish, Alex!" then, giggling for no apparent reason, she pranced out of the door.

Tom watched her go, confusedness plain in the dip of his eyebrows and pull down of his lips. "Tomorrow?" he said mystified and then jumped as it hit him. Swivelling sharp eyes onto his friend (still friend, still friend) he narrowed them. "Wait, are you going to Regina's party too, tomorrow? You only just got back!" and he couldn't _keep _the upset note out of his voice though he tried to quench it down with a false cheery voice. But he couldn't _help _it! It had taken _ages _for him to get invited to parties like that- _ages _to finally _fit in! _And Alex just _waltzed _into school- _waltzed _right in and then he just got _invited _to parties. And he didn't even _care._

Alex watched as Tom seemed to have an inner struggle within himself.

Alex had heard the tone within Tom's voice.

Unlike Tom, he was much better at hiding the (hurt hurt hurt) tones in his own voice.

Shrugging lightly, he smiled, pretending not to notice the sound that was concealed so badly in rushed sheets of cardboard. "Yeah," he tried for a casual smile, attempting to lighten the mood although the smile felt unnatural on his face. "I'm not going for long though. I just need to use the party as an excuse to get out of the house,"

The words did not have the desired effect on Tom.

Quickly, very quickly, his expression twisted into one of betrayal and hurt- and _jealousy. _Then the expression slipped back into a casually friendly one- but Alex had seen it.

And Tom knew he had too.

The two boys met eyes.

"The teacher's waiting for you," Tom muttered, ducking his head to the left.

"Yeah," Alex tried to keep his voice light as he watched his (once) friend nod again once, and then stand up jerkily and leave him _behind. _Oh- he was being left _behind again._

"Any time today, Alex,"

But Alex could hardly muster up the strength to smile and look normal. He didn't care that Mr McKing looked nervous as he told him that he'd be having a meeting with his guardians and the head teacher after school.

Couldn't bring himself to care as he walked out of the classroom and found himself alone in the cafeteria.

He caught Tom's eye from across the room, but shook his head lightly at the half-hearted wave that Tom used to call him over- noticing the wary looks that his other friends were giving him.

And they used to be _his _friends too.

Dazedly, Alex watched kids chatter and laugh and walk past him, casting him curious looks.

This wasn't his _world._

He felt so out of place here. So _lost _here _("can you please tell me how to get home?...no? Well…OK, thank you anyway, sir," ad he was so _alone_) _and detached. He didn't want to _stay._

He wanted to go back home.

_Home._

Breath snatched in his throat.

He knew where home was.

Home was K-Unit.

_They _were home.

He wanted to go _home._

_ You're stronger than that, Alex. You don't need anyone._

But he _did. _He _did!_

_ Man up. You're pathetically weak. How are you going to fix _anything _with an attitude like that?_

So, he strengthened his posture, lifted his chin, and chose to pretend that those howls and cries did _not _issue from the shadow he was dragging around.

They didn't.

* * *

Snake pulled his tie tighter around his throat and peered into his mirror with an acute eye. Straightening out his black suit jacket, he shuffled backwards again to catch a clearer look at himself in the mirror. Finally, he nodded once, stiffly and turned to pull open the door to his bedroom.

One hand on the banister, he walked down the stairs, mentally preparing himself to meet Alex's head teacher- whose secretary had called that morning for a visit.

Frown tickling the bridge of his nose, he replayed the thought over in his mind again.

_Snake looked up at the sound of a phone ringing, and being the closest, was the first to reach it- although all four of them had dived towards the phone- a common occurrence in the K-Unit household._

_ Casting the disgruntled men a triumphant look as the slunk grumpily back into their chairs, Snake pressed the phone to his ear. "Hello?" glowering at Wolf who slammed a forefinger into his palm, mouthing and demanding Snake put the phone onto loudspeaker setting. Grudgingly, he obeyed and pressed the loudspeaker on._

_ "Oh, hello," the voice was soft, the voice of a young woman that held a chiming hint of surprise to it. "I'm sorry, have I phoned the wrong residence? I was calling on behalf of Brookland Comprehensive…"_

_ Swapping looks, Snake spoke into the receiver that lay on the table. "Is this for Alex?"_

_ There was a slight pause, and then the woman spoke up again. "Yes, it is. Is there a Jack Starbright in at the moment?"_

_ Snake frowned at the phone, lips mouthing the name to the rest of his confused companions._

_ Jack Starbright?_

_ "No, I'm afraid not," he said smoothly._

_ Another hesitant pause. "Do you know where she is? I need to speak to Alex's guardian,"_

_ This was getting more and more baffling. "Yes, that would be me," he ignored Eagle and Fox who desperately mouthed "us" at him, waving their arms about until Wolf leant over and dealt them both a heavy thump with one clenched fist._

_ "Oh," the voice sounded flustered. "But we have Jack Starbright registered down as his guardian…" the voice trailed off._

_ "Yes," Snake continued, eyes sharp. "Well, Alex has been moved into our care now. Who is this 'Jack Starbright'?"_

_ Relief suddenly entered the female's voice- a topic she could obviously deal with. "Alex's former guardian- before his uncle, of course. An American lady? Used to be his housekeeper? She apparently is still in the country, but if you say you're Alex's guardians…"_

_ "We are," Snake said firmly, the words 'uncle' and 'former guardian' clashing about messily in his head, dragging up the face of a confused Tom Harris. Struggling to keep his voice as friendly and easy going as he could, he prompted her. "Is there a reason you needed her?"_

_ "Oh no! Not her especially! I just need Alex's guardian- that would be you I suppose Mr…"_

_ "Murray. Corey Murray," he said pleasantly._

_ "Ah, very well, Mr Murray. If you could come in today to meet Alex at 3pm, you would be directed to have a meeting with him and the headteacher,"_

_ "All of us?" Eagle said- loud enough to be heard._

_ "Yeah, I mean, it's not just Corey looking after him- we all do," Wolf interrupted._

_ "That's true," Fox nodded; ignoring Snake who hissed at them to shut up._

_ The silence stretched over the phone until a slightly squeaky voice spoke up again. "You are…all Alex's guardians?"_

_ "Yes," Wolf grunted, nodding once._

_ "Oh," the voice sounded completely lost, now. Snake could sense the desperation to get off of the phone in her voice. "Well…Mr Murray," Snake grinned at the looks his comrades shot him. "Thank you for your time,"_

_ Before Snake could ask what the meeting was for, she had already hung up, the tone dial ringing mournfully throughout the room._

_ "Cub had a 'former guardian'?" when Fox spoke up, his voice was troubled, eyes scanning the carpet beneath him as if for clues._

_ "I thought Mrs Jones said that he had parents?" Eagle muttered, eyes looking stony in bewildered anger._

_ "Yeah? Well, we've all seen how well _they _do in the trust department," Wolf snorted darkly, fingers drumming an angry beat into the armrest of the sofa. He tugged his lips down into an irritated frown, speaking in a low mutter. "Three weeks my-"_

_ "That doesn't explain why we've never been told anything about this," Eagle interrupted, waving one frustrated hand at them all. "Isn't that information that we should be privy to?"_

_ Snake shook his head, dragging one hand through his pale blond hair and leaving it to rest there, nestled within the soft strands. "We don't know anything," he said softly, looking up at them. "What information have we _ever _had given to us about Alex?"_

_ That made them stop and think._

_ "It's a test,"_

_ They turned to look at Fox who sat still, his certain voice capturing their attention._

_ "What do you mean?"_

_ "It's a test," he repeated, still sitting still, his voice calm but tinged with something close to anger. "Remember what Blunt said? He wanted us to gain Alex's trust. He's testing us to see how much we can find out about him."_

_ "And then feed it back to them," it wasn't a question that swept gustily out of Eagle's mouth._

_ "Yeah, just like that."_

Sighing, Snake pushed open the door and then stopped dead.

"_What _do you think _you're _doing?" he spat, eyes wide and hand rested on the doorhandle.

Eagle glowered at him, arms crossed and a defiant look playing hard in his eye. He stood straight and raised his chin as Snake took in his suited attire. "The question should be, _Snake: _What are _you _doing?"

Snake sucked in a harsh breath. "_I _am going to Alex's meeting as _I _am his guardian,"

"Oh yeah?" Eagle challenged.

"Oh yeah." Snake took the challenge head on.

"Guys! Has anyone seen my-" Fox careered to a stop and stared at them all. "Why are you both in suits?"

"Why are _you _in a suit?" Snake snapped, throwing his arms up.

Fox frowned at him, moving a little further into the room. "I thought that was obvious," he said slowly, frown still in place. "I'm Cub's guardian. There's a meeting I have to go to,"

"_Who's _Cub's guardian?" Wolf demanded, striding into the living room. As he took in his suited teammates, his eyes narrowed. "What's this?" he barked. "Where do you think you're all going?"

"Cub's meeting," came the sharp replies.

They glowered at one another.

"We'll see about that," Fox growled.

* * *

Miss Bedfordshire was flustered to say the least.

Talking on the phone to that attractive Scottish voice had been nice at first- it was nice to get

someone who was not immediately sharp with you or asked long and needless questions. But then, she had remembered that Jack Starbright was indeed Alex's true guardian, and had to change the records if this indeed had changed for some reason. What she had not expected were multiple voices over the phone claiming to be Alex's legal guardians.

And she definitely had _not _expected this.

She tried to speak over the noise of the four strong looking men in suits who spoke loudly and pressed to all crush over her desk. Her hand twitched towards the button that would call for help if she needed it, pressing back into her chair with a frightened grimace as one of the men took to physically hitting another man on the top of his head to get his point across.

And worse.

Teenagers were _staring _at them.

"If you could just-" her voice was cut off as one of the men, a tall man with a startlingly

charming smile leant over to her. "Hey. I'm really sorry about this- I don't know quite what happened."

Taken in by his attractive smile and general friendliness, she reached out to take the hand that

was offered to her, and shook the surprisingly gentle handshake (he was holding back- a fact that made

her blush).

"Is Alex here? It would be great if-"

"OY! Eagle! No cheating!" came a loud voice from the one who had been recently bashing

another man's head in. He swivelled his grey eyes onto her, and his lips twitched into a smile, shoving

the (odd name, really) man he'd just called 'Eagle' out of the way and replacing his hand with his own. "Pleasure to meet you. I'm Alex's guardian, Roman-"

"This is ridiculous," another face popped into view, blue eyes rolling. "How on earth could _this _brute be Alex's guardian? The name's Ben. Now, if you could just direct me to where-"

"What on earth is going on?"

The quiet voice somehow had the ability to break through the increasing noise.

"Oh! Alex!" Mrs Bedfordshire near sobbed in relief.

Alex gazed, stupefied at the sight of K-Unit all squabbling in suits and causing general chaos in _his _reception.

At school.

He had the odd feeling to not-laugh.

"Ah, Alex," Eagle straightened out his tie casually and beckoned him over with a sweep of his hand. "I was just wondering where you were," smiling, he reached out for Alex's hair again to ruffle it, noticing the way Alex tensed at the gesture this time. Choosing to not voice this insight, he carried on blithely. "Come on, your head teacher must be-"

"Why are you all here?" Alex cut in.

K-Unit stared at him.

The kid had an odd look about him. Detached, dazed, his eyes carrying that ghostly transparency that they had when they'd first seen him. That, and the way he held himself was defensive, his hands never staying still.

"The meeting, Alex," Miss Bedfordshire explained quickly. "Now, if you could just say which one of these men is your guardian…"

"All of them," was the blank reply.

Miss Bedfordshire blanched, glancing at the four men. "All of them?"

Listless eyes swivelled onto her, a feverish…something tossing and turning through those depths. "Yes. Now, come on. You're late. Again," the accusation was dead- devoid of any feeling. Glancing at them once more, he turned on his heel and left, K-Unit hastily following behind him.

"Alex, hey, Cub!" Snake caught up to him and placed a hand on the teen's shoulder, pulling back hastily when Cub tensed under the movement. "Are you OK?" the other members of K-Unit watched on worriedly.

"We're here," was the dismissive reply.

Alex knocked once; not waiting to be called in before he strode into the room.

Mr Bray looked up with a disapproving eye, ready to chide the newcomer before the breath left his chest.

Four undoubtedly muscular men stood in his office, arms crossed and wearing identical looks that did _not _look happy.

He did a quick addition in his head.

Muscular men + suits + Alex Rider = trouble.

Swallowing, forcing a smile onto his suddenly worming and squirming lips, he tipped a hand that he hoped _did not _shake to indicate some empty seats. "Please," he nearly choked on the words, hoping that he wasn't unknowingly signing his death warrant. "Take a seat,"

They did, stiffly, and Mr Bray was pleased to notice that their expressions had lessened somewhat in intensity as they looked at him to begin.

Clearing his throat and calming his hammering heart (they could hear it- couldn't they?) he dredged up another weak smile. "Alex's…guardian's, I presume?" oh _why _couldn't Alex have

something _normal _for once?

Alex cut in before they could open their mouths and argue the point. "Yes,"

Mr Bray licked his dry lips nervously as he glanced at the dead eyed teen. "Very well. Well, this meeting is about Alex," he took a deep breath. _Do not anger muscly men in suits. Do not anger muscly men in suits…_ "Alex and his long period away from school,"

If nothing else had gained their attention, this had.

Rolling a pencil under his fingertips in agitation, he nodded. "Yes, Alex, as I'm sure you're well aware has a long medical history of…illnesses." He paused, contemplating his next words. "Which, I hope you'll forgive me, are simply unacceptable,"

"Illnesses?" Snake asked, baffled, glancing at Alex who promptly ignored his look in favour of staring at the desk top.

"Yes," he flinched as they turned to look at him again. "We've had long flu's, appendicitis…plenty of other illnesses due to his weak immune system. Sorry." He said quickly after receiving a sharp look after his sarcasm in the words. Beginning again, he tried to get comfortable. "We've had a chat with the school governors Alex, and we've come to a decision," he leant forward to face Alex, eyes stern. "One more absence or one more slip up in behaviour- and we'll have to indefinitely expel you," he pulled back. "We can't keep up with your constant on and off appearances, Alex. This is a school- not a playground,"

Mr Bray moved to carry on, but his eyes sharpened as he caught sight of Alex not even _paying attention, _his attention diverted onto a loose bit of thread on his clothes. "Alex!" he snapped.

The boy jerked up as if he had been shot, eyes suddenly alight before recognition flooded into them, and the light dimmed somewhat. "I'm listening." but the voice that said the words did not hold any intonation that suggested that even _Alex _agreed with himself.

Tightening his lips into one thin and straight line, Mr Bray clasped his hands on the desk in front of him. "You don't seem to understand the severity of the situation, Alex."

"Of course I do," the boy retorted, eyes not wholly there. "If I don't stop having absences then-"

"He'll get expelled," the darker one near the door finished, his eyebrows pulled down low on his forehead. Turning his head to Alex, he frowned. "You never told me you got ill so much, Alex,"

The question in the statement was only audible to Alex and the other members of K-Unit, who turned to look at Alex with the same query shining in their eyes.

"No," Mr Bray pulled back, surprised at the look that suddenly washed over the teenager's face. He looked tired. World weary. Uncomfortably, Mr Bray wondered over whether the death of his uncle really _had _affected him that much. "I suppose I didn't."

Mr Bray cleared his throat after the brief lull of silence that followed, and reluctantly turned to face Alex's...guardians. "It seems to me that you don't know much about Alex," noting the scowls that this deduction caused, he hastily made amends. "Not that that's a problem- you are new, after all. But, perhaps it would be good if you could get in contact with Alex's old guardian, Jack Starbright," Mr Bray pretended not to notice how suddenly Alex's eyes snapped onto him. Swallowing, wondering what was _wrong _with this meeting, he carried on. "Unless you already _have _spoken to her?"

"No," Corey Murray said slowly, watching him with surprisingly sharp lilac eyes. "But that would be great,"

Smiling in relief, he reached down to the drawer of his desk. "I think that would be quite helpful, don't you, Alex?" he turned towards the boy, hoping to lessen the heavy atmosphere after the threat he had to let loose into the air.

But Alex's face was hard and cold, his eyes sharp. "No," the boy cut in almost brutally, his fists clencehed on his lap. "I _don't _think that would be a good idea,"

The words were vicious, like knives thrown right towards Mr Bray. The head teacher licked his dry lips once again, trying to reign in the fear that conversing with this boy always seemed to bring along. "It was merely a suggestion," he spoke quickly, hurriedly, and then winced when he realised thatit sounded like he was _bowing _to this boy's comments. Straightening himself up and attempting to harden his gaze, he glared at the teenager's. "I don't think, at the moment that you are in any position to be using a tone like that with me, _boy,"_

Alex stared up at Mr Bray.

And suddenly, he was very forcefully reminded of Mr Blunt. The muse dragged an odd laugh from his chest before he could stop it, and he quickly snapped his mouth shut and looked away, struggling to keep his mouth from squirming up, up, _up, _into that distracting and cruel mockery of a smile. He was tired, worn out, and he hadn't had a good day. He wanted to go _home._

"I think we'd better be getting back," Snake's soft voice cut through his tangly mess of thoughts, and Alex nearly jumped as a comforting hand was placed on his shoulder- Snake.

"Yes, yes, well, please do take up my advice and see Miss Starbright," he peered over his glasses at them, trying to mask how pleased he was to see them go (the _weird _family) through the fussy shuffling of papers on his desk. "Be good Alex, and remember my warning,"

The teen made no sound to show whether or not he acknowledged the head teacher's comment, but instead trailed listlessly after the leaving men, allowing the door to shut with a quiet whoosh of air behind him.

Exhaling, Mr Bray slid his glasses off and massaged the bridge of his nose. How _glad _he was to see _them _go.

_Jack Starbright. _Wolf glanced sharply down at the quiet teenager following them to the car, the teen's brown eyes fixed on a loose thread attached to his sleeve, fingers pulling at it loosely- as if he didn't want to break it lest he lose his form of entertainment. Moving his eyes away from the enigmatic teenager, he let his eyes train on the ground on which he was walking, the waxed floor stained with chewing gum every now and then- some old and others new.

Just when they thought that they already had enough mysteries, another one turned it's teasing bronze head towards them. It seemed that Alex was just _full _of them.

But who was this woman (or man, the name hinted towards either)? Whenever her name popped up, it was met by such a confusing variety of reactions that Wolf couldn't for the _life of him _decide whether the person was someone who was good, bad or ugly (ha.). And, if she was indeed Alex's housekeeper-slash-guardian, then where was she now? Turning his mind back to last night, Wolf turned a corner towards the exit of the school. Cub's friend Tom had mentioned her briefly. When they mentioned that _they _were Alex's guardian's now, he had looked shocked, even scared. But then Cub had calmly told Tom that she was back at home...or the old residence where Alex used to live.

Snorting, pulling out the car keys (his turn to drive, much to the irritation of the others), he decided that they would just have to do a friendly...family call to go and see this woman at some point- sooner rather than later.

But that brought up another mystifying question:

Where were Cub's parents?

As they all got settled in the car, Cub sat in the middle this time, Fox asked a question what they all wanted to know. "Good day at school?"

The question seemed to stun Cub for a moment or two, and he stood staring almost tragically down at the loose bit of thread that he had pulled out off in his surpirse.

_Good day at school._

What a question to ask.

Did it _look _like he'd had a good day at school?

_Just tell them an answer that they want to hear and be done with it, _a voice snapped dismissively. But, for some reason, Alex found himslelf once _again _going against the whispery voice in his head. Going _against _it because- let's face it. Alex Rider dug his nails into his palms. _No one _would own him _("I own you, Rider! Now stop with this meaningless rebellion! Do you-"), no one. _Not even little voices in his head that screamed and shouted words that he didn't want to hear, didn't want to-

"Not really,"

The honesty from Cub was shocking to say the least.

They had expected to do a little more wheedling to get a _closer _to honest answer from Alex. But this...this straightforwardness was good. It was something that they could work with.

Smiling softly, Ben nodded. "OK, well. It's over now. Let's go home,"

_Let's go home._

"Yes," and the smile that finally fell upon Alex's face was so soft, so shy that Alex couldn't pull it down even if he wanted to. _(Why was he acting so childish? Why was he- Danger! Danger! Following this course of action will inevitably lead to- ) _He ducked his head, hair covering his eyes. "Let's go home."

K-Unit settled back into their car seats, grinning happily-

All blissfully unaware that it would be the next day when things would start to go horribly wrong.

Terribly wrong.

* * *

Tom unlocked the door to his house, yelling out to his brother who stood in the kitchen, whipping up some type of food- half of it already smeared across the worksurface and his face. Tom rolled his eyes as he locked the door and grunted in reply to Jerry's cheerful reply. His older brother always did say that the only way to create great food was to make a mess. Tom still was trying to figure out whether it wsa possible to get food all over the windows in an accident.

"What's up?" Jerry peered around the door frame, licking a bit of cake batter from his cheek as he curiously watched his younger brother throw his coat on the stairs in an uncharacteristic display of frustration.

Tom wondered whether or not to answer the question. In the end, faced by Jerry's serious look, he caved in. "It's just...Alex was back today,"

"That's great!" Jerry said enthusiastically. "I mean, like, you and him are cool, right?"

"Right," Tom said lamely.

"Or not," Jerry replied.

Looking down at his feet clad in Donald Duck socks (a present from Jerry), he tried not to scowl, guilt eating away at him. "We didn't really...talk," his voice was quiet.

Jerry watched him for a moment or two. "Mm," he murmured, eyebrow raised. "Why's that? You fall out or something?"

"Well...I don't really know," seeing Jerry's confused expression, he scrambled for the right words. "I mean, it's not like we had an argument, it was just," he shrugged helplessly. "In the air, you know,"

"Ah," Jerry replied.

"And now I feel bad because it's kind of my fault and he can't help it but whenever I went up to try and talk to him he just had this weird air around him and I _couldn't _do it!" he burst out, panting for breath at the end of his rushed explanation. "He's _changed!"_

Jerry nodded, tapping the spoon against his chin, splattering even more cake batter around. "Well, that' s a bit dumb, right, Tom?" he carried on even as Tom made to retort with something else. "If you make a mistake, you apologise about it, and then you work to sort out the problem- I thought you would've learned that from the bad example of Mum and Dad," it was said neutrally, but Tom still felt the blow of the words.

"Yeah," he swallowed, digging his hands into his pockets. "You're right." he made a move to say more when the doorbell suddenly rang.

Exchanging looks, Jerry raising his eyebrows at his own cake stained appearance, Tom sighed and went to answer the door himself.

"Hello...?" Tom's voice trailed off as his eyes caught something on the floor.

"Who is it?" Jerry pushed his way to stand cramped next to Tom in the doorway, peering out across the empty corridor confusedly and ignoring Tom who complained as Jerry smeared cake batter on him.

"No one," Tom grumbled, as Jerry moved and the spoon in his hand pulled the mixture all the way down his jacket. "Hey!"

"Odd," Jerry looked down at what Tom had been looking at too. "Hm, more Begonia's."

Tom gave him an odd look. "Are you sure that woman doesn't fancy you?"

Jerry gave him a superior look- which didn't quite work with blue icing somehow on his nose (did he stir things with his _face _or something?). Pursing his lips, Jerry sighed. "You'll understand the machinations of ladies when you're older, kid,"

"Whatever," he snorted, stooping down to pick up the flowers. "There are 26 of them, this time," his eyes quickly summed up.

"Congratulations, you can count,"

"Ha, ha, ha." Tom said sarcastically, picking up the flowers. "Well, aren't you clever?"

Jerry made to make a comeback when something dropped out of the flowers.

They both froze, eyes locked on the thing on the floor.

A dead blackbird lay still on the ground, a note attached to the leg of the poor animal, it's feathers still glossy and sleek.

Tom's eyes picked out the pink card and read the message that was scrawled in a fun looking print on the gruesome package.

**_When down came a blackbird,_**

**_ And pecked off her nose!_**

Jerry took one step back, tugging his little brother away from the dead bird that lay suddenly dangerously on the floor. "I think it's time you made up with Alex," he said quietly but nervously.

Tom nodded, his mouth dry. "Yeah, you're probably right."

* * *

**AN- HERE YOU ARE! Sorry about there not being much action (well...none, really) in this chapter, but EVERYTHING STARTS NEXT CHAPTER!**

**And, for those of you who are tearing out your hair about ****_still _****not having learned about ****_just_**** what happened in the USA, wonder for ****_just _****a little more! The secrets shall unfurl slightly in the next chapter, and the big reveal is for Chapter 10! Just hold on!**

**And now, my pretties! The moment you've allll been waiting for!**

**(Drum roll, please)**

**My new Alex Rider fiction!**

**...Which doesn't yet have a name!**

***tumbleweed rolls past and smacks me in the face***

**Well, considering you've all been such lovely reviewers, I have decided to not ONLY tell you what it's about, but ALSO give you a brief teaser into the story (don't be surprised if you never see thiese paragraphs in the real thing- things happen sometimes *wink wink*) so HERE WE GO!**

**Hiding secrets has always been one of Alex's strengths- push the whispers into places that no one would ever think to look. But this time, perhaps this secret is too big to hide. Cast into the glittery world of showbiz for a new mission, will it be too hard to hide his secret amongst the flashing lights and ever curious K-Unit?**

**After all- it's not a secret easily hidden.**

**They do say that lies start with the eyes.**

* * *

**PROLOGUE-**

Alex opened his eyes.

The sound of a thumping clock reverberated uncomfortably through the thick silence of the house- like stifled breathing in an airless room.

Sighing, pushing himself out of bed, Alex shuffled towards the door of his room and swung it open, muttering as he stubbed his toe on the side in his drowsiness.

Heading towards the bathroom, Alex didn't withhold a sigh of bliss as warm water ran smoothly down his back and shoulder- allowing him to relax for once without the fear of some sort of attack.

_Although I'm sure some assassins wouldn't have any qualms at barging in and shooting me whilst I'm showering, _he mused.

His body stiffened.

Well, that just put a dampener on his enjoyment.

Sighing once again (it was obviously becoming a habit), he turned to shower off and dried himself off before stepping into his clothes, pausing to push a hand through his hair before exiting the bathroom to head downstairs and get some breakfast.

Humming some vague song,Alex pushed some bread in the toaster and leaned against the work surface until he heard it pop, collecting it, cursing as it burnt his hands, and successfully dropping it on the floor.

"Damn!" the shout was unexpected even to him and he clapped his mouth shut, eyes wide and heart pounding.

Silence crouched low and watched him with savage eyes.

Calming his thundering heartbeat and silently reprimanding the fear that shot through him, he tried to calm down. It was _OK, _he decided, though the shaking in his hands didn't seem to agree with him. _It's OK, Alex, you just surprised yourself, OK? _But he couldn't seem to fully calm down as he tried starting up his mindless humming (except it wasn't mindless anymore) again, deciding to abandon his toast to the predator of the floor and trail into the living room, still humming softly under his breath.

"TV. TV always helps to calm people down," he murmured, trying to ignore the fact that he spoke in barely a whisper, stubbornly attributing it to the fact that he didn't usually talk to himself, and so was just sparing himself the personal embarrassment.

Wandering to the television, he leaned over and pressed on, jerking back as noise blared into the room- having been left on loud.

The noise was blaring and cut through the silence of the house in obnoxious and frightening clarity. Scrambling for the remote and cursing under his breath, Alex desperately tried to find it within the cracks between the sofa. Tears almost sprung to his eyes as the noise continued to shout over the silence. Almost hunching down, Alex finally found the remote and with clumsy fingers, one hand pressed over his ear, he managed to turn the sound onto mute.

And suddenly now the Silence was deafening.

Gasping out breaths, Alex decided that he couldn't take it anymore and ran out of the room, grabbing up his jacket and keys, unlocking the door, and diving out before Silence could claim him.

_This is better, _he decided as he hopped down the steps of his house, hands burrowed securely in his pockets. _No more quiet. That's good._

Outside _always _had a sound. Whether it was the sound of cars on the street, birds singing lustily up to the heavens or wind passing apologetically through trees, bushes and grass; there was always some little orchestra playing here or there.

It was relaxing.

Alex found himself sitting on a bench (no need to hum here) and wishing that he had eaten the toast, grumbling as he realised that when he got back, he was going to have to clean up the mess he had made on the kitchen floor.

Briefly, Alex allowed himself to close his eyes and forget about the screams of memories that clawed for _outoutout _in his head, letting the calmness of outdoors was over him. This was _nice. _No running from bullets or making up lies here.

Just him; the trees, the bench and-

_Ring! Ring! Ring!_

He peeled one eye open.

Of course.

He was _always _interrupted _just _when he was enjoying himself.

With a less than gracious look on his face, he tugged out the phone from his trouser pockets and snapped it open. "Yes?" he demanded.

"Alex Rider, it has come to our attention that-"

"Yeah, yeah," he muttered, cutting the sweet voice off. Then, speaking louder, he tipped his head to the sky, staring wistfully up at it. "I'll be there in ten,"

"We'll send a car," came the automatic response.

"No, I'll-" Alex cut himself off, hesitating. "OK," he grumbled. "Fine," might as well sit and enjoy it where he could.

"A car will arrive to your location shortly."

Alex didn't even bother asking how they knew where he was, and just hung up, stuffing the phone back into his pocket and closing his eyes again. Well, there went goodbye to his relaxing day of nothingness.

Perfect.

The car _did _indeed arrive 'shortly'- which was a disappointment to Alex who was just enjoying the not-quite-silence of the area around him when he heard the sound of a car engine. Alex sat up as the sound of footsteps approached him and a man stood in front of him.

"Alex Rider?" the deep voice was somewhat threatening in it's lowness.

Alex pulled back, stammering. "N-no! Who are you? W-what do you want?" he drew his arms protectively up to his chest.

The man paused. "Sorry, son. Forget you ever saw me,"

Alex dropped the act, rolling his eyes and letting his posture drop back into that of himself. "It was a _joke. _You sounded like you needed a bit of laughter in your life, right?" he grinned up at the man.

The man, or Agent did not seem impressed at all. "You're wasting time. Follow me,"

Alex's eyes lost their cheer and his countenance suddenly went cold. "Badge," he barked out, thrusting a hand forward.

He closed his hand as the Agent dropped the badge into his open hand. Glaring suspiciously at the item and flipping it over, Alex twisted it upside down and around, tapping at the badge and "hmm"ing in a critical way. Finally done, he handed it back to the exasperated Agent, nodding sharply and standing up. "You'll do," he clapped his hands. "Well then? Let's go!"

Growling lowly, a little insulted now at haven been given this job, he turned sharply on one heel and led the teen to the car.

The journey was uneventful- a little boring as the Agent had clammed up and only spoke to snap at Alex to "shut up" in which Alex had retorted with a muttered "touchy", almost _hearing _the tightness of the Agent's fists around the steering wheel.

Finally, they arrived, and Alex hopped out of the car, waving wildly as the Agent gratefully sped away, calling after him to "not forget me!"

It would only be later that the Agent would find a piece of paper with 'Alex' written on it in swirly letters coupled with his number and a 'Call me' followed by a winky face.

Needless to say, that bit of paper ended up in his fire the following second.

Jogging up the stairs and into the building, Alex ignored the people milling about inside, and carefully stepped up towards the lift, waiting to hear it ping before near diving inside and pressing the right button towards the floor that he needed.

Whistling softly to himself, Alex twitched as he heard the door ping and then hesitantly exited, treading towards the right door and counting softly and needlessly under his breath.

Reaching the right door, he knocked once and entered.

"I would appreciate it if you waited to be called in before entering," the cool voice of Mr Blunt flowed into his ears.

Alex feigned a distressed expression. "Sorry about that! I just, you know, love being in here so much that I just sometimes _forget. _This _is, _after all, like the home I've never wanted," so saying, he flopped into the chair in front of the desk and glared at the person behind it.

"That's nice to hear," was the dry reply. "But you haven't been called here to banter." a pause, a shuffling of papers on the desk. Suspiciously, Alex's eyes followed the movement. "You've been called here for a new mission,"

Alex's eyes widened. "Are you being serious?" he near shrieked. "But I only came here because I thought you'd arranged to have a teddy bear picnic with me!" he dragged one shaking hand down his face. "This is terrible! I made up Belinda Bear _specifically _because I thought that's what we were going to do!"

"Enough!" Blunt snapped, silencing Alex. "This is an important mission that you _will _accept, Alex,"

Alex sobered.

"Good." Mr Blunt got down to business. "Now, here's the-"

Alex jumped as the door slammed open, turning to stare at the person who had just flung themselves into the office.

"Blunt. _What _are you doing?" the voice belonged to Mrs Jones- and she didn't sound pleased.

"I am merely discussing with Alex what his next mission will be,"

Alex winced at the sharp intake of breath. "Blunt," she hissed, striding over to his side. "I thought we'd _talked _about this!"

"And we had," he cut in smoothly. "I just made up my mind,"

"And?" the question was tense, Alex found himself holding his breath along with Mrs Jones.

"And he is too good to lose," Mr Blunt finished easily.

"Alan!" Mrs Jones near-slammed her hand on the desk. "We can't-"

"We have, Tulip," Mr Blunt interrupted coldly. "We have already used him, and he has proved his worth,"

"But can't you _see? _This is too far! Using him before was a little-"

"Can I speak?" Alex complained, rubbing his hand against the leather of the chair.

"No," Mrs Jones snapped before turning back to Alan Blunt, ignoring Alex who grumbled about people needing to loosen up nowadays. "This is too far, Blunt! We can't do this anymore!"

"Why not?"

The question seemed to make Mrs Jones freeze.

Alex looked up.

Mr Blunt repeated the question slowly, burningly. "Why not, Mrs Jones?"

Audibly, she swallowed, glancing down at the teen who was staring at her. "Because..."

"Because?"

Alex gritted his teeth, glaring at the woman, daring her to say it, to say it, to say-

"Because he's blind!" she burst out finally, her voice loud and awkward in the tense room. She dragged a hand down her face, twisting her head the other way. "He's _blind, _Alan."

Alex closed his sightless eyes.

How he hated that word.

_Blind._

And when Mr Blunt next spoke, his voice was cold, ice.

"Your point, Mrs Jones?"

* * *

**AN- There's your present! A snapshot of what's to come! Like it? Now, you know what I want! :D If you've any questions you'd like answering, just give me a bell!**

**Over and out!**


	9. Chapter 9

**AN- Have you read Nanaille's ****_Cutting Ties? _****It's great! You should read it! Oh! And sorry for the wait- I know it's been quite a while! I hope the length of the chapters makes up for it!**

* * *

Spitting out blood, Alex glared hazily at his captors, twisting his hands that were tied harshly behind his back.

They weren't taking any chances this time.

Alex gasped and tried to double over as a fist slammed into his stomach, but the movement was disallowed as a heavy hand grabbed him by the hair, screwing it in one violent hand and wrenching his head up.

Struggling to suck in a breath properly, Alex tried to keep his tiring gaze baleful as he fixed it on the burning eyes that stared back.

"I think I've got a good idea on how to get rid of _you, _kid," the man hissed, where Alex could hear others laughing in the background.

Groaning as his hair was pulled once again, Alex blurrily cast his mind back to just how he managed to get in this position…

"Ben?"

Ben Daniels turned at the sound of the soft voice, and smiled gently at Alex who gazed back, the teens brow crumpled for some reason. Placing down the book he was reading, Ben called Alex over. "You OK, Al?"

Vaguely, the teenager nodded, coming to a stop next to Fox's chair and staring at the book on his knee that the Agent had been reading. "I was wondering whether I could go out tonight," the question was barely a murmur.

Fox sat up, his eyes forcing Alex to look at them. Knowingly, Fox smiled slowly. "Eagle and Snake said no?"

From the tightening of the teens lips and the embarrassed colour that tinted his cheeks, Fox assumed that he'd guessed right.

Grinning now, Fox leaned his head into one hand, still watching Alex. "And what did they say?"

"It was a stupid reason," Alex retaliated stiffly. "I'm not going to be alone," _well, not _all _the time, anyway…_

"That's not what I asked," Fox said in a holier-than-thou tone- purposefully aggravating him, he knew it.

Clenching his jaw, he forced himself to remain calm. He'd done _well _asking them and not just leaving. He _could _have just left as, he did, after all, make his own decisions in life. Tilting his chin upwards, he opened his mouth to speak. "Snake said that it's not safe, and Eagle said that if you guys can't come, then there's no way." He dropped his eyes onto Fox. "But that's _stupid. _I _told _them that but Snake slapped me over the head and Eagle just told me to stop whining," the _indignity _of it all!

Fox had to stifle a laugh at that; the look on Alex's face did not look like it would appreciate any form of being teased at the moment. Nodding solemnly, keeping his face as serious as it would go, he tapped one finger against his chin. "And where would you be going out to?"

"A party," was the brisk reply.

"Adult supervision?" Fox reeled off immediately.

"No,"

Fox picked the book up again. "Then no,"

Alex stared at Fox. "No? Why not?" and his voice _didn't _go higher- it didn't.

"Because," Fox said, not even _bothering _to put down the book as he spoke- "You're meant to be protected by _us, _Alex. And if you're going to a party where there are no adults and just a bunch of children-"

"I'm not a child!" Alex insisted.

"-then do you really think if any danger struck that they'd be able to act concisely and quickly?" Fox carried on as if Alex hadn't even spoken, turning a page with a movement of his fingers. "And will there be alcohol?"

_Would there be alcohol?_

_ Risk of alcoholic beverages- 87% (no parents in, many teenagers- high risk percentage)_

_ You could just lie, _something silky whispered.

But, upon catching the eye of Ben, Alex found that the normally easy lie wouldn't slip out. Frustrated, he turned his head to the side, closing his mouth with an irate snap.

Ben nodded slowly, his eyes dropping leisurely back down to the page he was on. "Then that's a definite no,"

"But I won't drink anything- I promise!" _why are you wagering with him? _The voice was back, slapping him harshly. _Just leave later tonight when they least expect it! This could be your only chance to go and have a look around for clues!_

_ And that's _exactly _why he has to ask for permission, you idiot! _Reason hissed. _Can't you see? If he gets permission, then he can snoop, (I hate that word) come back, and then none of them would be any the wiser!_

"You can't promise things like that, Alex." Ben sighed, mournfully putting down his book. "Things happen, people pressure you into-"

_"No one _will pressure me into doing _anything,"_

Ben paused at the frozenness of the voice, catching that familiar deadness in Alex's eyes again. Carefully, like stepping over stones, he began again. "OK, Alex, but you can't _promise _that. Sometimes things happen without you fully _wanting _them to,"

But Alex didn't seem to be listening; staring off into the distance, eyes like frosted glass.

"Alex,"

His head snapped round to face him, eyes dropping there glossy sheen.

"I'm sorry, but the answer's no,"

Alex stared at him. Then words- stupid, _irrational _words- bubbled out of him without his consent.

"You don't trust me."

Ben's head jerked up at the soft accusation.

Alex stared down at the carpet under his feet, his jaw clenched and fingers pulling at the bottom of his long sleeved shirt. "You don't trust me," he repeated again.

Leaning forward, Ben caught hold of the wrist that owned the hand that was pulling viciously at the material of his top. Tugging he wrist away from the material, he kept hold of it in one firm hand. "This isn't a matter of trust, Cub," he said seriously. "This is a matter of- look at me," he commanded. "Alex, look at me,"

Stubbornly, the teen kept his head twisted to the side, and only looked at Ben when the mans hand held his chin and forced it to him, not letting go lest Alex turn away again.

"Of _course _I trust you," Ben realised that his voice was gentle, gentler than it usually was when dealing with anybody. It just showed how much he cared about this mulish kid. "But I don't trust _others. _And I'd much rather keep you here and irritated then out there and in danger,"

Alex eyes seemed to examine his for a moment, and Ben felt a slight flash of hope that maybe Alex _understood _why- "What if I gave you a time to come for me?"

Ben dropped Cub's chin.

Maybe not.

"_I'm _saying no. But if you ask Wolf, maybe you'll have a chance- he is the leader, after all," Ben picked up his book again, determined to go back to reading.

"Ask me what?"

Alex didn't even flinch at the 'abruptness' of Wolf's entry into the sitting room, having heard him striding down the stairs not too long ago.

Ben glanced up and then back down to his page. "Cub wants to go to a party," he explained distractedly.

"Yeah?" the dark man fixed Alex with a look. "What time?"

"Starts at eight." Alex answered promptly.

"Adult supervision?"

He paused in frustration. "Well, no, but-"

"Then no."

"But that's not fair!" _("Nothing's fair, Alex. If you can't get such a simple truth as that into your head then you might as well-") _And it _wasn't _fair! It _wasn't!_

"Cub," Wolf moved past the glaring teenager to sit down. "I don't believe _you _want to go and _party. _Something doesn't quite add up with that thought."

And for some reason, that hurt.

Even though it was the truth _("The truth hurts, Alex, more than you'd like to believe." But he didn't _want _to believe it! It wasn't true! It couldn't be true! "It _is _the truth, Alex. Every last decaying bit of it is-"), _it _hurt. _He sucked in a glassy breath, drawing himself up straighter, his jaw tensing once again- a tiny gesture of his hurt.

They wouldn't notice.

They didn't _know _him.

No one-

"Are you OK, Cub?"

Alex stared at Wolf and Fox who watched him; Fox with the book placed down on his knee, leaning out of the chair, Wolf with both hands on the armrest, ready to push himself up if needed.

And they _knew._

They _knew _that he was hurt.

And Alex couldn't decide if that was a bad thing or a good thing.

"I just want to go," and his voice trembled _(I'm not lying, I'm not lying). _"I haven't seen my friends in ages," _(Hands on hips, a stern expression that constantly slipped into a smile. "Alex John Rider, when was the last time you had friends round?" a spatula waved at him. And he had tugged out his ear-phones and given her a blank look- because what did she _mean? _But her smile had dropped like a wintering flower, eyes going sad and hurt and- "I'm going to see them tonight, actually," and he had smiled. Smiled like he meant it. And it was worth the lie when she smiled back)_ his hands went back to _pulling, tugging, wrenching _at the material of his top.

Wolf ran a hand through his hair, flopping back into the sofa and closing his eyes briefly before opening them again. "I know, Cub," and although his voice was gruff, it sounded like he actually _did _understand. "I know. But at the moment, it's just not safeto have you out there. I'm sorry,"

Nodding once, tersely, Alex stared at the floor.

_Plan B._

He flinched.

He didn't _want _to use Plan B.

_Plan __**B, **_the voice insisted harshly.

("_Promise us you won't lie to us"._

_ "I promise.")_

_**You'd better well do Plan B!**_

****The voice was so furious, so dagger sharp that his mouth opened and the words slipped out (like poisonous gas, like serpents and snakes) before he could stop them. "Fine. Then, can I at least go to Tom's house?"

"Tom?"

He felt _sick. _Nodding, he looked up, his face hopeful and still slightly grudging. "Can I, then? That should be OK, right?"

Wolf swapped a look with Fox.

Why not?

Turning back to Alex, he jerked his chin in acquiescence, waving one hand at him. "Fine. But you have to give us a time for us to pick you up at. And I'm depositing you personally at his door."

Swallowing down that screaming, squirming, moaning feeling in his gut, Alex grinned at him, eyes alight. "Thanks, Wolf!"

Wolf couldn't hold back a small smile of his own as he took in Alex's beaming expression. "Time, Cub."

"Oh, yeah, is 7:30 OK?"

Wolf nodded vaguely, but called him back as Alex made to run up the stairs to get ready.

"Cub, I want you to promise me something."

Alex paused in the doorway, watching Wolf and Fox warily, his hand curling around the door frame. "What?"

Wolf looked at Alex seriously, his eyes piercing, pinning. Involuntarily, Alex found himself going rigid against the door frame, his eyes somewhat losing their faux cheerful light.

"I want you to promise that you _won't _go to that party."

The breath froze in Alex's chest.

_Promise._

His fingers twitched against the frame.

"Promise us, Alex," his voice was deep, rumbling through Alex's chest and echoing through his head.

_Promise;_ _an assurance that one will definitely do, give, or arrange something; undertake or declare that something will happen._

_ Promise; vow, pledge, undertaking etc._

_ What is a promise but a word, Alex? Promises don't _mean _anything. A promise is a meaningless thing- it's a word. A word that is made up of breath and sound. Just 'promise' and be done with it._

_ Promise, then!_

_ ("Promise, Alex!")_

_ Promise them!_

"I promise,"

Wolf lost the wrinkle between his eyebrows, and his face instantly relaxed. "Good kid," _(and his smile was painful, his praise felt like knives in his gut) _"I trust you. You'd better get ready, we'll be leaving in 5,"

Nodding, slipping through the doorway, Alex treaded up the stairs, and tried to ignore the fact that he felt _awful, _that his mouth was gasping for breaths that he didn't need.

_Good boy, Alex, _the golden voice purred, immaterially smoothing down Alex's hair in commendation.

And the praise made him feel physically sick.

* * *

"Right, we'll come for you at 10."

"11."

"_10, _Cub- no later,"

Scowling, doing the maths in his head (that meant he'd have to get to the party at exactly 8, mingle a bit, make up some excuse, and then spend about an hour and a half at his house and around the area. It was a tight time limit, but he'd just have to manage it. "Fine," he said, one hand on the car door.

"I mean it, Cub," Wolf growled, glaring at Alex. "And _stay in the house! _Don't leave, OK?"

"OK," he said impatiently, glancing at the block of tidy flats where Tom lived- number 8, he remembered, time was passing _(time and he were worst enemies) _and he needed to go. "Can we go now?"

Wolf took a brief moment to scrutinize Alex before nodding. "Come on." He snapped his seatbelt off and stepped out of the car.

Luckily, the whole entourage had been firmly denied to come along with Wolf and Alex, so it was just the darker man who would be dropping Alex off at Tom's doorstep.

"You got your phone?" Wolf asked gruffly, digging his hands into his pockets after jabbing the intercom button.

Alex nodded, patting his pocket vaguely, his eyes scanning the surroundings with a sharpness that alarmed Wolf.

"Stop that," the man snapped.

Cold eyes flickered onto him before dropping the decidedly metallic look to them. "Stop what?" Cub sounded genuinely confused.

Wolf didn't get a chance to explain as the door opened. Frowning at Alex instead (much to his bewilderment) and shaking his head, Wolf pushed the door open and ushered Alex into the warmly carpeted area, making his way up the soft stairs.

Wolf turned to stare at Alex, as a soft mumbling reached his ears. Eyebrows lowering in bafflement, Wolf watched as the teen watched the steps with almost detached interest, his mouth moving to form cloud-like murmurs.

He was…counting the stairs.

Noticing the attention he was getting, Alex looked up, caught Wolf's eye and then went back to counting the stairs again.

Shaking his head and muttering about the weirdness of some kids, Wolf finally stepped off of the stairs (24 if Cub had indeed counted right) and stopped when he reached number 8, knocking on it with a burst of sharp knocks with his knuckle.

It wasn't long before shuffling and yelling was heard behind the door, and soon with a _click _the door opened, revealing a harried looking Tom Harris who quickly fixed his irritated look when he saw who was standing at the door. "Alex!" he yelled in enthusiasm, swinging the door open wider to show just how hospitable he was. "And Roman! Come in!"

Wolf narrowed his eyes slightly, wondering whether he had just imagined the brief look of confusion on the teens round face. Flicking his eyes down to Cub who was already moving towards the door, Wolf shrugged the thought off. Those two were weird friends, that was for sure.

Holding up a hand, he shook his head, smiling as another head popped round the corner- the older brother, it seemed. "I'm just here to drop Alex off," he nodded at Cub as the teen turned to look up at him. For a moment, he awkwardly stood there, wondering whether he should give him a hug or something to send him off. In the end, pressured by the confused look Tom and his older brother were giving him, wondering why he was just standing in the doorway and staring at Alex with an almost frightening look on his face, he settled with gripping Cub's head and pulling it in rough manly affection into his chest, muttering "have a good time" and "10" into the kids hair. Pulling away, nodding once to the householders, he spun militaristically on his heel and marched back down the 24 stairs he had come up.

"Cool guy," Jerry stated as the door was closed and locked, his face an amused smile.

"Yeah," Tom grinned at his older brother. "He's a soldier!"

"That so?" Jerry's eyes gradually dropped to Alex who stood nearer the door, brown eyes flashing all over the place, lingering on the windows and kitchen drawers. "You OK, Alex? Been a long time, yeah?" he stuck out one hand.

For a brief millisecond, Alex examined the hand thrust before him before taking it in a firm grip and smiling at the older boy or young man. "I'm fine, thank you. And yes, it has been quite a while,"

Releasing the oddly cold hand, Jerry grinned at him. "Yeah, well, saving the world and everything, right?"

"Jerry!" Tom hissed, embarrassed, nudging his brother and glancing at Alex.

For a moment there, Tom was sure that he'd seen Alex stiffen, his eyes flash to dull before the look lifted, and a gentle and unassuming smile was back in place (just like make-up). "Something like that." But the tone was neither friendly nor cold. It was just…_there. _Alex was just…_speaking. _

Unaware of Tom's thoughts, Jerry gestured to down the hall and up some stairs. "You might as well go into Tom's room-"

"_Jerry!"_

"-until Tom finishes cleaning the kitchen out," he finished, ignoring Tom's interruption.

Alex, who had been doing his very best to ignore the pink flowery washing up gloves that his friend _(he was, wasn't he?) _was sporting, found his eyes fixed on the insulting objects attached to Tom's unwilling hands. "I noticed," he said dryly, mouth doing that odd _wriggly _thing that it had been doing for a while now _(it had been so long since he had last _looked _like that. Last felt the stirring of some firefly like warmth to his chest. How long had-) _since coming back. "Would you like some help?"

Tom opened his mouth to reply (probably a loud yes) but Jerry got there before him. "Nah, you're alright, Alex. Just go and sit upstairs and relax. Shouldn't take long." So saying, he grabbed up Tom's shoulder and manhandled him into the kitchen, seemingly deaf to his protests.

Hesitating by the stairs, wondering whether to stay and listen _(they're going to talk about you Alex. Whisper things and scheme behind your back. They're trying to _hurt _you, Alex) _behind the door, he finally decided not to. Tom was painfully easy to read. If he ever wanted to find out what they had been talking about, it would be frighteningly easy to do so. So saying, he slipped up the stairs, counting softly under his breath.

When Jerry was certain Alex had gone up the stairs (he couldn't even _hear _Alex _move! _Was he like a, like, some sort of ninja spy or something?), he turned to face Tom, his countenance flipping to serious. "Were you expecting him tonight?"

In frustration, Tom shook his head, scrubbing at a bowl brutally, splashing Jerry (much to his own delight) with soap bubbles. "No. It's that party tonight, remember?"

"Oh," Jerry nodded, trailing away to go and grab an apple. "Then why didn't you just say that as soon as he turned up?"

"_Because," _Tom explained not-so-patiently through gritted teeth. "When Alex just turns up, no explanation at your door, you _know _that something's going on. He's not a random person. You don't question the things that he does," a little more purposefully this time, he flicked more bubbles at his brother.

Nodding solemnly, taking a bite of apple, he mulled over that thought for a while, staring at the wall where the clock hung. "Huh. So, you going to tell him about the dead bird and flowers?" he asked casually, taking another bite out of his apple.

Tom slowed down his frenzied scouring of the pot he was attempting to clean, eyes dimming and shoulders dropping slightly. "I don't know," his voice was quiet, gently scrubbing at the pot with small and almost meek movements of his wrist. "I mean, I don't even know whether we're friends now."

"Well, you should hurry up and apologise, then. You were good friends before. Good friends don't let silly things get in between them."

Tom looked at his brother, wondering when he'd suddenly become so smart.

Jerry caught his little brothers eye and chuckled. "When you're older, Tom, when you're older."

Tom answered by splashing washing water on him.

Jerry retaliated by grabbing the basin and dumping it over his head.

* * *

Alex looked up at the sound of yelling, his body going rigid before he realised that the shouting was followed by teasing laughter and he visibly relaxed, his eyes fluttering shut before flinging open as Tom barged into the room, looking both irritated and happy at the same time- an odd mixture of emotions.

Spotting Alex sat on his desk chair, he did a double take, not having seen him sat in the shadows from when he first walked in. Folding his arms across his chest and stubbornly denying the thumping of his heart, he pursed his lips in a prim fashion as he examined his unexpected arrival. "What, you like sitting in the darkness, do you?"

"It is somewhat refreshing, actually," was the smooth reply, Alex tipping back on the chair, his eyes never leaving Tom's face.

"Sorry Luke Skywalker, but I remain firmly on the path of light and justice," Tom replied steadfastly, thumping one determined hand to his (oddly) damp chest.

"You'll change your mind soon enough. We get cooler names here on the Dark Side,"

Tom took a challenging step forward. "Yeah?"

Alex eyed him coolly. "Yeah. Like Rainbow Raider. I _know _you want that name."

And Alex's voice was so serious, so _believable _that Tom found himself clutching at his stomach laughing. Still laughing, Tom caught Alex's eye and just burst out laughing again, even eliciting a stream of vanilla cream laughter from his friend.

Settling down, still grinning lie a madman, Tom flopped onto his bed, staring up at the ceiling. "So, Al, fancy telling why you're here, or is it top-secret?"

The smile somewhat faded from Alex's face as he stared down at his knees. "I'm going out to the party too- I thought I'd-" he stopped when Tom sat up and gave him a cold look.

Dropping his head, twisting to the side, he murmured a soft sorry to the wall.

Tom dragged one hand down his face and sighed softly, a frown slipping into place already. "It's OK. Just…tell me the truth, yeah?"

_The truth._

_ ("And how much do you _really _know, Alex? No…not that. How much do you _know _to be the Truth? The utter and absolute truth?") _"I'm not meant to go to the party- they said it was too dangerous- but I _need _to go. They don't understand that I can look after myself,"

Tom twitched at the intensity in Alex's words. Scrubbing the back of his hand against his brow, Tom frowned. "But why've you got to go to the party so desperately?"

Alex chanced a look up at him, noting the way Tom sat leaned forward, his blue eyes wide and round, so curious, so _("it's as fleeting as a shadow") innocent._

So unlike _him._

"I don't. Not to the party, anyway," he explained as Tom's frown began to deepen. "The only reason I'm going is so that I can get out of the house to go and…have a look around the place."

Tom stared at Alex.

_Go look around…?_

Yeah right.

Whenever Alex said such seemingly easy words as _"have a look around the place" _it usually meant danger was following him, lurking after him. "You sure that's a good idea?" he asked uncomfortably, eyes still remaining latched onto Alex's face though. "If they said no, wouldn't it be smarter to follow their advice?"

_(Yesyesyesyes-) _"No, I need to do this." _(No I don't! I don't! Talk me out of it! _Please! _Talk me out-)_

Tom kept his gaze locked with Alex's saw the cool _(scared, confused- no, not scared- pleading) _look in them and nodded once, slowly. "Don't get yourself killed," he said roughly, tugging at his damp shirt and glancing at Alex.

The smile he received in return was gentle but odd- as if he was hoping for a different outcome. "I've told you," Alex's voice was soft, not quite linked to reality. "I'm not easy to kill."

Tom froze; mind whizzing back to the cracked and treasured moment of so long ago.

_"I'm not easy to kill"_

So he did remember.

Tom stood up jerkily. "I need to get ready."

Alex nodded, eyes already straying elsewhere- to dusty locations and shredded pathways- and who knew, perhaps his eyes travelled back to where they once used to walk.

Savagely, Tom tore off his top.

Who _knew _what went through Alex's head?

* * *

Loud.

It was _loud._

"It's loud in here, isn't it, Al?" Tom whooped into Alex's ear, only creating more noise.

Stiffly, uncomfortably, Alex nodded, his eyes following the progress of a girl who was tottering around in ridiculously high heels, her skirt almost non-existent and clutching a bottle to her chest. So, he was right about the alcohol.

"Loosen up, Al!" Tom grinned, clasping his friends shoulder in an attempt to get rid of the stiffness to it.

Alex shot him a look. "I _am _loose," he insisted.

Tom raised one eyebrow at him. Spy and saver of the world Alex may have been, but he was definitely no partier. "No," he tried to explain patiently though Alex noticed the way his eyes constantly moved towards a group of his friends in the corner and some girl that was batting her eyelashes at him. "I mean _relax _a little. You look like you're here to _watch _them- not join in,"

Alex jerked out of the way as a Congo Line made its way past him, moving away as someone made a grab for his shoulder to join. The evasion looked accidental to anyone but Tom who saw the quick flash of horror across Alex's face before he did. "How do I _do _that?"

Tom looked surprised at the almost _terror _in Alex's voice. Not the terror that best friends were allowed to laugh at, but something deeper, something deeper and more fragile. Alex's brown eyes flashed pleadingly onto him. "I don't know _how!" _and though Alex's voice was low in the shrieks and screams of laughter and drunk teenagers, though it was near silent compared to the loudness of the music and heavy beat, Tom still caught it like a star from the sky.

And it scared him.

"It's OK, Alex. All you do is-" he broke off, shutting his mouth as confusion flooded his face. What _did _you do? Wasn't relaxing supposed to be _normal?_ Clearing his throat, he lamely tried a different approach, Alex still watching him with that crippled desperation in his eyes. "I suppose you just-"

"_Alex! _You could _come!"_

Alex sucked in a harsh breath as twin arms grabbed him in a hug, hair _(dry hair, crimson hair) _tickling against his chin and nose. Eyes wide, desperately trying to think of a way to get this thing _off _of him, he almost gasped in relief as Regina pulled back.

Her heavily done up eyes (now smeared with electric blue eye-shadow along with her usual mascara) smiled up at him, one hand reaching out to clasp his (not-fast-enough) retreating hand whilst the other held what looked like a glass of heavy punch- he could smell the alcohol on her breath. "I'm _soo _glad that you made it!" Regina squinted at the god in front of her, the smudging lights making his hair seem even more gold. He was stood in a simple t-shirt, hooded beige jacket (though it was hard to tell in the dim lighting) and dark grey jeans, but to Regina (and her alcohol blurred mind) he looked positively _godly._ "You look _good, _Alex!"

Alex flinched back as a hand dropped onto his middle chest. Glancing at Tom who _happened _to be looking in the wrong direction, he attempted to pull the hand off of him. "Yeah, I came," he decided to ignore the last remark- not knowing quite how to reply to that. It was too _loud_ _(and the gunshot was loud in the silence- a burst of _something _against nothingness that shattered into a thousand stabbing-) _in here!

"You 'K Aleexx? You look slightly _tense," _she rested her chin on his chest, eyelashes lowered seductively.

Alex had seen _potatoes _that were more seductive than her.

Slightly panicking now, the loudness of the area coupled with the scream of his Personal Space Guard was deafening. "I think you're drunk," he said, voice low.

She raised her glass, giggling and splashing the liquid over him. "_Everyone _is! And so should you be! Here!"

Alex had to physically wrench his head away before her drunken hand smashed her glass into his teeth. "I'm fine," he said hurriedly, pulling away from her. "Seriously."

"You sure?" she murmured in a question. Her breath smelt minty against his face _(too close! Too close! Retreat required!) _and it tickled his nose as her lips inched (with the subtlety of a blindfolded Rhinoceros) closer to his.

"Quite sure," he murmured back, lowering his own lashes in imitation of her.

Regina's face burnt red. "Alex," she muttered, hand moving up to his hair now.

"You're drunk." He repeated.

Regina pulled a face, squinting up her eyes. "Dammit, Ally, _relax _and _go with it!" _she sulked as he refused to move closer as she tugged at him. "You're hardly even acting like a _teenager!"_

The words struck something in Alex.

Pain hit him.

Cold now, Alex pulled back, forcefully extracting her from his clothes. "I'm not interested." His voice was clipped and sharp as he moved away from her, ignoring her wails of complaint as he did so.

"Hey, Alex. Alex. Alex!" Tom shoved past people to reach his friend who strode ahead, wondering vaguely how he managed to get people to move out of his way without touching or speaking to them. "Hey!" finally, he managed to catch hold of Alex's arm before he moved off any further. "It's OK, yeah?"

Alex's face said the opposite.

Tom tried to calm the teen down. "It's barely been 10 minutes here, Alex. You need to mingle, remember? You said you needed to mingle so it would at least look like you turned up but just got lost in the crowd when people try and find you," he had to shout over the noise as he shook his head at an offer for a drink, disliking the taste of alcohol himself. "Just take it easy, yeah? Teen mode, now." And he shot Alex a grin and a cheesy thumbs up.

_Like a mission, _something whispered eagerly.

_No, not like a mission, _he thought sourly back, wondering why that was a thought that distressed him. Was it the fact that this was real life? Real life that he was failing at? Sure, he could get 100% on-

He jumped as Tom snapped his fingers in front of his face, shooting his shorter friend and irate look.

Tom merely scowled good naturedly in reply. "And no blanking out here, Al,"

Nodding once, Alex allowed himself to be led towards Tom's group of friends _(used to be mine, too. But I can't _have _anything for myself now, can I? Nothing nothing noth-) _smiling genially at the rowdy applause Tom got, the slaps on the backs and the jokes that he _(wasn't part of. They've all forgotten me) _didn't understand.

"Guess whose back?" Tom smiled widely, ducking out of the way of another slap on the back and weaving towards Alex. "Alex!"

Wary eyes swivelled onto him.

Alex raised an imperious eyebrow.

Tom, not to be daunted by the tense atmosphere turned to Ryan who was watching Alex apprehensively. "See, Ryan? You were right!"

Ryan struggled with a smile, his hands rubbing nervously at his arms. "Um, yeah," he croaked.

Luckily (or maybe not so luckily) the stiff atmosphere was broken by a horde of girls led by Regina to come and tell them off for being so boring and just standing in the corner. Soon they were being dragged further up and onto the makeshift 'dance floor' and being ordered to break some moves.

Alex stood stiff as Tom broke out into some highly embarrassing routine of which had the others bent over laughing. Tom caught Alex's eye in the flashing light and gestured, mouthing "dance!" to him. Feigning casualness, Alex shook his head _("Don't be such a bore, Alex! Come on, dance! I know you can! Dance with me, Alex" He'd groaned, putting down his book as two smaller hands pulled at his. "Come on!" and then she'd twirled him round and they'd danced around the kitchen table and into the living room in ridiculous parody of a waltz, stepping on each others toes more than twice, her bright eyes laughing as he'd banged into the side of the door, red hair floating as she pretended to waltz. "Not bad, Alex! Not bad at all!") _and attempted to swallow down painful memories that sobbed their way upwards.

Regina swooped (stumbled) down upon him, gripping his wrists and attempting a flirtatious _(she was just a _child, _really though, wasn't she?) _smile. "Dance with me, Alex!"

_("Dance with me, Alex!")_

"No, I'm fine," and his porcelain voice _didn't _crack, neither did his head jerk back in that way that suggested he'd received a violet blow made from memories and past.

But his voice was too soft to be heard, and soon he was forced by numerous girlish hands to "dance with me!". The music was heavy- a rhythm Alex couldn't get used to- a constant _thump thump thump _and heavy yelling that drove through his head and distorted the atmosphere into one of an almost fantasy like place, full of flashing lights, dancing people and a heavy _feeling _of loss of control in the area.

For someone who liked control like Alex; it was the equivalent to hell on earth.

Finally, Alex managed to escape the entangling hands and giggling laughter and managed to find a place to lean against, his eye lashes lowered as he examined the surroundings, not moving as Tom came to stand next to him, watching the party move along without them.

"Sometimes," Tom looked up at the sudden voice, but Alex wasn't watching him, his eyes still on the crowd of teenagers, someone throwing up in a corner. Tom settled back to watching like Alex, wondering what the difference was between what he saw and what Alex saw (But the world was like that. I see yellow this way, you see yellow that way).

"I wonder whether this is what the world would be without me," Alex said softly, though again, somehow, his voice was discernible in the rowdy atmosphere.

Tom wrinkled his nose in distaste as the throwing up boy toppled a little too close to his recent breakfast, lunch and dinner. "What, throwing up into corners?" as soon as the words slipped as a piped noise through his mouth, he cursed himself. Now was not the time to be making jokes! Why couldn't he understand that?

Luckily, Alex just laughed softly. "No, just-" he paused, searching for a word amongst the thousands. "_keeping on going." _His eyes trailed after something that was undoubtedly there, but Tom just couldn't see. "Whether time would stop for me,"

The sound in Alex's voice made Tom feel both sad and uncomfortable at the same time.

Awkwardly, Tom shrugged. "It'd stop my time for a while," he offered with a small smile.

It seemed to be the right thing to say.

Tom literally _glowed _when he saw the expression on Alex's usually emotionless face.

"Yeah?" the blond teen looked down at him, a serene smile in place _(and in _this _reality, Tom had succeeded where the other Tom had failed). _"Thank you,"

And Tom could just _tell _that he meant it.

Alex pulled away from the wall and glanced at his watch, the moment (whatever it was) was gone. "Ten more minutes,"

Tom grinned at the weary tone in Alex's voice, and was about to slyly insinuate how he should go and spend some time with Regina and her friends before he left, when another more important remembrance struck him.

The flowers and the bird!

How could he have forgotten?

"Alex!"

Alex looked down at Tom whose face was suddenly pinched in anxiety. Warily, Alex looked down on him. "What's up?" he kept his voice light to alleviate _(no one does that for you. Why do _you _have to be the one who constantly helps others?) _some of the stress it looked like Tom was carrying.

It seemed to somewhat do the job as Tom's shoulders dropped marginally, his eyes losing that frightened quality to it as it had before. "It's just," Tom screwed up his face. Having to yell this out wasn't quite _right. _Though he knew nobody could hear them, it didn't put his tensions to rest. He tried again, leaning into Alex's ear this time. "It's just that someone's been leaving us flowers- Begonia's."

Begonia's?

Oh _no._

Oh _no, no, no._

"Alex?" Tom asked as Alex suddenly went stiff.

"Keep going," he ordered. "How many?" he ignored the way Tom flinched back from his voice. Now wasn't the _time _to give him _teenage Alex!_

"Um, first time was 21, and the second was 26." He calculated quickly, seeing the look of tension flowing from Alex's body. "But the second bouquet we got had a dead blackbird in it with this tied around it's ankle," rummaging through his pockets, pulling out wads of gum and old tissues, he finally pulled out the small slip of coloured paper, muttering "manners" as Alex snatched it out of his hands.

Feverish eyes scanned the paper and a frozen mouth mouthed the words:

**_When down came a blackbird,_**

**_And pecked off her nose!_**

"When did you get this?" Alex could hardly _breathe. _The walls were merging with the floor and the sounds were too loud too loud too loud- and dammit!- he _knew _this verse! He knew what it meant but that wasn't the question the question was, the question was _("Stop asking questions! Questions aren't for you to-") _the question- he _knew _this! But _why _were they sending it to- why- what did it _mean? _And when-

"Yesterday," Tom looked in alarm at Alex's face which had lost all of its colour. He looked sick, pale and ill. "Alex, I'm sorry I forgot to tell you I just-"

But Alex wasn't listening anymore. He was stood stiff and tense, his eyes flickering all around him, suddenly losing every inch of bare teenager-ishness that he may have had before.

Yesterday.

**_DANGER. EVACUATE PREMISIES IMMEDIATELY._**

****Alex tried to swallow the rising tide of _something _that was bursting inside of him _(excitement? Fear? Anger?) _and threatening to swamp him (he _couldn't _lose control. He _hated _it when he wasn't in control).

Tom jerked as Alex suddenly spun around to face him, eyes wide and frighteningly bright with something Tom couldn't quite decipher.

"Listen to me," Alex's voice was sharp and blade-like. "Right now, we're in danger." he carried on even as Tom made to interrupt. "No!" he snapped roughly, even violently. "I said _listen _to me!" Tom shut up. There was something in that voice that demanded to be heard and obeyed. Nodding tightly, grabbing Tom's arm and peering around, ignoring the gazes of some who had noticed what was going on but the music too loud to hear, he carried on in that same (scary) intense voice. "We're in danger. Something's going to happen. You should've told me _sooner _but it's too late now. When it happens- don't _look _at me like that, Tom. It _will _happen. When something happens, I need you to go straight home- phone Jerry, get him to pick you up. And when K-Unit- my guardians come to yours to pick me up, if I'm not there by the time they get there, stall. OK?" the eyes, if possible, heightened in intensity.

And Tom didn't know how, but his head was nodding furiously, mouth babbling his yeses and-

"Good," Alex straightened up.

And he looked so _cold._

Just- _cold._

"I've got to go," his eyes were dark, voice so (frightening, terrifying, like the personification of a tsunami or terrible natural disaster-) threatening that Tom took an unconscious step backwards; taking another step as those (he didn't _know _this boy! This _wasn't _Alex!) deadened eyes fixed on his. "I'll be back at yours before 10. Make sure you've been home for at least 15 minutes."

Although Tom didn't believe him (Alex, back before 10? But what if something _happened?), _although Tom was confused as to what was going on, again, he found his head nodding warily, eyes fixed on Alex, body backing up into the wall.

Relief flashed briefly through his eyes and Alex made to turn around when-

"_We're looking for a Tom Harris!_"

The yell was sudden, loud in the music, and heads turned round to face the sound of the yell.

Tom's face went white.

Men stood dotted about through the room, their eyes flipping around the room; ignoring the looks that the teens gave him.

Tom hardly heard the stutters of complaint as the men moved forward through the room, screams and scrambles abundant as some tried to clumsily move away from the men who barked out for _"Tom Harris!" _in loud and harsh voices.

He was going to _die._

_ Die die diediediedie-_

He couldn't help it.

His eyes flashed over to Alex's in that one moment of fear ridden timelessness, and the emotion just _surged _(he couldn't _help _it) through his eyes and-

He _resented _Alex at that moment.

If only he had never known him.

If only he had _never known him..._

_ Resented._

Tom blinked and tried to pull away from that thought even as one of the men moved closer to them, trying to forget the way Alex's eyes took in the look in his eyes wordlessly, as if he didn't need to say anything at all in response to the gaze.

Alex gazed down at his friend briefly.

The blond haired teen closed his eyes.

Then he turned and barelled into one of the men.

The screams of horror were loud as Alex leaped onto the man, people diving out of the way to try and frenziedly get out of the way of the scuffling pair.

Tom's voice could hardly work though his mouth squirmed (useless. Useless. Utterly _useless_) into desperate shapes to try and squeeze his unwilling voice _outoutout _of his mouth. The sight of a gun grasped in the mens hands that pounded over to where Alex fought _(his lip was split, his gaze ferocious) _stopped all thought in his mind.

A _gun._

His gaze blurred even as the screaming reached an intense pitch, people diving out of the room, ducking, shrieking-

A _gun._

_ The pain was sharp as it slammed into his arm, and he could only gape at the blood that suddenly seemed to flow out of his limb, staining it a too red red, dripping down his arm in rivulets of ruby and rose. Then the pain came, sharp and breathless pain that demanded his attention with every furious and hoarse screech of it's cruel mouth. And the overriding thought that dominated his mind was _pain.

Suddenly, the man Alex was fighting was down on the floor, out cold (though Tom didn't see how it had happened) and Alex was reaching out towards him, a _look _on his face as his hands gripped Tom's arm in a ruthless grip and shoved him forcefully into Ryan who had somehow managed to get behind him.

"Get everyone out of here," Tom hadn't heard that voice before on Alex- sharp and commanding- useless to try and go again- the voice of a leader. Those brown eyes fixed him ferociously, the split lip dribbling blood down his chin. "Remember what I told-"

"Alex Rider," a voice drawled and Tom watched as Alex's head snapped towards the voice- a man walking towards them, his hands shoved into his pockets. "I wasn't expecting to see _you _here," the mans voice was lazy as he drew his eyes up and down Alex's stiff form. "Hm, well, that saves me a job, I suppose," he smiled, except it was lifeless, one hand gesturing in almost boredom to where Alex stood. "Get him." he ordered.

"Run, Tom!" Alex yelled as the men rushed forward towards him.

Tom opened his mouth- perhaps to protest, perhaps to cry out, perhaps to call Alex back, perhaps-

But it didn't matter.

Ryan's grip was fierce on Tom's arm as he hauled the boy towards the exit amongst the flood of stumbling, yelling teenagers. Tom's hand smacked into a drink and he watched as it fell, the glass shattering into thousands of pieces onto the floor, spilling the red punch all over the place.

Ryan twisted his head round to look at Tom, shoving past the teenagers as they clumsily tried to run through the door, some sobbing into their breaths in panic. Ryan caught Tom trying desperately to peer back through the mass of frenzied teens, attempting to catch a glance of that familiar blond head. "Hurry up, Tom!" and he didn't care that his voice was an unmanly pitch in his terror. Those men had _guns _for crying out loud! Wrapping his fingers tighter around Tom's arm in his panic, he yanked the appendage to make it move faster, stumbling as he ran into some girls who couldn't run properly in their high heeled shoes.

Tom forced himself to look forward again, opening his mouth to yell over the noises of panic when the sound curled up and died in his throat.

"_Ryan!" _he screamed.

Ryan jerked to a halt as he stared at the massive man in front of him-

Pointing a gun directly at his chest.

If anything, the screams got louder.

"Hand over Tom Harris," came the rough voice over the shrieks and scrambles of the teenagers, twitching the gun almost lazily towards Ryan's chest.

Ryan's throat moved, but no sound came out. His hands were sweating, eyes pinned on the gun as if it was singing him in- like some deadly and metallic Siren.

"Very well. If that's-"

Ryan literally jumped as a body slammed into the man's side, tossing the huge creature onto the floor.

Those who were still inside screamed and leaped away from the two people on the floor.

Alex.

Swiftly, the teen somehow managed to pin the man down long enough to look up and-

Tom felt his heart lurch, stomach drop (he was going to be sick. He was going to be sick. He was going to be sick. He was going to be-) as his feverish eyes took in his _(he had to be, he had to be) _friend.

Alex ignored the blood that was near dripping into his eye from a nasty cut on his eyebrow and used his tongue to quickly swipe away some of the ruby red liquid that still fell from his bust lip. "I thought I told you to _get out of here!"_he snapped, jerking as the man beneath him decided to fight back. Tom flinched away from Alex as he literally _growled _at the man beneath him, his eyes alight with some wild sort of desperation. "Well?" he yelled to Tom, glaring (and he knew now. He knew what the 'some' was in the 'wild sort of desperation'. It was fear- fear for losing...him? Tom?) at his shorter friend, dodging a vicious swipe aimed at the side of his head. "_Run!"_

Ryan yelped and dived away as Alex attacked the man he was fighting.

"Wait!" Tom shouted as Ryan dragged him bodily away from the scene, attempting to pull away from Ryan (half-heartedly. He didn't _want _to go back there!) to go and (he didn't _need _it!) assist Alex. "They're after _me!_ I can't just-"

"All the more reason for you to run, then!" Ryan snapped, his hand gripping in a painful grip around Tom's own. "Stop being an idiot and hurry up!"  
They stumbled out onto the street just as they spotted even more men stood around the corners.

"Damn it," Ryan's voice was soft, frightened as he slowed down, the men's eyes snapping onto them. Faintly, his knees trembling every so slightly as he staggered back, Ryan gazed at the three threatening men. "What have you gotten yourself _into, _Tom?" his voice squeaked at the end, almost choking on his words.

"It wasn't me!" Tom hastily defended, also moving backwards.

"What are you still doing here?" a tired voice barked from behind them.

They spun around, but the holder of the voice _(Alex. Alex) _shoved them harshly forward to move out of the doorway.

"We got-"

"What do you want?" Alex's snarling voice cut off Tom's hurried response, his eyes fiery, hair pushed back lightly from the nightly wind. He spared a quick glance at his slightly cracked watch and scowled internally. He'd need to work fast on this. It would be time for K-Unit to come and pick him up from Tom's in a mere 40 minutes.

"Deaf as well as stupid," one of the men croaked in a brutal parody of a laugh, the streetlight casting mocking shadows to leer across his face at them. "Tom Harris. But then again, _Alex Rider, _the goal was to lure you in," the mens wrists twitched as one and guns appeared once again.

"Don't do anything stupid, Alex," Tom hissed, backing up as he kept his eyes (frightened) warily on the metal embodiments of deathandpainandhurtanddestruction.

Alex chose to ignore that statement and ignore Ryan who was whispering mixed curses and high-pitched prayers under his breath- though his hand refused to let go of Tom's arm, Alex noted with a lowering of his brown eyes as he took in the action. Nodding softly to himself, Alex allowed himself to relax slightly. Ryan was loyal. Tom was safe.

At the moment, that was what mattered.

(_"What _matter's, _Alex, is that you personally manage to get away safely. Collateral damage can be accosted for later. Just remember to-") _"When I say go, go- yeah?" he tried to force his voice into something that was soft _("Shh, it's OK now. OK?") _and gentle _("I'll look after you,") _but he couldn't quite work out whether it worked- the blood roaring and screeching through his ears made it difficult to concentrate on anything else other than that then and there moment. "Don't worry. I'll meet you back at your house." he hesitated as the men took a leery step forward, and wondered whether he should say the next part of his train of shying thoughts. "And if I don't turn up and it's obvious that I won't, tell my guardians that I'll meet them at home,"

"What are you going to do?" Ryan squeaked, unconsciously backing behind Alex.

For a brief, unnatural moment, Alex had the startling and midnight desire to grin; bare his teeth in some feral notion of a smile.

Instead, he forced the unnerving _(what was wrong with him?!) _though down and tried to squash the light upraising of the corners of his lips down. "I'll buy time for you. Don't stop. Just run."

"But-"

"Now!"

Ryan didn't bother even pausing. He darted forward, yelling, dragging Tom with him who was yelling things at Alex that the teenager didn't bother to attempt to translate, as he was already moving towards the men that lunged towards the weaving Ryan and Tom.

Taking a deep breath, Alex began to sprint towards them and managed to slam his shoulder into the arm that wielded the gun that was pointing towards Ryan.

With a grunt, the weapon dropped from the man's fingers. Oddly enough, it didn't seem to bother him as one huge paw swept at Alex's face-a blow that he only managed to sway from, ducking sharply as his instincts screamed at him- missing the punch aimed at the back of his head by a hairs-breadth. Panting now _("you're weak! You're weak!" screaming voices and shoving hands. But he was trying his _best! _He was trying his-), _groaning as a kick clipped him on the side of his head. He had to get up off of the floor! This wasn't a safe-

A strangled noise escaped his mouth as a blow smacked him on the side of his neck, causing his head to slam down onto the hard cold floor, eyes blurring.

**_MOVE! _**Quickly, he rolled away, scraping his knees on the floor in an attempt to dive away from a foot that made to stamp onto his back. Struggling up, Alex ran towards a lamppost, ducking out and away of another brutal fist, squirming as yet another hand clapped onto the back of his shirt. "Let go!" he snapped, bucking and heaving in the merciless grip. _("Control, Alex! In a fight you can never lose control!") _He _hated _being unable to do anything! He _hated _being out of control! Grabbing the hand behind him, he twisted it viciously at the same time of yanking his body to the left, smiling grimly at the sound of the pained yell behind him, the hand dropping off of his shirt.

Once again, Alex dived forward.

**_Outnumbered. Status- weak. Functioning at 34% Suggestions: flight._**

****Shaking the cold analysis out of his head, he forced his legs to move _fasterfasterfaster._

But Lady Luck really hated him today.

He could feel the blow coming, here the sobbing and desperate command of his instincts to **_MOVE NOW! _**but his weakened body was too slow in avoiding the nasty strike to the back of his head.

_I knew I should've stayed home, _was his last thought as his body collapsed to the ground.

Lifeless.

* * *

"Tom, what on earth's happened to you!" Jerry gripped the teen and dragged him towards one of their patched and worn sofa's, shoving a hot drink into his little brother's hands and cursing softly as it splashed over his own larger hands. "Tom?"

Dazedly, Tom stared at the liquid (not red like Alex's blood had been. Brown. Not red like-) and vaguely wondered how the cup had gotten into his clenching hands.

"Tom." Jerry knelt down so he was at eye-level with Tom, and was relieved to see his little brothers eyes attempt to fix onto his. "What's wrong?" he said slowly and steadily.

Tom blinked at him and moved his numb mouth. "Men...guns..." he swallowed back his want to cry out _Alex!_

Jerry patted Tom's shoulder and nodded reassuringly, forcing down the anxious thumps of his heart. "Are you OK? You're not hurt, are you?"

Tom shook his head in frustration. "No, I'm not hurt. Alex helped me get away. My friend- the one who's in the bathroom now- helped too,"

Jerry shook his head, frowning.

When he'd gotten a call from Tom to _"hurry up and pick us up! Quick!" _he'd been frantic. Tom and his friend had near dived into the car when he had appeared, and gave him no chance to ask questions as they yelled at him to _"drive. And fast!"_

But now here Tom was looking as if he'd seen a collection of ghosts, his hands trembling in dusty shivers, eyes not focussed and mouth looking dry and stiff.

"What happened to Alex?"

"He helped us get away," Tom sent him a wounded and rebuking look. "I told you that already."

He had, hadn't he? Dragging a slightly trembling hand down his face, Jerry huffed in a deep breath and closed his eyes briefly. "Do you know what they wanted?" he forced his voice to be steady. It wouldn't do freaking out in front of his kid brother.

"They wanted..." Tom seemed to get lost in some wintery hesitation, his eyes flickering around the room in speckled paranoia. "They wanted _me," _he swallowed once, eyes wide.

"OK. OK. Don't worry- it's OK," Jerry said quietly but firmly, gripping one of Tom's shoulders in a tight grip and frowning in concern when the boy flinched back.

"No, Jerry. It's _not _OK. They had _guns!" _Tom's voice quavered, the tone to his words unnaturally vulnerable- he'd only seen a side of this Tom when he'd admitted to being bullied at school- which was another reason why Jerry liked Alex. He'd saved his brother- and so who cared whether he was a superspy who saved the world?- saving his brother was a big enough thing for him.

But that was it.

Jerry leaned back, sitting on his heels as he examined Tom.

Ever since Tom had been shot in the arm, he'd never been able to get over guns. Just the thought of one was enough to send him into a cold sweat and mild panic.

But being surrounded by them today- that probably was hard on his already damaged psyche.

So really, the timing of the doorbell to ring wasn't the best.

Tom's eyes snapped to the clock on the wall.

10 o'clock.

Oh, damn.

* * *

...Really, Alex decided hazily, spitting out more blood that just ended up dribbling down his chin- he just was incredibly unlucky today.

"It seems like we got lucky today," one of the men smiled- the one wrenching his hair. Just in case Alex forgot that fact anytime soon, he gave the blond head another sharp pull, eliciting a cry of pain from the boys bruised and cut lips.

"Odd," another one spoke, his voice soft. "I didn't think that you'd be as foolish as to seperate yourself from any form of defense or safety...truth be told, the fact that you did is rather...disappointing."

Alex could only croak an unintelligible reply as another fist decided to introduce itself to his friendly stomach which apparently seemed to be _asking _for new friends.

"No matter. Our rules if we were to find you haven't changed,"

"What do you want?" Alex managed to gasp out, keeping his eyes hard as they spun round through the dimness of the room, trying to seek out eyes.

But the lighting conjured shadows to shelter their eyes, and all that Alex could make out was the slight twitching of lips into a dusty smile. "It's not what we want, Rider," the voice came from somewhere to his left and reactively, Alex made to try and catch just where the voice came from, crying out as the hand holding his hair forced him back. "What we _want_ is not necessary to us getting the job done. We only do what we're told,"

"Like dogs," Alex spat, wheezing due to the pain in his body. "Mangy dogs,"

There was a pause and Alex held his breath, readying himself for one final grab at life.

"I'm getting bored now," the voice was suddenly cold, and Alex had to force himself not to shrink back from it. "You know what to do. Go and get the stuff," he wasn't talking to Alex.

"'Stuff'?" Alex growled at the voice. "What 'stuff'?" and he wasn't scared, he wasn't scared, he wasn't- "What?" he snapped.

The man repeated what he was saying with an almost friendly pat to his face if it didn't snap his head to the side and make Alex moan in pain. "Listen when I'm talking. I said: do you know what makes an enemy strong?"

"How many clichés they can spit in one second?" Alex answered automatically, his brain trying to work out how to _escape._

Another 'friendly' slap.

Alex gasped into the stuffy _(he couldn't breathe!) _air, his vision spinning, ears ringing as the deceptively soft but violent voice held his wavering attention. "No, Alex. What makes an enemy strong is them knowing your greatest weakness- your greatest fear." a rough hand grabbed his chin, forcing Alex's face to stare into suddenly shadow-less eyes. The eyes stared back into his own, a burning danger rushing through them. "We know _yours," _he hissed, a grin tugging his mouth upwards and exposing his teeth.

Alex sucked in a painful breath as the man's hot breath swept over him. "You've discovered my greatest terror of people who don't floss or brush. Please. Save me-" he let out a hoarse yell as once again his head was wrenched to the side, a fist hitting him heavily in the mouth.

The man straightened up, looking disdainfully down at the softly groaning teen who attempted to rid his mouth of the sudden rush of blood that had filled his mouth. "Your insults will be wasted when you're very much dead, Alex. I know your fear. I know it, and now, I'm going to use it against you,"

Alex could hardly think straight, attempting to ignore the blood that _(was as red as Jack's hair, as bright as Jack's hair, as painful as Jack's hair, as blinding as-) _pooled in his mouth. He would black out soon if he wasn't careful. And he couldn't afford that- not when he needed so badly to escape. He _needed _to escape!

A soft _clinking _sound alerted him, and he groggily raised his head up, swallowing down the urge to vomit at the movement.

"Know what this is, Alex?"

Alex stared at the bottles of whiskey in the hand that was raised in front of him. "Orange juice?" he managed to get out, voice hoarse.

"Whiskey. Pure whiskey. Do you know how much alcohol percentage whiskey has in it?"

Alex did in fact know, but he decided not to answer.

"40%- it can be more. This, in fact," a hand ran down the bottle almost fondly- "has 43% alcohol in it. That's quite a bit,"

Alex managed a frown. "That's all very well and-"

"I thought I told you that I knew what your greatest fear was," the voice cut in smoothly.

What?

Alex forced his eyes to focus on the voice and the bottle that shone hypnotically and lazily in the slight darkness.

Alcohol?

Greatest fear?

But he wasn't-

It hit him.

A soft whine escaped his lips and slowly, he pushed himself back into the chair, eyes pinned on the bottles of whiskey.

No oh no oh no oh no oh no...

"I see you've worked it out." the voice seemed to smile at him, soft chuckles reverberating around him. But Alex's eyes were focussed only on the bottles. "Loss of control, Alex. That's your greatest fear,"

"Ah..." Alex pushed further away from the swaying bottles, his breaths jerking in his chest.

"Get the boy a drink,"

* * *

"Hello! We're here to-"

"Get Alex? Yeah, sure, come in!" Jerry ushered the men in, not even perturbed by the mass of muscle that the four men carried, neither the fact that there were four of them when there first was one. He locked the door behind him and grinned at the soldiers. When it came to Alex, you just learnt to accept things as they came.

"Tea anyone?"

"Yes please," "No."

Eagle and Snake glared at Fox and Wolf who shook their heads.

"No, thanks." Wolf said loudly, shooting Snake and Eagle an irritated glare. They didn't have _time _for tea! "We just came to pick up Alex,"

"Ah, Alex," Jerry paused and then shrugged. Tom would figure out what was going on. "Go and sit down in the living room." he ordered, gesturing with a skinny arm towards the room. "Tom just vanished upstairs, I'll go and get him,"

Nodding, wondering what the world was coming to to being ordered around by a scrawny barely-out-of-their-teens kid, they obediently kicked off their shoes and tramped into the cosy and lived in living room.

"I said 10," Wolf growled as he sat stiffly in the sofa, elbowing one of Fox's arms out of the way. "When I say 10, I mean 10."

Fox scowled, and retaliated the elbowing through 'accidentally' kicking Wolf's leg. "He's a teenager. He'll try and soak up as much time as he can up with his friend,"

"This is _Cub, _we're talking about," Eagle interrupted, pulling a face when Snake told him to get his feet off of the coffee table, obeying grudgingly. "I can't imagine Cub doing that,"

"So what?" Snake folded his arms. "What're you trying to say?"  
"Nothing! Man," he muttered. "I was only _saying _that I don't think Cub would do that,"

"Do what?" Fox cut in harshly.

"What?" Eagle asked blankly.

"Oh," Fox blinked. "You know, do what you said,"

Eagle stared at Fox in bewilderment. "Which was...?"

"You know," Snake gestured with his hands. "That thing."

"Huh?"

"The thing that you-"

"Will you shut up!" Wolf snapped, his eyes glancing at his watch again. It was _5 past_10 now. Was Cub having a _laugh?! _"I _knew _you should've all stayed at home and watched that cooking programme!"

"We _weren't _watching it! It just happened to be on!" Fox defended them all, Snake and Eagle nodding eagerly.

"Well isn't that just-" Wolf's sarcastic drawl was cut off as a figure entered the room.

Not Cub.

Tom.

And another kid.

And he was acting shifty.

A lull of tense silence passed.

"Who're you guys?" the other boy- the one K-Unit didn't know finally blurted out, breaking the mounting silence.

Four pairs of eyes swivelled onto him, and he shrank back- suddenly wishing that he hadn't spoken up.

"Where's Alex, Tom?" Snake said softly, choosing to ignore the question.

The four pairs of eyes took in the way the teens fingers drummed (anxiously) against his thighs his head (an anxious tic) twitching every now and then. "Al? Uh, he's still-" the lie withered on his lips as he took in the gazes of K-Unit.

They didn't believe a word he was saying.

"Where's Alex, Tom?" Eagle repeated, his voice light but edged with steel.

Tom flinched back from the voice, almost stumbling into Ryan who was gaping at the men with wide eyes and a half hanging open mouth.

Where _was _Alex?

_"And if I don't turn up and it's obvious that I won't, tell my guardians that I'll meet them at home,"_

The voice rang through Tom's head.

Alex was clever.

Alex was strong.

Alex was brave.

Alex was not a superhuman.

If he wasn't back by a time that he said he would be back by, it meant that something had gone wrong.

"He said he'd meet you at home," Tom backed up at the looks that passed over the men's faces.

They looked thunderous.

"_What?"_

* * *

"Come on. Another one. Don't be shy,"

Alex moaned and tried to twist his head away from the persistent hand that pushed the glass nearer to his mouth.

"Come on..."

His eyes stung as his chin was grasped forcefully, another hand wrenching his mouth open.

His scream was muffled as the burning liquid tipped _yet again _into his mouth. Once again, he tried to spit it out, tried to tip it out of his mouth through bucking and heaving against his restraints but yet again, a hand pinched his nostrils shut and he was forced to swallow, choking and coughing, his ears popping.

"Good boy," the voice purred.

His insides hurt.

How long would it take for his liver to swell?

How many more glasses?

This had to have been his-

Fifth?

Ninth?

No...he was, he was losing track of how many glasses of fire filled liquid they'd forced down his throat.

He was-

_Oh._

He was going to be _sick._

Doubling over, Alex's stomach clenched and heaved, vomitting up putrid stomach acid, tears rolling down his face from the strain and spasms of his now empty stomach, dry heaving with nothing to come up.

"Do you know how many youths die from alcohol in a year, Alex?" Alex's ears twitched as he picked up the sound of yet another glass being poured for him.

"No more," his words were hardly coherent even to his ears as he still leaned doubled over in his seat, stomach still clenching. "_Please," _he moaned, sucking in a steadying breath as colours that shouldn't be there swam around him. "No more,"

"5,000," was the casual reply, the _clink _of the glass settling on a countertop suddenly loud in Alex's ears. "Just think, Rider. You'll be added to that number,"

"No. No more." he couldn't control the words that slipped out of his mouth.

And it terrified him.

He began to writhe and twist as hands hauled him up again.

"Come now. I thought you youths _revelled _in underage drinking?"

"_No!" _he tipped his head back, hoping to headbutt whoever was behind him, but his limbs weren't following his brain, and all he managed to do was swing his head round to the side.

"Don't be silly, Rider. Drink up,"

He thrashed as the glass poured the liquid straight into his mouth again, dribbling down his chin and onto his shirt. Retching, Alex's head throbbed, his sides screaming as he twisted to try and throw up again but never did as another glass was tipped straight down his throat again.

Choking, , body wracked with uncontrollable _(he wasn't in control! He wasn't in __**control!**__) _spasms, he felt his vision blurring out, teeth chattering.

Warm blood filled his mouth once again and he felt bile rise up in his throat at the clashing of the tastes in his mouth.

A hand pried his mouth open, and unbidden, a scream tried to break loose before a hand clamped over his mouth as he shook his head wildly. _NO more! NO MORE!_

"He bit his tongue,"

"Keep his mouth open,"

"Are you giving him anymore?"  
Alex moaned into the hand, body still twitching, vomit rushing up to his throat. Suddenly, he was choking on the vile liquid, his body still shuddering.

"What's going on now?"

"He's choking on his vomit. Quick, lean him over!"

Alex coughed out the liquid as his head was forced down, shuddering as the remaining whisky was thrown over him- the smell was making him feel nauseous.

The voices seemed to merge and whine around him as he gasped into his knees, his brain not allowing him to listen in properly to what they were saying. "No more. No more. No more." he muttered into his legs, the words slurred over each other and causing pangs of pain to strike through his head.

The feeling of two hands on his shoulders caused his instincts to scream at him, but the noise of them only made him dribble bile onto the floor again, coughing it up and near sobbing into his chokes.

Alex couldn't even remember how he found himself in the back of a car, voices washing over him, sharp laughs drilling through his head as he mumbled indecipherable things to the voices around him, his brain desperately trying to control his limbs but his limbs stubbornly doing their own thing.

Alex's eyes blinked open as a hand smacked him roughly across the face, jolting him awake and making him wonder just when he'd fallen into unconsciousness.

"We're here," was the rough and distorted growl.

Alex stumbled as arms heaved him up, ignoring his faint cries of slurred complaint.

The sudden rush of wind on his face shocked him enough to take him momentarily out of his drunken haze.

Alex stared down at the passing cars below him.

He was stood on a very high, very thin wall above a motorway.

He swayed on his feet- suddenly again feeling very sick.

Hands pushed him onto the ledge again, and he forced himself to concentrate to the voice was spoke to him, hugging his shoulders as he suddenly felt very cold.

"Well, this is where we say goodbye, I suppose, Rider," the voice was coming from everywhere at once. He tried to push down the burning in his stomach as he became captivated by the many swirling and flashing colours below him. "'Drunk Teenager Dies from Stupid Stunt'- sounds pretty good to me. It's a shame you won't be able to see the headline after you're dead. Don't worry, we'll find your grave and deliver it to you when whatever is left of you gets buried,"

Alex forced his clumsy mouth to move, his brain sluggishly working- concentrating now on keeping his body alive. Did he have alcohol poisoning? "W-whhyy?" he managed to murmur, the rushing wind tugging at his clothes and inviting him to dance.

"Simple, Rider. We're not here to get caught. We're here to kill you. You were at a party. You got drunk. You did something stupid. You died. A typical story that no one will look too close into. You set the evidence for your death up yourself, Alex. Should've stayed at home,"

Another tug of wind made Alex crouch down, his survival instincts getting ready for the hardest fight of the year.

Not only would he have to fight against the wind and the inevitable fall that came along with it, but he'd also have to fight with his _own _body.

Alex waited until he couldn't hear the men any longer before moving a tentative foot forward.

Foot didn't want to be tentative.

For one terrifying moment, Alex was sure he as going to fall.

His foot flew out wider than he'd wanted it and landed on nothing but air.

Panic made him drop to his knees, the appendage's slamming into the brick as his hands scrambled at the dangerously thin surface.

Gasping, dragging in panicked breaths, Alex stared blurrily at the wall and wondered why it was swaying like that.

It looked like a snake.

A bubble of a giggle burst from his lips before he could swallow the noise down.

Hands gripping tighter into the wall, he tried to clamp down on the shudders that threatened to overwhelm his body once again. Swiping a tongue across his battered lips, Alex tried again, reaching out for the wall-

That wasn't there.

Blankly, Alex stared at his hand and where the wall _should have been._

Another laugh fell from his lips.

But the laugh didn't quite match up to the fear in his eyes.

Or the trembles in his limbs.

The cars buzzed and flew harshly beneath him.

He fluttered his eyes closed briefly, the wind tossing his hair around and impatiently urging him to play.

He wished he'd followed K-Unit's orders.

* * *

"What do you _mean _he said meet us back at home?" Wolf snapped, not caring that it probably wasn't Tom's fault that Alex had decided upon this. That _idiot kid! _Why couldn't he _think about his own safety for once?_

Tom looked away from the burning glare and focussed his attention on Wall.

Wall was friendly.

Wall never offered opinions.

Wall was neutral ground.

"That's what he said," he snapped, and Wall didn't mind that he was snapping. He felt some bravery returning. "He just said that he'd meet you at home!"

"When did he say that? When did he leave?" Eagle demanded, cutting past Wolf's angry retort with his own cutting voice.

Tom hesitated.

Fox immediately pounced on the hesitation. "Tom," he kept his voice low but dangerous. "Don't bother lying to us. If Alex is in danger, then we need to know where he is."

Tom swallowed, glancing at Wall for support.

Wall shrugged. _Can't help you here, mate._

Glaring at Wall's uselessness, he forced himself to look at Alex's (odd) guardians, reminding himself again and again that it _wasn't his fault _that Alex wasn't there. "He said that...I mean...we went to a party-"

Wolf spat out a sharp curse, wrenching his head to the side to glare burningly at Wall's accomplice and best friend- Floor. Eagle jerked back as if physically struck, Snake hissed something under his breath and Fox's face hardened, mouth twisting down into a sharp curve.

Words died on Tom's lips as fear filled him at the sight of their expressions. Lamely, he stared at them all, Ryan moving a little closer to Tom for support.

"He went to the party." Fox's voice was ice itself.

Tom's throat bobbed as he attempted to swallow. "Yeah," he croaked. "I-I told him not to, but when Alex wants something..." he swallowed again, roughly.

"Yeah. We know," Snake's voice was liquid fire.

"He _promised,_" Eagle's voice seemed to be tipping on a dangerous mix of disappointed and furious.

Wolf stood up jerkily, stiffly, nodding once to the two teens who had moved back at the sudden straightening of the man. "Thank you for letting us in," he turned to his unit. "Stand up," he barked. "We're going home." turning to Snake, he pointed a finger at him. "Phone him." and with that, the four men strode to the door, faces like thunder as Tom scrambled to unlock the door for them, sending Alex a quick prayer and feeling guiltily glad that he wasn't Alex at the moment when he finally got home.

_If he gets home, _a voice whispered.

"Shut up," he snapped out loud to himself, ignoring Ryan's weird look.

Of course Alex would get home.

He always came home.

* * *

Slowly, surely, Alex shuffled forward yet again.

It was small progress, but it was progress.

His hands were freezing, teeth chattering.

He had to move faster. If he didn't get down soon, he'd black out- he could feel the darkness tinging the edge of his vision already.

Ignoring the way his stomach clenched as he grasped at thin air again, Alex forced himself to keep moving, trying to concentrate on the path ahead of him- nothing else.

_"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, and all the King's horses and all the King's men, couldn't put Humpty together again! Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall-"_

Alex froze as the song rang through his air.

His pocket was vibrating.

His phone.

_"-couldn't put Humpty-"_

They'd changed his ringtone?

That was just...sick.

Bur oddly hilarious.

Laughter that wasn't quite his own fell from his lips as his mind struggled to reel the neon noises back into whatever warped world they came from. Gasping into his laughter, near crying, he swiped a hand towards his phone, clumsy fingers pulling it out-

And dropping it over the wall.

Detachedly, he watched the phone fall, fall, fall.

And _that _was funny too.

Near crying with laughter now, (his sides _stinging, aching, burning_) Alex gripped at the wall with rough fingers, his eyes scrunched in mixed agony and twisted mirth.

He whooped in laughter even more as he slipped over the wall, just managing to catch himself at the last minute.

Suddenly, clinging there, colours swaying and crooning at him, it wasn't so funny any more.

Groaning, Alex forced his muscles to _pushheavelift _himself up and over the wall, gasping into his breaths as his stubborn limbs gave him a little leeway, enabling him to finally clamber back onto the wall.

"'most died," he mumbled through cold lips, his head pounding, breaths rasping painfully out of his alcohol burnt throat. Coughing rapidly into his shoulder, Alex grimaced as another wave of nausea hit him and he swayed, desperately clinging onto the thin wall.

"Move," he muttered, letters clumsily bumping into each other as they drunkenly tried to decide where to fit.

"Move," he muttered again, his phone already forgotten in the bruised and drunken depth of his mind. "_Moooovvvee,"_

_Sounds like a cow, _he sniggered to himself as he clawed forward once, twice, thrice.

"Mooo," he mimicked, eyes fluttering, suddenly heavy. "_Mooo," _he repeated, chuckles finding their way into the animal noise as he doggedly crept forward, having to remind himself every now and then of just why he was moving _(mooing) _forward.

Forward, forward, forward, forward-

"Feel like _ice-cream,_" he mumbled, stopping momentarily and staring hazily at the wall in front of him.

_Move, _something hissed inside of him.

A grin stretched slowly across his face as he struggled with his fighting limbs to _keep crawling forward._

"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming," he mumbled, and then laughed out loud as the words came out sloppily from his mouth, sounding more like-

Sleepy. He was sleepy.

Where was Jack? Where was-

He stopped on the wall, mouth half open, staring at the space in front of him.

Where was Jack?

Panic flooded through him.

Where was-

_Chocolate cake. Feel like chocolate cake, _he hummed thoughtfully to himself, peering down below at the cars zipping below him.

_Look like lollipops. _He decided thoughtfully. Twisting his lips into a childish frown, wobbling, he leaned forward to get a better-

_Keep moving. Keep mooing._

_ As free as a bird, as free as a kite._

Alex moved forward again, his brain desperately trying to overrule his intoxicated thoughts.

_Poisoned._

* * *

"Well?"

"It's not even ringing."

"Voicemail?"

"No."

Wolf slapped a hand to his forehead and growled, digging his fingers into the sides of his head. "What is that kid _playing at?_" worry clearly tinted his words in purpling clarity. Tossing his head to the side to glare at the clock (midnight. It was _midnight_) he let out another muttered curse.

"We should be out there searching," Eagle paced the carpetted floor, his face set in a grim expression.

"Searching where?" Fox shot back from his position against the wall.

Eagle tightened his mouth into one thin line.

"We have to wait here." Snake despised having to say the words- he too wanted to be out roaming the streets. And when he found Cub...his jaw clenched, eyes burning. Cub would find out just _why _you don't disobey orders given from _them. _"He _said _he'd meet us back here,"

"He also _said _that he wouldn't go to the party," Eagle threw back vehemently, his fists clenching by his sides.

Snake glared at Eagle until he stopped pacing and flopped with an angry yell into the sofa, throwing an arm over his thunderous face. "What good would it be if we were to go and drive around the place searching for him and he comes back here and we're gone?" he carried on, forcing his voice to remain soft and low- which was somehow more frightening than when he'd had his voice loud and sharp.

"Why don't two of us go out looking and then-"

Wolf cut off Fox's suggestion. "And look _where?" _in frustration, he slammed his fist into the armrest of the chair. "We can't go chasing every street corner. If the kid doesn't find his way back in an hour, then we call MI6."

Silence met those words.

Fox glanced at Snake apprehensively, Eagle still had his arm over his eyes, refusing to talk to any of them as he stewed in his anger. "MI6?" Fox asked slowly, his brows lowered in an expression of wariness. "Are you sure that's a good idea? If MI6 find him then..."

"Then what?" Wolf snapped.

Fox bared his teeth at his ex-(but still kind of) leader. "You _know _they're like," he hissed, leaning forward over the chair, his hands pressing into the armrests. "They're _dangerous. _When they said that they'd sort Cub out if he ever did anything out of line, they didn't sound very _friendly now, _did they?"

Wolf clenched his teeth and purposefully looked away from Fox's smouldering glare. "At this moment in time, that can wait." he dragged in a slow breath, letting the oxygen calm his thumping heart. "All that matters now is getting Cub home."

Snake stared at his hands and forced them to unclench.

Exhaling deeply, Snake looked at Fox and Eagle. "So," he murmured. "An hour."

Wolf looked at him sharply and then nodded, turning back to the clock. "An hour."

* * *

Where had the wall gone?

Dizzily, Alex stared at the steps end of the wall that sloped downwards towards the ground- a grassy part covered in shrubs and litter from lazy people.

Frowning, barely aware of the sickness in his stomach now, he moved awkwardly towards where the wall ended, intent on finding out where the wall had-

Surprised, Alex blinked his eyes open, staring at the grass that was suddenly right beneath him.

The _sky had moved and turned into grass!_

Fascinated, Alex felt the green sky with his fingertips, wincing when the move sent spasms of intense pain down his head and arm.

Moaning as knives dug into his head and arms, he twisted his head round and endeavoured to rid his stomach of whatever was causing him that immense sickness.

Nothing came up other than bile.

Collapsing back onto the green sky (tickled like feathers and chickens and-) he panted out puffs of pained air, feverish eyes swinging round the black vicinity.

It was _dark._

"D_ark_," he whispered, words limping out into the air.

_Stand up!_

Grunting, listening to the shouting _(why was it _screeeaaming? _He _hated _it when they screamed) _voice that bellowed in his head, Alex struggled up and onto his knees, finally tottering onto both feet and swaying.

When he found himself suddenly on a road, he swung his head around in confusion.

How had he got there?

**_Danger. Status extremely low- maneuverability percentage- 13%_**

****Screwing up his face, he groaned into his hands.

He must've been walking on autopilot- half blacked out as he stumbled-

Wherever he was.

Needed a... needed a _street sign._

Humming vaguely to himself, a song that somehow made his eyes well up, Alex stumbled towards a street sign that waved arms at him, calling him-

Straight into the middle of the road.

A screeching beep burst into the night air.

Alex's head swung to the side-

Lights slammed into his wide eyes-

Mouth open-

**_MOVE!  
_**Even his drunken limbs couldn't refuse such a brutal screech like that.

His body flung to the side, arms wrapping round his head as the car screamed past him, swinging wildly to the left.

Heart thudding in his chest, eyes still wide open, Alex stared at the ground that lay beside him, his fingers curling against the cold tarmac, listening as he heard a door slam open and hurried footsteps approach him.

His breath wheezed in his chest as he was rolled over, black tinging his vision with edges of brighter flashes of colour. Eyes blurring- hardly able to discern shapes and figures and colours, Alex tried to focus them onto the figure looming over him. The words he wanted to say refused to come out as anything other than a mindless gurgle.

"Oh please, oh please, are you OK?"

Breaths were painful to heave into his abused lungs and he coughed once, his vision darkening again. Mentally, he cursed. He was going to have a blackout again.

Hair brushed across his face as the figure leaned over further, and Alex caught the vibrant colour red flashing in his eyes.

Red.

"What's happened to you? Oh please-"

The voice seemed to blur and Alex's brain stopped connecting for a while, the hair that brushed against him soothing him, smelling lightly of flowers and strawberries- an oddly _(no. No.) _familiar scent that smelt rather-

Detachedly, Alex watched a butterfly settle on the persons head, watching the wingtips move gently in sweeping arches, scattering sparks of blinding gold and white. His fingers twitched against the tarmac as he attempted to reach out and capture it in his hands; hold it tight and send it away. He blinked as some gold dust fell into his eyes, making them sting and water and-

Hands ran down his face _(gentle, warm, loving) _and Alex heard a sharp intake of breath. "A-Alex?"

A gentle voice, musical like chimes in the wind.

Alex watched the butterfly morph into a star that gradually flooded his whole vision white.

He knew his mind was poisoned with alcohol because for a second there-

_(One painful, gossamer moment)_

-no.

There was no point thinking about it.

His vision flooded black.

* * *

This was more than just luck.

Struggling to concentrate, Alex forced his sluggish mind to take in the sight of _home _that stood in front of him.

Home.

How had he-

Swaying, Alex blindly reached out for the tree that was further away than he'd anticipated.

Moaning, whining softly to himself, he thought back to-

_Vroom! Vroom! There had been a car that was-_

Staggering forward, Alex made his way to the door.

A, B or C.

Hands on his hips, face tilted to one side, Alex eenie-minie-moed the three doors.

C seemed to be _(it rhymed!) _the right choice! The right choice therightchoicethesohealkedtothedoorand-

Wailing softly, Alex clutched at his head because it had _hurt _walking into the wall where the door _should have been _and now it had moved to the side and the side and the-

How had he _gotten there?_

Slapping his hand to his pocket, thinking about tickling hair and cars that went _vroom! _Alex dragged out his keys and slammed them into the-

Wall.

Why did the door keep _moving? _Frowning, scrubbing blood from his head and wondering why it was so _red-_

_ (Tickling hair)_

He tried again to slot the keys into the door with fumbling fingers.

He cheered when they finally slipped into the door.

Whooping, Alex twisted the handle, leaning against the door and watched as itswunginlikethislikethis and-

"What time do you call _this?"  
_Alex jerked back from the sudden voice and dropped into a savage but terrible karate form, arms outward, right foot pushed back.

Wolf dropped his eyes down the darkened form of Alex, unable to see him properly in the early morning darkness. Disgust alight in his eyes, he took in the kids weak karate pose and narrowed his eyes, Snake, Eagle and Fox lurking in the unlit hallway with folded arms and cold eyes. "Get in." his voice was low and deadly as he grabbed Alex's arm and shoved him into the room.

A strong odour of alcohol hit his nose and he recoiled from it.

K-Unit stood straighter, eyes sharp.

"Have you been _drinking?" _Fox demanded, his voice heavy with repulse.

Alex wandered into a wall, mumbling apologies to it as he struggled (for some reason) with his shirt.

K-Unit watched him stumble around with piercing eyes.

Fox took a step forward, his face utterly furious, eyes rolling with deep and black tides of fury. "I thought we _told you," _he gripped Alex's arm and reached for the light, leaning in closer to drill this into the kids alcohol blinded mind. Near _snarling, _Fox tugged the teen closer. "_Not to drink anything?" _he slapped the light on with a vicious swipe.

Alex immediately flinched back from the lights, clapping both hands over his eyes and crying out at the sudden light.

K-Unit stared.

And stared.

Snake swore under his breath.

* * *

**AN- Well. There you have it! Sorry for the wait- exams and all that jazz! I hope you liiikkkee it! Please do leave me a review- and the plot comes to light...**

**NEXT CHAPTER! Ha! Let's find out ****_just _****what happened in America- guys!**

**Review! (It might make me get it out quicker...*wink wink*)**


	10. Chapter 10

**AN- *just smiles***

* * *

"Eagle, go and get the first aid kit. Now," Wolf's voice was eerily calm, his eyes never leaving Alex. "Fox, go and get a glass of water for Cub. Snake," his finger moved to point at the pale-blond Scotsman who seemed to be having trouble vocalizing his feelings beyond sharp hisses under his breath. "Help me lead him into the living room,"

No one argued as they ran quickly to do their jobs.

Moving slowly towards Alex, Wolf placed a hand on the teens arm, trying to ignore the guilt he felt when two brown eyes peered unfocussed back up at him. If he just hadn't _listened _to the kid...

"You weren't to know," Snake muttered as he led Cub into the room, one of his own hands firmly on Alex's shoulder. Blue eyes glanced piercingly back up at him. "Don't blame yourself. We're a team- we work as one unit. Your decision is our decision at the end of the day." Snake tried to snap Wolf out of his stupor, placing one hand on Alex's arm and guiding the stumbling teen into the living room (it was almost the room where _everything _happened now. Meetings with angry Agents, Alex's first laugh, Tom's appearance- and now _this.) _his hand steadying, firm and gentle all in one.

Wolf glanced sharply at Snake and then nodded once shortly, turning to bark out orders to his men.

Alex gazed around him. The urgent voices were somewhat soothing to him, so when the man to his right who trailed a shimmering turquoise light _(calm and clarity of the mind of the mind) _gripped his arm and began leading him through the twisting and swaying room, he didn't protest.

"'We goin'?" Alex's voice was horribly slurred as he tilted his head awkwardly everywhere, eyes wide as if he hadn't been in the room before.

Snake quenched the beginnings of mixed _rageandterroranddisappointment _down in his gut, forcing his lips to smile at Alex. "Just into the living room, Cub."

Alex blinked as an arm _(Snake) _led him carefully into the sitting room (and they walked through a _wall _because he _knew _that the door wasn't _there!_) speaking in a low voice things that Alex's desperate mind couldn't seem to catch hold of for any longer than a few seconds.

A frustrated voice near screamed in his head, pounding at the immaterial walls angrily. _You are so _useless!

And Alex _flinched _because he _hated _that word.

Wolf and Snake stopped leading Cub to a sofa as the teen halted suddenly, his face drawing in on itself like someone had said something nasty to him, his blurry eyes doing some odd squinting thing, his hands dropping to his shirt again as his lips seemed to screw up and open slightly- as if he was holding back a cry.

Snake, keeping his voice soft and moving closer to Cub (ignoring the smell of liquor and vomit and dirt on him because that's what you _do _when someone as precious as Cub gets hurt) he tried to make Cub's unfocussed eyes look up at him. "You OK?"

Cub seemed to blink at him owlishly, the look gone from his face before he nodded once, muttered something unintelligible and then made to sit on the sofa- not accounting for his double vision.

Snake's eyes went wide as Cub missed the sofa and ended up smacking his forehead against the coffee table as he fell down, letting out a small cry as he did, causing Fox to hurry into the room, uncaring of the water he was splashing over himself as he dropped down next to Cub.

Wolf and Snake were immediately by his side, pushing him back to lean against the sofa where he sat with his hand clutched dazedly over what would be a pretty bump in the morning, gaping at nothing that they could see.

"What happened?" Fox asked worriedly, sitting down on the floor next to Alex whilst Wolf knelt in front of them, Snake prying Cub's hands from off of his forehead.

"He smacked his head on the coffee table." Snake explained briskly, and then pressed his cool fingers against where Cub was still trying to clutch on his forehead. It looked red.

The sound of Eagle returning with their heavy military style first aid kit distracted them, and Cub took to staring at the large box instead of whimpering over his forehead. Eagle stared down at Alex for a while, shaking his head and dropping the box next to Snake and immediately sitting in front of Cub next to Wolf, his face pale and teeth gnawing on his thumb. "Is he going to be OK?"

Snake grunted and glanced at Eagle sharply, trying his best to quench his own rise of worry over the kid. "He'll be fine," his voice was tight though, and he knew he needed to calm down. Anxiety would rub off on Cub and with him as drunk as he was, he didn't know how he'd react. "I don't know how much he drank, though. Cub," he barked, tapping an unbruised section of Cub's face and drawing his attention. "How much did you drink?"

Cub stared blankly at him for a moment and then shrugged, eyes wandering before another tap returned his grudging attention. "Di'n drink _anything," _he said, wide-eyed.

Harshly, Snake gave his arm a little shake, trying to break him free from his intoxication if only for a while. "How _many?_And of _what?"_

Snake glared as Cub frowned at him, finally relenting and letting out a huge and melodramatic sigh. "Lost count. Whiskey," he finally grumbled, looking away and playing with bits of carpet.

Cold washed over them all.

He lost _count?_

Hazily, Alex stared up into the concerned eyes of Fox as he was tugged back to lean against the back of the sofa. He frowned as the hands dropped away. They'd been comforting. Grumbling, Alex twisted around stubbornly and buried his face in Fox's shoulder, letting the bright colour blue _(trust) _wash over him.

Confused, Fox stared as Alex nestled his head into his shoulder, golden hair spilling over tickling his chin. "Cub?" he questioned softly as the boy wrapped awkward and clumsy arms around him. "You OK?"  
No response could be heard.

"Some people take drunkeness differently." Eagle put in in a subdued tone. His face was pale, his legs raised to his chest and fingers drumming against them in an anxious staccato. "What was Cub _thinking?" _he whispered, watching as Cub's arms fell and he wrestled them back up again.

"Don't jump to conclusions," Snake ordered, though he had to quickly swipe away some of the conclusions he had made, so saying. "Don't let him fall asleep," he said sharply to Fox as he noticed Cub with his face hidden in his shoulder as he reached out and pulled the first aid kit towards him- it had been given to them by MI6. He'd been through their large military style first aid kit before already to check everything was included (it was) and so he knew exactly where to look should he need it...but the sight of all the strong tablets and syringes still worried him. Like now; he pulled up an orange capsule bottle and wondered over it- why would they need such strong painkillers? "The alcohol percentage goes up in your bloodstream when you fall asleep. We need him to keep awake for a while before he can sleep." There. He pulled out the things he was looking for- antiseptic, bandages and cotton swabs. "Can you hold him up?" he directed to Fox.

Nodding, Fox nudged Cub who was still clinging to him. "Come on, Cub. You need to sit up so you can have those cuts looked at."

"_Nooo,_" Cub struggled as he was pried away from Fox and set back against the sofa to face Snake.

Wolf hissed as he took in Alex's face covered in cuts and bruises. "Who would do something likethat to a kid?" his hands clenched at the mere thought of it. The thought of Cub fighting-

-and him being nowhere to stop it.

He closed his eyes tight, fingers pinching the crease that his lowered brow had made.

_Why _had he listened to Cub?  
Snake shot a glance at Wolf, his lips pursing, noticing that Wolf was still feeling guilty. That would have to wait for the time being, though. "Water, Fox. Give me the water," he waved a hand at where Fox sat by Cub's left, and grasped the water, noting the way Cub's eyes hazily tried to pin the movement, his hand swaying and flapping at the glass. Snake's eyes darkened. With every passing moment when he watched Cub, it was becoming increasingly more obvious that he had alcohol poisoning. What had happened?

Eagle didn't like seeing Cub like that. "Give him the water," Eagles voice was quiet- decietfully calm.

Nodding stiffly, Snake picked up the glass of water- there was no way Cub was going to be able to without smashing it into his teeth. "Drink up, Cub," he ordered, reaching out to hold Cub's chin whilst his other hand gently took the glass closer to Cub's mouth.

Cub's reaction was instantaneous.

One moment he was there chuckling to himself in glittery little bursts of laughter, and the next his eyes had snapped to the glass moving toward him, eyes suddenly going wide, mouth opening-

And he had howled.

Snake, in his shock almost dropped the water, Fox quickly leaning forward to grip Alex's squirming body, Eagle already trapping Cub's arms that flailed and attempted to hit Snake whilst Wolf near stood, readying to keep all of his unit members safe if it came to it.

"Cub! Calm down!" Fox near shouted over Cub's almost _hysterical _(and the _fear _in Cub's eyes was frightening) howling- like a wounded animal. "It's OK!" he held the teen tighter, his own heart thumping, swapping a bewildered look with Eagle.

"Move the glass!" Wolf called sharply over Cub's voice.

Swiftly, Snake pushed the glass right out of the way and out of Cub's sight, ignoring his buzzing questions for the time being.

"There, Cub? See? It's gone. It's OK now," Eagle soothed, Cub tossing his head to the side and muttering something in rapid and panicked babbles. "It's _OK,_" he kept his voice as soft as possible.

Gradually, the babbles faded away into small gasps of words before fading out completely, Cub's foggy brown eyes staring at nothing in particular.

"Cub?" Fox asked gently, letting go of his shoulders as the teens body finally went still.

Blinking, eyes oddly shiny, the teen struggled to sit upright, glowering at the carpet underneath him, his hands fisting in his lap, lips twisted into a painful grimace. "No," he near whispered, the word childish, floating out into the open like a yellow balloon.

"What was that about?" Wolf hissed to Snake who merely shook his head in frustration, watching as Cub seemed to shrink back away from them all, tugging at the carpet this time before edging closer to Fox and burying his face in his shoulder again.

Silence limped apologetically past.

"Don't let him go to sleep, Fox," Snake murmured the soft repetition carefully into the silence, reaching out and getting back to cleaning Cub's wounds again, tilting Cub's face out of Fox's shoulder so he could get to the nastier ones on his face.

Fox nodded and watched as Snake methodically worked on Cub, the rest of K-Unit's eyes glued onto the scene.

Ticking of the clock filled the silence and Eagle shuffled his legs closer to his chest, resting his head onto his knees as he watched, noticing the time was 1:54 in the morning after he caught sight of the digital watch on his wrist. "What does it look like, Snake?" he said in a low tone, unusually subdued as he waited for Snake to answer.

He didn't answer straight away, concentrating on cleaning the wounds and making sure Cub didn't drop to sleep. "It looks like he got into a fight of some sort," he began slowly, thoughtful of the words he used as he knew the effect that they could have. "Keep still," he said as Cub pulled back from his hand as he attempted to clean out a nasty cut on his eyebrow. Pursing his lips, Snake kept his eyes on his work- it grounded him; kept him aware of just what he needed to be focussing on- not going out there and kicking (whoever it was that hurt Cub) _backsides _into submission. "There are rope burns on his wrists, though," Snake gently lifted the floppy hand that belonged to Cub and pulled down the sleeve to show the raw marks against his skin. "He was probably struggling against whoever did it." he let the arm go down as Cub started wriggling again.

Wolf growled out a curse, Eagle's facial expression dropping to dark. "_Another _kidnapping?" he spat, his eyes roaring in fury. "_Damn it, _how do MI6 expect us to protect him from _anything _if we don't even know what the _hell _we're protecting him from?" savagely, Eagle hissed the words out, pulling his head back in anger.

"Maybe Cub can give us a clue," Fox suggested quietly. Snake glanced at him sharply. He looked tired, one hand resting against Cub's blond head, the other pressing into his forehead, his brows creased in an expression of weariness and-

Blame.

Fox was blaming himself for Cub's demise.

Before Snake could open his mouth to banish such creeping and whispering thoughts, Wolf cut in bitterly, jabbing one thumb at the near sleeping Cub, who was watching something he couldn't see with distant and unfocussed eyes.

"Cub? Tell us something?" Wolf snorted derisively, his arms folding tight against his chest as he scowled at no one in particular (mainly himself because he was such and _idiot _for believing Cub and getting the kid hurt), lip curled upwards. "Like _that?"_

As one, they all turned and gazed at Cub.

Sleepy eyes peered back, their acorn depths (worryingly) fuzzy and soft- _unguarded. _That was it. It was the first time that they had ever seen Cub unguarded.

Then...what was Cub trying to guard?

A thought snuck up in sunset hues into Snake's mind.

Immediately, he tugged violently away from the thought.

The thought persisted.

He hesitated.

Eyes moved to Cub who stared foggily back.

Snake caught the eyes of his other unit members.

He knew the same thought was luring them in.

Now, the only thing was, who would succumb to it first?

Nails biting into the palm of his hand, Snake leaned back tiredly into the back of the sofa, allowing the antisteptic to be placed onto the floor as he wondered. Here, Cub was sitting completely unguarded, his emotions let loose from their prison of finely crafted timber and iron wrought with steel and played harshly across his face in bleeding colours and sparks.

When Cub was sober again, they'd be back behind those heavy guards.

(But...he couldn't)

Why not...try and talk to them now?

(It's be like peeping at things he had no right to)

"Staring," Cub murmured against Fox's shoulder, his eyes drooping shut until Fox shook him.

Gultily, Snake tore his eyes away from the teen.

(He had no _right _to...)

The thought nudged him again.

(He really _couldn't..._)

Swallowing, pushing down feelings of guilt _(...could _he?_),_ Snake opened his mouth to ask a question that had been plaguing him for a while. "Cub," his voice was hoarse and he made to clear it. "Who was-"

"How's Tom?"

Snake glanced sharply at Eagle but the lanky man shook his head at him, mouthing _"take it __slow" _to him. Stiffly, Snake nodded.

For a moment, a spark of something clear and sharp entered into Cub's eyes- it was as if for a second there, he understood just what they were trying to do. But the look was very quickly lost beneath a swelling and confused fog of golden brown. "He's good," was the barely audible reply.

"Is he...your best friend?" Wolf probed slowly, carefully, wincing a little. He sounded like he was patronizing a 4 year old.

Luckily, Cub didn't seem to notice, and his head bobbed up and down in a resolute "yes". "Who's _your _best friend?" it took a moment for Wolf to decipher the chaotic scramble of words.

When he did, he frowned. "Well, my whole unit," he supplied grudgingly, knowing that Cub's stubborness persisted even through drunkeness. He ignored Eagle who wriggled his eyebrows at him, and Snake who wiped a mock tear from his eyes.

The answer seemed to baffled Cub. "_All _of them?" he slurred.

"Yeah."

Wolf watched as Cub thought long and hard about that, his brow crumpled, lips mouthing silent things. Finally, his head snapped up to look at him. "Me too?"

The question knocked Wolf momentarily, and his eyebrows shot up.

"Me _too?_" Cub insisted.

Snake chuckled softly, though Wolf thought the noise was strained, cleaning the rope burns around Cub's wrists. "You're not getting away easily with this."

Wolf shot a glare to Snake. He wasn't _good _at these emotional things. Rubbing at the back of his head, he shrugged. "Well, you are part of my unit, aren't you?" he returned shortly.

Cub gazed at him. "'s that a yes, then?"

Wolf ground his teeth. _"Yes,"_

"Oh." he paused, eyes wandering before trailing back up to Wolf's face. "T' what?"  
"To both of your questions."

Quietly, Cub stared at him for a moment. "What were they?"

"Oh, for _Pete's sake-"_

"Who did this to you, Alex?" Fox cut in swiftly.

Cub's head tipped back, flopping back onto his shoulder. "People- dunno."

Fox's jaw clenched at the dismissive reply. "Who. _Was _it?" he growled.

Cub glowered at him. "Don't. _Know."_

"How can you not know?" Fox snapped. "Look at me, Alex!" he barked as the teen closed his eyes mulishly against him.

"We're just worried about you, Cub," Eagle put in softly.

He mumbled something.

Eagle leaned in. "What?"  
Cub's eyes opened to glared clumsily at them all. Jabbing a finger at them, he scowled. "Don't _need _you." his hands suddenly clapped over both his ears, eyes wide and glaring. "Don't _need you!_" his voice was getting progressively louder, and he ignored their attempts to quiet him. "Don't _need you! _Why won't you _go 'way?_"

"Damn it, Cub! Calm down!" Wolf said growled sharply, as he began flapping at them, yelling, face red.

"_Go away!" _he shouted. "_Ian! Jaacck!" _he called.

K-Unit relaxed only slightly in relief as his panicked yells cut down a notch, Cub's head twisting from side to side.

"_Jack?" _they jumped as he shouted it again.

"Jack's not here, Cub," Eagle said calmly, though his fingers were twitching in anticipation against the carpet.

Alex stared around him in confusion.

"Ja-" the word died on his lips.

Where _was _she?

"Are you calm now? Or are you going to freak out again?" Snake asked slowly, trying to get a read on him through looking into Alex's clouded brown eyes. "Cub?"  
He hardly heard the lilac words, breaths bending and buckling in him like crushed silver. This wasn't right. It wasn't _right. _"Don't _touch me!" _he snapped as Snake's arm _(don't _leave _me) _tried to touch him arm. Regretfully, he watched the limb pull away-

-from him.

They always pulled away from him.

_Why?_

What was _wrong _with him?

He tried to focus in on them, tried to figure out what they were thinking, but the _damn alcohol _was clouding his vision, making it hard to see the tell-tale twitches in facial muscles that usually made it easy to see what someone was thinking. Scrubbing brutally at his eyes, he tried to peer at them again, squinting. But he _couldn't _read them.

And it terrified him.

A thought struck him- a rare thought through the haze of his own intoxicated state.

Is this what they felt like when they were trying to get a read on him?

Something sticky seemed to be making it hard for him to swallow properly. "I didn't _want _to go to the party."

The sudden whimper was shocking to say the least.

Where had that come from.

But Cub was gazing at them with decidedly wet eyes, his hands still loosely scrubbing at his eyes like he was-

"Didn't _want to," _the words were decidedly softer now, spoken like pastels against felt.

Wolf breathed in a deep breath, his eyes closing momentarily. "The point _is, _Cub, is that you purposefully lied to us. Even when you promised you wouldn't,"

"Didn't want to," the teen repeated miserably, picking at the carpet.

"But you did," Wolf said firmly. "And that makes it difficult for us," seeing Cub's uncomprehending look, Wolf elaborated, speaking clearly so that his alcohol blown mind would understand. "You lied, Cub. When you lie, it makes it hard for people to trust you." he lowered his voice, forcing his attention. "It makes it hard for us to believe we _are _friends," There. Simple. Spoken in a way that even _this _version of Cub would understand.

He did understand.

His face crumpled.

(_"Alex, it makes it hard for us- do you understand? No...we're not saying that...it just, makes it hard for us to _trust _you. We don't think we can do this anymore, Alex.")_

K-Unit jumped in shock as Cub's face literally crumbled right in front of them.

It wasn't sobbing-

-it wasn't anything.

It was _pain._

His eyes were wide and staring- like twin moons who had watched the destruction of humanity right underneath their windswept faces and were helpless to stop it. His body was shaking, mouth lightly tracing words of warped gold and bronze, fists pressed hard against his cheeks-

"Cub?" the question was choked as it came from Fox's mouth. "Cub- it's _OK,_" but it wasn't, it wasn't it wasn't it wasn't-

"Are you going t' leave me too?"

_"Too"?_

"Why would we do that?" Eagle sat frozen, hyper-aware of the fact that Cub was seconds away from splintering into a thousand pieces.

"Cos everyone _does!" _his head jerked back and off of Fox's shoulder, fists pushing harder into his cheeks, eyes full of that tangled emotion.

"We won't leave you, Cub. We won't leave you," Snake repeated softly as if it was a magic charm.

"You don't trust me." the words were struggling to become clear, but they were still terribly held down by alcohol. Frustrated, Alex tried to raise his voice- louder to shut up the voice that squawked at him to _be quiet! _And that screaming voice thats prison had crept closer to the surface. "You don't _trust me!"_

"Because you don't _tell us _anything!" Wolf broke in, his eyes burning and capturing all of Alex's attention. "How are we meant to trust someone who we hardly know?"  
Alex shook his head wildly, mouth open wide, words streaming out like haunted sailboats. "You don't-"

"You don't trust _us!" _Wolf snapped, tugging the teen towards him in a rough hug, trying to get rid of those frightening emotions that played against Alex's face. "How can we fully trust you if you don't even trust us? It's a two way thing, Cub."

He didn't trust _them?_

Eyes fluttering shut, Alex breathed in Wolf's smell of grey _(security) _and tried to shove the emotions _downdowndown._

Of course he trusted them.

Of course he-

_Tell them._

No. Not _now._

_ Tell them._

A new voice- silver in it's quality and platinum in it's tone, pushing away the golden voice which purred at him to _not trust and keep quiet._

This new voice was painful in its clarity, agonizing in its coolness but somehow

-he listened to it.

* * *

"'morrow," he murmured, knowing that they'd be listening to him. "Tell you tomorrow."

Fingers twitched.

Breaths jarred haltingly into the silence.

Sticky eyelids struggled-

-_open._

Awake.

And with a _pounding _headache.

Groaning softly, closing his eyes again, Alex shifted a half-dead hand to press against his sore eyes-

And froze as memories came rushing back to him.

Quickly, ignoring the pounding and screeching in his head, the malicious voice that crooned _you're in trrrooouubbblle..._Alex swung his legs out of-

-the sofa.

Not his bed.

Heart thumping, pounding in his ears as his headache sought retribution for his hasty movements, Alex swung his eyes down and wasn't surprised to see the rest of K-Unit sprawled across the other sofas, Eagle lounging on the other sofa with Snake near shoving him off from the other side, and Wolf and Fox leaning up against the sofa Alex had been on. All fast asleep.

Swallowing down another pained groan as pain nudged his brain wickedly again, Alex curled his fingers into his eyes, begging the feeling _away away. _When the pain didn't recede at all, Alex for the moment conceded defeat (only for a moment, because Rider's _never _gave in) and cast his eyes blearily to the clock positioned on the far wall. The time glared at him, hissing at him in a brutal question of _why he slept in so long._

It was 3 in the afternoon.

What was going on?  
Fear dragged cold hands over him and he hunched back into the sofa, hands creeping up to clasp at his hair because he _couldn't remember _where all the time had gone and-and that meant that he hadn't been _in control._

_ It's getting dangerous, Alex, _Paranoia whispered, dragging him to one corner and talking in a raspy voice, its eyes flitting everywhere as its hands clutched frantically at his shoulders even when he tried to pull the clawing hands off _("let me _go! _Stop it! Ian! Ian! Help!" biting fingers, harsh voices and he was _struggling, _writhing jerking and crying out-) _that pinned his attention down. _Waayy too dangerous._

But what could he do about it to make it safer?

He'd almost _died _yesterday.

He paused.

Frowning, Alex wondered what he was pausing for _(some type of fear) _and shook the discomfort from off of him. How could he make it_ better? _He wanted to make it _better._

_ ("I'll make it all better, Al," soothing hands that held the pain from the cut at bay. Infant hands clung to the hand, lips stubbornly refusing to tremble. "Doesn't hurt," a gruff voice breaking through, straining on the silvery reigns of tears, fists scrubbing at eyes. A laugh, sweet and gentle-)_

Mulishly, Alex gritted his teeth, lowering his eyebrows and resolving to ignore the pain of his headache with each ice-cold burst against his skull, he attempted to focus on the matter at hand, twitching as Snake shifted with a feather of a snore. Everything was falling apart. Shattering. He _knew _he should've ran harder when he had the chance. Ran harder, faster, never stopped. But he _had _ran hard. He _had _ran fast. He _didn't _stop.

Even now he hadn't stopped.

But he felt trapped.

Trapped and cold.

Cold and trapped.

Fingers curling in his hair, Alex sucked in a steadying breath _(because no one else would do it) _and silently slid off of the sofa, swaying as the remnants of alcohol in his blood made itself known. Swallowing down a rush of nausea, his face going pale, Alex reached out a trembling hand to balance himself, breathing as low and as quiet as he could in the depth of his chest- wary of waking up any of K-Unit.

He couldn't deal with facing them right now.

_Because you __**lied **__to them? _Reason suggested helpfully.

He paused, the look returning to his brow. _No, _he corrected harshly. _Because I've got a headache and I need to work out a plan to-_

_ Lie to them again? _Doubt joined the conversation, head tilted to the side inquisitively.

_I didn't- didn't _lie. Alex fiddled with his sleeves, noting the bandages on the rope burns that had been on his wrists after struggling so much when he was captured. _I had to say something! _He finally burst out as the silence of Reason and Doubt stretched on for too long.

_Something doesn't always have to be a lie, Alex, _a new voice piped up _(or _was _it a new voice?). _It's voice was soft and meek, but insistent in its claims.

_Shut up! _Something dark and ugly but decidedly golden snapped back. _I thought we _buried _you!_

_ You can't bury me, _the voice (soft and stronger now- determined) retorted coldly. _I _belong _here. _You _don't._

Shaking his head roughly again, regretting it as pain slammed into his harder than before, Alex staggered forward_ (quietly, quietly. Let's play sleeping lions!) _and slipped up the stairs, pushing down the fear of dealing with K-Unit to to the back of his mind and concentrating more fully on the fact that he seemed to have lost a good 14 hours to some mindless and shadowy timelessness.

He needed those memories _now._

What if he'd said something then?

* * *

"Where's Cub?" the sharp demand woke Fox, and he blinked drowsily at Wolf who had spoken.

"Wha-" he yelped as he was shoved off of the sofa, landing heavily on his side. Sitting up, he glared at Wolf who ignored him, eyes flickering round the room. "What was _that _for?" he snapped indignantly, glowering at the darker man as he stood up and stretched out his back.

"Where's Cub?" Wolf repeated again, moving towards the hallway.

"What's going on?" Snake muttered, standing up in his rumpled clothes, Eagle bouncing up next to him, looking alert and awake.

Fox shrugged, turning to follow Wolf before saying over his shoulder: "Cub searching."

Snake and Eagle trailed after him. "He's gone missing?"

"No," Fox followed Wolf up the stairs. "Probably ran and hid out of embarrassment,"

They got up the stairs just in time to hear some sort of commotion.

Wolf had Cub by the collar and was hauling him out of the store cupboard (whatever he was doing squashed in there) and they were both talking at the same time in loud voices. Wolf was snarling something and Cub was yelling and struggling as he was pulled towards them.

Eagle blinked at them and tried to push down the memories of (painhurtfearandterror) _that _expression on Cub's face away. "What's going on?" he had to raise his voice to be heard.

"He was hiding in the store cupboard,"

"I_ wasn't!" _Cub bit back, sounding ruffled and uncomfortable. "Will you _let go _of me! My _head _hurts!"

"And whose fault was that?" Wolf growled back, releasing Cub's collar anyway.

Standing up straight and managing a half-glare at Wolf, he shuffled a step back, unused to feeling to out-of-sorts and uncertain (what had he _said _last night?). "It wasn't _my fault," _he forced his voice to remain quiet and calm though confusion jumped in his eyes as he struggled to find out just what had happened last night.

Wolf scrutinized him for a moment or two. "Well? What happened?"

"What happened?" Alex repeated slowly, edging towards the stairs. "I don't know what you're talking about." _come on, one step closer to the stairs and then I can-_

"Don't lie to us again, Cub."

He paused, feet positioned for the perfect get-away.

That wasn't the tone he was expecting.

Wolf, he realised suddenly, looked tired _(easier to bring down. Tiredness lowers his functioning rate by-). _Tired and hurt.

Alex forced himself to look at the way Wolf stood, one hand dragging down his face- down, over his eyes, over his nose, over his mouth and over his morning stubble. Wearily, Wolf caught his eye. "I thought we'd gotten past that, now."

Alex dropped his eyes to the ground _("never look down! It's a show of submission!"). _"Sorry," he muttered.

Wolf shook his head slowly. "Downstairs. Now."

Eagle , Fox and Snake who had been quiet up until that moment suddenly burst into noise and chattering.

But it was tinsle noise.

Alex heard the fakeness in it, saw the way their eyes constantly swivelled onto him, looking in concern and worry. He also saw how gently they ushered him down the stairs.

His jaw clenched.

What the _hell _had he _said? _

Alex watched as K-Unit went and sat down on the chairs in the kitchen, but only sat down in one when Wolf ordered him to.

Awkwardly. Alex stared at the table and at his hands that were clasped on top of it.

Four burning gazes bore into the lowered part of his head.

"What?" he finally snapped, looking up sharply.

The eyes didn't move like he thought they would. He thought as soon as he looked up they'd fly away like startled moths. But instead, they remained pinned on him with a marble like intensity.

It made him nervous.

He hated being the centre of attention.

"Tom phoned when you were sleeping."

Alex jerked towards Eagle, his heart thumping wildly in his chest. "Yeah?" he kept his voice casual, eyes almost bored.

Eagle nodded slowly, seemingly playing along with Alex's faux casualness. "Wanted to know how you were after the party,"

He cursed inwardly. Well, he expected them to know that information. Mind whizzing, he opened his mouth to try and direct their attention elsewhere, but Snake carried on from whee Eagle left off.

"We didn't tell him how drunk you were when you got in." Snake's voice was almost cheerful. "And we didn't tell him how it looked like you'd been caught on the losing end of a particularly nasty fight." Alex had to bite his tongue to stop himself from snapping out that he _didn't lose. _He couldn't _afford _to lose. Snake carried on, eyes never leaving Alex's. "Care to tell us what you were doing there?"

Alex caught the ice under everyone's gaze now, and knew that he was in trouble.

His head just pounded harder.

Pressing his fingers into his eyes, Alex tried to breathe in a breath, allowing himself the brief relief of shutting his eyes. "I wanted to go and..." _honesty, Alex. Be honest. _Gritting his teeth, Alex forced the words. "...look at my old house."

"And why was that something you had to do by yourself?"

Alex stared at them.

They didn't get it, did they?

They honestly _didn't get it._

And he was _bored _of this play acting. So _bored _of it.

Time to drop all pretenses.

K-Unit blinked as the Alex's expression changed completely.

Cold and ruthless eyes glared frozenly back at them. Every pinnacle of their attention was fixed solely on Alex, their bodies alert, eyes sharp.

It was like sitting in the room with a dangerous panther.

"I had to do it by myself," the words were slow and liquid platinum, a breath of misted air. Piercing eyes dragged slowly and patronizingly over them. "Because I like _being alone."_

Eagle swallowed back his want to retaliate with something else.

He _liked _being alone?

What type of idiots did he take them for?

Couldn't he remember the way he was so clingy when he was drunk? How desperately he cried to _not be left alone? _And he thought words like those (as sharp as they were) would cause them to pull away from him? How weak did he take them for?

"Don't be an idiot, Cub," Eagle's voice was rough with restrained anger, his fists digging into the wood of the table as he bent over it to _hammer those words into his head. _"You think _anyone _likes being alone? Being alone is a defense. Not a reality."

Alex didn't sneer at him. The word didn't fit the sleekness of everything that he did, but he did give him a look that _substituted _for that word. Imperious, laced with regality and noble scorn. "Don't pretend to know anything about me." he stood up sharply, only sitting back down as Wolf tugged him down. "You _don't. _I went to the party because I needed to go back to my own house. I needed to find-" he sucked in a harsh breath.

What was he _doing?_

He didn't _need _to be saying any of this.

Then _why was _he saying any of this?

"It doesn't matter." he concluded quietly, rubbing a hand against his forehead.

"Of course it matters," Snake pressed.

"It doesn't _matter,_" he emphasised the word with layers of steel.

"Yesterday, last night, whatever," Fox's voice made Alex look up.

Ben Daniels leaned onto his hand. "We talked about this," his eyes bored into Alex's own. "We all talked and we came to an agreement. Remember what that was?"

Roughly, he shook his head. He didn't have time to be playing 20 questions! He needed to be out there figuring things out! Like how to get rid of those people and _how _he actually managed to get back home and-

"Trust is a mutual thing. Don't you think it's time you told us something about yourself?"

Tell them-?

"Tell you what?" he asked roughly, pulling back and away from the table, watching them all warily.

Ben didn't answer straight away, just sat watching him (like he _understood_) with his elbows rested on the table, dark circles under his eyes.

Alex leaned closer.

Dark circles under his eyes...

He'd done that.

Alex looked around him and caught the same weariness clinging to them all.

He'd _done _that.

_Make up for it, _that platinum voice hissed in his ear, pushing him forward. _Can't you see how much you've worried them?_

But it wasn't _his fault! _He'd never _asked _for them to worry about him! He was _perfectly fine on his own!_

_ Yeah, you sure showed that well, didn't you? Ended up strapped to a chair and beaten- _

"Fine. One question though." Alex snapped roughly, holding up one individual finger.

_("Never tell your secrets, Alex. Only to me," but if- if he didn't _exist _anymore, then who did he tell? Because the secrets built up and built up like layers of lead and tin and-) _His voice seemed to grow taut, close to breaking as he stared at them _(with pleading in his eyes he clutched at his arm. "_Please _don't tell! I promise I'll be good!") _each individually in turn. "_One _question," his lips seemed want to turn down, his breaths choking his voice out.

K-Unit swapped glances.

On one side of the coin, putting Cub through this wasn't nice. They could see the dusty fear hanging in the tired corners of his lips, seeping into the brown of his eyes like a willowy shadow forged from sleepless nights. But this was important. It wasn't healthy for Cub if he kept hoarding secret after painful seceet without telling anyone, and it certainly wasn't helping them keep him safe if he did.

They steeled their resolve.

Wolf turned to him _(don't ask me, don't ask me, don't ask-) _and before his mouth even opened, before the question slipped out Alex stood up, eyes wide.

"No!" _(your voice is loudloudloud! Shhh! Quiet)! _"No!" his chair clattered back as he pulled away from the table. "I can't _tell you _about that! _No! No! No no no no no!" _he stumbled back and into the work surface _(they were chasing him! They were going to grab him and take him back there! No! They couldn't! He wouldn't-). _The kitchen had faded away to be replaced with voices he didn't want to- didn't want to _hear _and sights that _(he was going to be sick sick sick si-)- _"_No!" _and he didn't care at that moment that he was falling falling tumbling and the voice was out! It was out and it was screaming and was that him and it was howling and sobbing and noandnoandnonotAmericapleaseplease-

"What's going on?!"

"It looks like a panic attack! Hold his arms down!"

"_Don't!"_

"Cub! It's just us! _Breathe!"_

"I don't want to remember _that!" _

"Then don't! Only tell us the part that doesn't hurt like that- OK? Shh, OK?"  
Struggling to see properly- hear properly- Alex managed to wrestle the howling voice back down into its cage and lock the gate behind him.

Near gasping, his heart hammering, Alex struggled up from off of where he must've sank to the floor, one hand fisted over his mouth and breathing in short and sharp bursts.

"Cub-"

"_No!" _he snapped, holding out a hand to push them away. "No," he murmured, hand rubbing against his mouth. "I'll- just- give me a moment,"

Nodding mutely, still under shock from experiencing Cub's breakdown (where did he _hide _such masses of emotion?) they moved to the table again and sat down- giving him space, watching as the teen forced his breaths in and out steadily, eyes closed.

Wolf glared down at the table.

He was obviously used to dealing with such episodes by himself. If they were suddenly to barge in and attempt to help, it would most likely just make things worse. But why did it have to _be _like that? What had made Cub like that?

"I'm OK now," a quiet voice brought his attention back to that moment.

Critically, he examined Cub.

Coldness washed over him.

It was eerie how he could go back to normal in such a short space of time. Cool eyes gazed down at them all. "Sorry about that. I think I've still got some alcohol in my blood," casually, he sat back down again.

They blinked at him.

"We don't have to talk about America if you don't want to." Snake suggested softly.

Alex waved a dismissive hand at them and tried for a smile _(pull of the lips, the eyes go like...this. That's right) _but when it didn't work, he let it drop. "I'll...tell you. But- but not everything," he cursed as he stammered, taking time to control himself. This headache was _not _helping! Starting again, he forced his words out slowly and calmly though really he wanted to babbleandshoutandwhineandwail- "I can't tell you everything. But I can tell you about-" he swallowed, rubbing his eyes with one hand. "I can tell you about why you've got the _pleasure_ of being with me," the word was sarcastic but laced with tendrils of pain. Doubtful eyes glanced up at them, and they were suddenly struck by how little they really knew Cub.

But this was it.

Didn't the journey to knowing this enigmatic teen start now.

They smiled at him encouragingly, but it did nothing for Alex who was already looking down and to the side. "Whenever you're ready." Wolf said in a low tone.

He would never be ready.

Alex closed his eyes.

There would never be a _right _time.

So he might as well just dive in.

* * *

_(**America; San Fransico**_

_**TIME: 17:15**_

_ "There they are!"_

_ Alex looked up at where Edward Pleasure was cheerfully pointing to and attempted to dredge up some sort of smile at the sight of Sabina running towards him with his mother jogging in tow, both of them waving their arms and calling out to him._

_ Smile, **smile, **near sweating with the effort, he tried to pull his lips up, crinkle his eyes and open his arms wide._

_ Nothing came._

_ The breath was near knocked out of him as Sabina flung herself into him, smelling of sugary perfume and things that he couldn't remember smelling on her last time. Her hair tickled against his nose and he found himself wishing that she'd let go._

_ Pulling back, and away from Alex, Sabina looked at him with wet blue eyes, her dark eyelashes all stuck together and glittering with tears, her nose pink as she rubbed a fist across it roughly. "Alex," her voice was still the same, but the word wasn't._

_ They stared at each other for a while, neither saying anything._

_ It wasn't the type of silence where words didn't need to be said._

_ It was the type of silence where too many words could be said._

_ And Alex didn't want to hear any of them._

_ Sabina bit her lip and pulled back even further her hands reaching out to clasp his face in two hands with nails painted a sparkling silver. Again, her eyes did that scanning thing, flickering all over his face and into his eyes. "Alex, I'm so sorry."_

_ She was sorry?_

_ She was sorry?  
"Nothing to be sorry for," he muttered, fingers twitching towards his ipod, wishing he could plug the earbuds in and just disappear from the world for a few minutes. _

_ She shook her head roughly and sniffed again, glancing at her parents who had moved back to give them space, talking in low tones behind them, other passport goers trailing noisily throughout the busy airport station- a completely different life from them. "I know..." she said quietly, shrugging down into her cardigan and wrapping it around her. "But...it's just not fair. After everything you did to save the world...and this just happens."_

_ "to save the world"_

_ The words were honestly spoken, clear and innocent._

_ But Alex resented them at that moment._

_ "Save the world"? What did she think he'd been doing? Did she think his life was some sort of action movie? Some sort of thing where all he did was go in, beat up a few bad guys and then- ta dah- the world was saved? Alex clenched his teeth and fought the unfair anger down. It was unfair, he decided firmly, closing his eyes. Sabina didn't know. Thank goodness that she didn't know. It was good that that was all she thought it was._

_ "It's OK. Things happen sometimes," Alex almost winced at the deadness of his voice, and quickly looked away as Sabina looked up at him with a shocked expression. "I'm sorry," he mumbled, fingers pulling out his ipod. "It was a long flight, I'm really- I'm just tired,"_

_ "Of course, Alex. I understand." her hand reached out to clasp his, give it a squeeze._

_ Alex stared down at their entwined fingers and then back up to her watery smiling face._

_ She hadn't changed._

_ He had._

_ Comfort like that just wasn't going to work anymore._

_ Carefully, subtly, he pried his fingers loose, pretending not to see as she shot him a hurt expression when he dug his hands into his pockets._

_ Alex gazed down at the floor and tried to push away images of fireandexplosionsandgunswithscorpions right into the back of his mind. They weren't helping. This was a new start- a new beginning. That was all._

_ As if she had read his mind, Sabina looked at him, the smallest hints of a smile brushing against his lips. "We're a new family now, Alex. A new beginning."_

_ Alex tried to smile again and quickly stopped when he saw the pained expression on Sabina's face._

_ Didn't anyone tell them that he was scared of new beginnings?_

_ There were so many unknown factors involved._

_ As they passed through the doors of the airport, warm air burst onto their skin._

_ "Welcome to San Fransico!" Liz Pleasure laughed and swept her arms up._

_ Alex gazed about him, at the rolling blue sky and the pale floor and large trees surrounding the car park._

_All Alex felt was cold.)_

* * *

"I don't know how much you know about me," he muttered into the table top, his fingers pressing into his forehead in a weak attempt to try and ward of his headache.

"Well," Eagle said dryly, half smiling as he tipped back in his chair. "We know that you're fifteen years of age, you go to Brookland High, you don't like peas, you're friends with a Tom, you're a stickler for breaking rules and you have some sort of connection with MI6-"

"And you drove a snowmobile into a helicopter." Wolf finished.

Blankly, Alex looked at him. "What?"

He nodded. "Point Blanc. Dr Grief. You were on the infiltration mission."

From the looks on the rest of K-Units faces none of them seemed surprised at the information, so Alex figured that Wolf must have told them beforehand _(like a real family). _Alex's eyes slowly slipped over to Ben, but he was gazing back at Alex, expression unreadable.

Swallowing, Alex nodded and then glanced at them all warily. "You're not going to ask about that?"

They shrugged, Snake smiling a little tightly. "You said one question. We can wait."

He nodded, twisting his head to the side and breathing in _(one...two...) _steadily. "I...went to America a few months ago because..." he cleared his throat and hastily skipped past _(fire! Screaming! Pain and humiliation because he was utterly defenseless to do anything anything any-) _that part. "I just went." Luckily, they didn't call him out on the fact that he'd skipped a portion of his story.

_They probably don't want you freaking out in front of them again, _Suspicion noted helpfully, settling back to watch the show.

Ignoring the voice, wishing the room wasn't so _silent _with K-Units eyes on him, he forced himself to keep going, his jaw tight and words sharp. "I went to live there with a family called the Pleasures," his voice was metallic, not allowing any feelings to get involved. It was almost like a debriefing. Detached. Do it quick and then you can go away and (cry)...he didn't want to (cry) think about that. "It was...it was- well, it wasn't their fault but, well, things had changed. I'd changed. I wasn't- how could they _expect _me to stay the same!" he looked up at K-Unit who were listening quietly. Angrily, he jerked his head back. "How could they have _expected _me not to have changed?"

* * *

_(__**Home of the Pleasures and Alex Rider- 6:46 PM**_

_**Duration of staying- 5 weeks and four days**_

_ "Hey, Alex! Dinner!"_

_ Sighing, slipping off of the sofa, he got up and padded towards the kitchen table, glancing at Sabina as he went to sit down at the table, dragging the chair underneath him._

_ Her face was tight and she refused to look at him as he sat down._

_ Just managing from rolling his eyes (she was _still _mad at him?), he nodded a quiet thanks to Liz Pleasure as she put the food in front of him._

_ He stared at the peas and very purposefully- making sure Liz saw- pushed them out of the way. The insulting objects._

_"Ah! Alex," Liz had noticed as she sat down and she cast an apologetic look towards the blond haired teen. "I'm sorry! I completely forgot about that,"_

_ "It's OK," he murmured, waiting for Edward Pleasure to stiffly sit down in his chair._

_ "Now, Liz," Mr Pleasure said, nodding cheerfully to Alex with a slight wink. "We've said that we're not going to do that." making his voice firm, he spoke to Alex. "Make sure you eat all of you peas, young man. We don't do waste here."_

_ Alex gazed at him._

_ Something clicked in him._

_ He was being _told _what to do._

"Alex, you _will _be going on this mission. Unless, of course, you would like us to have a word with the local orphanage about a certain 14 year old minor who is currently parentless and has no living relatives...?"

_His breath caught in his chest. Noting the rest of the Pleasure's with their clinking dinery and food, he mechnically shovelled up some beef and ale pie- hardly tasting it as he chewed._

_ "You OK, Sab?" Liz Pleasure asked chimingly, smiling over at her only daughter._

_ Sabina, who had been prodding food across her plate looked up and near scowled. "No," she muttered, glancing a little anxiously at Alex who returned her gaze coolly before swivelling it back onto her parents._

_ Liz looked thrown for a second before she frowned concernedly at her, placing down her own fork slightly to conentrate more on what Sabina was saying. "Why? What's wrong?" Alex noticed that now Mr Pleasure was listening seriously too._

_ He felt his mind wander as he let their voices wash over him. He knew what they'd be saying, anyway. He _knew _Sabina wouldn't be able to keep it a secret._

_ Dinner times always made Alex feel awkward. Their topic of conversation was too forced- too 'ordinary-family' like. He _knew _what they were doing. They were trying to incorporate him into the family, delete his past as an MI6 agent. His hands clenched around his fork, staring at his peas in disgust. But that wasn't how he _wanted _it to work! He couldn't just _forget _and _move on _like they wanted him to! Those things that had happened were a _part _of him! As much as the gunshot wound in his chest was, they would always be there. Whenever he looked in the mirror, those parts of his past would always be there. A few pretty words ringed in fine gold wouldn't change that._

_ "-he _what? _Alex John Rider!" _

_ The sudden and sharp noise shocked Alex out of his daydream, and before he could stop himself, his wrist had snapped up and the fork flew from his hand._

_ It was lucky that he had managed to pull back at the last moment._

_ Edward Pleasure blinked as a fork flew sharply past his ear, embedding itself into the lampshade behind him._

_ Eyes stared at Alex._

_ Alex stared back._

_ The fork clattered to the floor._

_ "_Alex..._" Edward growled._

_ "Sorry," he said quickly, arms already raised in defense. "I didn't-"_

_ Edward Pleasure shook his head slowly, placing down his knife and fork with firm and much __too controlled movements- reigning in his irritation. "We'll talk about this later," he said lowly. "What I want to know now is _why did you attack the pizza delivery man?"

Why did you attack the pizza delivery man?

_ Alex rarely laughed._

_ Laughing was a show of happiness, amusement._

_ He rarely found things amusing now._

_ The Pleasure's had tried to make him laugh. Their attempts had been all so painfully embarrassing that Alex usually wanted to at least _pretend _to laugh to try and make them stop. He never did._

_ But that..._

Why did you attack the pizza delivery man?

_Lips twitching, Alex bent over his plate and burst into lemon shoots of laughter, one hand gripping at the table as he laughed, the noises streaming over each other in many shades of tumbling yellow and apricot._

_ "It's not funny, Alex!" Sabina snapped, hurt making her voice a pitch higher._

_ His laughter faded into nothingness, lips settling like a once busied now bruised flower, eyes stilling._

_ Suddenly, his laughter tasted a little sour._

_ "Alex, listen, I'm sorry," Sabina told him, her voice small and eyes confused. She wasn't used to situations like this, he realised in bemusement, watching as her eyes flashed from him to her parents. She wasn't used to having a test in her loyalties. "I know you didn't want me-" she stopped herself, realising that saying anymore would further the trouble he was already in. Speaking slowly, carefully, she started again. "But I just couldn't _hide _it. You almost killed him!"_

_ Well, that was an exaggeration. _

Almost killed him.

_He knew how to hold back._

_ "We've _told _you about this, Alex," Liz' voice was quiet, her eyes constantly flicking over to Edward for support- she didn't look like she knew how to deal with Alex. She never did._

_ Edward took over, noticing his wife's dilemna and trying to cover it up with his own comment. He needn't have bothered. Alex had already seen how nervous she was with him when it was only him and her in the same room. "Yes, we've told you. If you ever have any suspicions of things coming back from...your _old _life-"_

_ Alex's gaze fogged over._

_ That was another thing._

_ For the first few weeks, they had encouraged him into talking as much as he could about his old missions- without breaking the Official Secrets Acts that he was liable to- a thing that he only took advantage of when they caught him at an extreme low._

_ They tried to listen and tell him that they _wanted _him to speak about it._

_ But whenever he spoke, they seemed to forget he was a trained spy._

_ He _saw _the flashes of horror or fear that flashed across their faces when he spoke, before they could catch it and squash it under a sympathetic nod or a comforting squeeze of the hand._

_ Alex knew they were trying, he really did, but it wasn't _working. _They just couldn't- as much as they tried to- understand._

_ He tried to focus back into what Edward Pleasure was saying._

_ "Then you should phone the police immediately! You said that you wanted to move away from...that life, but by you talking matters into your own hands, you're pulling yourself back to that, and not further away from things!" he tried to lower his voice into something a little more understanding, but it just came out a little strained- wires over a Jack-in-the-Box. "Please, Alex. You've got to understand that this just isn't how things are done by a-" he cut himself off quickly._

_ "Normal teenager?" Alex supplied dryly._

_ Edward Pleasure sighed and rubbed a hand over his forehead. "I'm sorry, Alex, but this has to be the last straw. No throwing forks, no attacking pizza men and _please- _tell us if something's bothering you,"_

_ "I didn't nearly kill him," he sighed, choosing to ignore that. He wasn't always completely in control of his instincts. It wasn't as if he _chose _to go round flinging forks at peoples heads._

_ Edward's gaze hardened._

_ "Alex," Sabina turned to him, her expression tired and upset. "You went to go and get the pizza and when I came to see what you were doing you had him on the floor and you were- you were-" she sucked in a sharp breath. "-you were pointing a _gun _at him!"  
Alex stared at her, brow confused. "I wasn't going to _kill _him, I wasjust making a point,"_

_ "On my front doorstep!" Sabina cried._

"My".

_Not "our"._

_ It was accidental. A slip of the tongue. But a breath on a card tower could be devastating. Ever since from a young age Alex was trained to recognise things, small things- things that people would pass up as a particle of dust in comparison to other things. But _everything _was noticed by Alex. Nothing was left to chance. And the wording of that sentence was picked up and deciphered by a hundred hungry thoughts. He smiled softly. "If I wanted him dead," his voice was cold. "He would've been bleeding out onto the-"_

_ "Alex!" Liz snapped._

_ Alex turned to her._

_ The hand around her glass was tight, her face pale._

_ Alex dropped his eyes. He'd forgotten that talking about things like that had scared her. Jack had only rebuked him when he spoke of things like that, a warning. But with the Pleasure's, the thought of talking about that repulsed them so much that they refused him to even open his mouth and let loose the words. "Sorry," he muttered tiredly. And he wished Jack was there. Jack. Jack. Jack._

_ "Good," Edward nodded in relief, turning and giving his wife an encouraging look. "Now, let's finsish dinner."_

_ "I've finished," Alex said quietly, fingers flicking at the dinner mat._

_ Surprised, Edward looked over at Alex's clear plate, and a frown lowered over his brow. "Don't forget your peas,"_

_ Peas._

_ It was small and silly, really, but it was those things that Alex struggled with the most- those were the things that linked to the bigger moments in his life._

_ His gaze was cool as he looked back up at Edward Pleasure. "I don't like peas,"_

_ Edward's gaze darkened.)_

* * *

"It wasn't their fault, I suppose," Alex continued in that controlled voice.

Wolf listened carefully as he spoke.

"It was just that they'd moved to America to start again, and, I suppose by me being there, I was bringing them closer to the things that they'd tried to leave behind." he closed his eyes, trying to remember, trying not to remember. "I don't know when things started to go wrong," and he wasn't even _talking _to K-Unit anymore. K-Unit weren't even in the room to his shadowed memories and tightly woven thoughts. "Maybe things were never right. Yeah," he smiled softly, though really, there was nothing to smile about. "Maybe, things had always been wrong. But, at some point, things just...started to catch up with me, and it-" his voice cracked. "I never meant to _hurt _them. But MI6...I could never really get away from them."

"Why would you need to get away from them?" Eagle asked softly.

Alex's jaw clenched. "One question," he reminded.

"Did you...used to work for them?"

"_One question,"_

Eagle didn't ask again, but he didn't look happy.

He shook his head, disloging memories. "Things went...bad," he looked up roughly and glared at them all- the look of a cornered animal. "I don't want to talk about that,"

Slowly, Wolf nodded, noticing the same look of terror creeping back onto Alex's face. "OK," his voice was softer than he was used to using it, eyes like gentle charcoal. "Just tell us about the enemy we have to deal with."

Alex's fingers flicked against the table, eyes flashing to the corners of the room before dragging back up to settle on their oddly calm faces. _(Why do they look like they understand?) _"MI6 don't know," he whispered, wondering why he was doing so. He spoke louder, the words feeling odd coming out of his mouth. It had been a long time since he had last talked for so long. His head throbbed as a reminder of it still being there.

They paused, exchanged glances. Snake turned to him. "This is for us," he said firmly _("I won't tell. But you have to do this for me, Alex. Come here, and I'll tell you,") _his eyes fixed so _certainly _on Alex's face. "We want to protect you, Alex. Not use your secrets against you,"

And for some reason, for some glass-blown reason...

Alex found himself believing them.

Their eyes were so burning, so _(protective. Even though he didn't _need _protecting, to have someone feel that they needed to protect him was such a...warm feeling) _strong that he found his head nodding numbly, and words slipping out of his mouth. "They call themselves the Bird Cage," _("like a bird in a cage, Rider. Like a bird in a cage,") _he sucked in a sharp breath, battling barbarous and screeching memories back into their wind torn burial place. _Downdowndown._

"The Bird Cage?" Eagle repeated slowly, his face thoughtful and serious all at once. "I've never heard of them..." Eagle's voice trailed off as he caught sight of Fox's expression.

His face was pale, eyes wide and frozen.

"Fox?" Eagle asked tentatively, leaning forward to jab him in the forearm with a finger.

He flinched back from the touch, gaze snapping back to Alex.

Alex had gotten tangled up with them?

But they were- they were meant to be _down!_

Taken down by-

-Ian Rider.

He swore softly.

"Not in front of Cub," Wolf growled.

"Fox? What's up? Did you-"

"Tell us." Fox interrupted Snake quickly, his gaze slightly frantic as he watched Alex, his fingers digging into the table. "How did it start?"  
Unnerved by the usually calm Fox's anxiety, Alex tried to put his words out carefully, not giving too much away _("No...Ian, don't _go..._please..." but his grip was too weak against his stronger fingers and for some reason- for some reason he felt...he felt really...ti-tired...), _because he still had to keep some secrets _(not because _he _said to keep secrets...). _"In America, after about a month we started receiving flowers. The first bunch came in an old birdcage and had-"

"No." Fox said slowly, cutting Alex off. "There was no way you would've known it was them just through just that," his eyes were smouldering as he reached out and clutched Alex's wrist, trying to show him the _danger _that these people posed. _No one _would hurt Alex. No one. And if Alex was dealing with these people...and MI6 didn't know...

"Will someone _please _tell us who this 'Bird Cage' is?" Eagle groaned, slapping a frustrated hand against his forehead.

"It's a group," Fox amended sharply, his eyes still trapping Cub's blank ones. (Who had taught him to hide his emotions so well?) "And one moment. Cub," he squeezed Alex's wrist, speaking gently but urgently. "This is important. _How did you meet them?"_

"It doesn't matter how I met them," Alex said calmly,his tone almost disinterested.

Fox narrowed his eyes. "It _is _imp-"

"You said one question," Alex's voice was light but tinged with metal. He looked at Fox in curiosity. "I'm giving you one answer. I already gave you a bonus answer through answering your _other _question. No more." his voice was cold- a clear warning to _back off._

Ben gritted his teeth and pulled his hand away from Cub's wrist.

Nodding, Alex picked up from where he left off. "We got flowers. Begonia's," he chose to ignore the look of understanding that fell over K-Unit's face and carried on speaking even as he saw Wolf's mouth open up to try and ask something. "I didn't know-"

"How many flowers?"

Irately, Alex turned to glare at Fox. This was quickly getting annoying.

Ben shook his head. "It's important, Alex. The number _means _something!"

"I got that," he muttered rebelliously.

"Not a countdown," Fox kept going.

Alex didn't say anything.

"They're clever. It'd be something different, something a little more obscure..." his voice trailed off, thinking.

Alex watched him quietly. "How do you know them?"

Ben looked at the teen in front of him. The boy's face was covered in bruises, his lips still sore and puffy- and yet he was still speaking even though it must've been painful for him. "Alex," he breathed and closed his eyes. "These are people you should've never met."

"Well I did meet them," he pointed out bitterly.

"But you never _should have!" _he snapped roughly, his eyes flashing open. "That's the problem! I don't know _how _you would've found out about them because they shouldn't _exist _anymore! They're an organization that took years to take down!" he leaned in closer to Alex, his eyes narrowed. Why couldn't the kid _get it? _"Do you know what it means if they're still out there?"

Alex's eyes never left his- challenging.

"It means their operation is still ongoing!" he almost hissed the words.

Wolf watched the silent fight that was going on between his two unit members impatiently. He disliked being left out of the loop. "Fox!" he barked, earning a twitch of acknowledgement from Fox. "Explain. Now." Eagle and Snake nodded eagerly along.

Fox reluctantly broke his gaze from Alex. "There's not much I can tell you," his voice was stiff as he looked at them all mechanichally. "They're- _were- _a dead organization. The most deadly one we'd had to face. They were..." he paused. "Creating weapons," he said carefully, glancing at Alex. "If they wanted someone dead, they'd end up dead. They evaded MI6 for years- decades. They were only recently taken down- about 7 or 8 years ago, I think," he frowned. "I don't know how it was taken down, but there was a big uproar in MI6 about it- I wasn't hired then, so I don't know much, but I do know that something big happened. Bigger than I could or would want to guess,"

"So, what, Cub? They want you dead?" Wolf asked after a thoughtful lull in the coversation. The thought of anyone even _attempting _to kill Cub...it made his blood boil.

"I just said," Fox answered Wolf's sharp question. "If they wanted you dead, you'd be dead,"

"No one's going to kill Cub," Eagle said softly, his voice carrying the weight of a thousand unspoken promises.

Fox nodded, his gaze dangerous. "Of course not. But, Cub. _Please, how did you meet them?"_

Alex's breath caught again, his heart began hammering before he could stop it. "One question!" his hand slipped down to his side- a subconcious comforting gesture. "_One question!"_

"Cub, don't-" Fox's sharp eyes took in Alex's subtle movement.

His hand snapped out.

Alex tried to pull back, his eyes opening wide. "What are you-!"  
Fox's hand flipped up his shirt.

Alex pulled back.

The chair clattered to the ground as he scrambled back, his hands clasped protectively over his stomach. "What are you _doing?!" _he yelled, breaths ragged. Had he seen? Had he seen? Had he-

Fox's face, if possible, was paler than before. "Oh, _Alex," _he whispered, mouth dry.

He'd seen.

"Don't tell!" he blurted out, pressing back against the kitchen counter, not caring that it was digging into his side _(he'd seen! He'd seen! He'd seen!) _and hurting. "_Please, _don't tell!" _("beg, Alex! Beg, and I might give it to you!") _

"What? What is it?" Eagle was sat up sharply, his eyes flickering between a pale and frozen Fox to Alex who stood pressed back and away from them. "_What?"_

Fox didn't even seem to hear him. His words were low, mouth dry and voice raspy- like he'd broken it through screaming. "When did you...oh, _Alex," _he couldn't seem to get his horror out past that. Because what could he say to that? He knew what it meant. He knew what-

_"Will someone tell me what's going on?" _Wolf roared, his hands clenched against the table. "If Cub's in danger then-"

"Don't _tell," _Alex was _begging now ("you see, child?" If you just ask, you get what you want," swinging ropes and a bloodied mouth, breaths gasping like hellfire into the darkness, an ugly word spat into the scream of silence. "What was that, child?"), _and he didn't _care _that he was because-

"Come here, Alex,"

_("Come here, Alex,")_

But he did, anyway. Because Fox had already seen. He had already seen so it _didn't matter ("everything matters, Alex") _so why couldn't he allow himself to _just once _be looked after- let things go, let- let things _leave him. _Because they weren't _like _the Pleasure's. They actually _understood _him _(a shocked voice. "What? You actually thought he _understood _you? My dear child, no one understands beings like you and I,") _ and that made them special.

So when Fox's hands closed gently around the material of his top, he hardly flinched (though he did keep it so it wouldn't show his bullet wound scar) and let Fox ease it up enough to show-

Wolf, Eagle and Snake sucked in a knife-like breath.

"What the _hell _is that?"

Alex forced himself to look at it, to look at what he'd tried to forget.

A black bird cage stood out starkly against the cream of his skin, numbers and figures backdropping the image. And underneath that read in bold black letters-

**PROPERTY.**

"No wonder they're after you," Snake said softly, breaking the thin and crystal silence with a tap of his words.

"This is bigger than I imagined," Eagle swallowed, trying for a wobbly smile.

Wolf just stared, horror clear in his eyes.

"And MI6 don't even know," Snake added dustily.

"They're not _going to _know," Alex choked out sharply, pulling away and tugging his top down over his bruised stomach. His eyes were panicked. "Do you _know _what they'll do if they find out?" he hissed, windy fear gusting and weaving through the hollows of his words.

He knew.

Or, at least, he had some sort of idea.

_Live bait._

That'd be his next mission.

Bait.

But he _couldn't _go back there! He _couldn't! _Not to the dusty halls and dark nights! Not to the- "You can't tell them," his words drooped, leaving him drained. "If you- oh _hell- _you _can't tell them,"_

They blinked at him, shocked by the amount of iced terror in his voice.

What had MI6 done to him?  
"We'll talk about that later." Wolf cleared his throat, his voice rough, eyes sharp. "When did you get that? Was it in America?"

_America?_

Well? Was it?

"Yes," Alex murmured.

"OK," Wolf's foot tapped against the floor, thinking hard. "You need to tell us about the flowers- see if we can work out what it means. But, Cub," he looked up. "How did you get involved with them?"

Silence leaned in breathlessly, awaiting his answer.

"I- ah-"

_Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!_

All eyes snapped to the phone.

Alex's mouth went dry.

Breath stopped.

Heart stopped.

"MI6," he whispered.

Slowly. Eyes fixed on the phone, Wolf got up before Alex's sharp voice stopped him.

"Don't get it!" his eyes were as wide as a startled horse's, his body tense and ready to flee. "Ignore it!"

_Ring! Ring! Ring!_

"We can't just ignore it, Alex," Eagle whispered back, eyes rivetted onto the phone as if it had charmed them all in. "They're our employers,"

Alex clenched his jaw, knuckles moving up to his teeth as Wolf went to the phone _(ring! Ring!), _bent over _(Ring! Ring!) _and picked it _(Ring! Rin-) _up.

"Hello?"

The dry voice of Mr Blunt shocked Wolf.

Mr Blunt _never _called personally.

He stiffened to attention.

"Good afternoon, Wolf. Or should I say evening," Wolf's eyes flickered to the clock and noted the time with a mild jolt. 7:12. He diverted back to focus as Mr Blunt's voice carried on dispassionately. "It has come to my attention that I haven't been updated on Alex Rider's condition for a while now. I'd like to recquire your presence,"  
Wolf's brain spun, glancing at his unit who was watching him with held breaths. His gaze lingered on Cub who was shaking his head, eyes pained, mouthing _"no" _over and over. He returned his attention back to the conversation. "Well, me and my unit can-"

"Not you whole unit, Roman," Blunt cut in smoothly, silencing Wolf.

"Not my whole unit?" he said, purposefully repeating it so Cub and K-Unit knew what was happening on the other end of the line.

Blunt's voice was dryly amused, as if he knew what Wolf was doing. Wolf pressed his mouth into a thin line. He hadn't called him out on it, so he'd just keep going. "No, Roman. Just you and...Ben , I think. That should suffice. Corey and Glen can look after Alex when you're here, I'm sure,"

"Just me and Ben, then?" from the corner of his eye, he saw Cub take a step forward.

"Yes."

"When do you want us to come in?"

There was a slight pause and then: "Now."

Wolf froze. "Now?" this time, he was repeating the words out of shock, he hardly noticed Alex moving closer.

"Yes," he wasn't imagining. This time, the voice really _was _amused. "I'd prefer to have you in as soon as possible. Before you forget what Alex has told you,"

Coldness swept over him.

The phone clenched tighter in his hand.

How had he-?

"Please do hurry. I don't like to be kept waiting." there was a click, and then the line went dead.

"What?" Alex was right by his side now. Even though Wolf hadn't heard him coming, he didn't jump. His dark eyes turned slowly and seriously onto Alex.

"You, kid," he said hoarsely, reaching out one hand and placing it heavily on top of Alex's head, seeing his worried look very clearly. "Are the biggest amount of trouble I've ever seen."

"I don't-"

Wolf turned to Ben who was already getting up and nodded shortly. "The master calls."

* * *

**AN-...**

** … **

** …**

** …Well. I have no idea, really. This was, by far, the most difficult chapter out of all 10. Well. I don't know. I hope it lived up to expectations. I got so many reviews that I was like "WOW! I MUST WRITE FASTER TO PLEASE THESE PEOPLE!" and then, with a stupid grin on my face, I went to write more-**

** And then deleted loads.**

** On purpose.**

** Because it was awful.**

** I hope no one's muttering "shoulda deleted this too. It's rubbish" because- well- I found it hard. Sorry it wasn't out sooner! I was aiming for Friday, Saturday, Sunday or Monday, but... well...**

** OK! No one cares about that! It's out! Do you like it? No. I didn't tell you all of what happened in America because that would be dumb. It would take too long and of _course _Alex wouldn't do that. BUT! DO NOT THINK THIS IS THE END OF THE MYSTERIOUS BIRD CAGE GROUP! Yes, some of you might be like "eh...who's dis new random group?" but it will all MAKE SENSE in the near future! Everything ties in, and I hope you're making guesses people! Ha! **

**So come on! Tell me what you thought!**

**PS. I thought of a new story idea. I'm not writing it till I finish this, though. S:**


	11. Chapter 11

**AN- HELLLOOOO! You're all wonderful! Thanks for waiting! (Not like you could do much else, meh heh...) Gaaahhh...I forgot loads of page breaks!  
**

* * *

_"Don't go!" _

Fox cast a sidelong glance at Alex who at that very moment was trying to pull Fox's jacket sleeve in a weak attempt at forcing the man to stay, fingers gripping and tugging, his brown eyes near narrowed in an effort to ignore his obvious headache and keep his stray emotions firmly locked back.

"We can't _do _that, Alex," Wolf repeated for the fifth consecutive time, shrugging on his own jacket, hefting up his keys and passing a significant look to Eagle and Snake- a clear _keep him safe._

Alex scowled as Snake pulled the teen back and away from Fox. "Don't tell them anything, then," he tried to demand, but it came out sounding more like a plea and less than a hardened command. Noticing this, he tightened his jaw and clenched his hands into fists. "Don't tell them anything." he repeated softly, voice low like a waning fire.

"We'll do our best," Wolf muttered reaching out to unlock the door, calling Fox along with one sharp movement of his chin.

Nodding, Fox followed the darker man out, feeling Alex's eyes burning into his back as he left.

"'We'll do our best'?" Fox repeated in a murmur as they walked to the car, the gravel crunching under their feet in raspy cries of protest. "What does that mean? We either _say _something to them, or we don't. Which one is it?"

Wolf shot him a sharp look as he unlocked the car door, sunlight flashing off of the gleaming surface and onto his pinched face. Tired, Fox realised. They were all so tired. "It _means _that we're not going to tell them one damn thing." he snapped, getting into the car. He glared up at Fox, fingers already clenching around the steering wheel. "That OK?"

For a moment, Fox gazed seriously down at his leader before a slow almost predatory smile stretched across his face. "No. Sounds perfect to me."

* * *

"Please, sit down," Blunt said dryly, vaguely gesturing to the seats in front of him with a slight wave of his hand, eyes as usual fixed to some sheet clasped in one hand.

Silently, the two men sat down, Fox clasping his hands on his lap, face settling into the usual mask of MI6 indifference that always crept up when he found himself in this place.

After a few moments had passed by, Mr Blunt finally placed the papers down, which Ben supposed was a relieved blessing due to the agitation that was becoming increasingly apparent in the twitch of Wolf's leg against the chair.

Grey eyes behind shining glasses peered critically at them, the paper laying flat on the desk, one hand smoothing the none existent creases down. "Please," his voice was crisp, almost sarcastic in its quality. "Begin."

"Where, sir?" Fox asked, keeping his voice as smooth as possible, inflicting only the barest hints of confusion into his voice, _very _wary of the fact that two of Britain's finest were sat directly in front of him, one examining him with dead eyes, the other with stony eyes and a peppermint in their mouth.

Blunts lips twitched up into a shadow of a smile which very quickly slipped off as if it had no purchase there. "Alex Rider, Agent Daniels," the shadow on his lips was back and he leaned forward, hands sliding silently across the desk, something frosty seeping into the grey recesses of his eyes, and Fox had to force himself not to pull back from them. "Alex Rider. Tell me."

"There's not much to tell," Fox said slowly, Wolf watching him silently. In the car they had decided that Fox would do the most talking as he was, after all, the one trained in keeping a blank mask in the face of subtle manipulation like Blunt and Jones.

Alan Blunt didn't seem very tired by Fox's constant hedging, and only settled (wrong word, Blunt never _'settled' _anywhere) back into the chair, his eyes closing slightly, examining them from beneath hooded lids. "You of all people," Alan murmured (Ben stiffened at the amusement clear in his voice), fingers drumming a muffled rhythm onto the desk top. "Should know that little information is often large information. Now," he waved another lazy but purposeful hand. "Tell me, Agent,"

Fox swallowed, fingers rubbing comforting circles into the leather of the chair underneath him. This was it, the difficult part. Blunt was like a homing bird of prey. Even the smallest slip of words could be ripped open completely, and all of its innards would be exposed. He had to tread carefully (for Alex) and not let that happen. "Very well," he noticed from the corner of his eye Wolf stiffen at the monotony of his tone, unused to hearing him in 'spy mode'. "Alex only told us of his time with the Pleasure's in America," he paused, as if searching for a better way to phrase the next part of speech, but really, his thoughts were moving at a mile a minute. "After that he seemed to suffer a mild panic attack after we attempted to bring up the reason for his moving to America." fingers still rubbing circles, Fox nodded. "That was all,"

Mr Blunt seemed _visibly _amused now.

And that in a fact was enough to worry Fox.

Mrs Jones smiled at Ben, perched on the corner of Mr Blunts desk, her own hand smoothing down the folds in her trouser leg. "Did he perhaps mention anything about the Birdcage group that he has had affiliations with?"

Fox froze, mouth going dry.

Had he- had he- given it _away?  
_His mind swept over all of the words that he had spoken so far, desperately looking for anything in their that could have been nitpicked by the Heads of Operations to reveal such information. But that was impossible! He'd kept to the bare minimum! He'd hardly said _anything!_

"I assure you," Ben's head snapped up at the oiled voice of Mr Blunt that slid over the desk to croon in his ears. The powerful man was still watching them under hooded eyes, fingers still drumming. "Your cover story was very well done,"

"Ah, sir-"

Blunt carried on talking over him in that wooden voice of his, disallowing Fox to continue talking. "Very well done indeed. But we have known for a while that Alex has..._connections _with this group for a while now," the eyes opened fully now, sharp as they pulled over the two stiff men in front of him. "And yet, you managed to gain enough trust for him to tell you himself," those thin lips twitched again. "Well done, men. Gaining Alex's trust is not something that is easily done. It seemed we were right in placing him with you,"

Fox shifted uncomfortably, sharing a glance with Wolf who's eyes were narrowed, hands clenched tight on the armrests of his chair. "What does _that _mean?" he growled, voice low and slightly dangerous. They were- they were talking as if getting Alex to trust them was some sort of _mission._

_ Which it was at first, wasn't it? _

Wolf shook the irritating whisper off of him. No. That wasn't true. That was _MI6's _mission, they never _had _a mission to gain Alex's trust. They did that of their own free will!

"Nothing, Roman," and now Mrs Jones was speaking, the peppermint rolling in her mouth as she spoke, eyes not exactly smiling as they landed on the heavily built soldier in front of her. "Though you must remember, you aren't Alex's real guardians," (Wolf's heart did _not _clench at that statement. His hands did _not _tighten around the armrests) "Merely," her head tilted to the side as if she was thinking, which was _stupid _because _of course _the Heads always had _everything _planned out before they spoke to you. It was fooling no one. Turning back to them, the (fake) smile seemed to grow a miniscule amount. "guards. Bodyguards for Alex until the threat has been neutralised."

"And when will that be?" Wolf said with forced calmness, his dark eyes burning with unspoken words.

"Soon, Roman. Very soon." Mrs Jones replied soothingly- except it wasn't soothing at all because it was a vague way to answer such a weighty question.

"It would be extremely helpful for us if you could give us more information on the Birdcage group," Fox cut in, his voice a little harsher than he had intended it to be. But he made no move to apologise for it. It had been a long day and he wasn't in the mood to be tiptoeing over things that should be said and things that shouldn't be said.

Mrs Jones feigned a look of shock. "Agent Daniels, I assure you, Alex knows _far more _about the newly revived Birdcage than we know. That is why we asked you to tell us all that he has told you."

"He hasn't told us anything." Fox was relieved that he could tell the truth now- it made it easier for them, but he was also worried. The very _idea _of Blunt and Jones knowing about this Birdcage group had put Alex in what could be described as quite a dangerous state of panic. And now they _knew. _What would that mean for Alex?

Mrs Jones nodded sagely, moving off of the side of the desk. "I understand." then she paused, suddenly going still, voice almost going _soft. _"You care a lot for Alex, don't you?"  
The sudden shift in topic startled the two men, but they quickly recovered.

"Of course," Ben said, his voice also soft. "He's part of the team now." _Part of the family, _was the unspoken lavender murmur that echoed gently through the weaves and dips in his spoken words.

Mrs Jones nodded a little, her eyes still clasping that small vanilla flame of tenderness. "That's good," she said quietly, then the waxy flame vanished and she was back to business. "Time is running out. It is of utmost importance that you find out as much as possible from Alex about his dealings with this group."

Ben frowned.

The whole thing was odd, really. Why did Mr Blunt and Mrs Jones need _them exactly _to get this information? Surely there were other ways of doing it.

"Alex trusts you," Mr Blunt answered his unspoken question.

"Sorry?" Fox asked a little dumbly.

Mr Blunt ignored the question. "If Alex trusts you, then you will have much more of a chance to get the answers out of him then anyone else will have." the man sighed a little, as if the conversation was tiring him. "As I have said before, Alex doesn't trust easily. _Every _bit of information he gives you should be give straight to us." Mr Blunts eyes flashed behind his glasses, his voice staying on the same tone but somehow being able to change the intensity of his words. "Need I remind you that you are under MI6's orders? The choice is wholly yours- MI6, or Alex?"  
Fox felt the moisture leave his mouth once again.

His fingers curled around the chair.

MI6 or-?

He kept his face as stoic as possible.

That question was _dangerous._

What did it mean?

_MI6 or Alex?  
_That- that was-

(Well, obviously Alex)

_MI6 or Alex?_

But...who _was _Alex?

_(Alex is a boy who when he laughs, he gets tears in the corner of his eyes and a dimple in his right cheek. He sometimes doesn't like to talk much and tries to push you away when he's hurt. He's scarily independent at times but has moments of childishness that is sometimes below his age. He hates peas and love apple juice and chocolate milkshake. He-)_

No. That wasn't it.

Was Alex MI6?

If Alex _was _MI6, then didn't that mean Blunts question was; _MI6, or MI6? _Thus making the question null and void.

_(But still I'd always pick Alex)_

"Alex." "Cub."

Fox and Wolf shared a joint uneasy and determined look.

They knew what their declaration meant.

They were, in the _Heads of MI6's _faces, saying that Alex, a _fifteen year old boy _had more importance than the Division made to secure Britain.

They had, in effect, claimed that chose loyalty to Alex over MI6.

Fox bit the inside of his mouth to hold back a slightly wild smile borne of fizzing nerves. _You'd better appreciate this, Cub, _Fox thought, his whole body tense. It was a wild and huge statement to make- it held his job in the balance- all of their lives in the balance. MI6 could do _anything _to them if they so pleased.

Mr Blunts expression hadn't changed from when they'd given their answer, and Mrs Jones was gazing at her laptop screen, seemingly ignoring them all. "Interesting," his voice was quiet, almost bored and Fox had to hold back an insulted frown. "But, tell me- would Alex answer the same?" some harsh intensity seeped back into his voice, wearing armour of steel.

Rubbing one hand over his eyes, Fox struggled to _care _at that moment that he was showing a weakness to the Head of Operations, just tired. "Yes," he said quietly, the word as sure as the sun in the sky. "He would."  
Alan Blunt examined Fox's firm expression under piercing eyes a moment longer, his fingers pressed into the desktop in front of him. "Very well." he murmured, sitting up a little straighter, the leather creaking underneath him. "You seem to have made your position extremely clear to see,"

Neither Fox or Wolf verbally agreed or disagreed with the comment, only staring resolutely ahead, their lips in one straight line against their faces, determination shining hazel in their eyes.

Mr Blunt moved again, folding his arms over the top of his desk and nodded slowly- almost as if they had answered, which, in effect, their silence was. He seemed oddly satisfied with their unorthodox choice. "Alex is lucky to have people who care so much for him."

Stunned, neither Fox nor Wolf knew how to properly respond to the shocking and unexpected statement. Luckily, Alan Blunt didn't seem to expect them to as he carried on slickly.

"But what matters at the moment is the fact that Alex quite simply _hasn't told you everything,"  
_Fox cringed a little_. _He _knew _that Alex hadn't told them everything _(he held his secrets like they were a part of him) _and still held them clutched to his chest like flickering gas lamps, afraid they'd leap out an burn everything around him. He _knew _that.

"He'll tell use when he's ready," Wolf defended, voice a little taut.

Blunt examined Wolf silently for a few moments before speaking. "No doubt," the words were simple but held a lilt of satire to them that made Wolf rise up a little in his seat in irritation of Blunts dismissive attitude. "Thus it's a shame that I have to inform you that we don't have time for Alex to take his time." he held up a hand to silence Fox's yet unspoken words. "What Alex holds-" one finger rose slowly and tapped against his forehead- the place where all of the most dangerous and crippling things were hidden. "-in here is of vital importance to us _now. _Not when _Alex is ready. _Whether or not you do it for MI6, or for Alex, those secrets need to be taken out of there." his eyes darkened. "If we have to do so through unorthodox means, we will. Be thankful that for the moment I am being as patient as the situation allows me to be. In the end, Alex's needs and ours are...joined."

Somehow, Fox had a hard time believing that.

He saw how hard Alex fought against the reigns that MI6 looped around him- saw the frenzy in his eyes at the mere thought of MI6 knowing that _one _thing about him.

Why?

"Whether or not you understand that, understand _this. _What Alex knows is destruction in the wrong hands," he stretched out his left hand. "And a saviour in the right hands," he stretched out his right hand and seemed to balance them both for a moment, allowing the two men to soak in his words. "So saying, I have decided to...speed up time somewhat." his voice switched tone, suddenly dangerous. He turned his head to the door and raised his voice, Fox and Wolf's eyes moving to follow the direction of his head.

"Bring her in!"

* * *

Hands still shaking, Alex pressed his forehead against the bathroom wall, water puring down him from the shower, causing his hair to stick a despondent gold against his head, strands weeping water down his face, down his eyes.

Afraid.

He screwed up his eyes and pressed one fist into the wall, splashing water.

Oh _dammit, _he was _afraid._

(Like a child)

_Afraid._

Pulling away from the wall now, he stumbled back further under the shower, water pouring into his eyes as he blindly stared ahead of him. Steam was fogging up the room in wheezing clouds of grey and white, but _still, _Alex could see the mark on his left side, dark and stark and black and heavy and-

Desperate for something else to do other than _(thinkthinkthink about blood and tears and screams that sounded just like his-)..._things he didn't want to remember, Alex swung one wild and frantic hand towards the shower nobs, just wanting to turn the water up to a high enough pressure that could blast the thoughts right out of his head. Right out. Right out. Of- of his _head._

But his hand hit the temperature nob instead.

Alex flinched as suddenly burning water spat against his shoulders, down his back, his face, his back, his mouth, his back, his head, his back- oh, his _back!_

And suddenly he was on fire. The flames were licking all over him, greedy swipes of a slavering and cruel tongue and he reached out- reached out, near screaming except he _couldn't scream _because now the fire was in his throat! It was in his _throat _and he was trying so hard to scream but he couldn't he couldn't he couldn'thecouldn't- and even when he pushed out of the shower, even when- even when he pushed out of the shower the flames were still clinging to his back _(help me! Please! I can't put them __**out!**_ ) and savaging him, tearing into him eating him maulinghimhurtinghimhurting-

_**Get a hold of yourself!**_

Alex's eyes snapped open.

Dragging breaths into his oddly sore lungs, Alex let out a soft moan, his hands tearing down his hair in panic, sliding against the wall to sit on the floor, dragging his knees up to his chest, his arms shaking, hands _still clawing _at his hair, eyes open wide and staring at nothing.

"Oh _hell," _he almost choked out, his eyes burning and throat clogging _(the hands were tight around his neck as they squeezed, squeezed and-), _hands still desperately clutching at his wet hair.

He was a _mess._

Such a mess.

Out of control.

("I know your greatest fear")

"Alex? You OK in there?"

The sudden muffled and concerned voice caused his head to jerk upwards, hands to fall away from where they clung to his hair.

"I'm fine!" he yelled back, but his voice cracked slightly at the end, making Alex wince- it didn't sound even believable to _his _ears.

There was half a beat of silence on the opposite side of the door, and Alex began to hope _("foolish thing") _that they wouldn't try and ask any further.

Of course, like many things in Alex's life, that hope proved to be short-lived.

"Please, Alex," the voice was so hushed, like dandelion puffs on a low breath that Alex had to bend towards the door to hear it. "_Please _don't say you're fine when you're not,"

The splattering of the angry shower and Alex's stifled breaths filled the pause.

Closing his eyes, Alex dug his fists into them, buckling over his knees with a shaky exhalation of air, water pooling around him, growing a little cold now.

How did you answer _that?_

"OK,"

His voice was a little too soft for his taste, a little to meek, a little to trembly, a little too much like thinly sculpted porcelain-

But on the other side of the door, they didn't seem to mind.

"There's some juice ready for you when you come out," the sentence held a smile that seemed to seep through the doors and encircle Alex's heart _(which he thought had died so _long ago_) _in sunny arms, whispering gentle things of _it's going to be OK _and other things that Alex would normally not pay attention to at all.

"Thanks," and the word held a multitude of unsaid and yet unanswered things, all clinging onto the words with thready and needy arms.

Another soft, steam-filled pause and then : "See you in a minute."

Closing his eyes and screwing up his courage, Alex struggled up _(bruises still hurting, stomach still hurting, _back _still hurting) _and squared his shoulders as he glared resolutely at the snarling shower that beckoned him forward with fiery and unwelcoming spurts of its breath.

He was _not _weak.

He was _Alex Rider._

Not weak.

"Not weak," he muttered in a feverish mantra as he _(fire! FIRE! It was-)_stepped _(-everywhere in-)_closer and _(-torrents of burning red and gold! A cruel beauty that-)_closer _(tore at his flesh-)_ to the shower _(-and ate at his clothes-). _"Not _weak," _he muttered again _(-as it swallowed him-) _and again _(-whole! Its mouth was hungry! It was-) _and again _(FIRE!)._

Alex's resolve left him.

Scrambling away from the showerthatwasnotashowerbutwasactuallyafieryfurnace indisguise he grabbed up his towel, rubbed roughly and desperately at his body and quickly dragged on his clothes, darting out of the steam filled room as soon as he was done.

Heart thudding and hammering in his chest, Alex dived down the stairs and near skidded into the kitchen where Eagle was just pouring himself some more fresh orange juice.

Catching sight of the teens wild and almost frantic appearance, Eagle put the glass down on the counter top, noting the way Alex's eyes swung towards the glass and the _clink _it made on the table. "Cub?" he asked softly, Snake looking up from making himself a coffee at the soft and inquisitive way that Eagle said Alex's name.

_A mess, a mess, you're a mess, _Paranoia sang hauntingly in his ear and Alex was unable to flick it off as usual. He frowned at the voice, eyes flicking to the clock on the wall, hands sliding to pull and tug viciously at his fingers. Wolf and Fox had been gone for _half an hour. _"They're taking too long!" he snapped. The volume of his own voice (uncontrolled and slightly reedy) startled him, and he shrank back from the noise with a widening of his eyes and a hunch of his shoulders. "What's _taking them so long?_" he tried to quench the rising panic in his voice, the panic that swelled up and rose like a thunderous wave in his stomach. Were they talking?

_They're talking, _Paranoia whispered.

Were they scheming about _him?_

_ They're scheming about you, _Paranoia agreed with a small nod.

Moaning nearly inaudibly, Alex dragged hands up to press against his face, moving back. "I'm not usually like this," he muttered to no one in-particular _(no one but me). _The past night and this day had seemed to have taken a lot more out of him than he had first thought. He was running entirely off of adrenalin and nerves now.

Never a good mix.

And, oh- they were _talking about him! _And Blunt would know! Blunt would know and they'd take him back there again! Back there again where he would be remindedofthingsthathereallyreallyreallywantedtofo rgetbutcouldn't- couldn't forget because they were always there in the back of his mind, crouching there with smiles and lies and fingers that prodded when they shouldn't and stroked when they shouldn't and _no! No! _He _couldn't _go back there!

His face had crumpled before he even realised it, hands fisting at screwed up eyes as he just _stood _there near _blubbering _like a _child._

Like a _child._

_ ("Come here, child,")_

He couldn't stay here! He needed- needed to get far, far away! Far away before Blunt could catch him! Before MI6 could grab him with their clawing hands _("get _off _me!") _and stinking promises of how it would be the _last time..._

"Alex!"

Alex looked up.

Then paused.

_Looked up._

Confused, Alex tapped one hand against the floor. The _floor. _How had he ended up there? Looking up again, Alex stiffened at the close proximity of Eagle, the other mans hands on his shoulders, seemingly pinning him up for whatever reason he needed to (he was perfectly capable of doing that himself!) and his eyes scanning his face with visible worry.

"They're not going to say anything." Eagle's sudden voice was strong. His eyes certain.

Alex felt the tide of panic that had raised inside of him in curling violet waves settle a little at the words. "They won't?" the meek whisper left Alex's mouth before he could stop it.

Eagle though, just grinned fiercely in reply, reaching out and ruffling Alex's damp hair, flicking water droplets in every direction. "Of course not!" he said cheerily, standing up and hauling Alex up along with him. "We don't tattle about family to strangers no matter what the risk," with one hand pressed firmly in the middle of Alex's back, he maneuvered the teen forward.

_Family._

A clog seemed to lodge its way into Alex's throat and he tried to hide the sudden burning in his eyes. That word held so many bittersweet and joint agonizing feelings that at times, Alex found it a struggle to work out whether that word was bad or good. He had at one time been so certain that he didn't _need _another family. He'd had four- why bother to try and make a fifth one work? But now...he'd been just _slipped _into a family- snap of the fingers- like that. And now the words were coiling around him like white drapes, tugging him into a place where he was still hesitant on whether to visit.

Alex sat down at the kitchen table and accepted the glass of fresh apple juice that Snake handed to him, hardly able to concentrate, the word _family _replaying over and over in his head like an awkward and shy radio that had long ago forgotten how to function.

"Last night..."

Alex twitched a little. He didn't want to _remember _last night. But he listened warily anyway.

"Tom said that you fought some people off," Snake wasn't exactly looking at him, more somewhere off to the side, a frown on his face as if he was in the middle of solving a particularly tricky puzzle. "What happened after that?" the lilac eyes finally moved to capture Alex's own.

Alex's first reaction was to blank off his face and avert the conversation _(do it! Don't listen to them!) _but...something stopped him.

_Trust, Alex. It's a two way thing._

Somehow, he _desired _their trust. He desired to be _trusted _once again.

Forcing his face to remain as natural as possible _(what- what _is _natural? I can't even- can't even remember what-) _and took a small mouthful of his drink. "It didn't last long. They knocked me out and brought me somewhere..." he tried to remember the place, eyes screwing up in concentration, trying to beat his headache. "It felt a little like a basement somewhere. Then, they- well, they made me drink whiskey," uncomfortably, he averted his eyes from Snake's rapidly darkening expression. "Not my finest hour," he muttered to the floor.

"And then?" Eagle prompted, sitting down next to Alex.

Alex spared them both a sidelong glance, taking in their innocent expressions as they caught his eye.

He knew what they were doing.

They were trying to distract him from worrying_ (I don't _worry! _I just-) _about Fox and Wolf.

A butterfly wing beat of warmth fluttered into his chest, causing a ghost of a smile to shade across his face in crinkled yellow paper.

That was...

It was...

Nice.

They _("don't fool yourself, boy" a lightly sneering voice, bruises pressing into a cold floor, heavy and harsh breath and a cry of-) cared _about him. It had- it was-

Alex shied away from the thoughts.

"They left me on a wall somewhere- thought I'd drop to my death because I was too drunk to balance properly. But I managed to get down somehow. I think."

Snake blew out a shuddery breath, hardly able to imagine what would've happened if Alex _hadn't _made it safely off of the wall. "You are one lucky kid, Cub," he said seriously, managing a smile.  
"How did you get home from wherever you were? From your description, it doesn't sound like you were anywhere near us," Eagle interrupted after a pause of reflective silence.

Alex opened his mouth-

-and then closed it.

How _did _he get home?  
His knee twitched anxiously. "I can't remember," he muttered, fingers flicking against his glass, nails biting into his skin.

And it wasn't a lie. His memories after and during the forced drinking episode were made up of mere fragments of blinding and discoloured moments in time- not at all coherent and impossible to scramble together into anything other than a carnival like mess of _nothing that made sense._

"Hey, it's OK," Snake called, breaking Alex out of his internal struggle _(he was _forgetting _something that was important. Important. So important...). _"We'll figure that out later. Don't worry about it,"

And again,l there it was- the name of a collective 'we'. There should _be _no 'we' and yet there- there was becoming a 'we'. He was falling into a group _(a family. Almost- almost like with Ja-) _and he didn't know whether to be wary or pleased.

_(Please, just be pleased. Let me be happy just this once. _Please _)_

"Yeah," Alex smiled, pressing the glass up to his lips in an attempt to hide his summer sky expression.

"Great!" Eagle enthused before Snake could say anything. "Now, how about we order some pizza for the whole crew? I'm starving!"

"Pineapple." Snake said immediately.

From the expression that crossed Eagle's face at Snake's words, full of contempt and disgust; it could be thought that Snake had just cursed his mothers grave in poor Spanish whilst wearing a neon yellow tutu and playing the bagpipes. "What's _wrong _with you?" he hissed.

Snake drew himself up, pointedly glaring at Eagle. "I _like _pineapple pizza," he argued back.

Eagle flinched back as if he'd been struck. "Pineapple his a _fruit," _Eagle tried to explain kindly, realising that Snake was just ignorant of how these things worked. "Fruit does not go on pizza, Snake. Would you ask for an apple pizza? A banana pizza? No. So pineapples do not go on pizzas, Snake."

"What about tomatoes?" Alex interjected softly, his elbows on the table, getting swept into the conversation with purpling hesitance. He jumped as Eagle clapped both of his hands over his ears.

"See what you've done, Snake?" Eagle hissed, Alex just being able to make out the now muffled words. "You've soiled little Cub's ears with your filthy ideas!"

"Oh for _goodness sake, _Eagle," Snake groaned in exasperation.

Alex couldn't help _(don't do it. Don't do it) _but laugh at the ridiculous conversation, the lemon noises curling and swaying over each other even more as Eagle smothered the teen in a heroic hug, his arms batting at Eagles.

"Don't cry, Cub! There'll be no pineapple pizzas today!" he cried.

Snake rolled his eyes but couldn't help but smile at the sight of Alex giving into (real) laughter, the familiar gather of tears in the corner of his eyes. "Well," he said, willing to play along as long as it kept Alex happy. "I'd like-"  
"Back, you beast!" Eagle hollered.

Snake's smile strained a little.

_For Alex. For Alex..._

* * *

Even before Mr Blunt opened his mouth to tell them who the person stood in the door was, Fox knew.

It was in the air.

And it was a _terrible _idea.

Quietly, Fox tried to express thissentiment. "Sir, I don't think-"  
"This is Sabina Pleasure." Mr Blunt cut him off, hardly even looking at his Agent. "For a duration of one week she will be staring with you. I expect you to be able to make her comfortable."

_Not good, not good, _Fox chanted in his head anxiously, eyes flickering off of Alan Blunts and onto the girl stood by the doorway with mild panic fluttering in his chest like a worried bird.

The girl- Sabina _Pleasure _(whose name brought shadows to Alex's eyes)- looked back at Wolf and Fox. She wasn't smiling as she stood there, her dark hair pulled up into a ponytail, clear blue eyes gazing back at them with a certain tiredness around the eyes.

_Mourners eyes, _Fox realised belatedly. Those were the eyes of someone who had lost something . Then...was she like Alex?

Alert now, eyes sharp, he examined her more closely. (If she was like Alex...) She was pretty, he supposed, if a little pale. Her freckles stood out on her face and she wore dark jeans and a s simple lacy white top with a black jacket on top, her chin hidden under a stripy pink and white scarf as if she was trying to bury herself into the soft material. Fox focussed on her eyes, they were the most important thing on a person- at least they were on Cub, his emotions flitted through them even at times when he didn't mean them to. Examining her eyes, Fox was relieved to see that they did not hold the same emptiness that Cub's eyes held- more the look of someone who had seen something cruel and had suffered for it- whereas Cub's eyes held the look of someone who had never known much else _but _suffering and had painfully adapted to learn to 'live with it', though in the end, that only brought on more pain.

"Nice to meet you" her voice held a slight American twang to it, and Fox held back a wince. This was everything that Alex did not need at the moment.

"Nice to meet you too, Sabina," Fox flashed her a quick and earnest smile before turning back to Mr Blunt and Mrs Jones, speaking in a low and urgent voice, careful not to let the girl behind them hear what he had to say.

"I mean no disrespect sir, ma'am, but having Sabina Pleasure live with us is the _worst _idea you could've come up with."

"I agree," Wolf rumbled, his arms crossed.

Fox nodded quickly, leaning forward, voice burning, bordering on desperation. "We can't push Alex It's taken a long enough time to get him to open up to us. And, no offense meant to Sabina, but her pretense will probably give Alex a lot more stress that he _doesn't need at the moment,_" he near hissed. "Not to mention the fact that Alex recently had an attempt on his life.  
We need to concentrate on keeping Alex safe. I thought he was your main priority?"

Mr Blunt listened to all of that with the same dull expression on his face, only speaking when Fox finished his fervent speech. "Of course Alex is our first priority," he said smoothly, but Fox didn't allow his tense body to relax at the words. "But as I've said before- we're not running at Alex's time. He knows that. And, are you suggesting that _four _SAS trained soldiers can't look after _two _teenagers?" his voice was lightly sarcastic, baiting them, Fox knew.

He gritted his teeth, refusing to rise to the direct challenge. "You said it yourself," he turned the conversation on Blunt instead, attempting to play him at his own game. "Alex has proved time after time that _four soldiers _is indeed necessary for him,"

"But you're not just four soldiers now, are you?" Mr Blunt cut in, seemingly enjoying this verbal battle if the slight raising of volume showed anything. "You're four members of Alex Rider's new _family. _And then soldiers. I'm sure Miss Pleasure here would be no trouble at all- would you, Miss Pleasure?" he directed the last question the the teenage girl.

"I'm not like Alex" came the response, which didn't seem to be teasing in the least, more bitter, a little sore sounding.

"Alex isn't trouble," Wolf snapped back to the girl.

Fox attempted to get the conversation back on track. "I'm sure she won't be any trouble," he said impatiently, or, as he'd prefer to describe it as- as patiently as possible. Which wasn't much. "But that's not the point-"

"Please do enlighten us, then, Agent Daniels." Mr Blunt broke in, voice dry.

Forcing himself to remain calm, Fox picked up from where he'd left off. "The point _is _is that Alex is our main concern at the moment," he flashed an apologetic look at the girl behind them who stood in soft silence, head down and seemingly gazing with lost eyes at the corner of the room. Twisting his head around, he carried on insistently. "And we don't want to allow Alex to suffer when he _doesn't need to. We_ can't push him to tell us things when he's not ready! It'll just make him get hurt because he'll act more reck...less...ly..." his voice trailed off, catching Mr Blunts expression.

The Head of MI6 rested his head on one fist. "All of the factors that you have mentioned have already been taken into account, Agent Daniels."

Fox stiffened.

Jaw going tense.

All of the-

So Mr Blunt was saying that he _wanted Alex to act recklessly? _Was that it? He _wanted _him to get hurt? His fingers clenched and he ducked his head, suddenly too furious to even continue talking.

Luckily, (or perhaps unluckily) Wolf held no such qualms and he snapped back. "That's ridiculous! If you knew that, then why not just out her with another Agent! We can't deal with this on top of Alex- _he _can't deal with it!"

Blunts gaze was cool as he watched them both. "I'm afraid that this is a non-negotiable order. It is not open for discussion."

Glaring, having to bite back a waspish growl and comment, Wolf glared at his fists that pressed into his knees and Fox glared to the side as Blunt closed the 'conversation' down permanently. They'd already crossed the powerful leader once already- doing so a second time...they couldn't afford to take such a risk.

"Now, Sabina, before you all leave, we'd like to speak to you alone. If you could just wait in the hall, Roman, Agent Daniels." Mrs Jones' voice was supposedly friendly, but Wolf and Fox both knew a dismissal when they hear one. They both stood up, but Fox couldn't help it. Before he left, he fixed the Head of Special Operations with a serious and damning gaze.

"You'll break him if you keep using him like a toy...sir," he said quietly.

The room seemed to hush at Fox's barely audible murmur.

Mr Blunt looked to consider the words for a moment before his eyes went steely. "I've been patient with you two today- even with your blatant disobedience. Just remember that whilst your concern over Alex is duly noted, we are still Alex's legal guardians." he lowered his voice, causing goosebumps to break out all over Ben's arms. "Easily replaceable." Blunt waited for the words to sink in before he sat back, satisfied when he caught Ben clench his jaw and avert his gaze. "Now, if you please, I'd like to have a word with Miss Pleasure."

Jaw stiff, near snarling in rage, Ben turned sharply on his heel and led Wolf (who had a quizzical expression on his face) out of the room.

Blunt watched them go, something unreadable in his eyes. When the door clicked shut, he turned his stony attention back onto Sabina Pleasure.

"Please take a seat, Miss Pleasure," Mrs Jones said politely, stretching out one arm to gesture to one of the seats in front of their desk.

Sabina's discomfort was palpable as she shifted to sit down stiffly on one of the chairs, perching right at the edge with a grimace rather than settling back.

"I presume you're tired from your flight only landing this morning , so we'll make it brief." Mrs Jones' smile had not dropped an inch and Mr Blunt still had to stop training his eyes on the girl in front of him, something calculating constantly in his gaze. "We are aware only somewhat of the things that you have...gone through back at home in America,"

A little choke from Sabina followed that statement; half a scornful laugh and half a sob.

Mrs Jones carried on, sparing the girls bent head a sympathetic smile. "But not much. The CIA is keeping very tight wraps on the matter until our business here in England is resolved. We recognise that you'd rather not stay with Alex and his new guardians, but it will only be for a week."

"You want me to pressure Alex to talk," her voice was dull and tired.

Mrs Jones mulled over her choice of words for a while. "Not in that sense, no. We want you to-"  
"Pressure Alex to talk." Sabina repeated insistently.

Mrs Jones pursed her lips. "Well, if you insist on calling it that, then very well, yes. Time is running out and Alex is not helping by keeping everything to him-"

"No, that's not it," Sabina snapped, finally looking up, her blue eyes carrying a spark of anger to them. "You want me there to scare Alex. I'm not- I'm not _stupid. _I don't- I don't _want _to hurt Alex! But if- if you put me with him I _will _because it's _his fault that-_" she seemed to gag on her words, face doing even more pale as she brought a trembling fist up to her mouth. "I don't want anything to _do _with this anymore!" she hissed into her fist. "The only reason I agreed to come back here was because the CIA said it was the only way to get rid of the people who-" her voice broke off again and she visibly struggled with her emotions, her eyes filling with tears but letting none of them fall. "I'm not _part of your game! _Alex is- Alex is-" she sucked in a steadying breath and then she spoke again, her voice calmer, lower in volume. "I'm not about to taunt Alex just because you want him to tell you something that he hasn't because you'll just _use him for it! _So if that's your stupid idea- leave me out of it!"

Mrs Jones and Mr Blunt gazed blankly at the girl who now stood in front of them, cheeks slightly pink and shoulders moving up and down from the exertion of her tirade.

"Very well,Sabina." Mrs Jones said finally, keeping her voice calm so as not to antagonize the already highly-strung girl any further. "We did not want you to get Alex to tell us anything, rather, we had hoped that both of you in the same place could help you both mend." she chose to ignore Sabina's obviously mocking snort of interruption. "Please don't say anything about Alex to _anyone. _He's currently in a very dangerous position. Be aware that _anything _concerning Alex's...exploits could end up in disaster for him and everyone else. Just get through this week, and then we are expecting some CIA Agents to come and take you with them."

Sabina twisted her lips into a scowl at them. "Don't try and lie to me. Alex has told me plenty of things about you to me, and although he's a liar, I know that he was telling the truth when he told me that you didn't care for anything but your own business. You don't want us to be friends again, we both know it- so do us all a favour and _quit lying! _Now, if _you don't mind, _I've had a long flight, I don't want to be here, and I'd rather forget that any of this even _happened!" _not even waiting for a dismissal, she moved angrily to the door, threw it open, and made sure to slam it behind her.

"Teenagers." Mr Blunt muttered after a quell of brief silence.

"Yes," Mrs Jones mused, popping in another peppermint as she crushed her near finished one in between her teeth. "You do tend to forget about their overwhelming need for drama after spending so much time with Alex."

Another lip flicker. "Quite. But that isn't of concern at the moment." he clasped his hands on the desk in front of him, something frightening creeping into his eyes. "The move from Birdcage was unexpected. But now we are back in control."

Mrs Jones nodded in affirmation, eyes fixed onto her laptop screen once again. "K-Unit seem more attached to Alex that I expected," she admitted softly, fingers tapping at the keys of her keyboard.

"Hm. So do some others."

Mrs Jones glanced sharply at Mr Blunt, straightening up from her work and speaking stiffly. "My feelings for Alex Rider do not-" before she could finish, Mr Blunt ct her off coolly.

"I know, Mrs Jones. I was merely saying that Alex has the talent to draw people in quickly. I was insinuating nothing about our effectiveness when Alex is involved."

Mrs Jones tersely looked back at her laptop, not believing her superior in the slightest.

"That attachment can only work to our benefit. Everything is following along perfectly."

Tulip knew what he meant when he said _working for our benefit, _she had had it explained to her before, after all. Her fingers tapped a little harder than necessary at the keyboard.

"They trust Alex enough to actually turn against us," Mr Blunt mused, turning a pen in his hands and peering at the way the light spin and bounced off of it. "It's better than I expected,"

Mrs Jones nodded once again, but couldn't work out whether it was due to her agreeing with him, or her desire for him to just _stop talking._

She _knew _that Alan Blunt had picked K-Unit to be Alex's new guardians due to the high likelihood of the four men and one boy to create strongly protective bonds.

Bonds that MI6 could once again threaten.

But that wasn't all of it.

It was also to-

A wave of sickness hit her and she sucked a little harder on her peppermint, waiting for the soothing effects of the mint to calm her stomach.

No, She wouldn't think about that just yet. One step at a time.

"I do hope Miss Pleasure takes our advice to heart in that she doesn't attempt to tell K-Unit anything."

"She won't." Mrs Jones replied automatically even though she knew that Alan's 'concern' wasn't a concern at all; merely a test as to where she stood. Whether or not she knew her priorities. Which she did. "Through placing her with Alex, it will cause tension and so help push events further into motion, allowing for Alex to finally tell what he knows. Really, everything works to our benefit."

Mr Blunt, moved his head with a minimalistic movement and appraised the stone faced woman in front of him. A small shadow of a smile stretched his lips upwards. "You're learning, Tulip. You're learning."

Nodding stiffly, Mrs Jones quenched the queasiness and nausea that the comment brought and instead tightened her lips. "Thank you, Alan."

* * *

Wolf never thought that there'd be a day when he missed Eagle.

But it was here now.

He missed Eagle and his ability to make heavy atmospheres light again. They needed that _now. _  
The atmosphere in the car was practically _uninhabitable._

Fox looked furious and was _not _helping the atmosphere, the girl, Sabrina or something was just generally dark, and Wolf was battling with multiple confusions, and so didn't have the time to try and lessen the weighty atmosphere. (Not like he could care less, anyway.)

'_Legal guardians'_

What did that mean? Sparing a glance at Fox, he mulled over the fact that his team member hadn't even flinched when Mr Blunt had said that- so he must've both _known _and _knew _what it meant. Wolf drummed his fingers against the dashboard, glaring at it.

Nothing was going to plan.

Things were going from bad to worse in a matter of hours. Next thing he knew, they'd get home and the house would've been bombed by vengeful guinea pigs or something.

And again. He was going off track.

"It's just for a week."

"Huh?" Wolf muttered intelligently, twisting round to stare at Sabrina who had spoken.

Icy blue eyes glared back at him, and Wolf just doubled his own glare, watching in satisfaction as the girl dropped her (amateur) evils. "It's only a week, then I'll be gone." her voice was suddenly meek, soft like shaded flowers.

Wolf sighed, turning back round in his seat; closing his eyes and wondering just when they'd been demoted from soldiers and spies to babysitters. "It's not you," he said gruffly, eyes still closed. "It's just..." he scrambled for the right words. "Not the right time." he finally settled for.

"I know," the girl muttered, and Wolf heard a soft _thump, _her forehead hitting the window. "Nothing's ever the right time."

Not _another _cryptic kid! Wolf groaned internally. "Just...be careful around Cub, OK?"  
"Cub?" came the puzzled query.

"Alex," Wolf replied.

"Oh." she said quietly.

"Yeah. Just take it easy. Cub's had a rough night."

"No surprise there," Sabrina muttered.

Wolf's eyes opened sharply. "Not a good start," he growled.

Fox suddenly decided to talk then, and his voice was tense, eyes not moving at all from the road in front of him. "Sabina, listen. I don't know what happened with you and him over there, neither do I want to know- any of us for that matter- until _he's _ready to tell us. It seems to me that you've had a rough time of it too, but please- whatever part Alex had to play in whatever's going on, please try not to hurt him over it."

_"Hurt him?" _the girl cried. "Why does everyone treat him like he's so _precious?"_

Wolf attempted to interrupt, but Fox shook his head slightly, mouthing _let her speak._

"I don't even _want _to see Alex! We've already said our goodbyes and that was supposed to be _it! _We said goodbye because of _this fact! _We hurt each other when we're together! I don't _mean _to- but- but what he _did _in America... I can't- _can't forget that! _If only he'd never-!" she struggled to hold back her tears, tired and frustrated and just _sad. _I don't want to hurt Alex but I _will. _Just by _being there _I'll hurt him and I can't help it! Whenever I see him I just- just remember and suddenly I don't want him to forget! SO don't- don't tell me not to because you don't understand!" her voice cracked and suddenly she was crying. Wolf could hear her stuttering breaths and wispy and faint murmurs of "no, _no. _I don't-" that fell over each other in clumsy lacy tumbles.

Wolf cast a glance at Fox who was simply staring ahead, his eyes dark and posture stiff.

"How can they expect..." Fox hissed, catching Wolf off guard with the sheer amount of loathing in his voice. "How can they _treat _people like this? What are we going to do?"

"We do what we always try to do. Keep Alex as safe as we can do. Which...admittedly, backfires quite a bit." he muttered.

Fox looked at him from the corner of his eye, and although he still looked livid, some of the ferocity had dropped from the edge and amusement trickled into his eyes from Wolf's awkward attempt at calming him down- which oddly, Wolf always had the ability to be able to do. The sound of Sabina's powdery hiccups and the soft grumble of the engine were the only things that could be heard for a while before Fox sucked in a shuddering breath.

"This is MI6's worst idea yet." he whispered. "How is Alex going to take this?"  
Wolf pressed his knuckles into his chin.

No. That wasn't the right question.

The real question was:

_Would _Alex be _able _to take this?

Wolf turned back to stare out of the window, his gaze hard.

They could only pray.

* * *

In the end, they had ordered one pineapple pizza.

Though Eagle just _would not _letup on teasing and complaining about it.

When Snake had attempted to get Alex to try some (who had taken a mouthful), Eagle had once again swooped down and this time swept Alex up, hoisting him into the air this time and demanding that Snake not _"turn him to the dark side"._

"You're going to make him choke, Eagle! He's got food in his mouth!"

Eagle stared down at Cub in horror. "Spit it out, Cub! Quick!"

Face red from laughter and near choking, Alex shook his head and attempted to pry Eagle's arms off of him, his feet kicking in the air.

"Spit it out!" Eagle shook him.

"Eagle! Do _not _make him spit it out!" Snake snapped

In the end, Alex managed to swallow it, bursting into laughter as Eagle shook him, wailing in horror cries of _"not you too, my boy! Not you tooo!"_

"Put him down, Eagle! You'll just make him sick!" Snake tried and failed to sound stern, a smiling quirking the corners of his lips upwards as he caught sight of the way Alex's face scrunched up when he laughed.

"Not with you hanging so close with all of your pineapply wickedness!"

"Wha-? _Eagle! _Would you _cut it _with all of your hatred towards pineapple pizza?"

"Never!" he took another bite of some non-pineapple pizza, offering it to Alex who was still laughing too hard to eat anything.

"And put Cub _down!"_

"Don't be jealous, Snake. You can have a turn later."

"Eag-"

The sound of a doorbell ringing made them all freeze.

Alex's laughter died somewhat in his chest, the same all familiar frost creeping up and around him until Eagle leaned down and murmured to him.

"Remember what we told you, Cub. Trust us."

Alex felt the tension leave him _(you're getting too close. Too close...)_

"OK." Alex said quietly back, a smile finding it's way onto his face again.

"Now! To the door!" stepping over pizza boxes, Eagle stepped to the door, Alex still squirming in his grip.

Humming and chuckling at Alex's discomfort, he moved the teen to his other strong arm, shoved the half eaten pizza slice into Alex's reluctant hands and grabbed the keys before triumphantly swinging the door open, Snake hovering behind them.

Alex and Eagle stared at Wold who stood stiffly in the doorway with Fox. Their eyes were dark.

Dread began to fill Alex. "What's wrong?"

Their eyes flickered down to Alex and briefly on the pizza slice still in his hands.

"It's not pineapple!" Eagle said quickly. "Don't worry. It's only Snake who's into that sort of thing."

"Hey!" Snake glared at Eagle who feigned innocence.

"What's _wrong?" _Alex pressed, body cold. Eagle settled him down on the floor, noting the tension in the air.

Alex backed away from Wolf and Fox as they exchanged regretful gazes. Bumping into Eagle's chest, Alex tried to keep down Suspicion's screams.

_They sold you out! _Paranoia screeched.

_I _knew _it! _Suspicion barked triumphantly. _They always do in the end, Alex!_

His chest began to ache a little at their reluctance to speak. "What _is it?" _he near yelled.

"Listen, Cub," Ben's voice was strong and urgent, forcing Alex's attention. "We didn't say anything to Blunt-"  
"Promise?" he blurted out desperately.

Ben's eyes softened. "You know you don't need to ask us that," he murmured. "But yes. I promise."

Eagle nudged Alex, a cheerful _told you so._

But that still didn't explain Wolf and Fox's tension.

"Then why are you-"

"Cub." Wolf was speaking now, his voice clear and powerful but also insistent. "They already knew about the Birdcage."

Suddenly, Alex felt oddly disconnected from the world. "They did?" was that his voice?  
"Yes." Wolf nodded impatiently. "But now, Alex, we need you to- look at me, Cub."

He managed to collect enough of his drifting attention to focus in fuzzily onto Wold who was waiting for him.

"Listen." he repeated, voice gentle. "I'm _sorry, _Cub, but you're going to be put in an uncomfortable position for a while. We said no, but it was a direct order."

"Do what?" Alex felt oddly calm, eyes already assessing for escape routes and possible weapons. _(They wouldn't _betray _me! I _know _it!)  
_Wolf paused, and Alex could tell that he didn't know how to explain. Finally, he turned to Ben and nodded. "Go on,"

Alex stiffened, eyes snapping onto Ben who nodded and then moved to walk away. "Where's he going?" he demanded sharply.

"_Trust us, _Cub. _Trust us." _Wolf said urgently, his voice a repetitive-

-order?

No...plea.

A plea.

_Trust us._

_ Don't trust them, _a voice whispered, tone angry like savage thorns. _I've told you that you don't need anyone but me!_

_ Trust them. They've definitely proved themselves to you, _the platinum voice countered. _Think about it! They would've had to most likely choose who to be loyal to right then and there. MI6 or...you. And they chose you. Alex Rider. Cub. Over Military Intelligence!_

_ "_Ok, Ok!" Alex muttered, hands flickering at his sides. "I- trust you."

Wolf's expression morphed from shock to such gentle (tender) happiness that Alex had to look away. Unused to such a look. The crunch of gravel captured his attention again and he looked up to see-

-No.

-No.

_No._

_ "No." _Alex took another step back except there _was _no other step to take back and there was no room and _"No!" _there was suddenly no air _("Your fault! It's __**your **__fault! If only I'd never-")_and he couldn't breathe couldn't breathe couldn't see _(scratching nails and tears and tears that mixed with the blood that as all over both of them-) _couldn't _breathe!_

Sabina took up all of his attention.

_What was she _doing _there?_

She was watching him, emotions all too clear _(oh __**please, **__no. No. Don't _look _at me like that) _on her face, in her eyes _(flooded with tears, red and sore) _in the grimacing tilt of her mouth that said _("I __**hate **__you! I __**hate**__ you! Why, Alex? Why would you even-")-_

"Hello again."

"_Sabina." _he whispered.

Her lips seemed to quiver on her face, eyes going all funny and voice going tight and strained. "Are you going to let me in, then? Or do I have to stand on the doorstep all day?

_ ("What are you doing, Alex? Are you just going to stand on the doorstep all day?" dark swinging hair and blue eyes) _

Alex found he couldn't move, pinned there under a gaze he thought _(hoped. Wished) _he'd never have to see again. In the end, it was Snake who pulled Alex out of the way and let them all in, Alex's eyes stuck on Sabina and the suitcase she carried with her.

"So...Sabrina, is it?"

"Sabina," she corrected.

"Ah, yeah," Eagle grinned, and Snake rolled his eyes, knowing that 'Sabrina' was going to stick. "So..." his eyes trailed down to Alex who still stood stock still- unmoving. "Anyone fancy telling me what's going on?"

Wolf grunted, shutting the door behind him. "Sabina's staying with us for a week. MI6's orders." his eyes shifted down to peer at Cub.

Alex could hardly hear them, his eyes fixed on Sabina.

The dark haired girl twitched and spun around to glare at Alex who physically flinched. "Would you _stop _staring at me?" she snapped.

Alex took a clumsy step back, hands already moving up, eyes wide and glazed like fogged stained glass. "Sorry." he near whispered.

Tense silence passed and Fox tried to turn the atmosphere. "So, you got pizza?" his voice was straining, a little too cheery to be called real or comfortable. "Any for us?"

"Sure!" Eagle leaped in, happy to be try and lighten the mood. "We've even got-"

"If you say one more thing about pineapple pizza, I swear..." Snake muttered.

Eagle shot him a cheesy smile and ushered everyone into the living room, gripping Alex's arm when he made no move to move from his spot that he seemed to be stuck to.

All sitting down in the room, they passed the pizza boxes round, attempting to make light conversation whilst Alex seemed utterly lost and Sabina seemed to be doing her best to ignore him.

"What's that sound?" Wolf interrupted Eagle who was trying to explain to Sabina just why she shouldn't eat pizza 'upside down'.

"What sound?" Snake frowned, listening in.

"Sounds like...the shower." Wolf muttered, eyebrows lowered.

They all turned to stare at each other.

"Creepy." Eagle whispered.

"Alex, did you forget to turn the shower off?" Snake nudged the teen from where he sat stiffly on the sofa, sandwiched between Snake and an overprotective Wolf.

His foggy eyes turned to gaze at Snake who shifted uncomfortably at the look, remembering that that was the gaze that Alex had held when he had first woken up in Blunts office. It had taken weeks to strip at least a little of that fog from his eyes, and now it was back again.

"I didn't...forget." his voice was hardly audible. "Just. Didn't want to."

"Why not?" Snake asked, unease shifting in him.

"Hot." the word left his mouth like a runaway train, eyes going odd and even more glazed.

"OK." Snake murmured, trying to tug him out of whatever shell he'd closed himself off into.

"Why are you acting like such a baby?"

Snake turned to stare at Sabina.

She sat watching Alex with something hard and cold in her eyes.

Snake's eyes widened in absolute bafflement. Was that..._hatred _in her eyes? Why on earth-

"I'm not acting like a baby," Alex snapped back, sitting up a little, losing some of the glaze to his eyes.

"Yes. You _are." _she insisted between gritted teeth. "And have you _still _not gotten over your fear of hot things?"

Alex flinched back before his eyes dropped to freezing. "_Don't-"_

"Don't what?" her voice was getting louder, ignoring the Eagle who murmured to her to cool it. "Don't _tell the truth? _Don't speak to you? _What?"_

Alex blinked rapidly, trying to swim out of the thoughts that her high pitched _(screaming! She was screaming and screaming at him and it _was _his fault! It was and he was so sorry but she wouldn't let him say sorrysorrysorry-) _voice brought about. "Sab," his voice cracked and he hastily tried to clear it. "Look, I know that-"

"You _don't _know, though, do you, Alex?" her eyes were filling up again and she scrubbed at them roughly. "Because it was _your fault!"  
_"It _wasn't!" _Alex stood up now, cheeks tinging pink, shaking off Wolf and Snake's hands as they tried to pull him down. "I didn't mean for _any of that! _They were my-"

"No they _weren't!" _and suddenly, it was an all out yelling match. "They were _mine _and you- you-! You haven't forgotten, have you?"

"Of course I haven't-"  
"Well don't _ever _forget! Never ever1 I have to live with it _every single day of my __**life! **_Don't you dare-" she was swiping at her eyes now but still managing to shout at him. "I haven't forgiven you yet."

"I didn't-" Alex's yell was cut off.

Sabina's lip curled. She tried to think of the nastiest thing she could, anything to hurt Alex as much as she was hurt (which she knew was wrong wrong wrong, but she was just too angry to care). "No wonder you haven't got anyone left," she hissed.

Alex felt his heart drop. His eyes narrowed, breaths wheezing in and out of his chest. "Don't you _dare." _he spat, shrugging off Snake's arm and warning as he moved closer, eyes narrowed. "I made a mistake. I- I _know _that you can probably never forgive me but I-"

"Never forgive you. I'll-"

"But _don't try and-"_

"All dead," she taunted. "All of them. And you did it. You did it."

_Yes, you did do it._

_ She's right. _

_ It's all your fault._

"You two-" Wolf tried.

"I _didn't want it either!" _Alex shouted, face red.

"_Neither did I!" _she screamed back, near bending over her knees, hair swinging out of her bobble and catching on the tears on her face. "But you made my parents _blind and deaf!"_

Alex staggered back, eyes wide.

His heart froze.

"I didn't-" he tried to reach forward, shake off the way K-Unit _(his family) _were listening and watching, their expressions-

Mouth dry, he tried to grip her arm. "Sab, I _didn't-"_

She pulled back from him, hands over her face, crying openly now, flinching away from his touch. "You _did!" _

The floor was crumbling beneath him and Alex tried not to let memories swamp him, sucking in barbed breath after barbed breath. "I'm _sorry!" _he wailed, hands still reaching out for, his own eyes burning now, voices accusing accusing him and hitting him and kicking him and- "I didn't _mean to!"_

"Just _stay out of my way." _she looked up at him, and her eyes were haunted. "And never forget. Never _ever _forget." shakily she raised a finger to point at him. "That's your atonement. Let it eat you alive. Suffer. _Suffer _for it day and night and make sure that it _kills you inside! Kills you and everything you-"_

"ENOUGH!"

Nobody moved.

Wolf looked livid as he physically pushed them apart from each other.

Unknown to Alex and Sabina, he'd been yelling at them for ages, Fox and Eagle attempting to pull Sabina back whilst Snake tried to pull Alex back.

Wolf spared a look at the utterly _destroyed _expression on Cub's face and turned to face Sabina. He tried to remind himself that he had no idea what was going on, didn't know any of the reasons for why they were acting this way, but from seeing the look on Cub's face...

"Enough," his voice was cold and Sabina shrank back from all of his towering fury. "I don't know what's going on, but this is the _last time _anything like this happens again. _Do you understand?" _unknowingly, he had reverted back into soldier mode.

She nodded slowly, hiccuping softly into her hands. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

Wolf clenched his jaw. "Maybe you should go and cool down," he said quietly. "We'll speak to you later."

Nodding, she shuffled out of the room, guilt splayed all over her eyes.

Wolf waited stonily until she had gone up the stairs and finally turned to Cub.

The sight of him frightened Wolf.

Cub was utterly still and his face...

It looked as if someone had just made him watch his own brutal death.

"Hey, Cub," Fox's voice was extremely soft, like downy feathers and the undersides of clouds. "Talk to us, yeah?"

His mouth moved, but nothing seemed to come out.

"Cub?" Fox pressed.

His wide eyes flickered and he choked out some unutterable statement that no one caught. His body trembled and suddenly he was folding in on himself, his hands reaching to press against his eyes, mouth open in a silent cry, back hunching and shoulders turning inwards.

"Take it easy! It's OK!" Snake reached out and tried to straighten the teen out, but he rocked away from him, mouth still mouthing silent screams. It was scaring them.

"_Cub!" _Wolf barked and gripped his shoulders, shaking him .

The hands didn't move from his face but Alex finally choked some words out, horribly garbled and disfigured beyond belief as they were torn through grief. "I _didn't forget! _I swear!"

"It's OK, Cub." Wolf spoke clearly and as calmly as he could manage, trying to prise Cub's hands off of his eyes.

"I'm _so sorry! I'm__** so sorry!**__" _his voice had cracked, allowing raw grief to tip through his voice like rusted water.

Somehow, Wolf didn't think he was talking to them anymore.

Catching Fox's eye as well and Eagle and Snake's, he shook his head slowly, mouthing _don't leave him _and then gesturing with a jerk of his chin that he was going to go upstairs.

They nodded to show he understood, and reluctantly, passing (_their_) Cub a troubled look. "I'll be back soon," he murmured, but Alex was too busy moaning into his hands to answer any reply back or even _hear _him.

* * *

Sabina stared at her hands in her lap and wondered just when-

-she'd gotten so ugly.

So twisted.

_It was Alex's-_

Tightly shutting her eyes, she bit her lip hard. No. That didn't cut it.

When had she gotten so _hideous?_

The sound of a door unlocking caught her attention and she looked up quickly to see the dark eyed man (Wolf, or Roman. Wolf suited him better) step purposefully into the room, leaving the door open behind him as he sat on the beanbag opposite her.

A moment of silence passed where Sabina stared at her hands and Wolf just sat there.

"I'm sorry." she whispered.

"It's not me you should be saying sorry to," came the immediate reply.

Sabina bit the inside of her mouth and went back to staring at her hands.

At the sound of a gusty sigh, Sabina twitched.

"Cub- sorry, Alex...you should have seen him when I saw him for the first time in- what? A year and a bit? He looked like a dead person. No personality- just like he didn't care anymore."

Sabina frowned at the deep voice washing over her. Why was he telling her this?  
"His eyes were all dull and cold, you know? Well, I hope you don't see too much of that. I've seen plenty of men with eyes like that in my line of duty-mostly leaders of units who were the only ones left. As soon as I saw Cub's eyes I just knew that they were the same as those men I said before. Weighted. As if he was alone." Wolf or Roman paused for a moment before continuing, his voice a shade warmer than before. "But then, after a while, that started to change." Sabina could hear the smile in his voice as she stared down at her clasping hands. "It took time, and still he has a long way to go before his eyes ever change from what they were like then...but now and then, he looks almost...happy. But it's always there. That loss. That hurt." the sound of a shifting beanbag indicated that he was moving to face her.

"I'm not asking you to forgive him or anything. I'm not asking you to do anything but this-"

Sabina forced herself to look up and face his burning but gentle gaze. The look surprised her.

"Remember that Alex is _always _hurting. Whatever happened over in America will probably haunt him for the _rest of his life. _Does he really need you to make that any worse?"

"I just-" she swallowed, clearing her raspy voice. "I don't mean to...it's just not _fair. _Nothing like that was ever meant to happen." her voice was hushed.

Wolf nodded slowly and then awkwardly reached out to pat her head. "Well, I don't know what's going on, but hopefully you can try and solve it by the end of this week."

"A week's not long enough," she murmured.

Wolf's lips twitched into a smile. "You'd be surprised of how much can happen in one week,"

Sabina managed to pull up her own smile, even though it was a little bruised at the corners. "I _lived _with Alex, remember? I think I know,"

He grunted with a little laugh. "Fair enough. Well make sure you come down soon otherwise Eagle will eat all of the pizza." he made to leave by the door before Sabina's voice called him back.

"Wolf."

He cocked one eyebrow. "Yeah?"

Fidgeting, eyes still weary she moved a step closer. "Alex...make sure, make sure you get him to tell you _everything. _Don't let him leave anything out. OK? That's- that's how everything happened in the first place. Make sure he doesn't keep secrets and- and _listen _to him. Everything. That's what- that's what we forgot to do." she struggled with the words as they weren't first nature anymore. They huddled and struggled on her tongue as they scorned her for attempting to say them. But she _had _to say them before the hatred in her (that she couldn't _help_) swallowed him up whole.

Wolf paused, and then a slow smile stretched across his face. "I understand. Thanks," with that, he turned and left the room, leaving Sabina alone.

* * *

When Wolf came back down the stairs, Alex looked much better.

But his eyes were pink and his body still looked like it had been made out of papermache stuck together with crumbling glue.

"Hey." Wolf said softly, dragging a chair up to sit in front of Cub, Eagle and Fox bent next to him murmuring things to him whilst Snake looked on with his brown furrowed in concern.

"What happened?" Wolf asked quietly.

Snake glance up at him. "I don't know." he admitted. "One moment he was having some sort of breakdown, and then next he just sat up and attempted to brush it all off."

"Did you say anything to him?"

"Just, you know, stuff. Trying to comfort him. Nothing in-particular, though," he shrugged, but the careless gesture didn't fool Wolf for one second. Snake chewed at the skin on his bottom lip, eyes slightly haunted. "It looked like he was _dying, _Wolf."

Wolf nodded silently, turning his attention back on Cub who gazed down at the carpet beneath him.

It had looked like that.

"I'm sorry," Cub's sudden whisper drew every eon of their attention. "I didn't mean to do that." his voice was hollow.

"It's OK, Cub." Eagle tried to soothe.

"I didn't mean to." he murmured.

"Mean to what?" Fox asked gently.

His eyes flickered and he tiredly tried to sit up again. "Act like that. I'm usually much-" he broke off and closed his eyes briefly. "You don't know me very well, yet."

Wolf blinked, sharing a look with Snake. What did he mean?

Alex's head dipped down and he struggled to lift it up again. "I made a lot of mistakes," his words were like Chinese lanterns carried on an autumn breeze. "I won't make them again, though. I'll keep you all safe."

"Those should be our words, Alex," Eagle said firmly.

"I won't let it happen again," he didn't seem to have heard Eagle.

"_Cub, _wherever you went wrong it's _OK. _You know that we're always here,"

Alex looked up at them, finally, his eyes long ago burnt out stars, spreading cinder through the air and into his lungs. Alex sucked in a heavy breath and let it out. He struggled with a smile. "Right. Always there."

"Always there," Fox repeated, making his voice louder.

"No matter what. We don't leave any men behind." Snake snapped.

"Or kids," Eagle jumped in.

"Once you're part of the family, Cub, you don't leave," Wolf's grin was ferocious, his dark eyes smiling. "Get it?"

Eyes wide, still sore, Alex peered at them, his chocolate eyes still misty.

_You're getting yourself into _hell, _child._

Closing his eyes again, Alex steadied his breathing and attempted another smile, raising his chin . "Right," a smile trembled on his lips, like balancing a leaf on a matchstick. "I get it."

Wolf smiled in satisfaction, leaning back in his chair.

Snake dipped his head to hide his relieved expression, a smile warming his eyes. Wouldn't it be nice if their story could end there? A bell strung _Happily Ever After _ringed with sky blue ribbons.

A scream tore that thought to shreds.

Wolf stood up sharply, already moving to the stairs with K-Unit hot in pursuit. "Sabina!"

* * *

**AN-...And yet another chapter to add! Yeay! Uh, what? I mean, yaaaayyy! Well, not really. Once AGAIN I'm at a loss with this chapter. It kind of- well, it **_**needed **_**to happen, all of this, but, well. Here it is, anyway. Tell me what you think please! If you ask me to burn it, I'm afraid I can't do that even though I'd love to at the moment. But I figured that you'd waited patiently enough, so I didn't want to keep you waiting. Sorry for the wait! Shan't happen again (hopefully)!**

**Now, tell me. Was that as bad as I thought it was, or...?**

**NEXT CHAPTER-****Alex is in for a nasty surprise as well as Tom. Plus! K-Unit have their hands full dealing with two teenagers who won't tell them just what's making Alex have such sleepless nights... (popcorn not included)**


	12. Chapter 12

**AN- WHAT? ANOTHER CHAPTER AS ****WELL ****AS DOING **_**EYES TELL (MOSTLY) ALL? What is the world coming to? **_

* * *

"_Sabina?" _the four men and one boy burst into Sabina's new room, all looking around wildly, guns drawn and pointing around the area, Alex slipping in past them.

"It's-it's OK," came a trembling voice.

Noticing the voice, they nodded sternly but didn't make another move until they had made sure nothing was out of place in the room; only then did they put their weapons away and move over to where Sabina sat on the floor next to her bed.

She sat huddled, her blue eyes wide and looking haunted, a pale pallor smeared across her face as she shivered and trembled, a blanket wrapped thickly around her shoulders, her pink lips open into puffing breath after puffing breath. She hardly glanced up at them when Wolf and Snake came to kneel in front of her, peering at her.

"What happened?" Snake asked, reaching out to try and uncover some of her face from the blankets to get a better look at her.

Snake was surprised when her hand suddenly latched onto his and squeezed tight. His eyes moved over to Alex who watched them silently and he realised why he was so shocked. He wasn't used to someone _responding _to physical contact when he made it. Sabina was completely different to Alex in that regard- she sought the contact out like it gave her life- like it was the sunlight and she was the flower.

Trembling fingers still wrapped around his hand, the girl shook her head and glanced at Alex. "I-I thought I saw in the g-garden...s-someone," her face seemed to go even more pale at the memory, as pale as a washed out lily and again, disconcertedly, her eyes fixed onto Alex. Then, before anyone could say something, she blurted out: "Alex! I-I need to talk to you!" her eyes flickered onto the others. "Alone," she said quietly, hand still squashing Snake's own.

Warily, Snake and Wolf exchanged glances.

Was that such a good idea?

With the way Alex and Sabina were acting around each other?

And none of them wanted to see Alex like he had been just a few moments before.

"Wolf," Sabina broke into their thoughts with gentle lockpicking. "I did listen to what you said."

Wolf's dark eyes flashed and he suddenly stood up, stormy grey eyes focussed on the girl still sat crouched on the floor. Nodding stiffly, he jerked his head to the rest of his unit. "Right. Come on, guys. Let's give them some space," and with that, he turned on his heel and strode from the room, Snake frowning and following after gently prising Sabina's hand off of his own.

Cub watched them leave and tried to reciprocate Eagle's encouraging smile as the man brushed past him before his eyes went to land on Sabina.

The door shut and Snake had to pull Eagle and Fox away from the door with a hiss of "stop being so nosy!"

Wandering down the stairs (albeit some reluctantly) they went to go and sit down and finish off the now cold pieces of pizza.

"What do you think that was about?" Fox murmured, eyes flickering up to where Sabina and Alex now were, talking about things that they couldn't hear.

"Sabina's scream?" Eagle shrugged but his brow was wrinkled in thought. "No idea. It had to have been more than just _seeing _someone in the garden, though." his face turned into a self-righteous grimace. "Maybe she chipped her nail varnish," he said childishly.

"Eagle," Snake warned.

Eyes angry, Eagle glared at the blond Scotsman. "_What? _She hurt Cub! Of course I'm a little mad at her," he snapped before dissolving into bad-tempered mutters.

"We don't know what they've been through, Eagle." Wolf growled. "It's not right to completely dismiss her just because you don't understand what's going on,"

Scowling (but relenting a little this time), Eagle shrugged again but refrained from saying anything else on the subject.

"We've still got Jack's- Alex's guardians number, right?" Snake stood up and stretched after nothing happened for a moment or two. The nods he got in return and muttered "in the kitchen drawer" made him nod in return. "Right, well, I'm giving her a call. I want to see what she knows about Alex's recent breakdown. Maybe he had medication for it, before,"

"Alright," Wolf muttered, trying to explain to Fox that it was _OK _to leave them up there alone.

Minutes later, Snake returned with a thoughtful look on his face and looked ready to say something- but he never got the chance.

A roar from upstairs made them all jump up once again.

"I _knew _we shouldn't have left them in there," Fox said quietly and burningly as they swiftly made to the stairs again.

It was proved unnecessary because the shouting match suddenly got louder and then there was a crash of a door opening and then pounding footsteps on the upstairs landing, more screaming and shouting and then a rush of footsteps that came down the stairs with even more shrieking and yelling following after.

Gaping, the four men watched as two teens exploded from down the stairs, yelling at each other. Alex's face was flushed again and he was storming away from Sabina this time, bellowing over Sabina who was doing her best at keeping her ungodly volume.

"You two-" Wolf's snap was almost _meek _under the terrible noise of the two teenagers.

It was near impossible to figure out what they were saying to each other as their volumes clashed and made so much noise that it was _deafening._

"QUIET!" all four men bellowed.

Once _again, _the voices stopped.

Chest heaving with exertion, Wolf pointed a finger at both of the teenagers. "You said a _chat," _he spat, fury rolling in tumulous colours in his eyes, fists clenched and _shaking _at his sides. "That was the _loudest chat I have __**ever **__heard!" _he shouted.

Neither teen looked cowed and still glared at one another, Alex stood (alarmingly, Snake and Fox exchanged glances and slowly slipped forward) by the door, his face contorted into one of fury. "I know you hate me," he snarled to Sabina, the amount of venom in his voice making the girl freeze. "But don't _lie to me about that!"_

"I'm _not lying!" _she screamed, taking a step forward. "You_ stupid __**idiot! **_I'm not _lying!" _

Wolf glared and made to cut in but the shouting match was starting again.

It was a blur when it happened. Everyone was yelling and shouting (and Cub's face looked so wild- like- like he could break at any moment that they just _knew _they had to tread carefully) and screaming and shrieking and screeching-

-and suddenly Alex had a gun out.

Everything froze.

The teen stood, shaking slightly, eyes oddly glazed but face frighteningly clear. As if he knew _exactly _what he was doing.

But that wasn't_ Cub _stood there.

It was- it was some sort of _machine._

Emotionless eyes pinned onto Sabina who lifted her hands slowly, eyes wide and face pale all over again.

"Cub...? Cub? What are you doing?" Eagle asked steadily, his face showing clearly that he didn't believe what was going on in the slightest. A slightly strangled laugh escaped from his mouth and he moved his eyes from the gun and back up to Cub. "Put the gun down, Cub,"

"Don't lie to me." Alex's voice was cold, gun never wavering from it's direction of pointing at Sabina, another dusty tremble shaking its way up his spine before he irately shook it off.

"I'm not lying," Sabina whispered, her lips dry.

"Put the gun _down, _Cub," Wolf ordered, taking a calculative step forward.

Cub's eyes flickered over to them, but in the main part, he stayed focussed on Sabina. "I said," everyone flinched as the safety was very purposefully clicked off.

"_Don't lie to me," _his voice was like a gale in winter and it even made Wolf, Fox, Snake and Eagle take a wary step back, some instinct in them screaming _danger! Danger!_

"You're not going to shoot me," Sabina said boldly, taking a step forward, her blue eyes locked onto Alex's brown ones. "You wouldn't,"

Alex didn't reply.

Sabina seemed to gain even more bravery from that and from the fact that she noticed Wolf gradually getting closer to Alex. "Don't you dare call _me, _a liar. Hypocrite."

Another tremble shifted its way through Alex and the glazed look in his eyes seemed to fill with something else that she couldn't discern. "It would be better if you were gone," Alex murmured, voice soft. As if he wasn't even talking to her anymore. The teen paused and his head jerked, a tiny frown passing over his face, lips moving. In a flash of coldness, Sabina realised that Alex wasn't even _talking _to her anymore. It was...it was like something was talking to him

"Better," he was speaking again, voice smoke on the wind. "It'd be _better _if you weren't here," his eyes were still clouded. "_Easier. _It wouldn't hurt. You-I- _no. _I don't want to do _that. _I just-" his eyes flickered and suddenly the gun that had been dropping shot up again and his eyes were blank. "Threat to health- _elimination," _his voice was soft but steely._  
_

Two things happened at once- but no one knew which one happened first.

Wolf, who had been slowly getting closer to Alex suddenly dived forward. And then there was a bang, Sabina screamed as she ducked down, the bullet slamming into the wall right next to her head.

Or maybe Alex's finger had tightened around the trigger and _then _Wolf had dived.

For the life of them, no one knew.

(But each answer made all the difference in the world.)

(And the thought of finding out was frightening.)

But it happened, whatever it was and the gun had skittered across the floor to be swept up immediately by Fox and Alex was dragged up by Wolf whose face was like a _thousand _raging storms as he bellowed in Alex's face.

"What the _hell _was that about, Cub?" he roared, the tiniest firefly flicker of fear in his eyes (which was understandable! He'd just seen a _boy _point a gun at someone with the amount of casualness of him _pointing someone out in a crowd!_) before it was swallowed up by his immense rage. His hands dug into Alex's shoulders whose eyes had turned back from their foggy shade and back into brown again. "You do _not _point guns at people! Where did you even _get that _from anyway?"

Alex's hands moved up to push the man away, a frown crossing his face- a childish expression which was creepy in the context of what had just happened. Trying to push Wolf off of him, he scowled. "Let go! It's none of your _business!" _

That was the wrong thing to say.

"Room. Now." Wolf's voice was icy cold.

The teenager stared blankly up at him before increduility made itself known in a mocking shade of amber in his eyes. "You can't do that." the teens voice was dangerous.

"Oh yes I can," the larger (stronger) man hissed, gripping Alex's arm hard. "Room. _Now,"_

Frenzy seemed to flash into Alex's eyes _("go to your room, child. Perhaps when you come out you'll feel a little more...willing to cooperate") _and the teen struggled away from him. "No! You can't _make _me!"

"Watch me," Wolf snarled and gripped the teen in an unbreakable hold, beginning to near drag the boy up the stairs.

"Get off!" he struggled and thrashed and shouted _(he struggled and thrashed and shouted) _but Wolf _wouldn't let go (but they wouldn't let go! And he was being pulled-) _and he was still being pulled _(to his 'room' and suddenly he was fighting tooth and nail) _though he fought tooth and nail _-(it wasn't _enough! _) _and Wolf easily flung open his door _(and he was thrown in) _the door slamming behind him _(and the darkness was suddenly crouching in a corner singing) _twisted lullabies to him _(in a torn and shredded voice-) _songs that _(he didn't want to hear) _and then there was a voice _("back so soon, Rider?")-_

The scream never left his lips.

(it's all in my head)

"This is ridiculous," Snake hissed, glancing at Sabina who sat with them, stubbornly refusing to meet any of their eyes. "The first _evening _and everything is already getting wrecked to pieces!"

"Maybe we should phone up-"

"And say what?" Fox interrupted Eagle though his voice held regret. Pressing his fingers into his forehead he glared at the carpet. "They made it completely clear that there was no way for us to back out of this!" he brought a fist up to his mouth and began chewing it. "_Crazy," _he hissed.

Silence pervaded in the area until Wolf came back down, his face stony.

"How is he?" Eagle asked after a moment of thick silence.

Wolf curled his lip at the question but answered nonetheless. "I don't even know." he spat. "Bringing out a _gun," _he hissed, fist slamming against the chair arm. "What the _hell _is going on in this house?"

Snake noticed the way Fox's eyes suddenly went wary and he narrowed his own eyes.

Fox _knew _something that he wasn't telling.

"You should go and check on him," the girls voice came out softly.

Eagle whipped round furiously. "I don't think _you're _the person who should be giving us advice on how to look after Cub!" he snapped, voice sharp.

Sabina flinched from the voice but carried on determinedly, her fingers tugging at her sleeves, hair falling over her eyes. "I mean that everytime..." she swallowed. "Dad tried to send him to his room he'd just...climb out of the window. Maybe- maybe you should just check,"

A pause ensued.

That sounded oddly like Alex.

"I'll go." Fox said immediately (that look still in his eye. Wary and thoughtful and a little _guilty_). "Maybe I can find out what's wrong, too," sharing a look with Wolf he nodded once and then left.

It wasn't long until they heard Fox yell "get _off _of the window ledge, Alex John Rider!" a slight scuffle, and then silence.

"Good call," Wolf muttered to Sabina, still not looking at any of them.

"What did you say to him?" Eagle finally asked, turning to look at the girl with hard eyes. "He was _better _before he went up to see you. What happened?"

Sabina swallowed again and briefly looked at them, even Wolf had torn his attention away from his dark thoughts and was focussing in on her.

Rubbing nervously at her mouth, Sabina's shoulders gave a little shrug. "I just told him who I thought I saw outside...and why it made me scream,"

Listening more intently, their lips stretched into a thin line. "Who did you see?"

Her eyes flashed up to them and then back down onto her lap again, some internal conflict waging in her mind- it was obvious through the tension on her brow and the way her hands fiddled on her lap.

"Sab-"

"Jack." Wolf's warning was cut off as she answered. Looking up, she fixed them all with a mixed confused, fearful and defiant look. "I saw Jack."

Frowning, Eagle waved his hand vaguely, prompting her to explain. "And that made you scream _why _exactly?"

Wolf and Snake gave each other curious looks.

Sabina stared at Eagle and her expression morphed into an angry scowl, her breath rasped in harshly into her lungs. "Because she's _dead," _she spat.

(Dead.)

What?

Eyes wide, they gazed at the dark haired teenager.

Snake's face had gone incredibly pale.

_Dead?_

Sabina watched them for a while, and the disgusted expression on her face gradually slipped off to reveal a surpirsed and bewildered one. Slowly, she turned her eyes over all three of the frozen soldiers. "No way," she breathed, leaning back. "Alex never _told you."_

Snake was the first to recover and he shook his head dazedly. "No," his voice was hoarse. "That's not possible." he was still shaking his head, shock still evident on his face.

"Why not?" Eagle asked faintly, hardly able to understand what he was being told.

He dragged one hand through his hair and then back over his face. "Because...I just spoke to her on the phone."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x (1)

* * *

When Fox entered Cub's room and he had safely gotten the boy off of the window ledge, they simply sat silently on the floor, backs against the wall and didn't speak.

A Hush curled around their feet, sharing their silence.

As minutes ticked by, Fox cast a look at Alex who sat stiff and still, his eyes fixed on the door.

"That was a bad move, down there, Cub," Ben said quietly.

Alex didn't react.

Shifting his legs up to his chest, Ben balanced one arm on his knees, and sighed softly into the silence. "You're going to have to tell them about your working with MI6 now."

"No," that certainly got his attention. Closing his eyes, Alex turned his head away from Ben, as if doing so would erase his presence and that of the words that Ben had recently spoken.

"If you don't tell them, I will," Ben said seriously, refusing to be ignored.

Alex didn't reply again and he remained with his head facing the other way.

"Where did you get that gun from, Alex?" Ben asked.

Turning around again, Alex fixed Ben with a look. "A while back..." he muttered, one hand pushing through his hair. "In the park when we were attacked. Someone dropped it,"

_In the park..._

Ben stilled as some memory tickled the corner of his mind. His eyebrows furrowed. What was it? It was right there...right _there._

Frowning at the carpet, Ben tried to bring it to mind.

Suddenly, he remembered.

_"We got tangled in a fight in the forest, but back-up came and quenched the threat- wounding one ad killing the other-"_

_ "There were no orders to kill the target," _

A soft gasp left Fox's lips, and his eyes flickered over to Alex who gazed back.

Pieces clicked into place.

But Fox was unsure whether he wanted to see the final picture.

"Ben?"

"Alex," face serious (and he saw how Alex noticed his expression and schooled his accordingly). "I want you to answer truthfully, now. No lies. Remember?"

Slowly, eyes narrowed, he nodded.

"Good." he paused. "Did you kill one of the men in the park?"

Alex's eyes went funny again but he still answered in his voice that strained on perfection. "Yes. One man and one woman."

Fox stared.

That was too easy.

Way too easy.

Where was the uncomfortable pause? The ashamed look? Even _trembling _would be alright for that moment!

"Right, OK," Fox said faintly.

"I shot them both."

"OK." he murmured.

"They died." haunted eyes stared at Fox-like lanterns swaying in the depth of a long deceased night. "Doesn't that scare you?"

(Yes)

Fox swiped at his dry lips with a tongue but forced himself to keep his gaze locked with Alex's. "A little, yes," gently, he touched Alex's shoulder when the teen began to turn away again. "But, Alex, you're not the only one who killed people. _All _of us have. You can't just blame yourself because of that fact. We were all in a dangerous position- it was a kill or be killed situation,"

"Kill or be killed," Alex repeated weightlessly, eyes trailing up to the ceiling.

"Kill or be killed," Fox agreed softly, attempting to gather Alex's starfall attention. "But, Alex. You can't just go pointing guns at people. It doesn't work like that." he hesitated, another thought swimming around in his head. "Alex...when did you learn to shoot?"  
Humming quietly, the teenager shrugged, voice like moonlight as he spoke. "Doesn't matter," his eyes were shadowy, walking in crumbling and lonely places that Ben thought Alex had no want to travel in. "It was a long time ago now."

Slowly nodding, deciding to leave it as that for the time being, he made to say something else but Alex seemed to not have finished speaking.

"Do you know why Mr Blunt decided to send me into school before he said he would? Why he decided to send S-Sabina here?"

Mutely, he shook his head, wary of the fact that words could frighten Alex back into silence.

A faint smile tickled Cub's lips but he remained gazing at the carpet. "It's because he's God," a weight fell around him and it suddenly seemed as if Alex was having trouble sucking in full breaths, his eyebrows crumpled and he pressed a hand to his forehead. "He's _God," _he choked.

Unable to bear such an expression (tortured- a slow and painful death) Ben reached out and tugged the teenager (boy, child) to his shoulder and buried his chin in the golden hair. "It's OK, Cub. It's _Ok,"_

"He controls _everything." _the teens voice was muffled and sounded damp- dewdrops dropping from a leaf tip. "Ben, I want her to _go away. _I don't want her to be here anymore,"

"I know, Cub, I know," Fox frowned above Alex's head, rubbing at the teens back and wondering at Alex's mood swings. This was more than usual teenage hormones. This was..._deeper. _This started with something that he hadn't been told; hadn't yet worked out. But what was it?

"I was going to kill _her, _too." the admission made Ben freeze momentarily, but it was only a lapse and his shoulders relaxed and he returned to murmuring words of comfort.

"Everything's going out of control," Alex whispered. "Everything's going wrong and I don't know how to fix it,"

"That's our job, Alex,"

The words weren't meant to be funny but it made Alex chuckle even as he pulled away from Ben's shoulder and leaned his head upon one hand, just examining the man and Agent.

His eyes sparkled with black stars. "That so?" he murmured.

Refusing to be daunted by Alex's full stare (too old for his age. It was like peering into a wizened galaxy, brimming with things his mind just couldn't comprehend) Ben levelled his own gaze. "Yes. Stop cutting yourself off so much, Alex. We're a _team. _If you have a problem, you need to tell us and _we _can work it out together. From now on, Alex, there's _no more _doing things alone. We work together. Deal?" he stretched out his hand purposefully and fixed Alex with a determined look.

For a while, Alex only gazed at the outstretched hand, a flicker of surprise on his face. But finally, a small smile slipped onto his face and he nodded, tentatively reaching out, his eyes flickering up to meet Fox's own, as if wondering whether or not Fox would pull back. When the hand didn't move back, the smile widened, apricot in colour as a tinge brushed his cheeks shyly and he grasped the hand and shook it firmly.

"Deal," came the paper kite word, ribbons tumbling down in rivulets of delicate marshmallow and duck-egg blues.

Smiling, near grinning, Ben nodded. "Well then, I guess you'd better go down there and apologise."

The smile on Alex's face dropped and he grimaced with a groan. "Oh _no."_

_x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x(2)_

* * *

Alex followed Ben into the livingroom with a not so neutral expression on his face, one that darkened even more when Fox told him to "stop pouting". Glaring at the mans back, he stepped into the livingroom with Ben and was surprised in the least to see the rest of K-Unit sat down talking in hushed voices.

From the look on Ben's face, it seemed that this wasn't how he'd left them either. Clearing his throat, he pushed Alex forward further into the room. "Cub's back,"

Eyes flashed onto him but Alex stood his ground, wary of the conspiratorial atmosphere in the room. "What're you talking about?" he asked instead of his apology.

"You haven't told us everything, yet," Snake was the one that spoke, and for some reason, his voice was hurt.

Nerves began making themselves known in Alex's stomach. "Of course I haven't. You knew that," his eyes moved to each one of the men in the room and he did his best to avoid Sabina's searching and hard gaze.

"You didn't tell them about Jack,"

Alex's eyes snapped onto her.

Self-righteous fury rolled and bellowed in his chest.

His eyes were flickering from cold to confused dangerously.

A hand on his shoulder stilled the raging feelings.

"There's nothing to tell," he growled instead, catching Ben's approving eye and trying to squash down the feeling of warmtinglyembarrassing that rushed through him at the look.

"No, Cub. There's a lot to tell," Snake's voice was weary. "Sabina told us who she saw outside,"

Alex's lip curled in derision. Oh, she _did _did she? Well that didn't matter! It was ridiculous! He didn't know _why _she was trying to hurt him _(yes you do, you little liar) _but that was the wrong way to go about it _(what you gonna do? _Kill _her?)! _But he quenched his thoughts down and stood in stony silence, waiting for Snake to continue.

"She said she saw Jack,"  
_Red hair, laughing eyes, smiling voice and scrambled eggs and pancakes._

"No, she _didn't," _he tried to snap back but his voice cracked and lost it's power halfway through. Screwing up his fists and _forcing _them away from scrubbing at his eyes, he glowered at Snake even though it wavered into devastated waters, eyebrows squirming, lips wriggling on his face, a hotchokypainful feeling squeezing his throat- squeezing- squeezing his throat and chest and- "She didn't," he wheezed. "Because- because she's at home making scrambled eggs!" he could see her there, bent over the frying pan, complaining of the wait as she sprinkled salt onto the dish, and- and she was still _there._

_ (Who was it that died when she left? Me, or her?)_

Sabina's voice was horrified as she spoke and Alex shifted away from the indigo words. "What's _happened _to you?"

"You _left _me." the words spilled out like muddy water before he could drag them back and choke on them. "They _all _left me." reeling the rest of his sentence back in on glassy threads, he spun them back to where they would forever coil and rest in his chest. "Why are you asking me this?" his voice was hoarse and he suddenly felt too tired to attempt to clear it.

Snake exchanged a glance with the rest of his team. "Because...Alex, I just spoke to her on the phone."

"That's impossible." Alex shot back immediately.

"Why?" Snake returned just as fast. "Can't she reach the phone from where she's in the kitchen?"  
Alex scowled at the man, lips pulling back into a brutal and animalistic snarl. "Don't _play _with me. I _hate _being played with." he said viciously.

"I'm _not _playing with you!" Snake snapped back. "Now, tell us. _Why _is it impossible?"  
Trembling in rage (why were they _doing _this?) he reared back. "Because she's _dead!" No! No she's not! _A howl in a windy place a screech and shatter of something made of glass. Alex clapped both hands over his ears _(deaddeaddeaddead red hair lying in a brighter red pool of-) _and his eyes filling with _(hot and uncomfortable "I'll make it better," she whispered, gently holding-) _and everything was suddenly _("JACK!")- _no! Falling, falling, tumbling _JackJackJack-_

-and then silence.

_(Jack?)_

Trembling, face wet _(Jack?) _he stared at nothing because- because Jack _wasn't _at home making scrambled eggs, was she? No, no, no...Jack was...gone.

_(put out the candle)_

Just...gone.

_(and the stars flicker and fall)_

And she'd left him.

_(all alone) _

All alone.

"Why'd she have to _die?" _his face was crumpled, fists scrubbing at his eyes, knees sinking, falling, sobbing, crying _(it's all a dream. A bad dream. Hush now. Close your eyes and it'll be better in the morning)_

Except- except it _wasn't _better in the morning and she was never _there. _He'd fallen asleep so _many times _just waiting to _see her there _but she never was _(never was) _and she _never would be again. _How many times- how many times could he wait for her to _come back to him?_

_ (it's all a bad dream)_

* * *

**AN- (1)- Coulda ended it here. It was a close call!**

**(2) coulda ended it _here!_**

**I know it's shorter than usual, but I kinda thought that this was the best place to end it. Don't worry, I'm planning on the next chapter coming out on either Saturday or Sunday. Just, you know. (Aren't I working hard? :D ) **

**Thank you for all of your reviews! Please don't stop!**


	13. Chapter 13

**AN- *Sidles in shiftily glancing around* Sorry...I did actually kind of get it done for next week but it was rushed and stupid. So, er...HERE YOU ARE! *Throws chapter at you and runs***

* * *

Lying on his side, Alex pulled the covers further up to his chin and listened to the sound of his soft breathing fill the depthless quiet with steady sounds of silver.

_Breathing, _Alex thought quietly, fingers curling around the sheets, _is not necessarily an indication as to being alive._

He couldn't sleep.

Not after that revelation.

Not after...not after being told _(lies) _things like that.

_They're messing with your head, Alex, _cold fingers rapped against his forehead, sour breath burning against his eyes. _Messing with it, playing with it like a toy. Isn't that what everyone does? Tries to play with you?  
Not them, _he screwed his eyes shut. _Never them._

And the thought reluctantly left him to settle in the back of his mind in heavy shades of black.

Sitting up (because there was no way he was going to be able to sleep with those sorts of thoughts running around his head) he pulled his legs out of bed and moved towards where he kept his uncle's box.

Pulling out the old sheets, he clicked on his lamp and stared at them under the pale light, running his fingers over the ink writing and sketchy diagrams.

Theoretical physics, Eagle had said a while back.

"_Utter nonsense. None of it makes any sense." _He had also claimed, purposefully pointing to a few of the equations and attempting to explain them to Alex. _"All in all, Alex, this paper is useless. There are a bunch of theoretical physics thrown in here along with equations and everything that is started is almost painfully common and amateur."_

He hadn't quite understood the things that Eagle had tried to explain, but he did understand that the papers were possibly pointless.

A distraction perhaps from the thing of real importance. Ian liked to do that. Ian liked to hide the real secret behind layers of complex things- thus taking the attention completely off of what he was really trying to hide.

It would be just like him to do it again.

But that begged the question: What _was _the thing of real importance?

Carefully, Alex pulled out the worn poem and held it under the light.

It had to be this.

The only remaining thing in the box.

But what did it mean?

_Jack and Jill went up the hill._

Jack had to be- had to be _his _Jack.

H-his Jack.

_My Jack._

He hesitated on the next thought but forced it to seep through all the same.

_My Jack who's gone now._

_ Gone. _

What a final word. The end. Just...gone.

And it wasn't _fair. Nothing _should be so final. _Nothing _as bright and as vibrant as Jack should _ever _be able to die and go. What had she done wrong other than live? What had she done wrong other than try and keep him happy, follow him to a place where she _shouldn't have _but she did because she was so full of that _damn love?_

_ ("Love will get you killed, Alex.")_

Shaking the thoughts off, he tried to focus back onto the matter of the poem.

But he just couldn't concentrate.

He needed to- needed to _move._

He needed to get up and _move._

Eyes moving to the window, he paused.

Snake had told him Jack had answered the phone. Sabina had told him that she had saw Jack outside.

And if indeed Jack was _(she's _not! _She's __**not!**__) _still somehow- still- still somehow- Well, wouldn't that mean she would be at home? Back at- back at home? Just sleeping, or reading, or staying up and peering at the window as he was doing, thinking of him and just wondering, wondering whether he was-

Alex was dressed and by the window before he even realised it.

_You're running from them again. _Something hissed. _You're breaking their trust._

_ I work alone, _he snapped back, a little feverishly tugging at his window and opening it to the night air. _I _need _to do this. _Ignoring further busy-bodied voices, he carefully pulled himself out of the window and made his way carefully along the ledge, shutting the window enough for it to look like it wasn't open, but easy enough for him to sneak his hand under and pull it open when he needed to get back.

Landing on the floor after maneuvering his way down to the ground, he moved quickly away from the house and into the night.

Moving again.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

The house stood stiffly in the darkness- as if it was afraid of touching the bat-winged night sky- desperate to stand apart from it and as its own entity.

Softly slipping the key into the lock, Alex clicked open the door and stepped into the dark hall.

It was cold.

_(Lifeless)_

Not bothering to wait for a call that _wouldn't come, _he swiftly made his way to the stairs, ignoring the throb in his chest and the way he lightly panted for breath, eyes moving constantly around as if he- as if he _expected _something wild and glorious to happen.

But he didn't. And the deathly quiet of the house was (was _not_) frightening him. Moving with liquid speed, desperate to either prove right or prove wrong, he found himself stood with taut back muscles on the other side of Jack's bedroom door.

_She's not here, _he thought angrily, pulling away a little and twisting his head to glare at his twitching, wrestling hands. _She's not _here! _I was _stupid _to come here! Like I- like I _expected _(hoped) something to happen!_

Hope didn't get you _anywhere. _It was a stupid, thoughtless thing to do and it- it was _futile. _Utterly and absolutely futile.

His hand moved falteringly to the door _(not because he hoped, simply because). _Fingers brushing against the (cold, unused) handle, he twisted once and pushed, the door creaking a hush to him.

Opening the door _(breath held, eyes wide, body suddenly shivery), _he slowly, hesitantly peered in.

Blinked.

Breathed out.

Closed his eyes.

Empty.

Stepping In _(ignoring the disappointment because disappointment was _ridiculous_) _he didn't dare flick on the light and flood reality onto the scene.

An unmade bed, frozen in one moment of life, cupboard doors slightly open and clothes still peeking out from inside the drawers.

It was like stepping back in time.

It was like standing in a grave.

Turning sharply, desperate to get out of here and lose its inhabitants of ghosts, Alex froze as he saw something pinned to the inside of Jack's door, the hand that had been moving to pull it open hanging limply in the air.

_**Tick-tock, Rider.**_

Breaths jerking, he reached out and tore the note from the door, staring at it in horror. What did it- what did it-

_**"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a-"**_

Nearly jumping in the air, Alex spun around to face what was singing the poem in a horrendous, grating voice.

There was a lump in Jack's bed.

_**"-went down and broke his crown-"**_

Hands over his ears he stared at the lump in the bed.

The noise was coming from that.

Rasping into the silence _(wanting the noise to _stop! _Make it _stop!) he staggered forward, eyes wide, mouth open slightly with serrated breaths tearing from his lungs, gasping panting, sucking in breaths _(alive. Alive alive alive) _and finally flinging the cover off of the bed.

Two dead eyes stared back at him.

He nearly screamed, stumbling back from the bed as the song picked up in its volume.

His back slammed into the wall as he pushed away from it, hands over his ears again, eyes filling, mouth moving-

_"Ah," _he whispered, hardly aware of the sound leaving his mouth. "Make it stop make it stop..."

What type of cruel joke was it?!

The doll- for that was what it was-the doll- the doll was made to look just like Jack.

Red woolen hair, glassy green eyes-

Rearing forward, trying to blank out the horrific song, he swiped at the doll and threw it hard against the wall.

He would have ran then.

He _wanted _to run.

He wanted to leave that room and just _get out of there._

But his overriding sense of _finding out _forced him to survey the room with sharp eyes, locking that terror away.

Someone had been in here _(run! Run! _A small voice whimpered. _Get away from here!) _as the doll was some sort of nasty and _manipulative _trick. It was- it was-

Leaning down, he peered under the bed, squinting and pulling his hand under the mattress to try and see if anything was there- any type of clue that would show just _who _it was that had played this trick on him and how they had _known _that he'd be here. Moving quickly, briskly much like a machine, he sat up and moved swiftly towards the curtains, checking the cupboards, the draws and ignoring the doll on the floor to the best of his ability; not even flinching when his foot kicked a green glass eye that had popped out, and sent it rolling across the floor.

Finding nothing _(just as Jack was now. Nothing), _he frowned, one hand softly shutting the cupboard door behind him and coughing lightly into his shoulder- desperate to muffle the sound.

_Maybe there's something in the doll._

His eyes moved down to it.

Something small and shivery inside him cringed.

He didn't want to _touch _that thing.

_Pick it up._

_ Maybe it's in the doll._

He bent down and swept it up.

One eye socket and green glass eye stared balefully up at him, woven mouth stretched into a taunting smile.

His heartbeat quickened, an odd heat flushing across his body.

Quickly now, palms going oddly clammy and cold, he moved to the door and was surprised when his knees shook beneath him.

Wheezing a little, he attempted to steady his trembling knees, glaring at his display of fear.

Hands flickering like frightened leaves by his side, he struggled to stand up straigh. Was he _that _scared? Gritting his teeth, desperate to move from the room, he tried again to stop the shivering in his legs. Surely that wasn't-

-His eyes widened as he fell to the floor; legs shaking.

Rasping in breaths, fingers shaking on the carpeted floor, he stared out into the darkness under the bed, screaming inwardly for his body to _move! _

Swallowing down his panic, he tried to stop the shakes that were racing up and down his body now; making his teeth chatter and his eyes go all funny and blurry.

A small green flashing caught his eye from within the sleepy folds of darkness.

Gasping for breaths, he rolled his eyes towards it; blinking when they watered and doing his best to focus on _just what that flashing thing was._

The blood in his body froze.

He remembered kicking something.

The glass eye.

The _green _glass eye.

It was leaking out gas.

Trying to poison him.

The eye winked at him from the corner of the room.

_**Get up! GET UP!**_

Eyes wide, his fingers clawed futilely by his sides, body hot and then cold, eyes burning, watering, mouth wide and gasping- gasping for (_**GET UP!) **_air and- and (_**move!) **_he couldn't _move! _He jerked against the floor, breaths sharp now, painful and _(you shouldn't have left, you fool, you shouldn't have left) _an odd rattling starting up in his lungs starting- starting up in his _chest _where his _heart _was and he _coughed _because he- because he- _**Get UP!**_

One flailing and flinching hand snapped the doll _(Jack) _into the side of the bed and suddenly the brutish and squawking song had started up again; loud, incessant and painfully sharp, its face peering up at Alex's whose eyes were locked on it (during his death throes) and its ugly face smiling at him- just _smiling _because it _knew _that it had him. It had him just where-

-his body was close to convulsing now, hardly able to breathe properly, choking on breaths that he wasn't even properly taking, liquid _(blood) _running from his nose- from his, from his-

And- and Jack still kept _smiling _at him- sm- _smiling _saying it's _all going to be better (and brushing his hair back from his face) _even though it _hurt so bad _now, she was still _(leaning down and smiling gently at him) _with that terrible, terrible face...and, and saying _("Let me make it better")-_

His lips moved, mouthing her name, mouthing- mouthing her name out into the open.

Perhaps her name was like a shooting star.

Perhaps- perhaps when he said it out loud, it would morph into a star and then- and then bring her to him-

-or maybe him to her.

Coughing now, something wet and sour in his throat, he could do _nothing _when footsteps came from behind him.

Do _nothing _when they stopped and hands reached down to him-

-and do nothing when he jerked and his heart felt all funny- all funny and a- and a familiar _(no) _a familiar _(no) _voice called-

"Not again."

Green eyes gazed down at him.

Alex's eyes blurred.

A soft _(no..._no) voice, lilted gently, musical _(like funeral bells and wind chimes) _toppled down towards him. "You shouldn't have come here, Alex." and a warm _(human) _hand that- that touched his head. "You can't _find _me."

A scream rolled rusting and shrilly but so _silent _in his chest- so_ silent _because saying it out loud- saying it- saying it out loud would be like- would be like screaming how everything was- everything _was-_

He choked on the liquid in his throat.

There was a blinding pain.

And suddenly-

-suddenly-

-nothing.

X-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

Eyes opened to see satin sunlight totter in unearthly beauty towards the far end of his room, it's floaty voice calling to _rise _so the sun could shine.

Alex did not rise.

Neither did he want to see the sun shine.

He closed his eyes instead, an odd soreness in his head and throat; a dryness to his mouth. His body felt achy, like he had been running somewhere and now his limbs were dragging him down and being stiff and stubborn in petty payback. Rubbing at the inside of his dry mouth with a thick and clumsy tongue, he coughed lightly, trying to rid the sour taste from his mouth.

Had he caught a cold?  
Screwing up his eyes, he shifted an arm to prop under his thumping head; to attempt to alleviate at least _some _of the pressure that seemed to be building up in there.

Moving his arm stiffly, he was surprised when his fingers brushed across something in his bed.

He stopped.

Slowly, his fingers caught around the object and he pulled it up and out of the rustling covers.

The object broke through the sea of material.

A one- eyed doll grinned up at him.

He hurled himself out of the bed, near panicking when the sheets tangled around his body.

Memories from last night came slamming back into his head and he clawed at his hair, stumbling into the wall to _get away _from that _thing _in his bed.

But it wasn't his bed.

He flung his head around wildly.

It wasn't even his _room!_

The walls were a wrong colour! The curtains were a wrong colour- blue. The carpet was the wrong-

A door clicked open.

His head swung round.

Sabina gazed at him in surprise, and then guiltily looked away.

"You're up." she murmured, more to the corner of the room than at him.

"Where am I?" he asked hoarsely, hyper-aware of that _monster _in his- no, not his- bed. When Sabina didn't reply, he pushed himself up, legs not working properly, shaking and trembling, not- not-

Propping himself up on the wall, breathing raggedly, eyes blurring and body going hot and cold he tried to glare at her, aware of the way his eyes plainly showed too much fear. "Where _am I?" _he asked in a violent demand. "I _asked-"_

"You're at home!" Sabina snapped, cutting him off. Blazing blue eyes pinned on him, trying to stare his shaking body down.

Mouth dry, he sucked in a trembling breath. "Home?" he managed to get out. His hand pushed against the wall as he tried not to show how ill standing was making him feel. Taking a moment to steady his erratic breathing, he gazed hazily at the blue curtains. "My curtains are green." he murmured.

Sabina's lip curled. "That was the safehouse," she said sharply. "This is your home. Or have you forgotten?" she asked brutally.

Alex's breaths were rattling weirdly in his chest, his fingers trembling and cold. Slow eyes swept across his surroundings- his old room _(when had it changed?), _he realised. "This isn't my house anymore," he said quietly, lips cracking and almost immediately going sore. He struggled to stand up properly and lurch towards the door. "This is a graveyard."

Sabina's eyes narrowed, her hands clenching at the door handle she was still holding. "You're actually _crazy."_

"Why are you here?" he asked shortly, too ill and tired to be dealing with arguments.

This time, a hard look slipped into her eyes and her lips pursed, standing up straighter and pointing her chin. "I followed you."

Alex blinked sluggishly, trying to process the words. "Why?" the word was merely a velvet murmur.

If anything, her lips pursed even more. She took a step forward; but her hand never let go of the door handle. "To make sure you wouldn't do what you did last time,"

_Last time._

This time, his legs gave out.

Collapsing in a softly gasping heap against the wall, he dropped his head against the _(wrong colour) _wallpaper and examined Sabina under half lidded and sore eye lids.

"I saw you leaving from my window."

Tired as he was, he still managed a dry smile- trembling as it was. "Do you camp out there?"

"I don't _sleep _very often." she barked back.

Too tired to find the energy to say how he hadn't had a sleep that was a _close-your-eyes-and-fade-away _sleep for months and years now, he merely kept silent, focussing on steadying his breathing and stubbornly quenching his desire to beg for _just a little _water.

"I can't _believe _you ran like that, Alex! I thought- I thought it was going to be like _then _all over again!" one finger pointed at him- and in his pained state, the finger seemed more like a dagger than a part of a human body. "They _care for you," _she hissed the words out as if she wished they could form needles and stab him. "You don't _deserve it _but they do. And you just ran!"

_Fought, _he amended almost dreamily. His conscience was being really severe today.

"So of course I followed you. Do you _really _think that I would just let you go and potentially do the _same thing _that you did last time? I don't think so. There's no _way _I'd let you do that! I followed you here but when I got here, the door was locked so I had to-"

_I didn't lock the door, _he thought in a barely there wisp. He _hadn't locked the door._

His head throbbed.

He couldn't think about this.

Not now.

Not- not-

-just not now.

"Sabina," he managed to cut in tiredly, his arms doing that unnatural tense and relax thing, stomach muscles clenching and then unclenching. "They're going to notice that we're both gone, you know,"

"I know." she muttered back, then she glanced at him and the hardness in her eyes lifted somewhat- infinitesimally; but it was something all the same. "But when I got in," her voice was quiet, meek, subdued like a champagne gold cornfield. "You were just lying on the floor and there was _blood. _And, and, _Alex. _I couldn't leave you there," she whispered, voice pained.

His breaths shallowed, eyes fluttering shut _("remain aware!") _as he struggled to remain fully awake. "Thank you," he murmured.

"I didn't do it for you." she snapped, twisting her lips down into a scowl. "Remember that."

"I-"

The rumble of an engine broke his words off.

Their eyes met.

"Here they come," Sabina said humourlessly, sliding off of the door, passing him a purposeful glance and nodding her head to the window.

Bracing himself, Alex gritted his teeth and used as much energy as he could to struggle upwards, the effort making him feel nauseous and light-headed.

"What are you doing?" Sabina asked sharply, finally moving away from the door to glare at Alex with nerves whizzing like flies through her eyes.

Alex didn't bother wasting any energy replying until he had fully straightened and stood on two less than steady legs. "Weird things are happening, Sab," he said quietly, his head throbbing and eyes going all odd and fuzzy. Staggering towards the bed, he sucked in a deep breath and lifted up the doll, staring into it's manically grinning face grimly.

"What's that?" Sabina whispered, hesitantly moving up to Alex's side and staring in disgust at the doll in his hands. Her eyes went wide as she took in the awful object. "That's just- that's just _sick! _Alex! Why did you make a doll of-"

"I _didn't!" _he snapped, glaring at her with enough force for her to look away and shrink slightly into herself. He disliked even _touching _the thing _("Monsters don't exist, Alex. Get some sleep," footsteps to a door. "But! Ian-" a shut door, fingers clutching at covers in the darkness) _and the mere thought of _making _it made him feel _ill. _"I _found _it when I came in here to see-" his voice cracked on the end and he clamped his mouth shut, eyes going hard and unwilling to continue.

"Jack," Sabina finished off in a whisper. "You saw Jack?"

"_I didn't see anyone!" _he snarled, spinning round to glare at her with burning eyes and pulled back lips, looking so ferocious that Sabina actually stumbled away from him. "_No one!"_

"OK! OK! I was just asking!" she defended herself, body feeling cold as fear swept over her.

His eyes cooled somewhat and he nodded, lips still thin and straight against his face. His eyes clouded and Sabina watched as he did that odd distant thing again; where he would close up and act like _someone else was in the room- _it wasn't normal.

Sabina swallowed.

It wasn't exactly...sane.

"Jack's...dead and someone's playing with me," he murmured, swaying a little on his feet. "Someone's _playing _with me. I need to be in control. I can't- I can't let what happened last time take over. I can't," he said softly though Sabina was sure he wasn't exactly talking to her.

She glanced to the window where no doubt K-Unit would be outside, coming in soon. Swallowing _(don't be stupid! You and Alex are _enemies _now! Don't get yourself involved with him again, you idiot!), _and chewing at the inside of her mouth, Sabina spoke quickly and intensely before the screaming voice in her head could win over the other voice. "If you leave quickly through the window, then you can maybe try and find out what's happening. But I'm coming with you. I still don't trust you,"

Sharp eyes pinned onto her.

She froze.

It was like being gazed at by the amber eyes of a tiger; knowing that it knew your every weakness, every part of you that it could thoroughly tear to shreds in no time at all.

It was terrifying.

But, the look subsided and Alex nodded once, tersely, one hand tightening around that ugly doll in his hands. "OK," he agreed, and then, tentatively, he smiled at Sabina.

She nodded sternly, but pretended not to notice the smile, instead walking determinedly to the window. "Come on, then," she called over her shoulder, pushing open the window and climbing out.

Soon, they were walking quickly down the streets, Alex directing her through the hidden walkways so as to avoid detection.

"You're going to be in trouble when we get back," Sabina felt the need to say.

Alex's breathing was not all that great as he replied. "Same goes to you,"

There was a brief and slightly cold silence after that, Sabina following Alex but still too wary of the teenager to want to start up a conversation by asking _where they were going._

"'6,"

Sabina glanced at Alex as they skirted past some parked cars and onto a relatively busy walkway.

He turned those cool brown eyes onto her and she forced herself not to shiver or demand he turn away. "'6. That's where we're going," he didn't look all that good. His eyes were the wrong dilation and his breathing was laboured and a little rattly.

"Right," then, her curiosity got the better of her. "What happened when I wasn't there?"

It seemed to be the wrong question to ask because his face, if anything, withdrew further into itself, hos voice going raspy and slightly hoarse. "When was that? When I came back to England or when I went into the house?"

"Don't be smart," she growled, stalking on ahead. "You know what I mean. And stop making out that _you're _the victim to all of this!" she muttered a quick apology to someone when her angry strides nearly brought her crashing into them.

To Sabina's surprise, when she turned round to see if Alex had anything to say to that, he was walking slowly, face pale and one hand clasped over his mouth and nose.

She stopped in the middle of the path, looking uncertainly at Alex who just stood there, eyes all foggy again. "Alex?" she asked hesitantly.

He made no move to reply.

Getting a little anxious now, she moved slowly closer to him, the whizzing of cars in her ears as well as the gradually increasing tempo to her heartbeat. "Alex?"

"Can we..." his voice was faint, breaths a little wet. "Please move a little slower?" a droplet of blood dropped like a small ruby from underneath his clasping hand.

The breath left Sabina and she was close to yelling out when Alex quickly shook his head at her, eyes giving a very clear indication to _shut up._

_ "Alex," _she breathed, scared now. "You're _bleeding,"_

"It's nothing," he said brusquely, though Sabina noticed that he didn't move his hand. "It's just a nose bleed. We need to go-"  
Sabina jumped as her mobile started ringing.

Alex stared at her.

K-Unit.

"We're in so much _trouble," _she whispered, hand reaching for the phone.

"What are you going to say?" Alex asked quietly but forcefully, his eyes staying locked on her hand that drew the phone out of her pocket.

"The truth," she snorted, but her eyes held doubt as she took in Alex's less than healthy form. She bit her lips as she took him in with her eyes. "Alex, you're unwell. You need to go to the hospital," she flicked the phone open, Alex shaking his head again, eyes narrowed.

Turning away from him so she wouldn't feel pressured by his burning gaze, she winced as she answered the phone. "Hello?" she said meekly and then cringed at the reply on the other end of the phone. "It's OK...no...I'm with Alex but he's not very well...we can come back if you want...we're not far," she turned to tell Alex that they wanted to speak to him and then she blinked.

Alex wasn't there anymore.

The voice at the other end picked up in volume as she didn't reply to the question.

Faintly, Sabina stared at the spot Alex _had once _been in.

Cursing softly and under her breath, she snapped the phone back to her ear. "He's gone to 6 without me."

* * *

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Alex couldn't believe that Sabina had been able to follow him last night without him even noticing.

_It's not your fault, _Reason soothed, _You were hardly thinking straight at the moment._

His lips pursed and he forced his aching body to walk a little faster (that dreaded doll still hanging from his fingers) as Reason's attempt to calm him _did not help. _He had been _fine! _Why didn't anyone get it that he was _OK?  
_

A wet cough escaped from his mouth and he quickly clapped his hand over his mouth to catch the trickle of red _(like strawberries and kites! And everything-) _that fell from his lightly gasping mouth. Steadying himself, nodding at a woman's concerned gaze towards him, he pressed forward in determination, the doll swaying, swaying like a pendulum by his side as his eyes fixed onto the Royal and General Bank and it's glass doors with all the focus of a wander who had finally met his goal after 50 long years of travelling.

As such, he hardly remembered the steps he took up into the Bank, or even how he managed to find himself reaching out towards the door of Mr Blunt's office.

But there he was, suddenly stood in front of there desk and holding out a doll for them.

"What's this?" he near rasped, the room tilting dangerously.

Mr Blunt's flat eyes took in the limp doll before rolling up purposefully to the worlds youngest Agent. "I believe it is a doll," he near drawled.

Alex pulled his lips back in a tired (but still savage) growl. He shook the doll a bit and stumbled forward just through such a tiny movement. "_No," _he snapped, shaking the doll again. "This is _Jack," _

"Take a seat, Alex." Mrs Jones said coolly.

Alex stared at her.

There was _two _of her.

"Which one of you is real?" he murmured, brows pulled down into a frown, words forming like soap bubbles.

"Excuse me?" two eyebrows arched, each Mrs Jones gazing at him in confusion.

"I think I'll sit," he said faintly, dropping into the chair and holding the doll away from him as much as possible.

"Quite," Mrs Jones agreed.

"The doll," he had to pause to catch his breath, eyes fluttering shut.

There was a brief silence in which Alex sat still in the chair; still and silent.

"Alex?"

His eyes opened, lashes flickering and lips puffing out to form rattling breaths. Blankly, he gazed at the two people sat in front of him. "The doll," he raised it up and stared at it, squinting. "Las- last night I went to the house," _(Why was he telling them this when he _resented _them?) _"and- no- to look around. To look around because Snake and Sabina said that they'd seen and heard Jack." he ignored the incredulous raise of the eyebrow from both of Mr Blunt and Mrs Jones. "So I went...but when I went there was this doll in Jack's room and when I threw it-" he decided not to mention his mimor panic attack or _why _he had thrown it against the wall. All unnecessary information. "-the eye fell out which turned out to be some sort of gadget to leak some sort of gas that knocked me out. When I woke up, I was in my bed and the doll was with me."

Mr Blunt held out his hand, and accordingly, Alex dropped the doll into it; not sad to see it go.

Silence passed as Mr Blunt examined the doll under emotionless eyes.

Finally, the man spoke. "Interesting."

"What?" Alex asked, feeling the effort of only getting that word out.

Mr Blunt did not reply, but merely gave it to Mrs Jones to show to Alex, and then went back to gazing dully at the teenage boy.

With cold fingers, he took back to doll and followed with his eyes where Mrs Jones directed he look.

The blood froze in his veins.

Stitched onto the bottom of it's foot where its shoe had not been taken off and lay a little eerily on Blunt's desk, lay the word: **Bi**rdcage**E **and a symbol of a birdcage in tiny embroidery.

Alex choked on a fresh wave of blood from his throat.

Clenching one _(not _shaking) hand over his bloodied mouth, he could only stare in horror at the thing in his lap.

They were _everywhere._

_ ("There's no escape, Alex," cold fingers ghosting across his jaw, a bloody moan into the darkness. "You should know that. Your whole world is a Birdcage. Remember that when I-") _He slammed away from those thoughts and concentrated on breathing, his jaw trembling though. "What do they want?" he croaked before anger filled him. He turned blazing eyes onto Blunt and Jones. "This is _your fault," _he hissed. "If I had never _known you..." ("If I had only never _known _you! This is _your _fault!" screaming voice and whipping hair, hands pushing and clawing, sobbing and shrieking and there was blood. Blood, blood, blood)_

A humourless sound left Blunt's lips as he tapped a finger against his desk. "Please, spare me your speech of loathing and blame." his eyes dropped to freezing, voice cold. "Isn't this _your fault, _Alex?"

His heart jerked uncomfortably _(and she was looking at him with _those eyes _again. Full of blame and _yourfaultit'sallyourfault_) _in his chest and he sucked in a breath. "I didn't do anything," he whispered, eyes stretched open as he gazed at Mr Blunt. "I _didn't!"_

"Ah, but you did, didn't you?" Mr Blunt said quietly, his voice taking up all of the focus of Alex's attention. "You went to America-"  
_"Didn't," _Alex whispered.

"-went to the Pleasures and put them in danger-"

_"_I _didn't," _he pleaded, hands snaking up to his hair.

"-and then caused all of this mess and refuse to tell anyone about it." Mr Blunt's eyes bored into Alex's. "Foolish, foolish, child," he said, voice low, voice hard, his voice _painful._

_ ("Foolish child," it was hot! Burning! He was burning and twisting and turning and-)_

"America was a mistake!" the words were tumbling out before he could help it. "America was a huge mistake. I should have stayed- I should have- I should have-"

"Remained with us," Mr Blunt interrupted.

Dazedly Alex shook his head. "No- _no, _not that. I didn't _want _to stay with you. I wanted- I wanted a fresh start-"

"Which is now impossible for you, Alex," Mr Blunt once again cut in but he did it so effortlessly that it seemed as if he _hadn't _cut in and that you were merely the one who had stopped talking. He brought his chin down onto his entwined fingers propped up on his desk by his elbows, eyes scanning Alex. "You should know by now that there is no such as a 'fresh start' for you,"

"Stop it," he snapped, slamming his hand against his armrest. "Stop _talking _and trying to _manipulate me!" _his eyes glazed over. "They _are, _Ian. They _are _trying to manipulate me," he whispered.

Bored eyes gazed at him. "We need to issue you a psychologist,"

Alex paled. "_No!" _he practically shouted, almost raising out of his chair. "_No! _I'm _fine!" _he didn't _want _people poking around in his head! He didn't-

Mr Blunt ignored him. "We thought you wouldn't need one as perhaps K-Unit could fill that place,"

"They _have!" _but Mr Blunt was pretending he hadn't spoken, face impassive as he spoke, eyes not fully taking Alex in.

"I don't believe that, Alex." he droned, Mrs Jones remaining silent for the time being. "We issued you K-Unit with the hope that they'd be able to cure your...ah...obvious detrimental mental health issues,"

_"I don't have mental health issues!" _he cried, jerking forward in his chair.

The man breezed on as if he hadn't spoken (and Alex felt a chill rush down his spine. It was like the beginning _all over _again!). "But, it seems that they haven't cured you as I believed they were able to neither have they seemed to have kept you safe," he gave a pointed look at Alex's mouth which had begun trickling blood again as well as his nose.

"They _have!" _he reached out to Mr Blunt with cold fingers, grasping at the air. "They-"

"Thus it seems to me that the best thing-"

_"No!" _he near moaned.

"Is to take you away from K-Unit-"

"No." he hissed, hands clenching by his sides.

"-and into the care of a psychiatrist and another, more capable group or Agent,"

"You can't," Alex said calmly, having managed to contain himself as Mr Blunt spoke.

"You need a hospital. You've been poisoned," Mrs Jones pointed out. "I hardly believe that at this moment in time your opinion is very valid,"

It was Alex's turn this time to ignore them. "You can't do that. You can't just put me with someone and then take me-"

"I can assure you," Mr Blunt cut in, his voice dry. "We can."

"They've looked after me," he tried a different route this time. "Really well. And I never ran away from them. That means something."

Mr Blunt did not look impressed with his comment. "It means little. This is the second time you've run away from them, Alex. To me, it seems like their job of protecting you has been done poorly. You bring this upon yourself. Perhaps if you just found a time to sit down and stay still, you wouldn't find yourself in all of these problems,"

Alex's head spun. How was this even happening? He'd only come in here to talk about _Jack! _"But I _could never _stay anywhere! I can now!" saying that they _couldn't make him _was ridiculous and lying to himself. He knew they could do whatever they damn well pleased. "Just _don't _take me away from them, not these,"

"I said I would give you the box if you'd proved yourself,"

Alex froze.

_ The box._

Forcing his eyes not to go and meet Mrs Jones, he pulled a hurt expression. "I _have," _he said, vocie low. "I've proved myself,"  
Mr Blunt's eyebrows arched upwards. "What an interesting way of proving yourself."

"How can I prove myself?" he leaned forward, eyes harsh. "_How?"  
_

Mr Blunt leaned forward too, eyes just as harsh. "Finish up what you started and then come back to us." his eyes wandered before resting coldly on Alex again.

"Then you can stay with K-Unit and avoid the psychiatrist."

Alex's mouth went dry.

_ Blackmail._

Mr Blunt pulled back and away from Alex, eyes flashing like dulled metal from behind his glasses. "That's your first mission, Alex. Clean up the mess you made."

Alex's head spun and he tried to grasp his thoughts as much as he could. Oddly, it was a difficult thing to do when he'd just recently been poisoned. But...selling himself to Blunt again? Selling himself to MI6?

_And for what? _A voice hissed angrily. _Some sort of _family? _You _know _that a family doesn't exist!_

But that would mean he'd be _alone _again if they left.

_Alone._

"It's your choice, Alex."

_("Attachments are a weakness,")_

He wished he'd listened.

He was attached.

"I'll clean it up," he said almost inaudibly.

He did not miss the tiny flash of triumph that brushed across Blunt's eyes. "Good. Now, I believe your guardians are waiting to see you," he pressed a finger on the button on his desk. "Allow them entry,"

_x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x_

* * *

Alex stared at K-Unit as they stared at him.

"Alex needs to be taken to the hospital," Mrs Jones said detachedly. "He has suffered a poisoning,"

Right on cue, the nose bleed that Alex thought he had already stemmed came flooding back again, making his eyes blur.

K-Unit were immediately by his side, helping him up and noticing the doll that hung creepily in Alex's feeble grip. Choosing not to say anything, they nodded once to Mr Blunt and Mrs Jones, and briskly swept the teen out of the office and into the car.

Alex's head lolled against the shoulder of whoever was sat next to him, but he felt too dazed to care for his pride at the moment; even allowing whoever the hand belonged to press a tissue to his nose and tilt his head back.

"I don't even want to know," he heard Wolf mutter from beside him somewhere.

"Sorry," he murmured, barely aware of the word leaving his mouth.

"Forget it, Cub," it sounded like Snake's voice.

"No," Alex struggled against the hand on his nose but was pushed back down again as he started wheezing. "I _mean _it. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gone but I needed-"

"I said: forget it," the voice was warm, though and unconsciously, Alex relaxed. "We should've known that you would've done something like that straight after...well. Just...don't do it again,"

Alex pretended not to hear the last part.

There could be no promises.

He was going back to MI6.

A shiver ran through him.

Jack, on his lap, smiled back.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

"There was already part of the antidote still in his bloodstream when we tested a sample of his blood. From there, it was easy to mimic the antidote and give it to him."

Wolf blinked at the Doctor and then frowned. "He already had the antidote in his bloodstream?" he repeated slowly.

"That's what I said," the man- Doctor Forster- called pleasantly as he bustled around Cub, fussing over him in a way that suggested he knew the teenager and had seen him more than once; developing a fondness for him in that time. "You're a lucky boy, Alex Rider," the man said as he leaned over to secure the drip into Alex's arm, the boys eyes watching. "Whoever gave you the antidote saved your life! Any longer and you would've been dead and gone." his eyes weren't as pleasant at that part of the speech- more grim and a little angry looking.

Cub averted his eyes. "Yeah," his voice was quiet. "I was lucky,"

"Who was it, then?" Eagle asked curiously, sitting on one of the chairs by Alex's bed with Snake and Fox lounging on the other two, Wolf preferring to stand. "Who gave you the antidote?"  
The teenager shrugged. "I don't know," he admitted (or seemed to admit. Wolf's eyes narrowed).

"You sure?" he barked.

Cub turned his head to glower at him. "I. Don't. _Know," _he bit out.

Wolf opened his mouth to retort, but the Doctor cut in.

"Now, now. Enough of this," he waved a hand at them both. "You-" he pointed to Wolf. "Need to calm down," he ignored Wolf's dangerous glare and turned to Cub. "And you need to stop bringing yourself in here. I thought that I told you the last time I saw you that I don't want to deal with anymore wounds on you, my boy! Repeat after me:" turned the other way, he didn't see K-Units confused glances at the statement of Alex being in the hospital a lot.

Cub's face twisted into a childishly stubborn expression that was oddly endearing. He turned his head away. "No,"

Doctor Forster sighed and rolled his eyes in exasperation before winking at K-Unit. "Come now. I've cleaned all of your various battle wounds. I'm sure it wouldn't hurt to humour an old doctor like me,"

Cub didn't reply, but it seemed to the increased furrow to his frown that he had relented.

"Good," the Doctor beamed, seeming to have gotten the same impression too. "Now then: I."

"I," he muttered after a slight pause.

"Will not," the doctor prompted.

"Will not,"

"Be in the hospital,"

"Be in the hospital,"

A smile wreathed his slightly lined face. "Anymore,"

"Anymore,"

"_As-" _he held up a finger when Cub relaxed.

"As," he repeated sarcastically.

"Now I have,"

"Now I have,"  
"Guardians who will look after me and do the heroics,"

Wolf looked at the Doctor.

His face was soft, gentle sadness tripping in his eyes in breathy waves. "Yes?"

Cub looked stiff as he sat there gazing back at the Doctor with that usual blankness on his face.

"I'm tired," Cub said softly, eyes losing their focus.

The sadness in the Doctor's eyes seemed to increase, but he nodded all the same. "Of course, Alex," he turned to Wolf and his unit members. "Come on, let's give him some rest and peace."

When they left, Cub didn't once look up.

Shutting the door behind him, the Doctor pressed a finger to his lips and ushered them all to a different room where he then proceeded to shut the door and quickly glance about.

"Is something the matter?" Snake asked, leaning against an examination table as he watched the Doctor's search.

"Just checking," was the vague reply before the man finally stopped pushing things out of the way and came to stop in front of them, his arms folded across his chest as he eyed them all critically. "Alex's new guardians?"  
"Yes," Wolf answered, a little uncomfortable about being pushed around the place by this greying doctor.

The man nodded sharply before drawing up a chair and sitting on it, significantly lowering the slightly uneasy atmosphere. "That's good," he nodded again; as if he agreed with his words. "Yes. That's very good,"

Exchanging glances, Wolf slammed his elbow into Eagle's stomach when he brought up a finger to the side of his head and drew circles, indicating that he was crazy. Ignoring Eagle's plaintive whines, he turned to the musing Doctor. "You mentioned before that Cub had been in hospital a lot." he trailed his voice off expectantly.

"Oh, yes. More times then I'd like to remember." the Doctor sighed and cast them all a furtive look before leaning in a bit with a low voice. "I can't tell you much, do to the information being classified...but do you think there's anyway that you could stop him from...doing what he's doing?"

Wolf frowned at the man.

_Doing what he's doing?_

"What do you mean?" Snake asked slowly, not understanding either.

"You know," the Doctor made some wild gesture with his hands. "_MI6 business," _he muttered from the corner of his mouth, still glancing around the stealthily. "I take it you know so it won't be breaking the OSA, but, really, if you could do so, it would be incredible,"

Wolf could only gape at the man.

_MI6 business._

The gears clicked into place.

Cub was _spy._

The cold eyes...the gun...the snowboarding down a mountain...

He was an _Agent._

Looking at the other faces of his men, it seemed like they had finally got it to.

The Doctor, oblivious to the fact that these men _didn't _indeed know about Alex's work, carried on blithely. "He's such a lovely lad, really. But I can see what the job's doing to him. I don't know _what _they think the child is- some sort of dog or robot, I don't know- but it's not healthy for him-mentally or physically," he shook his head in disapproval, eyes regaining that look of utter distaste that they had held not too long before. "Using a child for that sort of work," he muttered darkly. "What next?" finally, he looked up at the men. "I would suggest that you keep a close check on the boy at all times. It's horrific to think that through all of this, he's never once had mental therapy. But hopefully you can take care of that?"  
Wolf was too much in a daze to do anything other than nod and accept the scrawled on piece of paper that the Doctor slipped over to him, explaining that it held a few names of good therapists that they could maybe call.

"And look after him," the Doctor said as he bustled the men out of the room, telling them to go and see Alex. "Goodness knows he needs a little bit of looking after in his life," then with one short "harrumph" he had nodded once again and strode away, leaving the four men stood awkwardly in the squeaky clean hall.

"Did he just say what he think I said?" Eagle breathed after a moment's silence.

"It should have been pretty obvious, looking back on it, now," Snake muttered, staring at the shiny white floor.

"Then...what do we do about it?" Eagle asked quietly.

No answers were forthcoming.

Heads turned to gaze at Wolf.

He shook his head, face troubled. "We should go and see Alex,"

"And tell him that we know?" Snake asked, following after Wolf as he began to stride towards Alex's room, the lights reflecting like miniature sunbeams against the starkly clean floors and walls.

Wolf grunted. "Well, why not?" he turned serious eyes onto them all. "We'll do the opposite of Cub and just come straight out with it,"

The men nodded, though Wolf did notice that Fox was oddly subdued as they walked and made a note to query him about it later.

X-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

Alex was not surprised when the door to his room opened.

He was not surprised when the four military men strode purposefully into his room.

He _was, _however, surprised at the statement Wolf blurted out.

"You're a spy."

Sabina, sat in the corner of his room snorted whilst Alex merely blinked. "Took you long enough," she said, legs curled up beneath her as she played on her phone.

"Is that a problem?" Alex asked heavily, choosing to ignore Sabina for the time being. He hadn't lied before. He really was tired. Tired and confused over this whole mess and just _how _he was meant to clean it up.

Wolf, Eagle and Snake stared at him like he'd just admitted to being their mother.

"Well..." Wolf near spluttered, his face turning slightly red (from frustration and irritation, Alex surmised). "I don't know. Is it?"

"I don't know," Alex said distantly, gazing at his hands against the white fabric of the pristine hospital sheets. "Is it?"

"We want a straight answer, Cub!" Wolf demanded sharply.

"To what?"

"Don't be cheeky," Wolf warned.

Shutting his mouth, he turned his head away and gazed at the far wall. "Yes, I used to be-" _(You still are, you fool) _"-a spy," he shook his head at the voice. It wasn't _real. _

"Used to be?" Eagle repeated, stepping in further to the room, watching Alex cautiously.

"He still is," Sabina butted in before he could speak.

"Am _not!" _he said sharply, his fists bunching the sheets under his hands. _(Liar, liar, pants on fire, hang them up on a telephone-) _"I'm _not." _he repeated, calmer. "I stopped a while back,"

"You are such a _liar!" _Sabina had stood up.

"Not again," Snake muttered.

She didn't seem to hear him and pointed a finger at Alex. "You _never _stopped being a spy! Even when you came over to America when Jack died, you were _still _a spy! How many more people will it take to die and get hurt for you to realise that you should just-"  
"Quiet."

Sabina stilled at Alex's voice.

It was quiet, but focussed. Like some sort of silent and hidden sword. His eyes pinned onto her again with that animalistic but so _human _intensity, his face impassive, almost bored. "You're always _talking," _(his voice was haunted, and Sabina wondered again whether he was talking to her) "Talking and talking. Just _be quiet."_

She was quiet.

Finally, those diamond eyes turned from her and settled on K-Unit. "I would've told you," he muttered, tugging at the sheet in his more relaxed hands now.

They didn't seem like they knew what to do or say _(they never knew what to do or say around him. Liz Pleasure always looked uncomfortable; as if he was ready to snap at an given-) _about the matter, and so, after a few moments of passing round looks at each other, they eventually nodded- albeit a little reluctantly.

Alex was glad.

He had more pressing issues to deal with than that at the moment.

_Shoulda left them when you had the chance, _something sang.

He ignored it. He had _done the right thing. _He _had. _

_You'll get them killed, _the voice whistled again, sounding morbidly cheery for such a statement.

_You're not real. I refuse to talk to you. I _refuse. He said firmly, mouthing the words as he gazed at the white sheets, wondering whether just _being _in something so clean would get them dirty. Absently, he flicked at the material, humming vaguely under his breath. Maybe not. Maybe so. Who knows?

He had been poisoned.

By the Birdcage.

By the _Birdcage._

By the-

No.

Don't think about it.

Don't-

The _Birdcage._

_ (It was dark here. Dark when it shouldn't be dark. The wrong type of dark. The dark that was not eyes-closed dark, or night-is-now-here dark or even welcome-sleep dark. It was ugly, forceful, _wrong _dark. And he shouldn't _be _here. He shouldn't _be _there just lying- just _lying _on the ground with a- with a gag in his mouth and a blindfold around his eyes and a chain fastening him back._

_ And those footsteps _shouldn't _be prowling around him, that voice _shouldn't _be whispering to him._

_ "Let me tell you a story, my child,"_

_ He wanted to say that he _wasn't _his child. He wanted to say that he didn't _want _a story but he was so _tired _and so _hurt _and so _tired.

_So the man continued. "It was a story that began long ago...")_

"Can I leave now? I feel much better," Alex said quickly, breaking the decaying chains and snapping to reality.

"Well...we'll have to ask the doctor," Snake said, looking Alex over with a piercing eye.

"Please," he said quietly, suddenly feeling cold even though it was _warm _in there. Warm and- warm and-

_Hot! Hot like fire that was rushing and howling all over-_

"Please," he repeated, a little more desperately.

It seemed to do the trick.

"I'll be right back," Snake said, and quickly left out of the room.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

It didn't take much to convince the Doctor to allow Alex to leave after a promise to stay out of trouble and trust in his new guardians.

Soon, they were driving aimlessly around, Eagle, who was driving, arguing that he wanted to go out somewhere and the four squashed into the back generally not too happy about it.

"I'm sure this is illegal," Fox muttered, glancing at Sabina who sat wedged in between him and Snake (it had been decided that squishing Alex and Sabina together _probably _wouldn't be the safest idea).

"Get over it," Eagle said cheerily, turning and whooping as he spotted his goal. "I'm sure as a spy you've done loads of breaking the law things."

"Sure," Fox muttered. "But back then, I was working _as _the law."

"Ooh, get you," Snake whistled mockingly. "Huge ego, much?"

Fox "hmphed" in fake arrogance. "Don't be jealous, please,

"Sorry, your highness," Snake bowed his head a little.

Sabina looked highly uncomfortable as they turned and she pressed into Fox more, glancing over, she caught herself watching Alex who hadn't spoken much at all after being taken from the hospital.

He looked as if he was walking in a dream rather than walking in real life. He was blowing softly _(childishly) _on the glass and drawing patterns in the condensation, murmuring things under his breath and not even reacting when the car brought him squashing into Snake.

It was eerie.

"Have you gone back to school yet, Alex?" she found herself blurting out. Something, _anything _to get him to _stop _acting like that.

Her voice seemed to break him out of whatever daze he was in, and he turned misty eyes on her. "Yes," the fingers inched back towards the glass, the pink tips of them already damp from the water. "I went back a while ago now,"

Licking her dry lips, extremely conscious of being listened to in case she said something she shouldn't, she spoke slowly. "So...meet Tom again?"

"Yeah," a brief flicker of a candlelight smile brushed across his lips. "He's the same as ever. Loud, silly. He hasn't changed."

The comment seemed to hold more into it than Sabina could interpret, and she hurried on quickly (and a small part of her was _glad _that they could speak like this. Speak neutrally). "You never used to talk about him that much back home,"

Alex smiled again. (Did it reach his eyes?) "No." the fingers were back to slipping towards the glass. "I didn't like bringing my two lives together. America was America and London was London,"

"That didn't work out very well, did it," the biting comment slipped out before she could help it.

His face seemed to crumple a little.

"Sorry," she said quickly before pausing and wondering why she had done so. It was- it was just that Alex looked so _small _then. Like a small child. She wasn't used to seeing him like that.

"Doesn't matter," his voice was tired. "I suppose you're right." and the fingers were back to drawing mindless (or were they mindless?) patterns in the condensation again, and he was away to whatever place he wandered when he wasn't walking the world of the living.

The rest of the journey was spent in mild conversation and a hollow quiet from Alex.

When Eagle finally did park up, it was at the park that they had attempted to have a picnic at last time before things went rapidly downhill.

"Here?" Wolf grumbled.

"Here." Eagle agreed, unclipping his seatbelt.

Trooping out of the car, the unfortunate ones who had to sit in the backseat stretching and groaning, complaining of cramped muscles as Eagle merrily led the way to the same spot they had chosen last time, Alex firmly watched by Snake and Fox, the aforementioned seeming oblivious of the scrutiny he was under.

Settling down, Alex wandered to sit against a tree and stare at the doll he had in his hands.

It stared back, refusing to answer any of his unasked questions.

_Jack and Jill went up the hill, _Alex thought, tracing the smile of the doll with a wary finger- cautious in case it leaped to life and tore of his finger with sharp, pointy-

It had to mean something.

_Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of-_

The Begonia's.

The box.

_America._

_ Jack and Jill._

The Begonia's.

The box.

_America._

It was no use.

He was going round in circles _(ring-a-ring of roses, a pocket full of posies, a-tishoo! A-tishoo! We all fall-) _and circles and he couldn't-

_Jack._

His eyes glazed.

Who had given him the antidote?

Why did Snake and Sabina say that they had seen and talked to Jack when she was _dead?_

Why was everything going back to-

(_Jack and Jill went up the hill)_

-Jack?

Why?

_"Clean up your mess,"_

How was he meant to do that? How could he- how could he clean up a mess that he didn't even know _how _it had gotten there? How did he _do _that?

_You start with the things you _do _know._

The breath left his chest.

America.

He knew all about America.

He looked up to see Sabina watching him, eyes all too telling, all too-

He looked down again.

_Loose your sins, _something whispered. _And let them eat you alive._

_ It's the only way to clean up._

_ Tell the truth._

_ Be the truth._

But the truth _hurt._

_ Only for a while, _it insisted. _And then it will let you be in control._

In control? He tilted his head inquisitively to the side.

_In contol, _it agreed. _In control and away from the Birdcage and MI6._

The doll stared gauntly up at him, daring him to try and break away from the Birdcage and what it represented.

_But where do I _start? He moaned.

_Right from the beginning._

Right from the beginning.

Right from the beginning, Jack agreed.

_("I am the beginning and the end")_

"Can I start from the beginning?" the words were drops of liquid sapphire upon a sea of black.

Confused eyes turned onto him- except for Sabina, who looked quietly satisfied- approving.

"The beginning of what?" it didn't matter who the words belonged to. It didn't matter.

"The beginning of America. The Beggining and then End- the **B**irdcag**E**."

He was doing _exactly _what the Birdcage expected him _not _to do.

And that was to tell his story.

To sell his sins.

To allow this story to seep out into the outside world.

_Reality. _He dug his fingers into his palm; felt the sting. _This is reality._

He was gaining control by breaking anothers.

The doll _(Jack) _scowled up at him, promising him revenge.

"Let me start from the beginning,"

* * *

**AN- *looks at you nervously* Yeah...a cliffhanger. Uhm...well...yeah. And the plot thickens! (Somewhat) WHAT? WHO SAID THAT? *Silence then crickets chirp* That's what I thought.**

**CAN I JUST SAY THAT I HAVE THE BEST REVIEWERS EVER?**** Yes. I'm talking to you. Well, maybe not you, cos you don't review *shrugs* but you're still great- just not **_**as **_**great, yeah? So, I sit there after reading your lovely reviews and then think "WHAT CAN I DO TO SHOW MY UPMOST APPRECIATION?" and then I think "Write faster?" pause, and then "Nah." SO! Drumroll, please! I have decided...to do REVIEWER AWARDS!**

***readers glare at me, hissing and spitting at my feet* "We just wanted faster **_**chapters!" **_

**I'm TRYING! I SWEAR! But- but I thought maybe that would be **_**nice, **_**yeah? So, um, just review this chapter and I'll give you all a pretty award and title that you can write on your job refrence or something- help you become the next Prime Minister or President...yeah.**

**PS. I was asked by a wonderful Turtleinchains (interesting name, by the way!) how long this will be. Hm. Well, I **_**do **_**plan out my chapters, but sometimes things get moved around, I get new ideas or I scrap a chapter for another. Like this one. This wasn't actually planned- I had something else planned but I was feeling this, so...well, onto actually answering the question. I'm guessing it'll be about 28 chapters or **_**maybe **_**in the 30's. I mean, the chapters are long anyway, and sometimes I cover more than I think I would...but, yeah. I am thinking of a sequel after this, but we'll have to see. (:**

**Anyway! Review and gain a fantabulous award! Yaaaaaaayyy! (PPS. Thanks for reading!)**


	14. Chapter 14

**AN- * Bursts from room, mopping off sweat and dirt* I'm ALLLLIIIVVEE!**

* * *

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Shadows played that night.

They chased each other up and down the silent white halls.

Except they _weren't _silent.

_(But he wished they were)_

Huddled up against the hospital wall, Alex sat with his knees pressed up to his chest and his hands _clawing _into his hair, fingers pulling at the golden strands and eyes round and unseeing, brimming with terror of memories that swam in his head. Flecks of blood spotted his body and he breathed.

_In._

_ Out._

_ In._

_ Out._

Shuddering gasp-

-clench at the hair-

-_pause in breathing._

Tremble.

_In._

_ Out._

And there were voices beyond th door he was sat next to. Whispering, _murmuring _voices that sometimes rose in scarred pitch and bloodied volume before settling back again to that _hollow murmur._

And- and he was a _ghost _this shadowy night.

A bloody (and terrified) ghost.

And the- and the words they were saying...

_(in...out...) _He huddled further to the wall, fingers pulling and pulling, a soft howl leaving his frozen lips.

The words...

_ (make them stop)_

* * *

_x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x_

**APPROX. 9 days before 'The Incident'**

** 4:27 PM**

Bewildered, the Pleasures and Alex stared at the bunch of 30 Begonia flowers that had _once _again been left on their doorstep in an antique and gilded birdcage.

"Not again," Edward Pleasure muttered, picking the rattling birdcage up and squinting at it in the sunlight.

Alex gazed at it silently.

This was the third time that they had come home to find some flowers left there. The first time, there were only four flowers, tied with a black ribbon and placed in a small rusting gold birdcage, their heads drooping towards the door as if they were sleepy from having to wait for them. They had bemusedly picked the flowers up and placed them in their lounge, Mrs Pleasure joking that "someone had an admirer" as she propped the undoubtedly beautiful red flowers up in the room, teasing their heads so they looked a little more awake.

Then, the following three days afterwards, they had received 27 Begonia flowers, this time _trapped _in a birdcage, the lock done with a key. Smiles straining a little more now, they politely and subtly threw the flowers in the bin, Mrs Pleasure excusing herself to go and ask the neighbors over _just where the flowers were coming from. _And then, after stepping inside, Mr Pleasure had casually (not casually enough) asked Alex (with a light touch on his shoulder that he did his best not to flinch from. He didn't _want _them to send him back to the 'soothing' voices and too intense stares) just whether those flowers were a dark gift from his past life.

He had very calmly said _no, they are _not _a part of my life. _And then had turned and pretended not to hear Edward Pleasure calling him back.

But now, as they stood gazing at the flowers held dangling inside the birdcage, Alex had to wonder just whether that statement he had made really was true. Or whether it was just wishful thinking.

Pretending not to notice the tense glances that were being sent his way, Alex took to counting the flowers again, just to make sure he had counted right. He had.

31 Begonia's lay elegantly inside the cage.

His mind spun.

It _meant _something.

What did the number 31, mean? 31 sometimes meant perfection, or godliness. But then, what about the numbers 4 and 27? Surely they meant something, too? And what about the birdcage (old and worn; an antique, most likely, quite expensive. A collectors item? Someone wealthy must be giving the 'gifts')? The birdcage obviously seemed to denote to captivity or being trapped as the doors on the birdcages _always _trapped the flowers _inside. _A trapping of beauty? A trapping of something precious? Begonia's meant 'warning', didn't they? A trapped warning? No, no, that didn't sound-

"Alex!"

Snapping from his thoughts, he twitched his head up quickly, meeting the gaze of Edward Pleasure.

"Yes?" he asked, a little irritated at being broken from his thoughts. This was a _mystery, _right here! A mystery that needed to be-

"Don't think too much into it, Alex,"

Alex blinked.

_Don't think too much into it?_

But..._why?_

Didn't _everything _need to be thought into? This was- this could be _dangerous. _Why would they tell him not to think into it? Why would they? He opened his mouth to tell them as much, to tell their wary (always _suspicious) _eyes that that was _stupid._That taking things like this on _face value _would get them killed one day.

"Alex." Mr Pleasure warned.

The words hesitated in his mouth.

His mouth twisted in a painful grimace, eyes narrowing to thin hazelnut brown slits, chest rising and falling. "I was just going to-"

"No." Edward Pleasure held up a hand; stopping his words with a hard gaze as well as that uplifted hand. "'I' will not be doing _anything. _We talked about this, remember, Alex?"

_We talk about a _lot _of things, _he thought rebelliously, but kept the words locked away with a thinning of his lips.

The hand fell down sternly. "When there is a problem, what do you do?"

It was so _embarrassing. _Alex slid his eyes over to Liz and Sabina who were watching him quietly, and he had to force himself not to bare his teeth and growl at them to _stop looking! _His fingers dug into his palms, raising his chin impetuously and defiantly.

"Alex." a softly spoken order.

Alex _hated _orders.

"What do you do?"

His fingers trembled in his palm, nails dug deeper. "I leave it to someone else," he managed to choke out, dropping his head to avoid the kind smile that he knew Edward would be sending his way.

"Very good, Alex. Now, what I'm going to do is throw these flowers away, and then you're going to go upstairs and get ready, OK?"

He choked on a breath (a mingled sob and laugh). Spelling things out for him. Every single step of the way Edward _spelled things out for him. _Like he was a child. A dog. Some sort of creature that never fully understood or needed that constant _telling of what to do._

"Come on, Alex! Let's go," Sabina's chirping voice cut through his thoughts, and a hand latched onto his forearm, pulling him through the open door and up the stairs with a constant flow of lime green chatter and noise.

Tugged into his room, Alex watched as the door closed and Sabina turned to face him.

Steadily, he blinked at her.

She tried for a small smile, her hands reaching out to rub at the soft side of her face, eyelashes lowering as she peered somewhere off into the corner of the room. "He doesn't mean it like that, Alex." her voice was soft as she spoke, as if she was afraid of offending Alex with the volume of her words. "He's just worried about you and sometimes doesn't quite know how to say it. That's all."

"I know that," he replied calmly, turning his head to peer at his wallpaper that was (the _wrong colour) _bare of any type of photograph or poster.

He couldn't bare to have any photographs up.

Photographs were reminders from _time gone by._

And his psychiatrist always said that you should _let the past stay the past._

His lip curled in derision.

That was all very well and good for _her _to say, wasn't it?

His past fed his future, though- didn't it? His past had latched onto him in every waking moment and dragged across the floor with every chained step that he took, a shredded cloak that howled and screamed of things that he _wished _he could forget, that- that even when he put his hands over his ears _real tight _and _real hard _they still swam and clawed at his ears with broken screeches of _one moment too late _or _one mistake too many._

Shakily, he inhaled. "I'm not going."

Sabina frowned at him when he made his way to the door. "What do you mean?"

He turned his eyes on her and watched as she stilled under his gaze. "I mean, I'm not going to the psychiatrist,"

Floundering, she reached out a hand only to have it hanging there when he directed his eyes from her face and onto her smooth hand. "Alex, you can't _not go,"_

_ I can do whatever I want. _"Why not? Because I'm mentally ill? Is that it?"

Sabina's eyes darkened and she stepped in front of the door that he was trying to exit from. "Oh don't be so ridiculous," she spat, eyes narrowing in anger. "Do you really think that's the reason you go there? You go there because you saw _horrible things. _No one gets away from seeing horrible things unscathed and if you think you're some exception then-"

"Sabina. Move from the-"

"We _care _about you, Alex! We love you! I love you and it _hurts _when you keep pushing us away like this!" she paused, met Alex's eye and then winced.

It sounded like a line from a bad soap opera and they both knew it.

Shoulders sagging, Sabina finally moved from the door, though her voice had become soft and wounded, hurt. "I don't know what you feel like, Alex. But _please, _just bear with it. It's- it's difficult for all of us, not just you. We have to adjust too so _yes _we make mistakes, but- but it'll be worth it in the end, Al. I'm sure."

_It'll be worth it in the end. _

His eyes fogged.

Would it?

Would it be worth it?

He'd- he'd lost _so much _in just _months. _Could he- could he really let himself fall blindly into the arms of another family. Could he have _(mummy, daddy, Ian, Ash, Jack) _another chance? Was he _allowed _another chance? Because he- he-

"Don't be selfish, Alex," Sabina whispered.

His eyes burnt.

He didn't want to get hurt again.

_ (Please don't hurt me. Please don't love me. Please don't leave me)_

He didn't want to be _hurt._

He didn't want to feel that searing, screeching, scratching emotional pain that came with being _left. _With being _abandoned. _With being the _only one left._

He scrabbled to suck in a clear breath as he got tangled within the barbed breaths of _times gone by (the past remains the past), _biting at his tongue to stop from crying out.

He didn't want to be _the only one left._

But...wasn't that what he was making himself to be, now? He was putting a wall in between everyone (it's for _safety!_) and shutting himself off even when they'd offered him a fresh start- a new leaf.

Should he take it?

Should he- should he allow himself to freefall?

_(Don't __**do **__it, you fool! Don't __**do **__it!)_

"Fine." against his better judgment, he turned and faced Sabina, saw her blue eyes widen and fill with happiness; saw her pink lips pull and raise into a smile and _hoped- _hoped to _all that was good and fine and pure (and nothing like him) _that it was worth it. That it was worth bringing down his tentative guard and stepping into something that frightened him so much.

Freefalling.

* * *

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

**APPROX. 8 days before 'The Incident'**

**TIME- 12:21**

"So, Alex, tell me. How was your day today?" leather creaked and a leg folded precisely over the other, chin propped up on one forefinger and dark eyes peering thoughtfully back at him- as if every moment was so utterly coordinated that it had been meticulously rehearsed in front of a mirror.

Alex's fingers dug into the side of his expensive dark leather chair, and he glowered darkly past the woman- Miss Ahmadi.

A delicate and pretty sigh, a subtle rolling of eyes as the leather creaked once again. "Alex, how was your-"

"Absolutely brilliant," he finally shot out, his eyes lowering like thunderclouds. "Edward grounded me, and now I'm sat in this office again and you keep asking me about my day." scowling, he tossed his cold gaze onto her.

Miss Ahmadi pursed her fragile looking lips, one honey brown finger still holding her porcelain head up. She hummed something and then reached out for that _stupid _pad and clicky pen; no doubt to write some falsehood about his mental state in there. _Alex is showing signs of extreme irritation to these sessions... "_You were grounded?" Alex closed his eyes as she very obviously ignored the rest of his before statement. "Care to tell me why?"

Realising the session would go quicker if he played along, he swallowed down a biting comment and forced himself to speak. "Apparently, I was acting rudely and disrespectfully."

(Though maybe he was)

He met Miss Ahmadi's eye.

She arched a relatively friendly eyebrow at him. "And, _were you _being rude-" her hand began writing again. "-and disrespectful?"

"No, I was _not _being rude and disrespectful." he retorted, leaning into his chair and remembering a time when he had sat in front of _someone else _who sat in a chair like this, fingers steepled, eyes assessing and mouth always saying things he _never wanted to-_

"What did you do to become...grounded?" she spoke the word distastefully, as if the mere sound of the word offended her.

Alex clenched his jaw at the memory. "We've been getting flowers," he admitted quietly, and tried to ignore the furious movement of her wrist as she realised that for once, Alex was going to work with her in these sessions. "Red Begonia flowers. He told me not to think too much into it. To leave it to him. And- and well, it wasn't- all I did was locate the place where the flowers were _coming _from! That's _all! _I only went to go and see where they were being delivered from and where the birdcages came from and what their worth was. But somehow, he _found out-" _his eyes narrowed and his lip pulled up in harsh scorn. "Surprise, surprise. And then he decided to ground me for '_going against his orders_',"

"And you believe that to be an unfair course of action."

Alex shot her an incredulous look which she did not return of any kind, just waiting patiently for him to continue. "Of _course _I do!" he dropped a hand onto his armrest and anxiously began tapping his fingers on it. "He can't _ground _me! He doesn't _own_ my movements! All I was trying to do was _help! _If these flowers are dangerous, then I want to _help _them," his voice cracked and he hastily covered it over. "They're my- they're my fa-f- I need to protect them!"

"Family?" she amended his clumsy falling over the word, her wrist moving up and down as she wrote.

_Family?_

"Yeah." he admitted softly- like a falling rose petal.

"I understand, Alex,"

"Of course you do." he muttered. "It's what you're _paid _to do."

Ignoring him, she carried on, spinning the pen in and out of between her fingers- Alex found the movement oddly mesmerising. "You're used to having to protect things, isn't that right?"

"Yes," he murmured, rivetted on the flash of the silver pen in the lights.

"Therefore it seemed only natural to you that you should attempt to aide your newfound family in anyway possible." she paused, but the pen kept flicking. "You and Edward are bound to clash on matters like this, Alex. He's a _father, _it's _his _natural instinct to want to protect you and everyone else. But by you attempting to be the protector, you're taking on his role, and thus making it difficult for him to look after you."

"I don't need looking after," he muttered, tearing his eyes away from the shining pen.

Her dark eyes gazed solemnly at him. "Everyone needs protecting, Alex," she said quietly. "Even the strongest of us."  
He didn't reply to that.

"So try not to blame him, he's only looking out for you- you both need time to adjust."

Half-heartedly, Alex grunted, flopping his head back onto the headrest of the seat and peering dully up into the ceiling. "That's what Sabina said," he said tiredly, shutting his eyes.

"Hm. Your sister knows what she's talking about."

Sister.

He shivered.

_Attachments. _

He didn't _want _any attachments.

But how on _earth _did he tell anyone that?

"Now, time for some word games."

_Tell them what they want to hear._

* * *

X-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

** APPROX. 7 days before 'The Incident'**

** TIME: 21:56 PM**

Alex pressed his ear to the door, listening as they spoke, breathing softly and near inaudibly, his hands pressed into the side of the wall.

"They were _in _the house, this time, Edward! We're going to have to phone the police over it."

"How did they get _in _the house?" the bewildered voice belonged to Edward Pleasure.

"I don't know," a creaking of floorboards, pacing. "Perhaps they somehow managed to unlock the door...the glass wasn't broken, it didn't _look _like anyone had taken or destroyed anything. It just looked like they wanted to leave the flowers."

"How many were there this time?" the voices had lowered.

"26." a short trembling gasp. "Edward, I'm _scared. _I don't know what they mean and I'm sure it's Alex's past-"

"We don't know that, Liz."

"Oh _come on, _Edward! What else can it be?"

A sharp _shh! _A muffled _"keep your voice down"._

Alex leaned closer into the door, his heart thudding.

"Alex is the _only reason _you damaged your leg, the _only reason _that we're getting these flowers!"

"Liz, _we don't know that."  
_

"Don't be stupid, Edward,"

Voice rising. "I _am not _being stupid! It's ridiculous that you would even-"

"Dad! Mum! Stop it!" Sabina's hissing voice, angry. "Don't talk about Alex like that!"

"Sabina, you've got school in the morning, you should-"

"_Don't _try and send me to bed like a good little girl! I have a right to listen in! This is my house too!" more creaking of floorboards.

Alex closed his eyes, listening, listening, listening.

"What we're going to do is- listen, Sabina and don't roll your eyes like that- what we're going to do is _not tell Alex." _

"Dad! You can't just-"

"No, Sabina. We're _not telling Alex. _He'll worry and then try and do something and most likely get hurt."

"But still, you can't just-" upset.

"Sabina. _Please."_

Quiet.

"Thank you. I'll phone the police now, and no matter what happens, do not blame Alex. The problem will get sorted out and I'm sure it'll just end up being some sort of stupid prank. Alex doesn't need more stress or worry in his life so _we'll _sort it out, yeah? It'll get sorted out if Alex isn't involved, deal?"

A pause and then soft murmurs of _"deal". _

"Good. Now, Sabina, go and check on your brother. He has the odd knack of listening in-"

Swiftly, Alex pulled away and padded in a silver movement up the stairs, slipping into his room and quickly under his covers, pulling out a pad and a pen and scratching down the number _27 _onto the slightly dogged paper before stowing it under his mattress again.

They said that they didn't need his help.

They said that they were protecting him by keeping him in the dark.

But they _weren't._

They were making it more difficult for _all of them. _

_ (Swallow your hurt)_

He closed his eyes and softened his breaths as there came a gentle knock on his door, and a soft call of "Alex?"

He was in this problem (whatever it was) too.

So, yes. He _would _help out.

And they couldn't stop him.

* * *

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

**APPROX. 6 days before 'The Incident'**

** TIME: 14:04**

"You OK, Al?"

Alex turned to look at Sabina, narrowing his eyes under the glare of the sun until his eyes were just honey brown slits peering at Sabina who gazed back.

"I'm OK," he said quietly, shifting on the sand and running his hands through the grains.

She squinted at him, one sandy hand shading her blue eyes as they peered doubtfully back at him, her dark hair spilling over her creamy skin as she leaned in to get a better look at him. "We can go back soon, if you want, Al," she said softly under her breath, the sounds of her friends laughing and screaming as they dived in and out of the waves loud in the background.

He shook his head, trying to quench the irritation down into the pit of his stomach where it could nestle and hiss silently in the confines of his belly. He'd been feeling a lot more irritable lately and he didn't know-

-No.

That was a lie.

He did know why.

He was _restless. _

His hands clenched in the sand. There he was, sat on a beach in San Fransico with Sabina and her friends playing in the crystal waves, their youthful laughter raising and darting through the warm air and Sabina sat laughing and telling stories to Alex, her hair wet from the seawater and dripping down her shoulders and back.

It wasn't _right._

What was he _doing?_

Digging his fingers further into the sand, he clenched his jaw and sought to remove such thoughts of _why he was just sat there _and concentrate on something else. His psychologist had mentioned that having such thoughts were not helpful for him, and that he should let go of the past and fix his mind upon what was happening here and now, and not feel guilty about it.

But sometimes, Alex just generally _couldn't help it. _He didn't _like _feeling like sitting in the sun or kicking a football around was wrong. He didn't _like _feeling like every day he should be suffering, every day he should be cold and hard. But it was _just there; _whispering angrily every time he found his lips wanting to quirk up into a smile, the cold fingers gripping into his shoulders, dead, large eyes gazing at him and snarling in a raspy hiss of _why wasn't he suffering?_

So the smile would fall like a wrinkled autumn leaf, and his eyes would dull like old marbles.

"I think we should go home," Sabina murmured to him, taking in his fogged eyes worriedly, chewing at the inside of her mouth as her eyes flickered over his like twin blue stars.

"I just told you," he said, voice low, not wanting to be heard by Sabina's friends who were now jogging over, seawater dripping from their bodies as they grinned at them. His hand twitched into a small wave as one of the girls caught his eye and waved enthusiastically back. "I'm _fine."_

She didn't look convinced, but had no chance to argue otherwise as her friends dropped messily into the sand next to her, smiling with those bright teeth and eyes and shoving and chattering.

"The water's great, Al!" he turned at the sound of the voice and looked at Georgina who spoke to him, as she nudged him. "_Sure _you don't want to go for a swim?"

"I'm sure, thanks," he said, smiling smoothly at her, his hand subconsciously moving towards his t-shirt to clutch at the material that hid all of his secrets.

Luckily, Sabina broke in quickly before they could try and pester him more, jumping up and glaring at Alex in mock severity, one finger pointed dramatically at him; the other hand resting lightly against her hip. "We're going home, I, for one am _tired."_

"_Tired?" _a stunning dark skinned girl, Phoebe, shot out incredulously. "All you've been doing is sitting on the sand and talking to Alex for the whole three hours we've been here!"

Sabina poked her nose up into the air, making her voice seem nasal and snooty. "Sitting in the sun too long is tiring and bad for my pearly complexion."

"The skin tone of a corpse," Lucy muttered.

Sabina shot the girl a glare. "_Excuse _me?"

Innocent eyes peered up at her. "Sorry?"

Grinning, Sabina pretended to kick sand at the girl who rolled and curled up into a ball on the ground, moaning dramatically to spare her.

Straightening up and becoming serious again, Sabina slung a slim arm around Alex and leaned into him, Alex gazing down at her. "_If _you don't mind, I have to take my gorgeous friend home," winking at them and mouthing "eat your hearts out", she tugged the golden haired youth away.

"I told you that I was fine," Alex muttered as soon as they were out of ear shot, Sabina still with her arm around his (too tense) middle.

Sabina pulled a face, frowning at him in irritation. "_Please," s_he scoffed, finally letting go of him and skipping to the side to scoop up a shell. Examining it as they walked, the tips of her fingers caressing the grooves within the seashell, she glanced up at him again. "You _always _say that you're fine. Whether or not you mean it is a whole other matter,"

Clenching his jaw and deciding to say nothing for the time being, he allowed her to shove the shell into his hands and stop him, forcing him with eager eyes to look at the colour and shape of the shell- only moving again when Sabina deemed him educated enough in the topic of shells.

"I think Phoebe and Melissa like you," she said suddenly, just as they were stepping off of the beach and onto the pavement to walk back home, Sabina barefooted and holding her flip-flops in one sandy hand.

Raising an eyebrow at her, Alex struggled to find what to say to that. He finally settled on a less than clever "oh".

Rolling her eyes and nudging him with an affectionate shoulder, she curled her hand into his as she noticed his eyes wandering again. "Stop doing that," she ordered, forcing his attention to her.

Alex tried to tug his fingers out of her hand, but she wasn't having any of it. "Stop what?"

He lowered his eyes as she gave him The Look. "You're wandering again, Alex. Happy place, yeah?"

How he _hated _that sentence.

'Happy place'?

He was _in _a happy place. He was in _San Fransico, _a life of spying far behind him, a kind and beautiful new sister stepping by his side and a new family (his heart did _not _clench up at the word) by his side. But- but his _head _wasn't in a happy place. He knew that, she knew that- _they _knew that. But there was _nothing he could do about it. _He _did _try to focus on things that made him happy; but they were just _so hard to find _now. The small pointless things that used to make him smile were just that now- small, pointless- a mere drop in the ocean compared to the roaring and screaming masses of bad memories that tore at his head. So it was all well and good repeating 'Happy place' just like his psychologist had (not very discreetly. Had she forgotten that he as an ex-_spy?_) murmured to the Pleasures to say when he looked distant and sad.

_Happy place._

_(You don't deserve a 'happy place') _

"I'm happy," he forced a smile, and was pleased to see that, for the time being, Sabina bought it, and released his hand with a satisfied expression on her face.

"So, yeah. Melissa and Phoebe,"

"Sab," he said tiredly, rubbing at his face with a hand. "I hardly even _know _them."

"You mean, you _won't _get to know them." She shot back smartly.

Alex peered down at her, frowning. "No." he said slowly, his eyes narrowing. "I mean I _hardly even know them,"_

"You know that you have to interact socially, Alex. It'll help you get-"

"I _am better," _he snapped back, angry now, lips twisted into an ugly snarl. "Why do you keep _telling me _that I'm _not well?"_

Sabina scowled at him, stopping suddenly and clasping his face in both hands, burning eyes gazing into his own. "Because you're _not, _Alex. No one gets over things like _that _in just a few weeks,"

Ripping his face from her hands, he gave her a midnight glower, taking a step back and away from her. "I _have." _He insisted, his hands twisting by his sides. Noticing them, he forced them into stillness. Ever since- ever since _then, _he had never known quite what to do with his hands. They were awkward on him. Not fit for writing, drawing, spooning food into his mouth- anything. They moved limply and uncertainly when he walked or when he was still, as if they were always pining for a chance to _do something _that he himself _didn't want to do._

_(Kill, hurt, save)_

Shoving them into his pockets so Sabina wouldn't notice, he kept walking, slipping past an old couple who shuffled past him, his penetrating eyes running over them in a matter of seconds, pulling them apart, their history, their job occupation, their-

"Will you _stop doing that?" _Sabina hissed, hitting him with an elbow and making him wince. "Stop looking at everyone as if they're all threats!"

_You don't know that. They could be. Maybe- maybe they _are _all threats in disguise. Yeah. Yeah. They're _all _threats you just don't know it and you won't accept it because you don't know it and if you don't know it then-_

Breathing a little laboured, Alex pressed a hand over his head, steadying himself as a sudden wave of dizziness hit him.

"Oh, gosh," Sabina said, flicking from annoyed to worried in a second. She came closer to him, anxious eyes taking in his pale face. "I _knew _you weren't OK," cursing, she grabbed at his forearm in warm and soft hands. "Alex? Alex? Did you take your medication?"

"I don't _need it," _he groaned, trying to pull away from her and her fluttering butterfly hands that _always _knew what they wanted to do.

"You're such an _idiot _sometimes, Alex," she hissed, all motherly sharpness and concerned eyes. "Come on. Take it steady, yeah? You know what Miss Ahmadi said? Breathe slowly and in through your nose and out through your mouth,"

"Sabina, don't _fuss, _I'm-"

"If you _dare _to say that you're fine again," she snapped angrily, tugging on his arm. "Then I'll hurt you."

His arm tensed under her grip.

Glancing at his suddenly wary expression, Sabina's eyes softened. "Sorry, Alex. You know I didn't mean it like that,"

Uncomfortably, he looked away, forcing his muscles to relax as she led him home.

"We're home, dad!" the dark haired teenager yelled as she unlocked the door and swung it open with once foot.

Alex frowned as no one answered.

Sabina stood still, too before exchanging a look with Alex and trying again. "We're-"

Liz Pleasure came rushing out of the sitting room, looking flustered as she pressed one finger against her mouth, her eyes flickering over to Alex and filling with something akin to suspicion and worry.

Alex was immediately on guard.

"Mom?" Sabina asked quietly, still in the stage where she switched in and out of American and British titles.

When she reached them, Liz Pleasure pulled her hand away from her lips, eyes still full of that questionable look. "Your dad's talking to some people at the moment, Sab and Alex. Would you mind going out to-"

Forcefully, Alex moved forward.

"_Alex!_" Liz Pleasure reached out to snatch at his arm, but he dodged away, moving quickly to avoid the woman that he knew would be hurrying after him.

Quickly, reaching out, he pushed the doors to the living room open and stared at the sight that met his eyes.

Edward Pleasure was sat in the middle of the room on a sofa, talking to three men who sat perched on another sofa, their faces hard as they listened.

But that wasn't what had surprised him.

It was the fact that Edward Pleasure was holding a bloody cloth to his head.

And the men were clearly CIA agents.

All four occupants in the room turned as the door swung open.

Alex gazed at them. And then:

"What happened to you?" his finger raised _("it's rude to point") _to point at Edward Pleasure, already moving forward and further into the room.

"Alex-" Edward made to stagger up, but the men raised a hand and gestured him down.

Alex switched his burning attention off of Edward _(someone had hurt him!) _and onto the three men. "And who are you meant to be?" he asked sharply, unconsciously slipping into a defensive position as he moved gracefully forward, his hands by his side ready to hurt to seek to destroy to find to help to-

"Alex! I told you that you can't-" Liz Pleasure's voice stopped abruptly, but Alex ignored her, focussing instead on the three men stood in their living room.

"Alex," Mr Pleasure's voice was heavy and tight with anger. "When someone tells you to-"

"I asked you a question," Alex growled, stepping forward again.

_"Alex Johnathan Rider! _I am _speaking _to you!"

He twitched his head in Edward's direction, and for one horrible moment, was glad to see him flinch and buckle underneath his cold and dead gaze. Was glad to see him stumble on that crooked and painful leg of his; shift nervously back like that, hurt and anxiety playing across his face in bruise like blues. Happy to see him-

"What?" he asked.

The moment was gone quickly. Alex was left feeling ill and guilty, and Edward Pleasure straightened up and glared furiously at the teenager. "I want you to leave. Right now."

Alex gazed at him.

To obey, or to not obey?

Tipping his head gently to the side, he took in Edward's face.

It looked slightly sickly and held an ill pallor to it- the hand pressing that bloody bit of cloth to his head was shaking ever so slightly in pain and weakness.

"Who did that to you?" he said.

The temperature in the room plummeted dramatically.

"Alex Rider,"

Alex turned to the new voice.

One of the men took a step forward and nodded blandly, his colleagues reciprocating the movement behind him. "We're here to rid the threat that's been delivering flowers to your..." he eyed Alex critically, and then swept his eyes around the room. "...place of lodging."

It did not go missed on Alex that he didn't say "home".

"One minute," scowling, Edward Pleasure moved forward, leaning a little heavier on his cane than usual. "I thought we agreed to _keep Alex out of it?"_

Three pairs of eyes swung onto him. "Yes, we did. But the only way to keep Mr Rider out of it is to explain to him what's going on."

Mr Pleasure pursed his lips and then turned to look at Alex.

Very clearly, Alex showed the message through his eyes that he would _not back down._

The ragged determination that he had built up fell from around his shoulders, and the blond haired teen watched as he visibly sagged. "Fine," he muttered in a voice that was very obviously displeased. "But I'm staying," he added stubbornly, moving to the sofa and flopping wearily down into it, gratefully accepting the roll of bandages that Liz Pleasure handed him with worry showing plainly on her face.

"Of course you are," Number 2 drawled, gesturing with a movement of his chin to sit down.

Stiffly, only after the other men had, Alex sat down next to Mr Pleasure, ignoring the way his eyes bored into the side of his head. Then, Number 3 began speaking, his voice uncomfortably relaxing in it's deep and chocolaty pitch and tone.

"This morning, Mr Pleasure phoned up the local police station, asking about the flowers that were being delivered. When they received the name of the callers, the police forwarded the call straight to the CIA," his dark eyes latched onto Alex's cool brown ones. Alex didn't bother with the whole 'how did you know that I knew that you were CIA?' spiel. The men _knew- _as much as he was loathe to admit it- that he was a spy through and through. They must have seen it in the way he moved, the way he held himself, spoke, looked at them- anything. But they knew that he knew their secrets just as much as they knew his.

Which was unsettling but oddly liberating at the same time.

It was...natural.

It was _settling _and _unsettling _all at once.

(Hadn't just a few hours ago he been wanting something _'exciting' _to happen?)

"After the call had been made, at around 10:45 AM, Mr Pleasure left the premises and was then-"

"You don't need to tell him that." Edward snapped, glaring at the men and tapping his cane into the carpet. "He doesn't need to know about-"

"You were attacked," Alex broke in quietly, silencing him. Pretending not to notice the way their eyes had moved onto him, he continued, eyes latched somewhere off into the distance. "You were most likely told something cryptic before you were attacked. It was only quick and not completely violent- lacking the savagery of an attack with true motive to harm. Before you were knocked unconscious, the person perhaps told you something once again." finally, Alex allowed his eyes to wander onto the shocked face of Mr Pleasure. "Something about me."  
A short silence filled the pause, and then Number 2 broke it with a low whistle.

"Not bad, kid," he murmured, looking at Alex as he turned to face him with a new sort of approval in his eyes. "How old did you say you were, again?"

"I didn't," he said tersely, his eyebrow arching in a faux expression of surprise. "Surely you would remember something like _that, _Mr CIA Agent?"

"Back on track, yes, you were right," Number 3 nodded shortly and tapped his fingers against his knee, Number 2 snorting in bemusement at Alex's comment.

"When he came to, we'd found him and we proceeded to your place of lodging."

"What do you know, then?" Alex asked carefully, trying to hide the anticipation down from his voice.

They must of caught some of the tone though, because their eyes sparkled knowingly.

Alex swallowed.

They knew.

They were like _him._

Addicts of mystery and danger.

"The flowers are perceived to be from a not-too-long-ago disbanded group named **B**irdcage**E**." his eyes scanned the teens sharply, but Alex forced his face to remain neutral and wooden under the close inspection.

Biting down on his tongue, he forced his expression to remain _neutral, neutral, neutral._

Finally, the scrutiny ended, and the man nodded once, his eyes dropping their sharpness and instead retaining their focus on the conversation at hand. "We were told that you would know something of this group,"

Alex almost choked on his breath.

Immediately, the sharp eyes were back.

"**B**irdcage**E**?" he laughed shortly, but it sounded strangled and odd so he quickly abandoned it to die alone in the room. His hands awkwardly clasped over each other, his fingers thrumming pointlessly against the side of his hands. "I heard-" he breathed in raspily, feet tapping against the end of the sofa. "-r-rumours. Yes- I heard-" he stood up sharply and suddenly, eyes glazed as he moved away from them. Needing to move, needing to pace, needing to- to- _do. _"Hasn't everyone heard of them?" Oh _Lord, _his voice was rising in pitch, going higher, thinner, close to snapping and breaking and shredding and- "The **B**irdcage**E**, yes. I'm-I'm sure _everyone's _heard of-" he stopped by the wall and wondered how he had gotten there. Pausing, one hand pressed against the hard surface, he sucked in a juddering breath, refusing to turn round and face their gazes that would be full of _questions _that he _didn't know how to answer _or _didn't know _what _to answer. _"Yes, I've heard of them."

Alex's ears twitched at the sound of a hand sliding over leather. "It sounds to me," Number 1 paused heavily, and Alex could feel his curious gaze on his back."That you know more than anyone who had just _heard _of them would've done. You seem to be a little more acquainted with them."

"My Uncle took their organization down," he said stiffly, tautly, still facing the wall. "I might've accidentally seen some of the things that they had done to him."  
Another heavy pause and Alex turned around, leaning against the wall and watching them watch him warily.

"Something's not quite adding up, see," Number 1 finally said, gazing calmly at Alex though his eyes burnt with things left unsaid. "You said that you heard of them, and then you said that you accidentally saw of the things that they had done to your Uncle. But, you see, this group was destroyed 6 years ago and you would've been...what? 9? Anyway, for it to have had such a lasting effect on you, those must have been some _horrendous _things that you saw,"

"I don't forget things easily- it's part of the job," he snapped, trying to ignore the worry and fear that began to swim up through his stomach.

"Yes, I recognise that. But, Alex, you have to agree that your story simply _doesn't make sense. _You would've been 9 when your Uncle sustained his injuries, and you had no idea of him being a spy, so how would you have known that-"

"This has no relevance to what you're trying to find out." his fingers gripped around each other and tugged viciously. "So stop it. Stop trying to find leverage on me and just _tell me what you've found,"_

The three men examined him silently for a while before they settled, and the hidden threat left the air, allowing Alex to (only slightly) relax. Though he didn't stray from the wall.

"Right. OK, then. Mr Pleasure was attacked, yes, and was told-"

"I can speak, you know," the man grumbled, looking very much like a fish out of water amongst all of the shadowy words, hidden threats and lightly curbed secrets. He twisted his head around to peer hesitantly at Alex. "Before I was attacked, the man spouted out some rubbish about you-" he paused and dabbed quickly at his lips with a tongue, rushing the next words. "-never being safe and then he attacked me," he winced at that part, but bravely carried on nonetheless. "Then, when I was on the floor, he told me that danger was heading our way and then started reciting some sort of nursery rhyme, _'Ladybird, Ladybird'_, I think," his face scrunched up in distaste. "But he looked crazed and not all there, so I wouldn't listen to him, Alex,"

'_Ladybird, Ladybird'? _His mind spun as he tried to remember the nursery rhyme.

"It's the one about the house burning down when the ladybird flies away, and all of her children have died except for one who hides under a warming pan," Number 3 broke into his attempts at trying to remember the old poem.

"And why did he tell Edward that?" Alex asked, not quite expecting an answer, but not quite givign up hope for one either.

"We believe they're luring you, Alex."

Fighting not to roll his eyes, he nodded impatiently. "Yes, but what about the _poem? _What about the _flowers?_Why are they after me? Revenge for my Uncle taking down their operation?"

"The poem speaks of a ladybird. For the time being, we're going to say that the ladybird is you," Number 2 gestured to him. "And the 'children' would be the Pleasure's. Now, when the 'ladybird', or _you _go out, then all the children- or the Pleasure's-"

"Get killed." he interrupted blankly.

They shot him a quick and indecipherable look. "All accept one," Number 2 continued quietly, never moving his eyes from off of Alex who stood still and cold.

"So," Alex dragged in a cold cold breath and shuddered it out, feeling the sudden need to sit down or walk away. "These people are threatening to kill my- kill my- kill the Pleasure's," he thumped the back of his head into the wall as he closed his eyes. "Wonderful,"

"Alternatively, the poem could be interpreted as the meaning usually entails; a superstitious belief that ladybirds are bad luck, and that by chanting the rhyme, the ladybird will fly away. Or, to the meaning of the 'fire', that it was a commonly used practice to smoke insects out and away, killing their young who were unable to fly," he paused again and looked at Alex sombrely. "It could be analysed that perhaps they're taunting you, again, the ladybird, as being bad luck and they want to you to leave before anyone gets hurt,"

Fighting to remain calm, Alex nodded slowly, mulling over the painful words. "And what do you think it means?"

They shrugged after looking at each other. "We've been told not to think anything. Both of the meanings seem fully valid so it would be wise to see the poem as meaning both of the interpretations and more,"

"Right," he murmured. And then, having nothing else to say, he murmured it again. "Right."

"As for the flowers, they're still a mystery to us, and why they're after you? It seems like revenge is the most likely option. Unless you can think of anything else,"

Alex ignored the slight at his honesty, too busy thinking about ladybirds whose homes had been burned down and whose family was all dead. Or ladybirds who were bad luck and so were asked to leave before they got anyone hurt.

_Ladybird, ladybird._

"You think I should leave?" he asked.

"Alex!" Mr Pleasure said, horrified.

"Do you _think I should leave?" _he pressed, his hands pressing into the wall as he pushed himself away from it.

"Of course you shouldn't!" Edward ranted, his brows drawn down and his lips twisted into a frown, one hand gripping at the armrest on the chair brutishly. "Your home is _here, _Alex. Why would you feel the need to leave that just because of this?"

"They could be threatening to kill you," Alex said, and hated the way the words came out so calmly, like he didn't feel anything over the fact.

But he _did _feel things.

And the feelings were scary.

"If you leave, they could die. Remember the first interpretation," Number 2 pointed out.

Then what did they want him to _do? _Anxiously, he fiddled with his fingers; just wishing he knew what to _do _with them. One moment they were telling him that if he _left, _they would die, and the other they were telling him that if he _stayed _they would die! Were they _playing _with him? Was that it? Were they trying to mess him- mess him around- spin him up and down and around and then let him go? What did they _want _from him?

_Think, Alex! Think! _Furiously, he thought over everything that had happened and been said so far.

It seemed likely that they were taunting him and- yes- most likely trying to lure him towards them. Towards a- towards a trap? A trap? But they were threatening his new family...they wanted something from him? Did they- did they want something from him and thought that he knew what it was?

_What the hell did they _want?

"...for the time being we will be placing your house under surveillance," Alex snapped towards them at that and glared at them. "You won't even notice we're there, Alex."

"Really?" he asked scathingly.

Number 3 examined him with a quick sweep of his eyes and then smiled ruefully. "Well, maybe now and then. But it's for your safety, Alex."

_My safety? Why not my family's safety? _Nervous thoughts began to rise up within him. _Were they planning on using him?_

_ Don't be stupid, Alex. You're being too paranoid._

Jumping at the sudden voice in his mind, he shook his head at Edward Pleasure who noticed, turning his attention back to the three men.

"If anything happens, come straight to us- OK? This isn't a baby threat. You knowhow dangerous this **B**irdcag**E **group is. _Don't _try and take them head on. There's no time to play hero this time, Alex, it's too dangerous a game to just throw yourself into it."

Nodding impatiently to their hard stares, he frowned. "I know that," seeing their incredulous expressions, his frown darkened, and he slowed his voice, speaking a little more persuasively. "I _know _that,"

Lips pursed, Number 3 ran eyes over Alex's bordering on irritated face, noting the downward pull of his pink lips, the lowered gold eyebrows and darkened brown eyes. "Very well," slowly, almost reluctantly, the three men stood, pushing their shoulders back and out and straightening out. "Then, that will be all. We will be in contact with you shortly,"

Alex didn't like the way his eyes lingered on him after they glanced at Mr Pleasure.

Tightening his jaw, he stood straighter.

He was _done _with that lifestyle.

Their eyes didn't seem to agree.

"I'll let you out," Liz said quickly, flashing them a quick but uneasy smile, glancing at Alex with slightly shadowed _(she needs practice in hiding things) _eyes. "Please follow me,"

"We'll see you soon, Alex. Mr Pleasure. Remember to stay out of this," jerking their heads in stiff nods to both of them, they turned and followed Mrs Pleasure who showed them the way to the door.

Only when the door clicked shut did Mr Pleasure let out a huge billow of air, sinking further into the sofa.

Alex turned to rest curious eyes on him as the man placed a weary hand over his eyes and let out a small moan.

"I thought we were done with this," the man muttered, his fingers moving to pinch the bridge of his nose, the bloody cloth finally leaving his forehead, revealing a nasty looking wound.

Quietly, Alex moved forward, intent on getting a closer look at the wound. "Don't you need to go to the hospital for that?" he pointed out in a low voice, hands twitching by his sides; wondering whether this was an opportunity to use them.

"Dad! Are you OK!" Sabina finally flew into the room and hovered by her fathers side, butterfly hands reaching out to grasp at her fathers, Mrs Pleasure coming in too, wringing her hands and then placing them on his shoulders.

"I'm fine," wanly he smiled up at them all, squeezing Sabina's hand and placing a warm hand atop of Liz'.

And Alex- Alex stood (uselessly) by the side. His hands hanging (unhelpfully) by his sides.

(useless)

Quickly, he dug them into his pockets again.

Because, really; Mr Pleasure only had _two _hands.

One for his wife.

The other for his daughter.

_(then where's the one for me?)_

So once again, he was the odd piece.

The tag-a-long.

The jigsaw piece that was placed in the wrong puzzle box.

The wrong shape, the wrong piece, the wrong-

-everything.

Everything was _wrong._

"Alex?"

And he _knew _he should hear them, but at that moment it was so _hard _to. The CIA had just come back into his pretty little 'Happily Ever After' life. They had just slipped in like dirty oil and were pressing their filthy handprints onto everything that they had spray-painted gold and furnished in silver. They were tearing down his illusion of peace and tranquility and warmth and _safety _(which never really existed), and splattering _black _all over it. _Black _and _white _and all of those other _too real _colours which _shouldn't _exist in reality, shouldn't _exist _in his perfect world but now they did. Again.

But it wasn't just the CIA threatening his pretty perfect life, it was this- this _**B**__irdcage__**E **_group. They thought they could just waltz in, waltz in with their too perfect steps that were like those of a spider and sneak in and snatch everything precious and diamond out from underneath his feet and send him toppling _down down down _again.

But they couldn't _do _that.

It was _his _job to protect his new found family.

His job and he would _damn well do it well._

They had _hurt Edward _and that meant war.

That meant a bloody, raging, ferocious-

_"Alex!"_

-war.

* * *

X-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

**APPROX. 5 days from 'The Incident'**

** TIME: 10:15**

"Alex, I need to talk to you,"

Looking up, Alex placed down his book on the meaning of birdcages and stood up, moving over to stand next to Edward who sat on the sofa.

The man smiled up at him and extended a warm hand. "Now, now. Don't be so stiff, Alex. Come and sit next to me,"

A little woodenly, Alex sat next to him, folding his hands up in an almost military fashion on his lap.

Edward raised his eyebrows and tutted, reaching out to unfold his hands kindly and try and rid the tension from the teenager's shoulders. "Relax, Alex,"

He tried to sink down into the chair more- mimicking the way Edward sat.

Sadly, Mr Pleasure gazed at him, reaching out a gentle hand to tousle his hair, leaving his (larger than his. Stronger than his?) had buried amongst the strands of sunshine, his eyes holding unfathomable feelings within there depths. "How are you today, Alex?"

A little startled at the..._tenderness _to the question, Alex could only duck his head and mutter something indecipherable to his chest, the hand heavy and warm on his head. He revelled in the comfort of it.

"Things have been really difficult for you, Alex. I'm sorry for that,"

Alex looked up carefully.

The man _did _sound sorry.

He sounded hurt- as if he was blaming himself.

Edward caught his eye and gave a rueful smile, ruffling his hair again. "I thought coming to America would be a great new start for you- you know- get you out of your past?"

"It was a great new start," he admitted quietly but firmly, eyes strong. "It was." he paused, gazed out into the distance for a whole before turning back again, a hesitant amount of care in his eyes. "I'll never be able to repay you," thickly, he swallowed, rubbing a hand over his chin and gathering up the courage to keep speaking, Edward listening intently, concernedly and so _gently. _"You gave me...a family. I- I never thought I'd actually find one. Thank you," completely embarrassed now, Alex dropped his head again and concentrated on the stripes on his shirt, counting them in his head to try and take himself away from the conversation.

There was a cotton pause and then, suddenly, Alex was pulled into a fierce hug.

Startled, Alex could only sit still as Edward Pleasure embraced him, the movement full of- full of-

-_family._

Unity.

_Together._

_ (not alone)_

"You'll always be part of the family, Alex," his voice was rough with restrained emotion, and Alex sucked in a breath as the man patted him once on the back and pulled away, gazing into Alex's eyes with a fierceness that _far _outshone any of the wild and savage looks that Alex could _ever _give anyone. It was full of a power that Alex _never _had really had. A power that beat all other powers.

The desire to protect.

His eyes were full of _attachments._

Heavy with tiny golden orbs of _people _and _friendships _and _family _and _love._

And Alex couldn't work out whether that made him strong, or fragile.

"Always, remember that. No matter _what happens, _you will _always _be a part of my family,"

"Always," he found himself repeating hushedly, face feeling oddly warm and..._breakable _at the moment. But the- but the _good _breakable. The breakable that felt...(dare he say it) human.

Faltering.

Like a winter breath in a snow filled forest.

Tangible, _real, _but so precious.

A moment to wrap in time.

"Always," Edward agreed, smiling softly. "But _promise me, _Alex. _Promise me _that you'll _leave _whatever's going on at the moment _alone. _That you _won't _break the family's trust by going alone to try and solve it. It doesn't work like that anymore. You're part of our family- my family- and if you go and search this danger out, the repercussions could be horrendous. I need you to promise me- promise your new family that you will remain with us and will _not _go looking for trouble. Can you do that?"

Promises were precious.

A broken promise was an ugly, horrendous thing in appearance and in truth because there _was _no truth _to _a broken promise. Only thick, swollen and putrid lies.

If there was one thing that Alex _could not stand _it was a promise breaker and a liar.

_(just like Jones and Blunt)_

"I promise," he said, firm, strong, resolved. And his chest felt _warm _instead of the way it usually ached because he had a _family. _He had a _family _who had _chosen _him. _Chosen _him.

Edward ruffled his hair again, smiling widely. "Good lad, I trust you,"

Unable to hold back the grin off of his face, Alex ducked and swiped the hand off of his head cleanly.

* * *

X-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

**APPROX 4 days before 'The Incident'**

** TIME: 12:03**

He should've been at school.

Instead, he was chasing down a could be suspect.

He had caught the man red handed leaving a rusted birdcage full of red flower petals outside their house's door.

He had been walking home, (bunking, the kids would have called it) after growing restless and feeling the rising signs of a...well. He didn't know quite what to call it. Miss Ahmadi would call it a breakdown, but he preferred to see it as a reliving. As a going back to where he was before.

He had been walking home when suddenly, he had seen the man.

He had frozen, surprised at the _idiocy _of the man getting _caught _in the act.

Then their eyes had met.

The man had paused.

Then they had both burst into action.

Alex ran hard, his feet thudding on the ground as he pushed himself to catch up with the fleeing man who had long since dropped the birdcage and now was just pelting away, arms pumping by his sides as he weaved in and out of cars, attempting to lose Alex.

Alex was not easily lost.

Ignoring the pointless movements of the man ahead of him, he streaked in another direction, and put on a burst of speed, flinging himself up some stairs and running across the balcony, keeping an eye on the panting man who ran on the ground beneath him.

The timing needed to be perfect.

The man was directly under him.

Now.

Coiling the muscles in his legs, Alex crouched, and leaped off of the balcony, pinwheeling his arms and positioning himself (just like he'd been taught).

He landed on the man with a heavy thud.

Squawking, the man seemed to crumble beneath him, flailing weakly and spitting out mingled curses and gasps.

Wasting no time (he was lucky the balcony was only a little way off the ground, otherwise the man could be dead and broken), he flipped the man over, efficiently and almost absently avoiding the clumsy blows sent in his direction. Gripping him by the collar, he slammed the man down into the floor and pinned his arms to the ground, leaning into his face, eyes blazing.

"_Who are you?" _he hissed, baring his teeth in a savage expression of rage.

The man coughed once, leaning away from the burning fury of the teen crouched on top of him. "Who do you think I am?" he rasped, letting out a dry little laugh which lapsed into a coughing fit. "Damn," he complained, eyes rolling to look past Alex. "Did you _really _have to jump on me?"

Ignoring the man, he leaned in further, shaking him a little. "I asked you a question," he snapped.

"And you're an idiot if you don't know the answer," the man shot back, seeming irritated even in his weaker position.

Alex narrowed his eyes, breaths a little laboured from his sudden burst of rapid activity. Of course he knew who the man was from. But through him _saying it, _it would reinforce that fact and show a chink in the mans armour that he could exploit. But, it seemed as if the man was going to be difficult.

He had to be fast, though. There was no way he could lose his CIA stalkers for long. "Yeah," he said instead, gazing down at the man with regal scorn in his eyes. "I know where you're from. But what I want to know," he hissed, eyes brimming with violence. "Is _what you want."_

In his fist, the man trembled, raising up slightly shaking hands, his lips wriggling into an ill smile, eyes flickering uneasily around- looking for an escape that wasn't there. "You got the poem, right?" he asked quickly, Alex's eyes narrowing at his obvious stalling for time.

"You know I got it. Care to tell me what it means?" his voice was deadly and pleasant, a chaotic and chilling mix.

Swallowing audibly, the man shook his head hurriedly. "I- I was told to tell you a message."

Alex paused.

_Told to tell you a message._

The chase had been...easy.

No one had yet been caught leaving the flowers except for this man.

_A trick._

Like a snap of the fingers, all of the terror left the mans eyes. He grinned wildly up at Alex, eyes crinkling like wrapping paper and sparkling with twisted mirth. "Figure it out yet, child?" he whispered with a hoarse chuckle.

Alex reared back from the manic look in his eyes, tightening his grip on the mans collar.

The positions had switched.

"Little Alex Rider, all alone in the world he reached out, and Alex stilled as his fingers grazed along his face, the man cooing softly. "Poor little child,"

"Answer me," Alex's tone was quieter, a little more wary at the obviously insane man who he held beneath him. And insane meant unpredictable, and unpredictable meant _danger._

"You don't _understand, _Alex," his face morphed into a sad expression- like a clown. "He only wants what's _best _for you. And to see you having fun with another family _hurts him. _We only want you by our side,"

Breaths tangling in his throat, he listened wide eyed.

"Your daddy said to stay away, didn't he?" at the shocked expression that Alex didn't hide fast enough, a slow smile spread across his face. "Naughty boy," he hummed. "Not listening to your parents,"

"You're wasting time!" he snapped, dragging the man up to face him and ignoring his silly protests. "_What do you want?" _he repeated again, snarling the words out, shaking in his anger.

"Alex, my child," he whispered, jerking his chin in a beckon to lean forward.

Eyes suspicious, he did so, the material of the mans clothes crumpling and rustling as he bent in too.

Hot breath rushed across his ear as the man spoke, everything else oddly silent.

"We want _you,_ child,"

Jerking back, Alex's lips twisted and he towered over the man, fingers clenching at his shirt and disgust and hate spinning in his eyes. "Why you, sick-"

"The fate of your little _family _rests entirely on one decision, Alex," the man carried on over Alex. "The question _is: _What choice will you make?" he spluttered on an ill spent laugh.

"What decision?" he asked quickly. "Tell me!"

"Tick tock, Rider." he murmured, head tipping to the side. "Time's running out,"

"Hands up! Both of you!"

Alex closed his eyes at the sound of the angry CIA Agents.

The man grinned at him.

"Tick tock."

* * *

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

**APPROX. 3 days before 'The Incident'**

** TIME: 23:23**

Alex stared at the inside of his locker.

Lance moved around beside him. "Al, you've been staring into that locker for ages." he drawled, dropping the side of his head onto the lockers and looking lazily at his new British friend. "A love letter?"

Quickly, he shut the locker and shook his head. "Just zoned out for a minute or two," he murmured, eyes not entirely focussed.

Lance groaned, rolling his eyes. "I thought you'd _stopped _with that?"

His lips flickered up into a brief smile. "Seems like I haven't,"he said in a soft teasing.

"Mm," sharply, he looked his friend over. "Right. Anyway, you should have _seen _your sisters face when she heard you'd bunked yesterday," he let out a low whistle, pushing himself off of the lockers. "Priceless,"

Alex winced remembering what had happened the day before. "I know," he muttered.

The teenager let out a rapid laugh, clapping Alex on the back and missing his flinch. "How do you _do _it, man? It's _crazy _how you can just leave and no one even notices!"

Alex allowed the teenager's chatter to wash over him as they walked through the corridors, in his hand, he crumpled the paper that he had found in his locker.

_**Sing a song of sixpence a pocket full of rye,  
Four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie.  
When the pie was opened the birds began to sing,  
Oh wasn't that a dainty dish to set before the king?  
The king was in his counting house counting out his money,  
The queen was in the parlour eating bread and honey  
The maid was in the garden hanging out the clothes,  
When down came a blackbird and pecked off her nose!**_

Yesterday he had searched for clues over just what the man had meant when he said that the safety of his family would rest in one decision that he would have to make, he had searched and searched and pored over the numbers of the flowers delivered (30, 4, 27, 26), the birdcages, the _time of day _they were found and even the way the flowers were positioned.

Nothing.

He had found _nothing._

How he _hated _that word.

And now this poem. If only he knew _what it all meant! _Though he hated to admit it, the words of that man were chewing him up inside.

Alex had always had the weight of the world on his shoulders, ever since he could remember. One decision could catalyst into something else entirely if he didn't make the right one. But to be _told _this and not know what decision he had to make (maybe he'd already _made _the decision, he just didn't _know!_) or when he would have to make it was eating him out.

He crushed the paper harder in one fist, his jaw clenching.

Couldn't he be happy for _once? _Couldn't he just be _left alone _for once? Did he- did he _always _have to question _everything _he did, _everything _he saw and _everything _he trusted?

_Tick tock, Rider._

Time was running out.

But the worse thing was...

...he didn't know what the time was running out _for._

* * *

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

**APPROX. 2 days before 'The Incident'**

**TIME: 16:21**

Breaking a promise once and not being found out made breaking a promise a second time easier.

Breaking a promise a _second _time and not being found out made breaking a promise a third time even easier than the last.

"Stand up, kid. We know you're there."

Muttering a hushed curse, Alex stood slowly, turning to face the hodlers of the voice.

For a second, there was a pause and then one of the Agents hissed out an ugly word.

"I thought we _told _you, kid, to _stay out of this?"  
_"You did," Alex answered smoothly, moving forward with platinum steps, his eyes assessing the area around him.

"Then why the _hell _are you here?" the man barked out.

'Here' happened to be the less safe part of San Fransisco, a place where Alex had managed to follow one of the Agents to attempt to find out what they knew. It had been going all well and good, his crouched hiding on the metal stairs, the Agents talking softly beneath him, until a cat had decided to be startled by his unwanted presence. Alerted by the hissing and spitting of the cat, it hadn't taken them long to work out they were being listened in on.

"I want to know what you know." he answered, coming to a stop in front of him, eyes still wandering over the dank crumbling brick walls and the pipes that leaked and dribbled pools onto the cracked paving stoned ground. Absently, he watched some rubbish move and tremble and blinked when a head of a cat poked out and looked around shiftily before diving back in to scavenge through the rubbish. "Nice place for a meeting, by the way," he added dryly.

"Did you find out anything of interest?" the Agent's voice was tense, his hands flexing by his sides.

Keeping an eye on the hands, Alex tipped his head up and to the side. "Enough to know that you don't know much at all,"  
The men bristled at his comment.

"Listen, kid," one Agent said roughly, advancing on him.

Alex stiffened and _growled. _

The man paused and glanced at his colleagues. Lowering his aggressive stance, he held his palms out until Alex relaxed, though his tiger eyes were still fixed unswervingly on the Agent's face. "Listen," he repeated, tone a little more reasonable. "This isn't _your _world anymore. You're an ordinary teenager now- not a super spy,"

Flinching from the words, Alex raised a hand to rub at his chest.

"So you have to _stay out of our way. _If you were still an Agent, then this would be a different matter. But you _chose _to become ordinary again and so we're going to _treat _you like an ordinary civilian,"

"I didn't choose it," he said a little brokenly. Because he _didn't _choose it. He had never chosen _anything _in his life.

They ignored him.

"We're going to treat you like an ordinary civillian." the Agent smiled grimly, advancing forward a step.

Warily, Alex stepped backwards, taking in the exits.

"And do you know how we treat ordinary civillian teenagers who trespass into scenes that they're not meant to?"

He could guess.

"We tell their parents."

Alex ran.

* * *

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

**APPROX. 1 day before 'The Incident'**

**TIME: 19:28**

Sabina screamed.

Alex was already up and streaking towards her room much before her parents were.

Not even bothering to knock, he flew into her room, took in Sabina who had both hands clasped over her mouth and was staring at something in her bed, moved forward coldly, pushing her out of the way and then could only looking in growing repulsion at what was on her bed.

A dead blackbird, rotting and bloated with maggots lay in morbid innocence on a pure white bed sheets, a splatter of stinking blood framing the poor animal. And there, right at the bottom of where the bird lay, ragged and half-eaten wings spread out as if in one last burst of flight, read a small note written in spidery writing.

_**When down came a blackbird and pecked off her nose!**_

Sabina stifled a sob.

"What's going on!" Edward Pleasure burst into the room, limping slightly with his cane, Liz flying in after.

"What's-"

They paused in horror at the sight of the mangled animal.

Liz muttered something strangled and lurched forward to grab Sabina and pull her back and away from the corpse of the bird, crushing her tight to her chest.

Edward moved forward to stand in silently next to Alex. His face was pale as he quietly surveyed the dead thing in front of him. Softly, he cursed, fingers tightening around the top of his cane.

Alex couldn't tear his eyes away from the bird.

He knew what it meant.

It meant that they could now get into their house without alerting anyone.

And most likely hurt them all without anyone noticing.

Or even...

...kill them.

Alex's eyes darkened.

Enough was enough.

* * *

X-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

'**The Incident'**

** TIME: 15:45**

"Liz! This pie looks _delicious!" _

Sabina caught Alex's eye from the other sofa and rolled her eyes, mouthing "men" and "food".

There were a few clatters from the kitchen, obviously Edward eager to have the first slice of pie.

Liz came down the stairs, her face confused. "What pie?"

"This one!" he called back. "It looks incredible!"

"What's he talking about now?" Liz sighed with mingled long-suffering and affection. Sharing a look with her daughter and adopted son, she shook her head and made her way to the kitchen.

Suddenly, there was a shout and a loud bang.

Nobody even paused.

"Edward!" Liz cried, rushing in and diving to her husbands side who sat wide-eyed and pale on the floor. Distressed, she crouched next to him and peered at the kitchen table. "What on earth-"

"Don't look at the pie!" Edward shouted to Sabina who had crept forward.

Jumping, she jerked back from it, as if she had been burnt. "Why? What's wrong with it?" her expression was suddenly pinched and afraid as she took a few more steps backwards and pressed against Alex, gripping at his arm in fear.

"Just don't look in it," Edward ordered, his voice hoarse and looking extremely sick.

Alex looked.

"That's _disgusting," _he whispered, bile rising to his throat as he too took a step-

-forward.

"Alex!" Edward barked, struggling to stand. "I said _stay away from it!"_

But he couldn't tear his eyes away from the pie-

-filled with dead and maggot infested blackbirds.

And it _stunk._

He thought he was going to vomit.

"What _is it?" _Liz near shrieked, the tension in the air getting to her and frightening her. She gripped tightly at her husbands shoulders, helping him to stand."_What?_"

"You don't need to-"

_Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!_

Eyes snapped to the phone.

Shakily, sharing a glance with everyone, Edward moved forward, Alex's eyes pinned on every single movement he made.

Picking up the phone, he slowly pressed it to his ear.

"Hello?" the father asked threateningly, glaring at his two children and wife intensely. Like a bear- rearing and ready to attack should anything come in his way to try and hurt them.

Alex watched as the look on Edward's _(...his...dad's?) _face finally lost some of its tension at the reply on the other end of the phone, his posture relaxing minimally,; though his eyes remained latched onto his family.

Bewilderment suddenly washed over his face.

Alex stood up, alert.

Edward shot him a warning look.

He drooped. (Only a little bit.)

"What do you mean?" his voice was still full of that thready confusion, one still trembling hand dragging through his silver enthused hair, eyes uncomprehending whatever he was being told. "I...no...it just doesn't make sense. Hold on a second...just let me- no, I'll phone you back in a minute. Ok...no, thank you, though...yes...five minutes...bye." pulling the phone away from his ear, he clumsily jabbed disconnect.

A hush layered the room.

"Who was that?" Liz asked near inaudibly in the choking silence, her eyes flickering towards the table now and then. Desperate to see what had frightened both of her boys so much, but terrified to know at the same time.

"The bank," Edward whispered, mouth dry.

An odd choking moan left Alex's mouth.

Edward shook his head quickly, alarmed at the growing haziness that had entered Alex's eyes. "Not that bank, Alex. Sorry, sorry, I meant a _real _bank," when Alex wasn't responding, he mouthed furiously to Sabina _"medication!"_

Nodding, worried, she quickly moved to the cupboards to grab the bottle of pills, racing back and moving warily towards Alex, very attuned to the fact that when the teenager became like this, he sometimes lost track of his surroundings.

"Alex, hey, son. It's OK." Edward's voice was soothing- like the wind against a worn and sun burned tree.

The fog cleared blearily from Alex's eyes, and confusedly, he gazed down at Sabina who passed him a bottle of pills, her eyes conveying her concern fully.

"Not that bank, Alex," Edward repeated lowly.

Nodding numbly, Alex didn't make a move to open his (hated) bottle of medication, seemingly engrossed with staring at the label on the orange bottle.

"What did they want, then?" Mrs Pleasure asked, moving to Alex and unscrewing the bottle lid for him, firmly placing a glass of water in his hand with a stern look.

Slowly, Edward shook his head, eyes dazed. When he spoke, it was as if he was waiting for his own mouth to question the words that came out, but instead, nothing happened and the words only came out ploddingly, falteringly, full of perplexity. "The money in the bank account-" (Alex _did not _stiffen at the word 'bank') "-has suddenly shot up. It seems..." he swallowed. "Someone's been placing money into my account." haunted eyes looked up at Liz Pleasure. "We're billionares,"

Liz froze. "That's not funny, Edward. Don't joke like that." but she sounded doubtful, voice cracking slightly as panic and unease came knocking on her already frazzled psyche.

"I'm not," Edward sounded as if he desperately wanted to be. "I need to go and check my accounts now. See if they made a mistake." almost in a dreamlike state, he moved past the pie, grimaced, picked it up and shared a look with Alex before moving up the stairs and into his study.

"Mom, what's going on?" Sabina asked bravely, clutching at her arms and crushing them close to her chest.

Shaking her head distantly, Liz seemed to struggle to soak in the words. "I don't know, Sab. I don't know," muttering something else inaubible under her breath, she moved to the cupboards and began dragging out some bread and honey. "I need to sit down and think for a while." popping the lid off of the jar, she glanced at her daughter. "Sabina, do me a favour and hang out the washing for me," she pulled an obviously strained smile, _still _attempting to soothe and protect her children even through all the stress that was happening. "Please?"

"Sure," she answered quickly, and watched with worried eyes as her mother nodded a thanks, told Alex vaguely to have his tablets, and wandered almost aimlessly towards the living room, a plate of bread lathered in honey clutched in one slightly shaking hand.

"Alex," she breathed as the door to the living room shut softly. "What's happening?"

Silently, he shook his head, the pill bottle clasped tightly in one fist. "I don't know," he admitted painfully, the admission making him feel ashamed and weak. He didn't _know. _What type of help was _he _if he didn't _know _anything? He _never _knew nothing!  
Sabina _(my...sister) _didn't seem to mind too much, though, and she nodded once, terselty and moved to gather up the washing and lead a lost Alex outside to hang the washing out.

Sabina worked in silence, refusing Alex's help at first, but allowing him as she noticed the vacant and helpless expression on his usually impenetrable face.

Quietly, they worked pinning the washing up on the washing line, able to hear Edward's voice washing out from the open window of the study, the voice's tone carrying an agitated pitch to it.

" It's weird how fast things can just change," Sabina said, her voice very much like the fog that hung against the sea. "Just," she clipped a pair of jeans to the washing line with a yellow peg. "_Change,"_

Alex didn't reply. He was, after all, the living show to how much things could change.

_Or maybe you drag change with you? _Something whispered helpfully.

Twitching at the unbidden and unknown voice, he shook his head, dismissing it.

There was no way he was going to start talking to voices in his mind now.

"It'll get better," Alex murmured, reaching out and hanging up a t-shirt, stretching and clipping the damp material to the line cleanly and precisely, washing down memories of doing much the same thing with a bright red-headed creature made of starlight, scrambled eggs and smiles.

His fingers trembled as he clipped the final piece down.

An explosion caused both Sabina and Alex to whip around.

Smoke began pouring out from some way off, streets down.

They shared a look.

Slowly, Alex dropped his final blue peg.

They gazed at each other, smoke still spreading and already touching the air they were in. A breeze rustled their hair, Sabina's dark hair floating across her wide blue eyes framed by those dark lashes, her hands still full of wet washing. Alex gazed back, his golden hair sweeping across his darker eyes, getting tangled in his lashes.

It was a moment of perfection, the sun laying laced kisses upon each of them, lighting up Alex's hair in shades of richness and wealth, sending Sabina's dark locks aglow with a shining dark light.

Alex's foot shifted back.

Sabina's clear ocean eyes never left Alex's. "Don't do it, Alex," she said softly, a note of crystal pleading liquefying in her timeless words. "Don't,"

"I have to, Sabina," he said quietly, hair still brushing gently across his eyes and cheeks. "You know it's the **B**irdcag**E**. This could be the chance to catch them,"

"It's not your job anymore, Alex," she replied.

"I _have _to,"

"You promised not to," the breeze shuffled her hair again, rustling it like glossy silk.

"Sabina..." his other foot shifted backwards. "I have to."

"Would you really break your promise like that?" hurt was heavy in her voice. "Leave us when we need you the most?"

Time was running out. The people could be gone by now. "Sabina, I'm _sorry,"_

"Don't, Alex," her voice cracked, she took a step forward.

He took a step back, crushing down the voice that told him to _stay! Stay! And don't break promises! _

Her lips shook, eyes grew glassy. "_Don't."_

He stiffened his jaw, ducked his head. "Sorry." he murmured and left.

It was for _their _benefit, he thought as he ran towards where the explosion was, darting past the people who had come outside to gape and gasp over the coils of smoke coming from where the explosion had happened. The only reason he was doing this was to _end _what had had already _begun. _Breaking a promise for a decision of that caliber was fine, right?

_Decision._

He faltered, feet almost tangling beneath him as he stumbled, gazing out blankly.

_Surely not..._

No, he was being paranoid.

He put on a new burst of speed.

But, just it case...

He'd better run a little faster.

Reaching the site of the explosion, Alex had to press his t-shirt up to his nose, squinting at the harsh and noxious fumes that rolled from the blast site, eye watering in smell and poison from the heavy fumes. Avoiding the fire fighters who had already flooded the scene as well as men and women in suits (obvious Agents), he slipped around the site, looking for clues, swiping at his burning and watering eyes.

There had to be-

"Boo."

Alex's eyes widened.

A weight slammed into him from behind.

Choking as he inhaled a large amount of the fumes, he rolled to lessen the impact as he fell, the weight on top of him trying to push him down.

Blind, Alex struggled, swallowing down panic as he realised that they were moving closer to the fire _(it was all over him! Eating at his skin!) _and due to the heaviness of the smoke, he couldn't even see his attacker or whether he had any weapons.

Grunting as an elbow slammed into the side of his face, Alex tensed his back muscles and kicked out, catching the man (it was a man) in the softer regions, satisfied when the weight momentarily left him. Staggering up, he cursed as the man wrapped hands around his ankle and dragged him down again, roughly grabbing the back of his shirt and throwing him to the ground.

Seeing stars, Alex heaved and bucked, trying to wrestle the man off of him before he threw him into the flames. Choking on the hot and acrid air, Alex coughed and hacked as a foot caught him heavily in the stomach, winding him and leaving him retching onto the ground, his smoke covered pursuer grabbing him roughly by the arms and hauling him up- and luckily- away from the blast site.

Head spinning, Alex tried to pick up his feet as he was dragged quickly away, his eyes watering and burning, mouth dry and lungs on fire as well as his skin. Choking on every breath he sucked in, Alex groaned as he was pushed up against a wall, his face slapped a few times for good measure.

"Wakey, wakey, Rider," a rough voice demanded, the meaty hand slapping his face again.

Forcing himself to clear his confusion, he shook his head and strained to focus in on the swaying, shifting and blurring man. "Wha-" he croaked and then winced. The smoke felt like it had torn half of the insides of his throat out.

"How are you today, ladybird?"

Was he dreaming this? Or was the man actually saying this?

He moaned as the hand was brought roughly against his cheek again.

"So, we managed to smoke you out, did we, ladybird?" his grinning face swam in Alex's bleary vision. "Did you work out the puzzle, ladybird? Have you worked out the riddles yet?"

He couldn't _think, _let alone work anything _out. _Gosh, his _head _hurt.

A rough hand pulled on his chin, forcing his attention. "Everything stems from one decision," the words flew across Alex's skin like _fire. _Hundreds of feral eyes swam across Alex's vision, his eyes stung as he narrowed them, trying to pin one pair of the ferocious eyes down. "_Buzz. _Wrong decision. Always keep your promises,"

_What?_

Coldness settled in the pit of his stomach.

"Foolish, child,"

With herculean effort, Alex ripped himself from the grip and staggered back, swinging one hand and catching the man by the neck. "_What did you do?!" _he shouted, panic overflowing through him like thousands upon thousands of worms and bugs. He pressed his hand around the neck harder _"What did you do?!"  
_The man wheezed, one hand lifting up, grinning, showing his palm.

_**yoUrE iT.**_

Alex flew away from the man as if he'd been burnt.

_** "**__Fly away home, ladybird," _the man giggled.

Wide eyed, Alex staggered back.

The man burst into hysterical laughter.

Spinning round, he tore away, the manical laughter of the man following him even as he sprinted down the street, his lungs burning, the taste of copper burning in his mouth.

_(ladybird, ladybird, fly away home)_

Tearing round a corner, Alex staggered as his legs buckled. Coughing, wheezing, he pushed himself on, terror screaming at him to _**run faster! Run harder! Quick! Quick QUICK!**_

_(your house is on fire, your children are gone)_

_ Please be OK, please be OK! _He was an idiot. A stupid, stupid, stupid _idiot! _He was an _**idiot! **_Sobbing into his breaths _(he was almost there!) _he caught himself as his (stupidstupidstupid) legs tanglde beneath him again and he grabbed hold of a wall, pushing himself off again-

-pausing at the sight of three dead Agents placed in front of the door as if they were just sleeping in a pool of ruby, their hands clasping a red Begonia each.

_(all accept one and that's little Ann)_

The breath vanished from his lungs.

Racing up towards his (oddly silent) house and pushing open the (wasn't open before) front door, and stumbling in, panting, leaving black marks from the soot all over the cream carpet and walls.

"Sabina!" his voice cracked. "Mum! Dad!" pressing his hand against the wall, his head still spinning from smoke inhalation, he pushed open each door to the downstairs rooms, yelling and shouting until his voice was ragged.

Something was wrong.

Something was so so wrong.

Gasping, his eyes burning and wide, wet and full of water and fear, he moved upstairs, still shouting, his knees trembling, begging to be allowed to rest.

_"Sabina! Mum! Dad!" _he yelled raggedly, throwing himself into Sabina's room, his parents room his-

-he froze.

A muffled sound was coming from the slightly open door to the study.

_(and she's crept under the warming pan)_

"Sabina?" he whispered, the tick-tick-tick of the clock hung on the hallway wall hissing at him, the thumps reverberating towards him with violent little shoves.

Slowly, he stepped forward, footsteps muffled on the carpet.

Closer.

_(tick-tick-tick)_

Closer.

_(tick-tick-tick)_

He reached out a hand as he met the door, clammy palm raised up, pushing inwards-

-the door creaked open, he held his burning breaths.

_Creeeak..._

Silently, it swished inwards.

"Sabina?" he whispered.

The lights were all off in the room, the curtains pulled tightly shut.

A whimpering muffled moan hit him at the same time of the stench.

Dried blood and body fluids.

"Sabina." Alex stood frozen, not daring to hit the light switch.

Shivering, he moved further into the room, the smell stronger by every step he took.

The whimpering grew louder.

His eyes caught a shape huddled against the wall.

Heart thudding, feeling ill, he dropped down to the shape, and reached out blindly to turn it towards him.

Two soaking blue eyes turned onto him, dark wet hair pressed against a sweaty and tear drenched face. Her eyes rolled, the gag in her mouth moving as she moaned something out.

Alex swore.

With trembling hands, he leaned in quickly to tear off her gag, his hand landing in something wet, warm and foul smelling.

Pulling away, he gazed at her.

She'd wet herself.

Wasting no more time, he pulled the gag out of her mouth, pushing her hair away from her sweaty face.

"Sabina, Sabina! What happened?" he whispered, gripping her shoulders.

She mumbled something, eyes dead.

"What?" cold all over again, he tried to get her to repeat it.

"Turn on the lights," she whispered.

He stilled in the darkness.

_He didn't want to._

But still, he found himself stood up and moving back to the door where the light switch was-

-reaching out with numb fingers-

-pressing against the lightswitch-

-closing his eyes-

-turning around-

-opening his eyes and-

-choking on a sob and scream.

Liz and Edward Pleasure lay side by side on the ground, blood soaking the cream carpet around them, splashed on the walls, mouths still open in a scream of painterroragony, and black birds surrounding their bodies in a ragged circle, wings still open as if for one last try of flight.

But Edward had no eyes.

And Liz had no ears.

_"Mum, Dad," _Sabina moaned from the corner, hands over her head, rocking herself.

Horror and sick feeling filled his insides and he swayed, dropping to his knees, mind shutting down.

But not before something glinted and caught his attention.

Forcing his dull eyes up, a silent scream roaring in his chest, he looked at what was shining, reaching out a badly shaking hand and lifting up the silver envelope and jar.

He tore the envelope a few times as he opened it, his hands not fully under his control.

A heavy feeling was lodged in his chest and throat, making it hard to- hard to _breathe _even as he unfolded the letter with spasming and jerking fingers.

_**SinG a soNg of sIxpENcE a PocKeT fuLl Of rYE,  
foUr aNd tWEntY BLacKbirDd bAkEd in A piE.  
WHen THe pIe wAS oPeNeD tHe BirDs beGaN tO sInG,  
oh wasNt thAT a dAinTy dISh tO sEt BefORe tHE kiNG?  
THE kINng waS iN hIs counTIng hoUSe cOuntiNg oUT hIs mONeY,  
The QuEeN wAs iN tHe paRlouR EAtinG bReAd aNd hoNEy  
The MaId was IN tHe **__**gARDen hAngIng OuT thE cLotHes,  
wHen dOWn cAmE A bLacKbirD aNd peCked OfF heR nOse!**_

Bile rose to his throat as he turned the letter over again.

_**tImEs uP, lAdYbiRd**_

Blackness was the only thing he knew after.

* * *

X-x-x-x-x-x

Crouched outside the hospital room door, Alex clutched at his hair, gasping silently into the frigid _(too clean) _air, listening to the muffled voices beyond the door.

"That _idiot, _kid!" the voice belonged to that of yet another CIA Agent. "Bailey, Lawrence and Peter _told _him not to get involved and now look what his meddling's done!" the man's voice broke and crumpled. "Lord, _how _do we tell Peter's fiancée?"

Alex let out a soft moan, gripping his hair tighter.

"Don't- don't _think _about that now," another voice whispered. "What about the girl? She saw everything! No amount of therapy will ever get rid of that,"

"What about the parents?" a different voice hissed.

An uneasy pause. "Dead. They _gouged _the man's eyes out and _cut off _the lady's ears. A messy and long way to die,"

A swear word spat into the surroundings.

"They _told him," _the first voice started again, bending and breaking on an angry yell, restrained to a flexing whisper.

"Toby-"

"No, they _told him! _And now look what's happened because he-"

"Shh!"

Quieter, still torn with serrated flames. "And now look what's happened because he can't _keep promises and keep his nose out of others business!"_

_ Your fault. Your fault, _a voice pointed out in boredom.

"My fault," he agreed in a vacant murmur.

"What now, then?"

"The girl, Sabina, she'll need constant counselling and therapy,"

"The boy?" curses at the mention.

Alex closed his eyes.

The voice was cold, merciless. "He's shown where he wants to be. He's going to be the CIA's new secret weapon."

A pause.

The voices were nearly inaudible. "How many missions can we squeeze out of him?"

"We'll have to see. MI6 will be pestering for their toy back,"

"He hasn't got anyone left,"

Rough with rage. "I bet he killed them all himself,"

"Frank."

"Death would've been easier than the life he'll be living,"

"He should'nt have _left."_

_ "The stupid kid."  
_

Slowly, Alex moved up to stand, hardly aware of his movements as he floated ghost-like back to his hospital room, hands brushing ethereally against the walls, breaths _(real? Unreal?) _blooming and reeding out of his mouth.

Pushing open the door to his room, he moved like melted silver into the bed, and just sat staring blankly up at the ceiling.

Just...sat.

And gazed.

_"A secret weapon."_

_ "Death would've been easier than the life he'll be living."_

_ "They told him,"_

_ "And now look what's happened because he _can't keep promises and keep his nose out of others business!_"_

Blood. So much blood. It was everywhere. Sticky and heavy and clinging to his skin.

So much _blood._

"My fault," he whispered to the ceiling.

_Your fault, _the ceiling agreed.

His fault.

He didn't know how long he sat and stared at the ceiling, but suddenly a knock on his door broke him out of his thoughts.

Tilting his head to the side, he gazed dully at the door.

Another knock sounded.

Ah. They wanted to be let in, didn't they?

He supposed he should tell them to come in.

No words left his mouth.

More knocks.

"Come in," he finally managed, the words draining him, eyes closing.

The door swung open, and footsteps approached his bedside.

"Time to get up, Sabina's awake," the voice was forcefully neutral, but Alex recognised it as Toby's voice, straining on a scream of _why would you **do **that?!_

Struggling to open his eyes, Alex got up and followed the men, detachedly noticing the stiff and tense way they held themselves around him, but unable to muster the energy to give a wry smile.

"This way," one of the men said tersely.

Alex just followed, watching the lights spray shadows across the ground, their hands twisting and reaching for him.

He wished they'd turn the lights off.

Let them all bathe in black.

"Here," the door clicked open and Alex suddenly found himself by Sabina's bedside, gazing down at her pale and almost lifeless face with distant fascination.

She looked dead.

_(as dead as daddy, as dead as mummy, as dead as Ian, as dead as Jack, as dead as Edward, as dead as Liz)_

Pale blue eyes flickered up to meet his.

They held each others gaze.

Alex felt the overwhelming need to drop to his knees under the weight of those eyes.

"They're dead." Sabina whispered, voice crackling into the air like static.

Alex could only drop his head in a soft nod.

Sabina pulled her eyes away, fixed them on his forehead (as if just _looking _at him was making her sick). "They...came when you went," she mumbled, not seeming to notice any of the Agents in the room taking notes.

Neither did Alex.

It was just her and Sabina.

The only one left.

The ladybird and Ann.

"They...got me when I was outside, still hanging out the washing..." her fingers twitched against the material of her hospital gown. "Mum was in the lounge and dad was upstairs...they...gagged me and then-" her breath shuddered out of her chest, lips chapped and dry, eyes lost. "They just...wouldn't _stop, _Alex. They wouldn't _stop. _Mum and Dad were- were screaming telling them- telling them to _stop _or just- just let me stop watching but they- they-" her lips trembled. "They wouldn't _stop,"_

Alex's hands slid onto hers.

She jerked them away and tossed wide eyes onto him, full of confusion, hurt, betrayal and-

-his breath jerked.

"Why would you _leave _like that, Alex? Why would you just _leave?!" _she reared out of her bed, eyes welling and pushing herself out of bed.

Alex took a tiny step backwards. "I'm sorry," he croaked, own eyes filling. "I was only trying to-"

"You _promised," _she reminded in an acidic voice that was brimming and overflowing with pain and hurt. "You _promised _that you wouldn't. If you- if you just _stayed-" _she broke off.

But it was clear what she was going to say.

_If you'd just stayed then none of this would have happened._

"I'm so sorry," he said, strangled and breathless, one hand reaching to his hair as if to tear it off, yank it off of him. "I'm _so sorry,"_

"Not good enough," she took another step forward, and Alex took a step back. She was crying now. "It's _all your fault!" _

Alex's eyes widened as she launched at him.

She was a flurry of snot and tears and hair against wet cheeks and sobs of: "_It's your fault! Your fault! It's all your fault!" _and her nails were tearing biting, scratching, hands raking over skin, reaching for eyes, screaming, shrieking, kicking even as they pulled her off, even as they ushered him out of the room.

_"It's all your fault!"  
_

The door shut behind him.

Heart beating fast, Alex wiped some blood from off of his face with a cold and shaking hand, breathing raspily as he stood still outside her room, listening to her screams and the voices of the doctors and Agent's as they tried to calm her down, her sobbing, hysterical voice.

"It's all my fault," he gasped to no one imparticular, hands twisting and pulling and pulling and twisting.

The Agent next to him turned and regarded him coolly. "Yes, it is," he turned away again.

"Ah..." the hands violently began pulling at each other, tugging and pulling, his breaths breaking out in anxious staccato. Hyperventilating, wheezing, breathing rough and harsh and trembling. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry sorry sorrysorrysorry," he babbled, hands moving to his hair again.

"Quit it!" the man snapped, pulling his hands away from his hair. "Shut up and stand quietly!"

He shut up and stood quietly, breaths still loosing like broken and soggy paper aeroplanes.

It was quieter in the room now, and the door opened, and shut, the Agents turning to murmur to each other.

The sharp ringing of a phone burst into the hall.

One of the Agents quickly snapped up his phone, spared a glance at the unmoving and obviously disconnected teen and spoke into the device.

Alex found it extremely difficult to focus on the conversation even as they didn't much bother to hide it from him.

Soon, the phone was down, and they were whispering again.

"...move fast..."

"...what! How do MI6...?"

"...they don't know anything, do they?"

"...demanding him back..."

"...don't know anything..."

"...covered up all of the evidence. Definitely won't find..."

"...MI6 are on their way..."

"We need to get him back to headquarters."

That didn't sound good.

Somehow, he couldn't find the energy to figure out how to get out of this.

A hand gripped his elbow.

He looked up.

Stern eyes gazed down at him. "Time to get dressed," was the rough command.

Alex suddenly found himself in his room, pulling on jeans and a t-shirt and staring into a mirror, CIA Agents outside his room and that ever growing choking lump in his chest and throat.

_You need to escape, _a voice hissed, gripping him and shaking him. _Quick! Otherwise you'll get turned into the CIA's toy!_

Pausing in running a feverish hand through his hair he stopped.

That was right.

He needed to escape.

Run.

Run where?

_Run away._

Where was away?

_Far from here._

_ (he was sorry)_

What about the **B**irdcag**E**?

_Kill them all._

He tilted his head to the side.

Sounded good.

"Are you done yet?" an Agent barked from the other side of the room.

"Yes," he murmured and his eyes darkened.

Opening up the door, the Agent turned to scowl at him. "Took you-"  
He threw a punch.

The man dropped.

"What the- hands up!" his colleague yelled, pulling out a taser.

He never got a chance to use it. The tiger eyed boy ducked and swung a kick at his middle.

He, too, dropped.

Alex turned and sprinted.

"Down!" Agents were running after him now, no doubt alerted by the other down-and-out Agent's shouts.

Even as Alex burst into the cool night air and out of the hospital, alarming nurses and doctors, the Agents were still hot on his tail.

The streetlights bathed the tarmac in a milky glow and Alex ran, the Agents after him, yelling and shouting.

Alex slowed to a stop when he noticed figures slipping in front of him.

To his surprise, the pursuing Agents slowed to a stop too.

"Who are you?" an Agent asked sharply somewhere behind Alex, his American accent ringing out through the night air.

"MI6," a man said coldly, stepping into the bath of the streetlights.

Alex tensed as the mans eyes came to rest on him.

"We're here to retrieve our charge," the eyes flickered off of him and pinning on the CIA Agents.

"He's America's property now," the voice was smooth, casual but tinged with danger, an Agent stepping forward into the light too.

A grim and humourless smile stretched across the mans face. "I think you'll find that he's Britain's property. Now, _step back from Agent Rider," _his voice was laced with poison, taking another step forward.

"You're on _American _soil, _Agent. _Agent Rider is now _American." _he smiled almost pleasantly. "Why don't _you step back from Agent Rider?" _he took a step forward.

The MI6 Agents stiffened, hands moving for tranquilizer guns.

The CIA Agents stiffened, hands shifting for tranquilizer guns.

"Don't make me use force," the MI6 Agent warned, voice deadly.

"Same goes to you," the CIA Agent smiled, voice hard.

Alex stood frozen and still, the air left the area.

"Hold Agent Rider!"

"Don't let him leave!" the two leaders shouted at the same time.

Everyone swept forward in a graceful move for the teen.

Alex turned tail and ran, dodging arms and fighting Agents.

A hand grabbed his wrist and their came a triumphant British yell of victory when a CIA Agent swiftly began attacking her, both fighting with almost feline grace.

Panting, Alex slipped in and out of Agents, the mass fight giving him the clear opportunity to leave.

Which he did.

Running, unsure of where he was and where to go, Alex broke out of the crowd of fighting Agents only for a hand to clap him roughly on the shoulder.

He was about to twist and deliver his capturer a nasty strike when something sharp jabbed him in the arm.

His eyes blurred and he sank to the ground, eyes closing softly on the sight of the Agents still fighting.

* * *

X-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

A fluffy pillow pressed against his face and Alex peeled open his eyes, a heavy sickness in his chest and head and stomach.

He moaned.

And then froze when a hand brushed against his hair.

"Good morning, child," an almost amiable _(slightly old, middle 50's?) _voice crooned down to him, the hand still stroking his hair from his eyes.

Alex blinked, heart thudding wildly. He'd thought- he'd thought that he'd been captured by one of the Intelligence groups! Where- where was-

Slowly, he turned and faced whoever was brushing his hair back.

He met eyes with pale brown.

The man smiled, the slight lines of age on his face lifting, his hand still brushing Alex's hair back. "Welcome home, child," he murmured, eyes sparking with something death giving and hungry. "Welcome to the **B**irdcag**E**, child. Welcome home."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

**...DUN DUN DUUUUNNN! ANOTHER CLIFFHANGER!**

**And, yes. For this, I will leave you waiting another near month. Ha!**

***no one laughs* ahem...I was joking. _Joking! _But, seriously, sorry about the wait! It was _life, _ya know? Life and school and projects and everything in between. But I'm OK now, so I can get back to delivering! You must remember, though that when I write the story, it always stays with me, everyday. So, I suppose, for you, it depends on when I update, but for me, the story's _always _there, so...um...to me, it's like a constant update. Make sense?**

** I must thank you for your kind words, though! Wow! You're all so nice and stuff! Thank you very much to all of those who inquired over my state of being and just genuinely wanted to know whether I was well. (: I was, thank you for asking!**

** And...REVIEWER AWARDS! *readers look hungrily at the bottom of page. Pause. THERE'S NOTHING THERE! * cough cough* yes, well, simply, that's because I'm going to POST THEM ON MY PROFILE LATER! So, if you reviewed the last chapter, go and check! (Ps. They won't be there straight away, but they'll be up either later today or definitely tomorrow) So, yeah! Check! And, um, REVIEW! **

**(Thank you for waiting!)**


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